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 carrie5522
Joined: 11/18/2007
Msg: 1
Dating - What does it mean?Page 1 of 2    (1, 2)
Does dating mean something other than I think? I was chatting on line w/a guy who seemed nice. Fairly soon into us getting to know each other he asked me "the last time I was intimate?" After we met once for just an hour, he called a few hours later & asked for a date the next night, suggesting he come to my house or I come to his? I think I was stupid and just didn't pay close enuf to his profile where he said he was looking to date. Does date mean something other than 2 people going out somewhere together and getting to know each other or is it code for something else??
 MrVitamix
Joined: 8/26/2007
Msg: 2
Dating - What does it mean?
Posted: 11/30/2007 10:08:39 AM
dating means having fun... usually including sex. if you dont want to date maybe your wanting to be married where after the wedding, all sex with that person stops?

 Pamperpooch000
Joined: 11/7/2007
Msg: 3
Dating
Posted: 11/30/2007 10:08:55 AM
OP, it depends on what you told him about the last time you were intimate. If you gave him rhyme and verse just because he asked you, or if you told him to mind his own business untill he got to know you better, that could have a dramatic effect on the level of respect he initially felt for you. The thing is with dating, if a guy is fishing for information you don't want to give him, then he won't respect you for giving it. If anything he will see you as an easy target.
 MrVitamix
Joined: 8/26/2007
Msg: 4
Dating
Posted: 11/30/2007 10:12:30 AM
him asking that to me is asking how desperate she is. if she says long time ago, I'll figure she doesnt like sex or is playing games with me for free dinners... then again, she may be ready to have sex since its been so long... if she says last night, I might figure she likes sex and maybe she will have sex with me too. Its all about when he's getting some.
 ICUalways
Joined: 11/14/2007
Msg: 5
Dating - What does it mean?
Posted: 11/30/2007 10:46:43 AM

dating means having fun... usually including sex. if you don’t want to date maybe your wanting to be married where after the wedding, all sex with that person stops?


I believe that you are wrong with your definition of "Dating" but perhaps I live in the dark ages....

This is what I define as dating-

Getting out for drinks, coffee, the zoo, a movie, skating, or some other simple type of function that ONLY involves 2 people...... Minus the sex part.

Dating is two people spending time with each other "Feeling Out" if they have common ground to establish a long term relationship which will then INCLUDE sex.

"Seeking Friends" means exactly that... you want to hang out with a few people, and see if you like someone to see them on a dating level. (thus the theory of growing towards a real relationship)


Dating does NOT include sex in my book.


 MrVitamix
Joined: 8/26/2007
Msg: 6
Dating - What does it mean?
Posted: 11/30/2007 10:49:50 AM
since when does dating only involve 2 people, that to me sounds like you are talking about romantic encounters... which by the way usually end up with sex anyway.

dating means having fun, does not matter if your with one or 4 people. I've been on plenty of dates where we meet up with friends for the night. a few times I didn't even leave with the one I went with, this happens sometimes people find someone else to hook up with

dating is all about sex and finding sex partners. marriage is where you stop having sex with several people. dating is about sexual encounters, not getting married.
funny how all you women who have all these rules are usually the ones to want to have sex the first time meeting.... lol

without a sexual relationship ? whats the point of seeing a woman? there is none
 Pamperpooch000
Joined: 11/7/2007
Msg: 7
Dating - What does it mean?
Posted: 11/30/2007 12:21:46 PM

dating is all about sex and finding sex partners. marriage is where you stop having sex with several people. dating is about sexual encounters, not getting married.
funny how all you women who have all these rules are usually the ones to want to have sex the first time meeting.... lol

without a sexual relationship ? whats the point of seeing a woman? there is none


What a load of s****e. Dating is not all about finding sexual partners, or at least in my case it isn't. It's about dating,pure and simple, (that means you go on a date and you decide if you like one another, NOT! you go on a date and you feel duty bound to sleep with an idiot just because he's been gracious enough to ask you out on a date in the first place). I don't know where you get your ideas from, but I would imagine you'll be on here a long time with that attitude. Dating is about finding someone you eventually hope to settle with, not about sleeping with every horny dog who wants to get his leg over.
 OutMind
Joined: 2/13/2007
Msg: 8
Dating - What does it mean?
Posted: 11/30/2007 12:27:18 PM

Getting out for drinks, coffee, the zoo, a movie, skating, or some other simple type of function that ONLY involves 2 people...... Minus the sex part.


