| Define Casual Dating?
Posted: 11/2/2007 12:12:58 AM | For sure, everyone heard this question before. I'm curious how you define "casual dating". Everyone has their own opinion about it. Now, I'm confused.... Your input is appreciated!
-What is casual dating for you?
-What does it involves?
-What is your experience? | |
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| Define Casual Dating?
Posted: 11/2/2007 12:36:03 AM | | fa1th, I take my casual dating or whatever ...as well as laughter and light-hearted love seriously. Casual dating is pure pretentiousness in this regard. Don't waste my time or yours thinking that small talk on an ongoing basis is going to win either of us for what we both want and need to be involved for the doing and beyond. I'd enough for casual dating that this idea of PC had me looking beyond the immediate locale to find just who and what I was ISO beyond the convenient commute as well. No regrets for the not-so casual BS. | |
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| Define Casual Dating?
Posted: 11/2/2007 1:16:55 AM | | Casual dating... going with someone until something better pops up pretty much sums it up for me | |
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| Define Casual Dating?
Posted: 11/2/2007 3:32:09 AM | | I am going out with people - until I find the one. Beats the hell out of watching TV. | |
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| Define Casual Dating?
Posted: 11/2/2007 4:23:46 AM | -What is casual dating for you?
dating around (which doesnt include sleeping around) in order to satisfy that need for male companionship, as well as possibly finding someone to be monogamous with.
-What does it involves?
going out, having fun, getting to know each other... whatever the ppl involved agree upon.
-What is your experience?
its fun. as long as its done right. i find the NOT sleeping with all your dates is the key. date around but maybe sleep with the one you like best but thats about it. and being honest. making sure they know that sleeping around isnt what you're after, and making sure they understand that they're not the only one you're going out on dates with. and of course, if you DO choose to sleep with one of them, make sure there's an understanding of whether or not its exclusive sex, even if its not an exclusive relationship... ya know?
geez this dating thing is complicated.
why am i here?  | |
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| Define Casual Dating?
Posted: 11/2/2007 4:25:22 AM | | Casual dating is such a crazy word. I mean if you meet someone and you think that they might be the one then it's really not all that casual. If you don't think they are the one and still going out them then that's usually called Friends or Friends with Benefits. I've always laughed at the word casual dating. | |
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| Define Casual Dating?
Posted: 11/2/2007 5:04:30 AM | | dating is for teenagers ...or players... once a person becomes in the market for a relationship just dating is not possible ... grown ups either have relationships or shag buddies... what i dont understand is just dating is accepted but intimate encounter is not ... and it is my contention that if one is sexually active they are one in the same and if dating does not involve sex well its just going out with friends ... just dating does not exist either you are sleeping around or just going out with friends or being a tease... or using someone for entertainment or other gain ... or to fill some need but your still using...if your not giving something your using | |
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| Define Casual Dating?
Posted: 11/2/2007 5:07:45 AM | casual dating for me is goin out with guys but not sleepin with any of them , just dates really.
Its somethin i have done and will do again.
I make no promises and these relationships hang loose so i dont tell lies ut i dont reveal either simply cos it never crops up.
I agree its like waitin for better in a way but in mean time just havin a laugh. | |
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| Define Casual Dating?
Posted: 11/2/2007 5:42:13 AM | casual dating for me is goin out with guys but not sleepin with any of them , just dates really.
Its somethin i have done and will do again.
I make no promises and these relationships hang loose so i dont tell lies ut i dont reveal either simply cos it never crops up.
