| French kissing and sex...
Posted: 12/3/2007 11:50:13 PM | Ok, I did my thread search and didn't see this topic.
My bf will not participate in a French if sex is not to follow. Now I do agree that a good kiss can absolutely turn your crank, but do they ALL have to have sex as the end result? It's starting to irritate me. I really enjoy them, and I'd like to have a few more than I'm getting. But the only time I get one, is when he's 'in the mood', or is agreeable to be put 'in the mood' (meaning the time and place are sexually functional).
The question? Anybody else have this issue?
(my teeth are always spotless and my breath minty fresh. And I don't perform tonsillectomies...) | |
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| French kissing and sex...
Posted: 12/3/2007 11:54:35 PM | | Never heard of such a thing! Maybe it's his excuse to have good sex? lol Smart man | |
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| French kissing and sex...
Posted: 12/4/2007 1:03:45 AM | | I wish i could help more on this......My bf and I can french kiss and not have sex we just like to kiss each other just cause it feels good and sometimes we through a little french kissing in there too....sometimes if the mood is right then yes we do have sex......but i don't think french kissing has to lead to sex..... | |
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| French kissing and sex...
Posted: 12/4/2007 2:27:52 AM | Just my opinion...
Maybe it's because "French kissing" is the most SEXUAL of kisses.
For example...when he looks at her and has this warm, fuzzy feeling inside and is thinking "gosh...she's so adorable...I love being with her" and he gives her a nice, light kiss on the lips. It's more of a "showing affection" kind of kiss.
You rarely see couples tying the knot (weddings) and "French kissing" after saying "I do". That is a "I love you" kiss, "I wanna spend the rest of my life with you" kind of kiss, and not a "French kiss".
When there is "French kissing", the temperature in the room increases (if you know what I mean!), and it seems like sex will eventually follow (as soon as possible). Especially IF you are a couple (and you guys are).
Anyways...I'M SURE THIS DOESN'T APPLY TO ALL COUPLES!! (my opinion only!).
French kissing can be a major arousal...to me it's as good as oral sex.
Maybe this is why your boyfriend gets so aroused by the French kissing, that he just needs sex with you, and...right away!!
My 2 cents! | |
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| French kissing and sex...
Posted: 12/4/2007 3:18:50 AM | | WOW OP...I checked your profile because I thought you were really young.. What a shame that a grown man thinks this way. Certainly a French Kiss is very passionate and sexual, but it doesn't always have to lead to the act of sex itself.. Evidently he has some control issues. Not sure you'll win this one...at his age, I'd think he's rather set in his ways, but I wish you all the best. | |
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| French kissing and sex...
Posted: 12/4/2007 3:23:49 AM | Good God OP! Enlighten this man, immediately. 
Kissing is soooooooo highly under rated. Seriously~ it truly is. Or should I say, sadly~ it truly is. | |
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| French kissing and sex...
Posted: 12/4/2007 7:34:19 AM | i can't believe there is a man like this. i think kissing, especially good french kissing, is one of the most pleasuable experiences there is. i love to kiss anywhere, anytime. i love it. nothing better than a passionate french kiss to say hello or godbye or just because you are passing each other in the hall.
i find one of the nicest feelings is when your SO stops you and just gives you a nice 5 minute kiss, just because of nothing. makes you feel wanted and loved. 
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| French kissing and sex...
Posted: 12/4/2007 8:15:00 AM | | I've never had this issue...if I did I'd be upset...I love kissing, the deeper and more passionate the better and a deep passionate kiss doesn't have to lead to sex, it definitly can but doesn't have to. Sorry to hear your bf is being difficult...that's not cool. | |
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| French kissing and sex...
Posted: 12/4/2007 9:28:56 AM | | On those ultra rare ocassons where I actually DO get to participate in french kissing, I don't expect it to lead to sex. I love to do it for the sake of sharing some other form of intimacy with the person I am with, plus I just love kissing in general. | |
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| French kissing and sex...
Posted: 12/4/2007 9:40:59 AM | sounds like he is a bit selfish and self centered OP........throw out another line!!!! | |
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| French kissing and sex...
Posted: 12/4/2007 9:46:17 AM | I know, I know. It's an odd issue to have. This is the first time I've encountered this. He is a VERY passionate and loving man, but he's my age, for Pete's sake! I would expect him to be able to control his urges better by now.
I need those kisses. Besides. Sometimes it's nice to leave someone wanting a little bit more. It can boost the anticipation, and can make you sing in your 'naughty bits' each time you think of it for days..............
(oh no! This is not a 'throw him away' kinda thing. This, I'll work on. I just wanted to know if anyone else had encountered this, or just what you guys thought. Thanks!) | |
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| French kissing and sex...
Posted: 12/4/2007 9:56:22 AM | Thinking here.......thinking more........Maybe he is using "it" as a tool to get sex????....
Now there is a novel idea......using sex as a reward or punishment....lmao
How does it feel to have the "mood" word used on you? Could this possibly be like saying to him that you can not touch my body unless we are "going steady"? Or, if you want sex with me, we must be married or at least engaged????.....