I am sorry, but I do not involve animals. Only two people, you and another one of your friends.

Hehehehe.

On a more serious note. Dating means non-exclusive. To some people it means without sex, to others with sex.
 Roving_Adventurer
Joined: 8/28/2007
Msg: 9
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History
Dating - What does it mean?
Posted: 11/30/2007 12:42:05 PM
Well I've heard at least four different definitions of dating. The only common thread is that they involve people going out. If you're just talking of the phone it's not dating. If you're living together it's no longer dating.
 carrie5522
Joined: 11/18/2007
Msg: 10
Dating - What does it mean?
Posted: 12/1/2007 10:14:52 AM
Wow, sounds like you had a bad experience post marriage. I want to date, but if that includes sleeping w/someone who wants sex without knowing my last name that's not for me. Is it for You?
 carrie5522
Joined: 11/18/2007
Msg: 11
Dating
Posted: 12/1/2007 10:15:59 AM
You're right and I was an easy target. When he asked me I told him and yes it's been a while so big lesson learned. I'm not an easy target and now I know what to look for. Thanks!!!!
 SunnyTexas
Joined: 9/28/2006
Msg: 12
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History
Dating
Posted: 12/1/2007 10:54:42 AM
I would prefer friendships. Going to fun places, doing fun things, each paying their own way, then...if more develops then the romantic dating scenario takes center stage, then....the coveted long term relationship.

When does the sex part fit in?.....hmmmm.....I dunno....somewhere between dating and long term or.... whenever respect and trust is established, I suppose. Or when the heat takes over. At that point...it's ALL OVER.

Not even back to friends. Ya done stepped off in it. Got it all over your boots.
 marbo6310
Joined: 6/10/2007
Msg: 13
Dating - What does it mean?
Posted: 12/1/2007 10:09:02 PM
Like OutMind said 'To some people it means without sex, to others with sex.' I think this is something to discuss between the two people involved and what 'dating' means to each of them. Personally, to me, dating is going out, dinner, movie, games, bowling, etc without sex.
 Marrying Kind
Joined: 10/3/2007
Msg: 14
Dating - What does it mean?
Posted: 12/1/2007 10:42:15 PM
DATING: you set up a time and place to meet before you are in a relationship.
 m409998m1
Joined: 2/18/2007
Msg: 15
Dating - What does it mean?
Posted: 12/1/2007 11:01:39 PM
OK maybe the word dating has many meanings. For instance, the first time you arrange a meeting with a potential significant other it’s called a date. Then if someone should ask of your single status, you might say, “I’m just dating”. Then again if you have been out with a guy a few times exclusively, you could say the two of you are dating. It’s not really rocket science. It’s more of an understanding and the hope of the individual you happen to be dating, has the same understand of the word.
In my personal understanding of the words definition, it’s a step towards a relationship, and a time to try others on and see if they fit.
 medana
Joined: 12/8/2005
Msg: 16
Dating - What does it mean?
Posted: 12/1/2007 11:17:02 PM
he is a slow poke with no dating manners, trust me, it happens all the time, thats why u click the 'next' button. guys that have no control over their hormones and are all about self gratification r at every corner. this one isn't smart enough to even do it right, he's like a 5yo trying to pass for a 9 grader

next
 100prcntMe
Joined: 10/1/2007
Msg: 17
Dating - What does it mean?
Posted: 12/2/2007 8:35:42 AM
To me, dating is that feeling out area where two people see each other and determine if the relationship which is being established has the merit to develop into a long termed relationship.

Dating may or may not include having sex, truly depends on the individuals involved.

I chose dating for my profile because my goal is to meet someone and develop a long termed relationship. Part of that process is to date someone, and see if that chemistry is there, and see what happens on a natural course.
 eazk
Joined: 9/8/2006
Msg: 18
Dating - What does it mean?
Posted: 12/2/2007 1:19:43 PM
Shhhhheeeeeeeeeeesssssshhhhhhhhhzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz...dating is SUPPOSED to include sex. Crap...wish somebody would have told me that...it could have saved me a lot of good releationships. Dayum.

