| How much does a woman's financial situation mean to you?
Posted: 10/28/2007 5:45:42 PM | Many men don't realize that women have pride when it comes to being self sufficient and able to support themselves, specially if they are older independent women. The two sexes really are not that different!
Like many men, we can hide how good/bad our financial situation really is. Like men we can also look like we are better off than we truly are (women are probably better at doing this than men). Many single moms are living well below the poverty line, but most people have no idea of that. Many do it so well that they can often even look like they are not only doing fine, but very well.
If you have a good job, security, etc.. what would you expect her to be able to bring to the table, specially if she had a child?
My view on everything is that both parties need to bring similar stuff to the relationship. It may not be money, one may bring job stability, the other may bring income, one may bring knowledge to work with money, the other may bring the means of getting it..... Just how important is economics to you in a potential long term relationship???? At what point do you feel it is best to even discuss yours/their financial situation?
Thanks for your input.
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.Lisa
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Joined: 8/25/2007
Msg: 2 | |
| How much does a woman's financial situation mean to you?
Posted: 10/28/2007 6:39:41 PM | I've always been independent and supported myself and child since birth and I was and still am young. Mind you now I'm on student loan and p/t work cause I'm going to college. It depends on the person. You can always go down, but only a few do what it takes to get back up  | |
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| How much does a woman's financial situation mean to you?
Posted: 10/28/2007 6:47:24 PM | This is simple (to me anyways).
Any materialistic attributes, be it money, a house, car(s), or other nice things one might have can be taken away *snap* just like that, even a job/career.
Finances don't mean $h!t to me period. There are way more important things that hold a relationship together than what you have gathered material wise in ones life.
Subtract all things material and then ask what's important. | |
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| How much does a woman's financial situation mean to you?
Posted: 10/28/2007 10:54:05 PM | People run from me, as I was forced into bankruptcy a few months ago, because of all the bills my ex left me. I tried to pay the bills, but when just 1 bill reached more then what I made in a month, it was a hopeless battle. I lost almost everything, including my health. So I got the only help I could find. Bankruptcy.
Thats why I dissapeard from the forums, as I was an active member. But once you know that bankruptcy is the only answer you have no reason to try to date as its not fair to the other person. & how do you explain to someone, I'm sorry you cannot come over as I have been homeless for 2 months & 90% of the things I own were stolen? My work friends couldn't grasp it, so I'm sure it would have been harder on a stranger.
But after all that excitement (not fun might I add lol) I've still come out on top (I always will, I'm a fighter). I live on my own, I own a car, love my job (had it for 2yrs), I'm educated, have loving friends that were by my side, so I'm doing alright...
Just need a guy who can understand I didn't take the lazy way out. They never let me explain how hard I tried to avoid it. They just call me lazy.
Oh well, been pretty much single for 2yrs, a little longer isn't gonna kill me  | |
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| How much does a woman's financial situation mean to you?
Posted: 10/29/2007 12:18:53 AM | Well I for one don't care what a woman own's or has in the bank .
I have always accepted a woman for who she was and nothing less!
Heck I have turned down more jobs that pay alot more per week then some of you make in a year. So its not what you have ladies that catches me ! Its You and you only that catches me. Yes I have read a few profiles and I see the ladies listing they own their home /drive a brand new car ,etc ,etc! Whoppy !!! Who cares what you own or have thats yours . If you want me show me you want me and show me your honesty/respect & yeah that you care & love me!! Thats the only things I am looking for and the only things that will catch me too!
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| How much does a woman's financial situation mean to you?
Posted: 10/29/2007 12:28:43 AM | My opinion is the same as the other guys. It doesn't matter what she has or how much she makes. It's who she is that I'm interested in.
I doubt you'll find many guys who put a high priority on those things when looking for a woman. | |
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| How much does a woman's financial situation mean to you?
Posted: 10/29/2007 4:48:48 AM | What if she 'appears' to have more material possessions ,than you, to put on the table? Would you feel offended.
Some men do not want to feel like the woman has more economically to bring to the relationship.
Just how much should that matter to a man? | |
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| How much does a woman's financial situation mean to you?
Posted: 10/29/2007 5:34:35 AM | As a woman, I'll have to agree with Kobestar:
Any materialistic attributes, be it money, a house, car(s), or other nice things one might have can be taken away *snap* just like that, even a job/career.
