Plentyoffish dating forums are a place to meet singles and get dating advice or share dating experiences etc. Hopefully you will all have fun meeting singles and try out this online dating thing... Remember that we are the largest free online dating service, so you will never have to pay a dime to meet your soulmate.
     
Show ALL Forums  > Ask A Girl  > How do you tell is a woman is player.      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 Rain57
Joined: 9/20/2006
Msg: 1
How do you tell is a woman is player.Page 1 of 2    (1, 2)
I've ran into so many women on here that say they are " single "...but come to find out they've been sleepin with someone the entire time. Maybe I'm old fashioned, BUT, I don't think you can be single and be sleeping with someone.

An then there's the " String-along-Headtrippin-Natzis".....these are the women that'll continueously make dates then back out at the last minute....One lady cancelled out on me 3 times over a 4 month period.....the second time we were suppose to go out we planned it 5 weeks in advance, and still, she backed out..And she never rally gave me a reason. Except, " Its a long weekend".

So, if anyone can give me any insight as to detecting the " players" it'd be much appreciated.

thanx
 kungfuguitarist
Joined: 7/31/2007
Msg: 2
How do you tell is a woman is player.
Posted: 10/18/2007 1:27:11 PM
An then there's the " String-along-Headtrippin-Natzis".....these are the women that'll continueously make dates then back out at the last minute....One lady cancelled out on me 3 times over a 4 month period.....the second time we were suppose to go out we planned it 5 weeks in advance, and still, she backed out..And she never rally gave me a reason. Except, " Its a long weekend

The answer to your question about detecting female players is: stop being a pu$$y. After she canceled the first date you should have moved on with your dating life, while still leaving the opportunity open for her to make a 2nd date with you.
 flotsam
Joined: 1/20/2007
Msg: 3
How do you tell is a woman is player.
Posted: 10/18/2007 1:29:31 PM
She says ALL the right things.
 WomanInProgress
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 4
view profile
History
How do you tell is a woman is player.
Posted: 10/18/2007 1:31:45 PM

I've ran into so many women on here that say they are " single "...but come to find out they've been sleepin with someone the entire time. Maybe I'm old fashioned, BUT, I don't think you can be single and be sleeping with someone.

I'll take this one.

Yes, as a matter of fact you can be single and sleeping with whoever you choose, which is why single and celibate don't mean the same thing. Sex does not take you off the market...between relationships what are people supposed to do, take up knitting? Trust me, MANY men are single and have full sex lives - women are within their rights to do the same.
 single_lookin850
Joined: 8/20/2007
Msg: 5
view profile
History
How do you tell is a woman is player.
Posted: 10/18/2007 3:00:01 PM
OP your profile says you are only on here for friendship, so what gives why are you worried about the women having sex with someone else when you stated that you are only for the friendship? Mix signals maybe?
 life_of_leisure
Joined: 1/4/2007
Msg: 6
view profile
History
How do you tell is a woman is player.
Posted: 10/18/2007 3:01:46 PM
> How do you tell is a woman is player.

If she wants to go on anything remotely resembling a date.
 nogo3
Joined: 2/26/2007
Msg: 7
How do you tell is a woman is player.
Posted: 10/18/2007 3:12:06 PM
my own opinion is if they don't walk the talk they are playing ya. and that goes both ways.
 whiteknightgb
Joined: 7/10/2007
Msg: 8
view profile
History
How do you tell is a woman is player.
Posted: 10/18/2007 3:14:37 PM
well if she has a soccer shirt , soccer shorts and soccer boots then she is a soccer player
 wpg_chick_84
Joined: 1/23/2006
Msg: 9
How do you tell is a woman is player.
Posted: 10/18/2007 4:45:22 PM
A lot of people are of the opinion that sex does not mean you're in a relationship. Most people are not exclusive until they have 'the talk'. Just because you don't agree doesn't mean you're wrong and they're right or vice versa, because what's right in a relationship varies from person to person, nor does this make you old fashioned (because there are quite a few people out there who think that once you have sex you're exclusive, or who won't have sex until 'the talk'). If it makes you uncomfortable say something.
 Rain57
Joined: 9/20/2006
Msg: 10
How do you tell if a woman is player.
Posted: 10/20/2007 12:05:43 PM
Ok, I've never really though about it that way. " Being single is not the same as being celibate." Good point.