This man has taken one of the most sensual things you can do with another person and reduced it to a bargaining chip......I wonder where he got that from?????.......
My suggestion.......do a self exam, and find out what you want out of a relationship, and how you will get your needs taken care of as you take care of theirs. Maybe you ought to try to have sex with him each and every time you stick your tongue down his throat........find out how he reacts...... 
Just my opinion......   | |
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| French kissing and sex...
Posted: 12/4/2007 9:58:16 AM | HOLY SMOKES BATMAN!
LOL sorry but I couldn't believe it. Not sure if I don't still have reservations about it, but I suspect there is all kinds out there.
The largest sex organ on the female human is between her ears, why wouldn't he want to start making love hours before the actual act? Leave for work, lay a toe curling kiss on her, get her thinking of sex all through the day, come home and be attacked....
Logical.. 
I don't get it.... | |
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| French kissing and sex...
Posted: 12/4/2007 10:12:24 AM | | I agree with »¤Cät§ëÿ매« sounds like some kind of control issue. It sounds like a strange way of thinking! I think one of the nicest things is being able to kiss your SO without being directed into a sex session - when all ya wanted was a kiss! | |
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| French kissing and sex...
Posted: 12/4/2007 1:22:45 PM | | ^^^^^-- Do you mean controlling as in he can't control his urges, or controlling as in exherting control over me? | |
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| French kissing and sex...
Posted: 12/4/2007 1:34:22 PM | Are you dating my ex-husband ...
He didn't want ANY sort of affection unless it was going to lead to sex. And I mean a hug or a kiss. If I even attempted anything halfway affectionate he accused me of "teasing" him ... 
He wasn't the sharpest pencil in the box though ... | |
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| French kissing and sex...
Posted: 12/4/2007 4:00:49 PM | | you guys have missed it completely. The guy has ED and by having this rule, it is his signal to take his medication so that he can perform. | |
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| French kissing and sex...
Posted: 12/4/2007 4:26:04 PM | Well, I actually did just finish discussing this with him. He said he had no idea what I was talking about - where did I get such a thought? So I guess this is his way of avoiding the issue, or he honestly hasn't been paying attention. Next time he does it, right then and there I'm going to jump up and shout "Aha! Now! Just then! You did it!" lol - bet it'll go over like a lead balloon..........
(and no, NOT an 'E.D.' medication issue) | |
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| French kissing and sex...
Posted: 12/4/2007 4:26:38 PM | This might be a stupid question but does he cuddle if you are watching television? It would make sense if this was when you were in public and if he feels he will wind up with a huge boner that everyone could see but at home, this sounds weird.
I guess if this is not a throw-away kind of problem you just need to be honest with him and tell him that you really enjoy kissing and it is hard that he has established the French kissing rule. It is really kind of ridiculous unless he has some super erection that won't go away for hours and even then, there is masturbation. | |
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| French kissing and sex...
Posted: 12/4/2007 4:37:51 PM |
How does it feel to have the "mood" word used on you?
Deacon you just sound bitter towards women in general. Sorry if you've been hurt in the past but that isn't the OP's fault. | |
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| French kissing and sex...
Posted: 12/4/2007 4:45:26 PM | Great cuddler. Lots of affection - even in public. French kissing at home when we are alone isn't a problem, unless we have to leave within a few minutes (no time for sex). Also no French in the car when saying 'goodbye' (no time " "). Only happens when sex is on the immediate menu. If he picks me up and I get a great kiss, I can bank on skipping the theatre and hitting the sheets. Not alltogether a 'bad' thing, I mean, come on. I like the whole shabang too. But a steamy or loving kiss here or there is the nectar of the Gods.
(not getting rid of him for this though - even if it can't be fixed - I'll learn to get over it)
vvvvvvvv-- have been dating and exclusive a bit over 3 months. Met him over a yr ago though, so it feels like longer - so I wonder sometimes if I'm just expecting 'too much, too soon'. | |
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| French kissing and sex...
Posted: 12/4/2007 5:02:48 PM | he sounds a lot like someone i was with.....how long have you dated him? His dodging the issue should be of a corcern to you especially when he is already "controlling" the type and timing of your affection to him. I get turned on easily too but staying that way can be fun. It is called anticipation. I hope it works out and that he is not like the guy I was with but who ever he is if it works for you both than that is what counts
Patty   | |
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| French kissing and sex...
Posted: 12/4/2007 5:13:19 PM | Maybe I have been celibate for too long, but ANY kissing, caressing with me, and I know I would 'lose it'. I don't want to, but that's how I feel.
Thinking back, I guess that's how I've always been. Self-control is NOT my strong suit...maybe I shouldn't be posting this.....
Question is: How can you get 'hot and heavy' and NOT have sex? Isn't that frustrating? | |
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| French kissing and sex...
Posted: 12/4/2007 5:16:22 PM | | It's obvious that he finds it highly stimulating. It can be quite painful if there is no sexual release. | |
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