| Sex with a Man who Can't Finish
Posted: 9/2/2007 6:36:46 AM | | I was dating a guy in his early 40's who had a problem I couldn't deal with. He would call it "incredible endurance". In reality, it was awful for me cause he would be pounding away during intercourse for what seemed like forever and never ejaculate. The guy couldn't cum. I think it is because he had some unresolved issues with his ex. She left him after 20 years of marriage (for his boss lol) and he couldn't handle that. She was overbearing too. Anyhow I broke up with him because it ended up being very painful and very very weird. This was a new one to me. Anyone ever experienced this? | |
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| Sex with a Man who Can't Finish
Posted: 9/2/2007 6:40:32 AM | | Thats sad that you broke up over this . There are times I do not finish and the lady loves I can last a long time. Than other times I cum quicker. You can always have him pull out . Communication is the key. | |
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| Sex with a Man who Can't Finish
Posted: 9/2/2007 6:41:06 AM | | Yes, it is common for women to break up with a men rather than work out any initial problems they have together. | |
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| Sex with a Man who Can't Finish
Posted: 9/2/2007 6:51:00 AM | | The issue was he never finished. Not once. It was painful to me to the point that I was bleeding. Not once but many times. We discussed it and he researched the problem. But he couldn't fix it and it was horrible for me. I had no choice but to break up. I think it was an emotional problem. He couldn't open up to me. He also couldn't talk about his ex. Except to say that he understood why she left him cause the other guy had a better job. Weird in my opinion. | |
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| Sex with a Man who Can't Finish
Posted: 9/2/2007 6:53:01 AM | I had to change my post because your answer came in and changed my view. If you did talk to him, did he go to the doctor? There are reasons that this could happen. Was he ever able to finish--ever in his life? Perhaps try different techniques--more foreplay for him prior to the act. Seems that this is the same reason that many men get frustrated with women. I would hate to think of how many women would end up with a partner if someone did not spend some time trying to figure it out.
If he never could finish I'm not sure why he would have continued until you were bleeding. That seems rather S & M.
I'm wondering why you are posting about this. Are you thinking of going back? Are you afraid of getting in a similar situation again (I have my doubts this happens very frequently out there). What is it you hope to find?
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| Sex with a Man who Can't Finish
Posted: 9/2/2007 6:56:59 AM | | My ex-husband of 22 years had some periods of time when he was like that. I think it was psychological. I actually looked it up in a medical library, can't remember what it's called, there are not a lot of definitive answers what to do about it. But it's really a dysfunction and anyone who tells you you should have communicated better or breaking up was a lame way to resolve it, has their head in the sand. Thought the OP could use a little support here. | |
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| Sex with a Man who Can't Finish
Posted: 9/2/2007 6:59:51 AM | I once heard a comic say this...really made me laugh....
If a woman cant cum.....we are doing something wrong
If a man cant cum....we are doing something wrong and have to see "someone"....
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| Sex with a Man who Can't Finish
Posted: 9/2/2007 7:04:21 AM | | It was a dysfunction for sure. We had hours of foreplay. So it wasn't that. And he never came once during intercourse in the months that we dated. In fact, I never saw him come at all. I have had experience with my ex (was married over 15 years to him) that men sometimes can't finish because they are tired or under stress. That is understandable. But this new guy could never finish. I told him to see a doctor. But he refused. He couldn't accept that he had a problem. So it reached a point where I didn't want be near him and definitely not in the same bed as hm since I couldn't endure the pain any more. Can't continue a relationship like that. Talked to my friends about it. They had never heard of it either. But they agreed that if I thought it was a problem ... it was a problem. | |
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| Sex with a Man who Can't Finish
Posted: 9/2/2007 7:09:13 AM | Reply to
Just wondered if he could bring himself to orgasm,without you...?????
I think he could. But I have no evidence.
And it's not because I'm not attractive. I am considered very attractive by many men. Any thoughts on what is the cause of this? | |
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| Sex with a Man who Can't Finish
Posted: 9/2/2007 8:49:37 AM | So Op...is this the same man that you're apparently having that five year affair with and have posted in relationships as:
I have been seeing a married man for over 5 years. We met through work. He has a young son. I am divorced with children. In the beginning of our relationship (which was very sexually charged) we talked about him leaving his wife. But he just couldn't do it. He felt it would be too difficult for friends and family to accept. I try to give him up but I always want to see him again. He is the sexiest man I have ever been with and I am totally in love and will always love him. I date other men but I have the secret hope that my married friend will someday leave his wife and be with me. Circumstances being different I know he would have chosen me. But he doesn't want to disappoint all the other people in his life. Is there any hope?
