| In looking for a relationship on POF, have you run into this before?
Posted: 10/10/2007 2:22:45 AM | | Ok...I checked, and I think maybe I have it in the right place, but I'm relatively new here, so bear with me please. I was just doing a job search on a site that has multiple platforms, and noticed they had a personals section. In going there and browsing the threads I came across a really interesting title, so I thought I'd check it out. What I read was mind boggling (at least to me)!!! Instead of stating his height, weight, blah, blah....this guy had written out (from a female perspective no less) what it would be like to run into him in a club somewhere, with a date ensuing. It was excellently written, so much so that I wonder if he does it for a living. I must say it REALLY got my attention!!! It also got me wondering...have any of you ever encountered a profile which described a fantasy meeting, rather than the run of the mill information that is usually found on them? Just curious. | |
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| In looking for a relationship on POF, have you run into this before?
Posted: 10/10/2007 2:55:25 AM | No, your not alone in being as you called it "mind boggled".
Although I answer all mail with a quick or long hello or a goodbye, reading a profile with the same old thing gets stale. I've read wonderfull profiles with descriptions that place you where they want you to be and wrote to thank them for the great read.
If it grabs your interest and or attention, they have done the job and done it well.
Im wondering if you responded to him and told him so? | |
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| In looking for a relationship on POF, have you run into this before?
Posted: 10/10/2007 3:35:30 AM | | Yes, actually I did...I told him that although I didn't know who he was, and while I knew I wasn't what he was searching for (or even close, lol), I had to tell him how lucky some woman was going to be to find a man who actually KNOWS what romance and passion are!!! My GOD, he was such an articulate writer, I felt as if I were "there" in that scenario, experiencing it as he wrote it. Lol...what's even funnier....I posted this and went to another old date site (one of the few I kept after recently ditching the majority of them) and there was a letter from a young man that literally brought me to tears. What is this....pick on "Rosey" night? lol....the tears were not entirely from sadness....the message was so romantic and so sad (from my point of view, not his...at least not until he gets my answer) that I just broke down and sobbed. My daughter woke up and asked why I was crying so. I couldn't tell her, so I just said yes when she asked if I was having a bad night, because that wasn't entirely untrue. | |
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| In looking for a relationship on POF, have you run into this before?
Posted: 10/10/2007 5:01:08 AM | | isnt it refreshing to know that some people actually take the time to write something out of the norm and give more insight to themselves before we've even met the person. and isnt it wonderful to find out that someone can write in such a way that it can touch us in ways we thought were lost because we havent experienced such a thing for what feels like forever that can help us relate to another human and remind us we arent the only ones that feel that same exact way or remind us of some similar experience from our own past. i thought about writing a profile that was out of the norm explaining what my one true wish in life is, but after realizing most men dont have the mindset to read thru long things(unless there's money involved..ie some sort of finance related contract), i dismissed the idea and decided that if they want to know ME, they have to make the time/emotional investment to do that, just like they expect that same effort of me. | |
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| In looking for a relationship on POF, have you run into this before?
Posted: 10/10/2007 6:07:51 AM | Being a creative writer does not necessarily correlate to being a good mate.......however it does correlate to being a creative and imaginative writer....
thank you ..... I'm sorry i misunderstood .. the instructions said profile which i took to mean try to describe yourself .. which for most people is very hard to do .... now if the instructions had said ... write a novel ...extra credit will be given for creative writing...creative writing isnt that another term for fiction ....seams like , to me any way , you women cant decide what you want ... creative writing .. romantic skills the ability to write/talk the pants right off of you .. those are the attributes of a player /Casanova just what you say you want to avoid .... now if i were a woman I'd rather have a relationship with the tongue tied bumbling fool as long as it was me that made him that way .. thats the guy that will care for you when the chips are down ... but no ya'll swoon over the slick tongue / hand of a guy depicting a fictitious date with himself a self proclaimed bar browser .... Go figure | |
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| In looking for a relationship on POF, have you run into this before?
Posted: 10/10/2007 6:29:25 AM | I didn't read this fella's creative short story, so it might have been an eloquent piece of work... but I always sneer like Elvis when I see a writeup like that. It's usually all posturing and emotional flexing. The verbal equivalent of flashing your abs. A good writer , a good person really, looking for love doesn't need to proclaim just how awesome and romantic and caring they are via a series of well chosen verbs and adjectives. One should just be able to tell.
When someone goes and scribbles down a "scenario" to demonstrate just how dreamy a night out with them would be... not only do I think "player" but I also think "manipulative b@stard." Heck... I write. I'm a writer. But when it comes to showing someone what kind of person I am... I refuse to lean back on cheap tricks.
It's sweet and as a human being it made my heart ache a little to hear that you cried after reading what this fella wrote... it shows a lot about you as far as how in need of romantic love you are. Just... guard your heart there, okay? | |
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| In looking for a relationship on POF, have you run into this before?
Posted: 10/10/2007 6:39:47 AM | It is great to see someone who has great writing skills. Though I do know from experience that being able to write about things, doesn't necessarily the person actually does those things.
I have met a guy who was great at writing, but in real life could not carry on a conversation and definitely was not like what he had written. | |
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| everyone is unique
Posted: 10/10/2007 6:43:48 AM | I used to change my profile description every week even the language that I used from French to English.