 Montreal_Guy
Joined: 3/8/2004
Msg: 19
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History
Dating - What does it mean?
Posted: 12/2/2007 1:25:13 PM
A date is just two people getting to know one another, and I would exclude sex from that initial experience. People are very complex , and emotions are easy to succumb to.

I would say the only physical contact, at least in the earliest stages of that process, would be hugs and kisses.

OK, I realize that's pretty old school.

But again, so am I.
 trisha18
Joined: 6/7/2007
Msg: 20
Dating - What does it mean?
Posted: 12/2/2007 2:46:39 PM
Thats what i think dating is to meeting going and doing something like dinner, coffee and maybe a movie and getting to know each other.
 censport
Joined: 1/11/2009
Msg: 21
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Dating - What does it mean?
Posted: 1/23/2009 12:01:08 PM
[dating does NOT include sex in my book]
I am no expert but it is getting clearer to me the difference between the terms:
---LTR - Long Term Relationship
---Dating
---Friends
( There are other categories.. but these are the top 3 basic ones.)

SEX and Committment are the 2 variables here...

LTR .... includes dating leading to LTR if both feel it is working... and yes it presumes sex when the time is right for both.

Friends ..... includes spending time together... either in person or by phone etc... and definitely implies "no sex".

Dating..... this is NOT just friends ( no sex)..... and it is Not LTR where sex is assumed at some point.... DATING does in fact imply sex if in fact both people feel like they are ready... but YES sex is definitely assumed to be a strong possibility... not guaranteed.

I welcome comments...

Charlie
 mischief3178
Joined: 1/4/2009
Msg: 22
Dating - What does it mean?
Posted: 1/23/2009 12:18:30 PM
as far as i know dateing is you can see other people, untill your exclusive wich to some degree leads to marrage lol to where you don't have sex anymore so in that i agree with the last post...
 Confident-Realist
Joined: 2/8/2004
Msg: 23
Dating - What does it mean?
Posted: 1/23/2009 12:57:30 PM
There's variances on the definitions, and there's nothing wrong with that, but some people make it too askew. Some people call 'dating' the same as 'friends', which is silly as hell (dating means more than friends, duh). Some people call it 'dating' when they're 9 months into a relationship. I cringe at actually labeling someone as "just friends", because your cousin or sister-in-law is a friend. Your buddy's girlfriend is just a friend. I like calling a spade a spade. Here's my take on it, in 3 major phases:

(1) Pre-dating: Everything from getting a girl's # at the bar to the first few dates or hang-outs. You're not datING yet, as each progression is not known until there's a confirmation. You could have hooked up even, but again, it's not dating yet. You could be suspended in this state for a long time if you're both knowingly playing the field. This is when you're just hanging out, and you can't call the girl "your girl", unless it's only to a friend of yours who sees her across the room and he wants to chase her.

(2) Dating: You've had at least several dates, and are in the mode where you KNOW you'll see each other again in the very near future, without any mention of it. You're not meshing lives, but you're -consistently- hanging out and going out. Any tension has dropped, you're comfortable around each other, and there's an understood fidelity on some level at least, unless otherwise specified. With that said, though, it's not an emotional bombshell if one of the people ends up backing out.

(3) Relationship: You've been dating for a while, and this doesn't require long talks or writing out the 'ground rules'. Relationships develop by themselves from dating after a while (length of time varies; depends on people and situation). This is where your lives start to mesh and you see each other all the time, consistently.

You can start out as friends (not on purpose; otherwise you're fooling yourself) and then go into the pre-dating phase. Bottom line is if you're on this site, you're pre-dating -- ie, more than just friends 99.99% of the time.
 mcbobly
Joined: 8/28/2005
Msg: 24
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History
Dating - What does it mean?
Posted: 1/23/2009 3:09:40 PM
This is a great question, but since it has been so long for me going out on a date I guess I can't answer, so I will read others and hope I get some insight. Sure would be nice to know so I can go on one one day again..hehe.
 maybeangel
Joined: 3/18/2008
Msg: 25
Dating - What does it mean?
Posted: 1/23/2009 6:38:34 PM
I think that azureorb has some pretty good outlines.

Friends don't have sex.
Dating makes having sex a possibility.
Relationships might have "expectaions" of sex- so it is likely to be happening.

Dating means looking at possibilties.
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