Can anyone say TROLL... where's the delete button. | |
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| Sex with a Man who Can't Finish
Posted: 9/2/2007 8:54:26 AM | | The issue seems to be more that someone would keep doing an activity knowing it's physically painful to a partner and causing bleeding. Male or female, people should respect a partner enough to work out something that doesn't physically hurt the other partner. | |
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| Sex with a Man who Can't Finish
Posted: 9/2/2007 8:56:35 AM |
So Op...is this the same man that you're apparently having that five year affair with and have posted in relationships as:
I have been seeing a married man for over 5 years. We met through work. He has a young son. I am divorced with children. In the beginning of our relationship (which was very sexually charged) we talked about him leaving his wife. But he just couldn't do it. He felt it would be too difficult for friends and family to accept. I try to give him up but I always want to see him again. He is the sexiest man I have ever been with and I am totally in love and will always love him. I date other men but I have the secret hope that my married friend will someday leave his wife and be with me. Circumstances being different I know he would have chosen me. But he doesn't want to disappoint all the other people in his life. Is there any hope?
Can anyone say TROLL... where's the delete button.
Wrong thread? Where is the "D'oh!" button? | |
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| Sex with a Man who Can't Finish
Posted: 9/2/2007 9:02:08 AM | I deal with this issue myself because I take Zoloft. It makes me last forever which is frustrating for everyone involved. It sounds weird, but for me to finish I need to be incredibly mentally stimulated. The physical stimulation just doesn't cut it now that I'm taking this medication. Dirty talk works wonders for sure.
Definately a nasty side effect of these types of drugs, but usually the negative side effect is worth all the positives that it does. | |
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| Sex with a Man who Can't Finish
Posted: 9/2/2007 9:13:00 AM |
Wrong thread? Where is the "D'oh!" button?
^^^ Hardly...look in the relationships forums under Long Term Affair ... Will We Ever Be Together? ...Same Op. | |
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| Sex with a Man who Can't Finish
Posted: 9/2/2007 10:08:48 AM | Damned if you do, Damned if you don't!  What the hell is a guy supposed to do?
1. They get dumpped if they cum too fast and can't last. Damn and some say a hour is not enough.
2. They get dumpped if they can't cum at all. All they want is a guy that can last and when they get it they complain! As in this posting.. :Laugh:
3. They get dumpped if they are too small she can't feel it. Hell that might be the same girl who only get's off on fisting..
4. They get dumpped if they are too big and it hurts, They talk about everyone on the net having 10+ inches. Yet if they really got one they would surely complain.
5. They get dumpped for talking about sex. There are dozens of post of women complaining about men who talk about sex to them all the time, yet have photos of themselves in thongs posted.
6. They get dumpped for not talking about sex. They feel that the man is not interested in sex and they are...
I guess we can't make you women happy huh? | |
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pacie
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Joined: 8/11/2007
Msg: 17 | |
| Sex with a Man who Can't Finish
Posted: 9/2/2007 10:15:16 AM | | That's kinda funny. I think as women (this could just be my own opinion) we think men are always gonna finish the job. We always read in mags that we need to relax and go with the flow, not to think about the finish line otherwise many times we won't be satsified. I was with a guy who didn't cum everytime, and although I couldn't wrap my head around it, it was kinda nice to have someone make sure i was satisfied before he was done. And yeah, you can always ask him to stop. | |
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| Sex with a Man who Can't Finish
Posted: 9/2/2007 10:40:47 AM | | I've had the same problem for years, and you're right a lot of it stems from a long bad relationship. I guess I'm fooling myself to think if I met a woman that cared enough it would make a difference. If I ever meet such a woman I hope to h*ll it does! | |
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| Sex with a Man who Can't Finish
Posted: 9/2/2007 1:28:30 PM | to jezze-belle
No this wasn't the married guy. I had broken up with the married guy to date this guy. I had broken up with the married guy a million times (but that's another string).
Then with this boyfriend the sex was so gawdawful I had to break up with him. Or I'd be locking myself in a room to get away from him. He was very sad when I broke up. But I couldn't handle it anymore and he had no plan to resolve the issue.
I had only dated this guy for maybe 2 months. He was attracted to me. Was hard all the time. But for some bizarre psychological reason couldn't finish like I said.
If you think you've seen everything, you haven't til you've seen this.
If it weren't for bad luck, I'd have no luck at all.
And no I don't want anybody to feel sorry for me. I am just interested in talking and learning cause this is a very strange world we live in. | |
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eman07
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Joined: 6/30/2006
Msg: 22 | |
| Sex with a Man who Can't Finish
Posted: 9/2/2007 3:36:23 PM | sin...
Does he take any kind of supplements?....weight lifter?....anything at all?
steriods?....ephedra?....do you know of?...
could be ...just taking stabs in the dark though... | |
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| Sex with a Man who Can't Finish
Posted: 9/2/2007 3:49:04 PM | Sin,
Why don't you discuss this with your husband and your married boyfriend. I'm sure they could provid you some insight on what you are doing wrong.
JMO | |
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| Sex with a Man who Can't Finish
Posted: 9/2/2007 4:04:29 PM | Hmmm Yeah I think communication would be the key here!!
How can this be weird as this is a stereotype must for a woman, 'lasting'! | |
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