I don't think someone crying over an emotional tear-jerker is indicative of an imbalance. for instance, I often like to read books and if it brings tears to my eyes that book is that much better written while at the same time I dislike it. if you want something disturbing about real-life events, watch robert fisk's beirut to bosnia documentary. reading about the firefighter saving a child at the last minute is sweet as well as reading about heroic stories in the newspaper
I consider myself a good writer and it does help to correspond with others but after exchanging emails for weeks, it rarely led anywhere.
now that i have finally met someone and get along well, we never did write many emails, just a quick meeting, then lots of phone calls and weekend visits. I don't think it is your writing ability that keeps someone close, more your conversation skills andputting them at ease as everyone has concerns about their day to day job
it's too bad you can't write about others or tell us his profile name then we could judge. when i read things like "i'll take you to the mall so I can buy you clothes and then ride in my sports car" I think someone is trying too hard but hey I think you have to give some people the benefit of doubt and hope there are decent sincere men out there | |
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| In looking for a relationship on POF, have you run into this before?
Posted: 10/10/2007 6:48:33 AM |
When someone goes and scribbles down a "scenario" to demonstrate just how dreamy a night out with them would be... not only do I think "player" but I also think "manipulative b@stard." Heck... I write. I'm a writer. But when it comes to showing someone what kind of person I am... I refuse to lean back on cheap tricks.
I disagree with you. First of all most profiles are so trite, so ridiculously poor written and cliche that reading them is like watching paint peal of a wall. I am to the point that when I start reading and all I see is this crap, I click off, and move on to someone else. So with that said, and hearing that the women have the same problem, why do I want to do the same? No. So describe your self like one more moron in this place. Please. Who cares, write something that captures her imagination, that takes her to a place that would make her feel what it is to be with you. Just don't make it sound like Casanova at work, but you. | |
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| In looking for a relationship on POF, have you run into this before?
Posted: 10/10/2007 6:49:50 AM | yea.... jtw1974 ... think i'll save the drama for the theater or read a novel if i need some ... we are constantly bombarded by women proclaiming their hate for these kind of things . but let one of the silver tongue players ... write a seductive profile and all these women turn to jello... people looking for a mate think about what they want in such mate .... people looking for a piece of tail think about what they can say that the object of their desire wants to hear...ie from a womans point of view...
(from a female perspective no less)
makes me wonder more and more if there isn't some validity to all the nice guy threads ....women want the fairy tale ..but fairy tales are fiction .... reality is rougher around the edges but a lot more fulfilling... the problem with kissing princes is they usually turn into frogs or pond scum.... fairy tales usually just want a piece of tail | |
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| In looking for a relationship on POF, have you run into this before?
Posted: 10/10/2007 7:56:20 AM |
I disagree with you. First of all most profiles are so trite, so ridiculously poor written and cliche that reading them is like watching paint peal of a wall. I am to the point that when I start reading and all I see is this crap, I click off, and move on to someone else. So with that said, and hearing that the women have the same problem, why do I want to do the same? No. So describe your self like one more moron in this place. Please. Who cares, write something that captures her imagination, that takes her to a place that would make her feel what it is to be with you. Just don't make it sound like Casanova at work, but you.
I'm with ya, man... but that's not what I'm saying here. Sure... who wants to read "I'm looking for Mr Wright (hee hee) and just a really nice guy that can appreciate the 'real' me..." etc etc etc... BLAH. Boring comes across in a profile... hell yes. But a little humor, a little honesty and a lil' sexy can take someone a loooong way. But to take it to the point of writing a creative essay on how you are the ideal date or whatever?
In most cases, I just feel that's smarmy. | |
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| In looking for a relationship on POF, have you run into this before?
Posted: 10/10/2007 7:59:30 AM | | Since I've had my surgery and have healed..I look just like Fabio..and would love to take you on a ride on the roller coaster of love blocking the seagulls for my little vixen, and then covering her in "i cant believe its not butter" while listening to you heart thrust with every touch. | |
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| In looking for a relationship on POF, have you run into this before?
Posted: 10/10/2007 8:05:46 AM |
But to take it to the point of writing a creative essay on how you are the ideal date or whatever? In most cases, I just feel that's smarmy.
Sometimes it IS smarmy - it is very hard to do well. A great writer tho' can demonstrate who they are rather than tell who they are. And that's HOT! | |
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| In looking for a relationship on POF, have you run into this before?
Posted: 10/10/2007 8:35:06 AM | Winter Sparkle - 
I've writen creative profiles, re-written them several times to varying degrees of creativity, I've sent creative emails, sometimes long, sometimes short, always referring to something in her profile to make sure she knows I actually read it, etc. etc. etc. pp. ad nauseam ad infinitum, and so forth and so on.
Result: If they're the complete opposite of what I'm looking for and like the picture, they'll write to me first.
If not - the silence of the grave.
I no longer bother writing anything. | |
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| In looking for a relationship on POF, have you run into this before?
Posted: 10/10/2007 9:37:21 AM |
A great writer tho' can demonstrate who they are rather than tell who they are. And that's HOT!
a great writer can dimonstrate who they want you to think they are or who they percieve themselves to be ... but then you get to know reality and it sucks | |
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| In looking for a relationship on POF, have you run into this before?
Posted: 10/10/2007 10:19:49 AM |
a great writer can dimonstrate who they want you to think they are or who they percieve themselves to be ... but then you get to know reality and it sucks
I believe in show, don't tell. If all you do is say, I am great at this that and the other. Who gives a fvck. Actually I hate that on women's profiles. Particularly when they star like My friends say I am blah, blah, blah.
Actually, I have read a couple of women's profiles that were really cool. One because see seemed to be so angry that it was funny, daring to email her and have your head bitten off. The other ones sounded like they too were sick of the cliches and had something different in them. | |
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