But, being in a "sexual-relationship" do you still promote yourself as being single?
 Icene
Joined: 6/26/2007
Msg: 11
How do you tell if a woman is player.
Posted: 10/20/2007 12:21:49 PM

But, being in a "sexual-relationship" do you still promote yourself as being single?


Personally, I don't see having sex as a 'relationship' but I do believe you are single until you settle down with one person. Until that point you're just dating.

Every woman is different, but I don't date several men and have sex with one of the daters at the same time.

There have been times when I was having sex with someone once a month or so and still looking for a boyfriend. I saw myself as single because the person I was having sex with wasn't a relationship in my eyes.

Once I actually met a guy I liked enough to go on a second date with, I stopped having sex with the first guy and devoted my attentions towards the guy I wanted a relationship with. If the guy I was starting to date asked me when I had sex last, I was honest.
 11thhour
Joined: 9/23/2007
Msg: 12
How do you tell if a woman is player.
Posted: 10/20/2007 12:22:50 PM
But, being in a "sexual-relationship" do you still promote yourself as being single?


I "promote myself" as single unless and until there's a MUTUAL agreement between me and the man (either verbally or tacitly understood) that we are exclusive.
 Rain57
Joined: 9/20/2006
Msg: 13
How do you tell if a woman is player.
Posted: 10/20/2007 12:40:12 PM
WOW, this is interesting, I'm learning alot....

Ok, I hope I don't ( or haven't ) stirred up a hornets nest here......BUT you can be with someone in the most intimate way, BUT, you're still single untill you have the " talk "

That that seems to be a very thin-line between being single and and being an not being single..
 11thhour
Joined: 9/23/2007
Msg: 14
How do you tell if a woman is player.
Posted: 10/20/2007 2:52:03 PM
^^^I really think that what it all boils down to is self preservation and protecting the heart. It IS a very thin line...but it's one that EVERYONE walks when they become intimate (emotionally or physically) with another person.

I don't have sex with more than one person at a time. In fact, I don't really even like DATING more than one person at a time...and I don't have sex with a man just because I'm dating him (complicated, huh?) If there is enough mutual attraction and respect between us, and if we have already spent a good deal of time together and the decision is mutual...there will be a sexual relationship, but, until there is a distinct and honest show of committment from him...no matter how much of myself I give to him, I always make room for the possiblity that he isn't in it for the long haul...and I therefore consider myself free to make another choice...which is what being single is. When you're NOT single...there's a relationship to break off. If there's no committment on both sides, an exclusive relationship doesn't exist.
 taray_queen
Joined: 6/8/2007
Msg: 15
How do you tell is a woman is player.
Posted: 10/20/2007 3:23:31 PM
You can tell that a woman is a player by knowing how a male player acts. They are identical, like the peppermint twins.
 jewelescent
Joined: 3/2/2007
Msg: 16
How do you tell is a woman is player.
Posted: 10/20/2007 5:49:08 PM
Well maybe the guy she's sleeping with is just a FWB or FB. I would claim single if i am sleeping with someone and we arent dating or we havent decided to be exclusive. Guys do it too.
 WomanInProgress
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 17
view profile
History
How do you tell is a woman is player.
Posted: 10/21/2007 8:33:11 AM
But, being in a "sexual-relationship" do you still promote yourself as being single?

I am single unless married or in a serious relationship. No promotion needed.

Ok, I hope I don't ( or haven't ) stirred up a hornets nest here......BUT you can be with someone in the most intimate way, BUT, you're still single untill you have the " talk "
That that seems to be a very thin-line between being single and and being an not being single..

There's no talk or possible relationship with that person (if there was, they wouldn't still be single, right?). It's just a means of sex...not sure what you mean by this. You CAN be sleeping with someone you have no intention of considering for anything else, while dating and being open to finding someone you can consider seriously. People do it all the time.

 sherilyn70
Joined: 1/26/2007
Msg: 18
How do you tell if a woman is player.
Posted: 10/21/2007 9:11:03 AM

But, being in a "sexual-relationship" do you still promote yourself as being single?


Yes, if both partners in that "relationship" are out there dating and looking for their match then you are definitely still single. Just because you have a friend you have sex with doesn't mean they're even remotely the person you want to date or have a long term relationship with. This is called friends with benefits.
 Rain57
Joined: 9/20/2006
Msg: 19
How do you tell if a woman is player.
Posted: 10/21/2007 1:16:13 PM
The only thing I've read here that has any real substance is what 11thhour said Protecting the Heart "...