Finances don't mean $h!t to me period.
It never mattered to me when I had more, the guys seemed fine with it ( a couple of them too much so, lol), and it wouldn't matter to me if he has more, either. It's just simply not about "stuff". We all bring different things into a relationship, as you stated, but none more important than the intentions in our heart. Outside of that, I don't believe there should be a scale, IMO.
*C* | |
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| How much does a woman's financial situation mean to you?
Posted: 10/29/2007 6:32:11 AM | Well, I'll go against the grain here.
Before I were to get involved that deep with a woman (at my age), I would be observant about her attitude towards money. Meaning, if she "expects" money as opposed to "respect" money, chances are I would be gone pretty quick.
Those who lack respect for money and lack respect for the effort it takes to make money don't appreciate things such as a savings account, pension savings, education fund for the child(ren), high interest on late payments (credit cards)... the list can go on and on.
In the case of extended families....something has to be protected for the sake of my own children as opposed to loosing their (potential) inheritance in the case of a divorce. As I said before, those who don't respect money rarely care who they hurt during divorce.
Given the high rate of failed marriages (and common law marriages) and the attitudes in family court... financial security and protection has become a very important issue among men and women who were the breadwinners in past relationships. | |
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| How much does a woman's financial situation mean to you?
Posted: 10/29/2007 6:42:14 AM | | I have to disagree with most of the people on here. I think money is important. It is certainly not the most important aspect of my life but with it I can have the freedom to truly enjoy life. I can experience new things, learn about different cultures, have some of the things I enjoy, help people on a larger scale and spend real time with my family and friends. I find the people that say money doesn’t matter are often the people who constantly complain about not having enough when troubles come. As for how much money I would want my girl to have “the more the better”. But, I want a girl that has goals and is constantly driven to improve all areas of her life (not just financial). I would prefer if she was better off than I am because, perhaps I can learn something from her or maybe she can help me grow my net worth at a quicker pace. If she doesn’t have any money or assets I would try to get to know why, is it by choice, lack of knowledge or just an unexpected event. As far as bankruptcies go, some of the wealthiest people I know have had more bankruptcies than anyone one else. It’s almost necessary part of life when trying to escape the grips of poverty through business ventures. It builds character and teaches you what to do differently next time. In closing I would like to add that it is my opinion that life should be abundant in every aspect. It should be abundant in health, abundant in spirituality, abundant in the amount of love in your relationships, abundant in the happiness you feel everyday and yes it should definitely be abundant financially. If your life is not abundant in one of these areas perhaps you should work on them and model the people who have abundance in them. Just a young mans crazy thought. Wishing everyone a very profitable day, Damian. | |
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| How much does a woman's financial situation mean to you?
Posted: 10/29/2007 6:52:06 AM | | A womans financial situation means nothing to me and it never has. It never mattered to me if she was making $20 000 or $100 000 per year, it's more about who she is as a person that's important. | |
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| How much does a woman's financial situation mean to you?
Posted: 10/29/2007 7:31:12 AM | The only real thing that really matters to any guy and I will repeat any guy is !
That the lady is someone he loves to be with and whom he can accept her for just her.
And also she is someone who also loves him for him and whom can accept him for him.
And when your talking about love it has no financial back ground and needs none either.
Oh heck yes some only look for money side in a relationship and those people are better known as Takers! Meaning if you don't make lots your not datin me !
And those types are never happy and never will be! | |
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| How much does a woman's financial situation mean to you?
Posted: 10/29/2007 7:40:58 AM | | A woman's financial situation has some meaning . But it doesn't matter how much she makes , but it shows us how well she wants to progress in life ... Most woman tend to work longer hours to produce more then some men . Guaranteed to live a well rounded lifestyle.They want to have a financial future something they work for . Even so bright woman make mistakes as well as us men .Never stick your head in the sand that your the one guaranteed to live happily ever after. But at the same time it like security that keeps us going ..... | |
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| How much does a woman's financial situation mean to you?
Posted: 10/29/2007 7:54:30 AM | I'll belatedly preface my original comment with this:
she "expects" money as opposed to "respect" money
Paraphrase 'he' for 'she' in a woman's case...someone who is reckless and careless with their money is a financial disaster waiting to happen, no matter how much or how little they originally bring into the relationship.