I agree its like waitin for better in a way but in mean time just havin a laugh.
as a guy why would i want to take you out spend my time and money on you?
a; i want a relationship with you
b; i want sex with you
c; i consider you my friend and just want to hang out with you ( in this case you should insist that we share expenses for the outings as do friends of the same sex)
i maintain that even though you may not say that you want either a; or b; with the guy if you are not direct in saying that neither one is a possibility then you are implying that that such possibility exist and again are using the guy.. and you are disregarding his feelings unless you make sure he understands that no possibility of either a; or b; exist and i maintain if both parties understand this and still want to go out then you are just friends and you should not accept any special treatment because of your gender... without the possibility of one of these you are just one of the guys and should act as such.....If you do this you are cool but it is not being done very much... in most cases of just dating one is the user and the other is Cathy's clown | |
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| Define Casual Dating?
Posted: 11/2/2007 7:02:53 AM | Casual Dating Examples:
1. Someone gives me a pair of tickets to a Leafs game for tomorrow night. I could call a buddy, but then I bump into that friendly, good looking woman in Sales in the coffee room..the truth is her perfume and the way she walks always give me an erection, but I know I'm not going there, too complicated... but sure, I ask her if she wants to grab a bite after work tomorrow and catch the Leafs game, because at least I'll have an excellent fantasy and the other guys at work will always wonder if I'm nailing her, which is good gossip for everyone at the water cooler. She says yes, possibly for all the same reasons... we have a nice meal, gossip about people at work, and enjoy the game. (The Leafs of course lose, but they usually do, and who cares. Great seats.) A month or two after that, someone will give her a pair of tickets to the Symphony and she might ask me and I'll say yes and we'll have a nice meal, see the symphony. Maybe after one such function or after a few drinkypoos somewhere we might suck face or make out, but it won't be a big deal if we do. Eventually, one of us leaves the company or starts seeing someone seriously and we drift apart but always enjoy bumping into each other at trade shows or industry meetings, because the little bit of electricity between us is good fun, our little secret. And we're pals and peers now, so we trade career information that helps each other succeed.
2. My gang of pals usually go to the same bar once every few weeks for a few pops, some chatter, and maybe some general mischief involving buying drinks for pretty girls we have no chance with. One of the guys bumps into a cute woman he works with and she gravitates towards me and we hit it off. We date a few times, maybe it turns into a fling, maybe it doesn't. She meets a guy at some other company function, or I meet the waitress in the next example and we forget about each other. A year later I hear she married her boss after he got promoted and she is now a stay at home mom in Mexico City.
3. The bar or restaurant in or near the building where I work is where we usually go for a drink or lunch ...there's one waitress that I think is cute; she's a bit too friendly towards me for it to be just about her loving her work and we develop an easygoing form of personal banter that makes us friends, sort of, but it probably also has something to do with the way I tip. Either way, we learn about each other's lives outside the customer-waitstaff thing. At some point, she either breaks up with her boyfriend or needs a guy with a car to take her to a family obligation function like a cousin's wedding and she wants her parents to think she knows at least one stable, respectable man...she sort of asks me, I volunteer, she acts surprised and agrees...we have a good time and she realizes I'm a great guy to call now and then, which she does. Being seen with her attracts one or more similarly interesting women from her circle of friends (like George Costanza with the model), and that's when I find out if the waitress actually likes me or is just a flag of convenience. Que sera, sera...either way, I have fun and meet new people.
Casual dates are just that....casual...and are almost always "non-contact" or "incidental contact"....dates.
They are not relationships.
They do not follow schedules.
They do not create expectations or ties that bind.
They come and go.
They are good times.
They create fond memories. | |
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| Define Casual Dating?
Posted: 11/2/2007 7:45:14 AM | | to me whn someone says casual i think they mean sleeping around not for me | |
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| Define Casual Dating?
Posted: 11/2/2007 9:37:34 AM | | Mister Mann seems to have it down to a science...good post! | |
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| Define Casual Dating?
Posted: 11/2/2007 11:25:11 AM | Okay... so I think I get it.
Casual dating is something I do if I want a lot of free meals and entertainment with no emotional comitment to anyone. :) | |
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| Define Casual Dating?
Posted: 11/2/2007 11:28:46 AM | | Casual dating, is simply dating thats not serious... I like to "Causally date" to see if I'll click well with the guy or not. I don't want to jump into something serious automatically. | |
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| Define Casual Dating?