Everything else is a " cop-out" Single until the "TALK".....thats the biggest "cop-out" I've heard yet... The only thing thats separating you form being single and not being is a "TALK"

The definition of " RELATIONSHIP" is the way in which two people or things are related.....HENCE; if you have a friend with benifits you're in a " sexual-relationship"....PLAIN AND SIMPLE!!!! Claiming to be single when you DO have someone in you life, is MISLAEADING.

I think they chould really think about changing the name of this site to " The Player's Club"
 cupatea2010
Joined: 7/30/2007
Msg: 20
view profile
History
How do you tell is a woman is player.
Posted: 10/21/2007 1:24:24 PM
String-along-Headtrippin-Natzis...wow..whata phrase..what happened to just plain ol..Bi^ches?
 Icene
Joined: 6/26/2007
Msg: 21
How do you tell if a woman is player.
Posted: 10/21/2007 1:52:35 PM
It's called a difference of opinion Rain. If you don't want answers, then don't ask questions. Find the girl who agrees with your definition of relationship and perhaps you have found who you're looking for. Good luck to you.
 irish girl in mi
Joined: 7/15/2007
Msg: 22
How do you tell is a woman is player.
Posted: 10/21/2007 4:10:02 PM
[I've ran into so many women on here that say they are " single "...but come to find out they've been sleepin with someone the entire time. Maybe I'm old fashioned, BUT, I don't think you can be single and be sleeping with someone]

just so you know.....sex does not put you in a relationship, I have had the same sex partner for a year and a half, we are not dating, and outside of having sex together a couple times a week, we dont talk or see each. It has worked for both of us for the being, but I am looking for something long-term and more complete now, and once I find it, I will let him go. But I am a normal woman with a healthy sex drive and no boyfriend, so my partner is just fulfilling a need.
 talked.into.it
Joined: 6/26/2007
Msg: 23
How do you tell is a woman is player.
Posted: 10/21/2007 5:25:43 PM
I think a lot of women have a fear of being alone and they always need someone there. I wouldn't call them a player unless you made it clear to eachother that you only wanted to see eachother and no one else. It's not that hard to find a woman who isn't interested in just sex. Look at the profiles. If it specifically says that the woman isnt looking for intimate encounters then she probably isnt.
 I did it!!
Joined: 5/21/2007
Msg: 24
How do you tell is a woman is player.
Posted: 10/21/2007 6:06:57 PM
well op...since I am played most of the time, you woud figure I would have all the right answers and would put a stop to it...lmao...but it still happens...even on here...hard to really tell sometimes..you tried to think otherwise...but the sings just keep appearing...sorry, not much help!!
 WomanInProgress
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 25
view profile
History
How do you tell is a woman is player.
Posted: 10/21/2007 6:22:50 PM

The only thing I've read here that has any real substance is what 11thhour said Protecting the Heart "...
Everything else is a " cop-out" Single until the "TALK".....thats the biggest "cop-out" I've heard yet... The only thing thats separating you form being single and not being is a "TALK"

I have no idea where you're getting this talk stuff from in this context...I mean, if you're dating and both people don't agree on wanting to see no one else, then you have a situation where both don't want to be that serious. Unless and until they both say YES I want no one but you why would you assume it? That's looking to get your feelings hurt should the other person still be dating.

The definition of " RELATIONSHIP" is the way in which two people or things are related.....HENCE; if you have a friend with benifits you're in a " sexual-relationship"....PLAIN AND SIMPLE!!!! Claiming to be single when you DO have someone in you life, is MISLAEADING.

Sex is commonly separated from a relationship when there isn't one there. One doesn't necessarily have to come with the other. Oh, and getting laid when you need to and having someone in your life are far from the same thing. Ask some of your male friends, they'll tell you - I'm sure they've been doing this for years. Heck, ask some of the men here online...many here do the same, and have posted about it and/or supported it.

I think they chould really think about changing the name of this site to " The Player's Club"

They can't be players if they are single, there's no one to play.

You say that like it's not happening offline too...it's what some people do when not involved...and it's their business if that's what they want to do. What people do before they meet you is really none of your business until you become involved, so long as it's not illegal or a health risk.

Keeping your sex life while looking for someone you want the whole enchilada with is not only doable, it's smart. You take all the sexual pressure off a new love interest - honestly, how many threads have there been here about sleeping with someone you liked too soon and ruining it? This solves that problem.

This has been going on for years, basically you're just catching on to it.
Show ALL Forums  > Ask A Girl  > How do you tell is a woman is player.