Even with the best protective measures in place, sometimes we still have to give up (unfairly, IMO, I might add) things we had prior to meeting the "future ex". I trust we all would have weeded those types out to the best of our ability, while still in the dating stage.
*C* (mietzele)
I think a belated preface is called an edit...geesh I'm verbose at times | |
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| How much does a woman's financial situation mean to you?
Posted: 10/29/2007 8:50:18 AM |
someone who is reckless and careless with their money is a financial disaster waiting to happen, no matter how much or how little they originally bring into the relationship
I agree.
For clarity purposes, I would like to emphasise that I mentioned "she" simply because of the thread title. There are guys I know of who are no better in this respect. In fact, I look poorly upon guys who are bilking money from single mothers - they need their ass kicked... very hard.
At my age, if my potemntial mate is not grown up enough to realise how important cash flow and savings are, I don't think I want to get involved with them.
"Help out" rather than becoming a liability. | |
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| How much does a woman's financial situation mean to you?
Posted: 10/29/2007 9:04:52 AM | My thoughts on money.
Money does not bring happiness.
My family comes first.
I make money to pay bills and some extra.
If I was filthy rich, I would be volunteering my time where there is a lot of need and using that money to help others. I hate dust collectors in the home, and where Christmas is often overated how much is spent on the kids. I pay my bills on time, I do eat out on occasion, I do splurge on occasion on things like roller blades, hockey equipment and the like for things that give back. I know how to budget and save. Not all do. | |
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| How much does a woman's financial situation mean to you?
Posted: 10/29/2007 9:58:53 AM | It depends on if its her round or not.
Does it really matter well to some yes to others no.
Without starting another gender war its how she looks and acts around me. If Im attracted to her and we get on I dont care if she is stacking shelves at the Dollar Store or wearing the business power suit and making 6 figures plus. | |
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| How much does a woman's financial situation mean to you?
Posted: 10/29/2007 10:15:34 AM | I have to agree with My I.. it's not the things/assets they have, it's more what it took for them to get them, and keep them.
My best friend (who is the same age as me) is an absolute disaster with money, lives paycheck to paycheck, frequently uses the payday advance places and pretty much owns nothing. He is now involved with a girl that has less money sense than him.... only works 3 nights a week, and doesn't even have her HS diploma. I just shake my head when they start talking of their future together and what kind of an apt they might be able to afford. No drive for anything between the two of them.
I just can't imagine living like that.
It's your drive and sense that will attract and keep someone if money is thier issue.
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| How much does a woman's financial situation mean to you?
Posted: 10/29/2007 11:40:44 AM | | Stability and security along with a good sense of independance should be on both sides of the relationship. Life is way too hard and expensive to carry someone through life. They should be able to at least hold up their side of the responsilility if the relationship was to include marriage or living together! | |
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| How much does a woman's financial situation mean to you?
Posted: 10/29/2007 1:41:15 PM | i just personally wouldn't want her to be on welfare and NOT trying to improve her situation...
i mean i understand that some people need social services, and are making an effort to change their lot in life, but to stay on the dool and do nothing? that's a pretty indicator of her personality i would think... | |
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| How much does a woman's financial situation mean to you?
Posted: 10/29/2007 2:33:12 PM | | I agree with Kobes , I could careless for Material assets that can always be replaced ...feelings or the time spent with someone cant be replaced ... to many shallow people on this rock and this site ... so my answer is simple , a womens financial situation means shit to me . Life has more vaule to me then Money ever will | |
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| How much does a woman's financial situation mean to you?
Posted: 11/16/2007 9:33:14 PM |
Subtract all things material and then ask what's important.
Better yet ... take away ALL material things and see if you still have
a relationship ... flood, fire and other disasters can happen, people
lose limbs, become disabled, have life-threatening illnesses, etc and
those are the times when a relationship makes or breaks. | |
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| How much does a woman's financial situation mean to you?
Posted: 11/16/2007 10:02:21 PM |
Better yet ... take away ALL material things and see if you still have
a relationship ... flood, fire and other disasters can happen, people
lose limbs, become disabled, have life-threatening illnesses, etc and
those are the times when a relationship makes or breaks
Interestingly, finances is the leading cause for divorce..... go figure. | |
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