Posted: 11/2/2007 11:39:40 AM | | I don't consider one date with a person "dating". I consider that seeing if there is a match or not... and I usually know by the end of the first date. I guess it's just a matter of how you prefer your words to sound. I go out on a lot of first dates but I would not call it casual or anything of that nature. I am not going to stick around and waste my time with somoene that doesn't have anything to offer me in the long term. | |
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| Define Casual Dating?
Posted: 11/2/2007 12:01:08 PM | For me it means going out with one or more ladies at a time without any sort of commitment or understanding with any of them. Sex may or may not be involved with any or all of them according to my definition. This term also implies that the relationship is not long-term or exclusive.
Personally I have nothing against casual dating for activities in which we share a common interest, but I do not engage in casual sex. In other words, I prefer not to have sex unless we have agreed that the sexual part of our relationship is exclusive for both of us. I would only make such an agreement if I believed the relationship had the potential to become long-term.
It is possible to have a defined relationship with one woman that involves commitments and sex, and still be casually dating other women. In my experience most women are not comfortable with this sort of arrangement. | |
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| Define Casual Dating?
Posted: 11/2/2007 3:38:19 PM | | lots of info to digest.... thx everyone for the input.. | |
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| Define Casual Dating?
Posted: 11/2/2007 4:45:28 PM | ...if your not giving something your using.
wow. and here i thought my company, and having a great night together instead of sitting home alone was enuff. geezus. no wonder so many guys try to hit us ladies up for sex on the first date. ( http://forums.plentyoffish.com/8417804datingPostpage5.aspx#8581313 )
unless that guy's not realizing that in this new millenium, women DO pay their own way. when i "date around" i never expect the guys to pay for the dates. lets get that straight right now. and if they do pay, i at least attempt to reciprocate (though the paying kind of guys never seem to allow that).
However, the nerve of some ppl to even suggest that if the man is paying, us ladies should "give something" in return. we're not hookers. flashing cash does not mean we're putting out. and if the man chooses to pay my way on the date, he does so knowing full well i aint puttin out in return. so where's the using? i'm being perfectly honest that i am dating around until, and unless i find someone compatible... and i am also being perfectly honest that dating around does not mean sleeping around. so... if thats using, i apologize. but its not going to make me hop into bed with every guy that takes me out on a date.
and as far as being a tease. someone needs to clue you in that going on a date doesnt mean you're getting lucky. hell, even monogamously dating you doesnt necessarily mean you're getting lucky... there's a whole host of ways for the relationship to end before sex even occurs.
so, if being choosey about the man i wish to be monogamous with, and NOT sleeping around in the meantime is considered using and being a tease, then so be it. i guess i'll continue to be a user and a tease until i find the MAN that understands self-respect, self-esteem, and the all important thing called dignity. i honour myself and my body... i would think that would be a good thing!  | |
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| Define Casual Dating?
Posted: 11/2/2007 5:30:06 PM | Y'all are missing this one...Casual dating is when you show up in a t-shirt and jeans.
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| Define Casual Dating?
Posted: 11/2/2007 5:30:39 PM | Casual dating means, I am not always picking up the bill,lol
Actually, to me it means your taking things quite slow and are dating other, usually without sex. More like a night out partner, then someone your truly considering wanting to commit too later on. | |
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| Define Casual Dating?
Posted: 11/2/2007 5:43:16 PM | Not being in love. Enjoying a man's company, being friends, hanging out and doing things together. That sort of thing. Just chillin. Whether or not it becomes intimate depends on if we think it could be more (or if we've had a bit too much to drink)  | |
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| Define Casual Dating?
Posted: 11/2/2007 10:06:51 PM |
Y'all are missing this one...Casual dating is when you show up in a t-shirt and jeans.
that's a good one!
what about if you decided to dress up? how do you call that??? | |
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