| what ever happened to guys being gentlemen?
Posted: 9/10/2004 11:50:51 AM | | I know this may sound terrible and I'm not a sexiest person by far but what has happened to a guy just simply opening a car door for a girl...or opening a door in general for her? My mom tells me about the way that guys used to treat her when she was still dating. They were just more concious of the female and not in a sexual way but rather in a protective way. I know females are more independent now...and I sure as heck know I am but I still appreciate a guy that acts like a gentlemen not some horndog. No affense guys! | |
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| Re: what ever happened to guys being gentlemen?
Posted: 9/10/2004 12:59:57 PM | I think what happened to that is just what you said, women are more independant now. We never know when to open doors, etc. because we don't know which woman is going to thank us and which one will snap at us.
I, personally, try to hold doors open and even open car doors for my female friends because I know them and I know they appreciate it. When it's someone you don't know, it's hard to tell what the reaction might be. | |
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| Re: what ever happened to guys being gentlemen?
Posted: 9/10/2004 1:24:34 PM | when i first started dating my bf he would hold doors open make my teas. help put my dishes away....open my car door..make me dinner.
he still does all of these things. He made me a candlit steak dinner last weekend and got my fave wine...i almost cried. I was so happy...and shocked.
For so long i was taken advantage of....by my ex hubby..now this perfect guy sweeps me away and im blown away by his good graces...
im not used to it but i will not complain..its wonderful.. | |
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| Re: what ever happened to guys being gentlemen?
Posted: 9/10/2004 2:47:51 PM | wow...alura...it sounds as if you have a great guy there! :)
I feel like I should apologize for all of those females that snap at those of you guys that try to be gentlemen. Just because females are idependent...I don't understand why they have to put down those guys that are gentlemen. A females independence and a man being a gentlemen should have nothing to do with each other.
Or am I completely wrong? | |
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| Re: what ever happened to guys being gentlemen?
Posted: 9/10/2004 3:56:05 PM | LOL the thing is when a gentleman comes along the first thing women say is " its to good to be true" wtf is up with that? You treat a woman like you were taught to and they snap, think you are a weirdo or just plane call you a liar for being some one your not. In general these women need the crap slaped out of them to notice the gun stairing at them. It does not pay to act like a gentleman now days thats for sure, though i have no idea else how to act so any woman who says that crap to me gets the big DROP right then and there, not enough time in this world to be second guessed on everything that I am, some times I wonder if it was worth being born a back woods country boy.
Gado
Cant never Could, Wont never Will ! | |
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| Re: what ever happened to guys being gentlemen?
Posted: 9/10/2004 6:51:14 PM | I hardly can see anything good in what is refered to as "gentleman behavior".
The last thing I like is a girl who thinks men can be handy to have around.
As for a friend or a collegae, that's different, for then it goes both ways and respect is maintained.
I think most women should take it as an insult, when they are treated as a disabled person while they are not.
But ofcourse we cann't all feel the same about things.
Greetings
Tom | |
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| Re: what ever happened to guys being gentlemen?
Posted: 9/10/2004 6:55:35 PM | | there are plenty of gentlemen in Texas imho, I always have guys hold open doors for me and I make a point to say thanks! the last man I was with was a car door opener and shutter, it was awesome! | |
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| Re: what ever happened to guys being gentlemen?
Posted: 9/10/2004 8:13:39 PM | | i used to do stuff like that for my ex gf, and she didn't think anything of it, infact once i was walking with her and her firend and i opened the door for them and then later i did it again and her friend was all like" i wish my bf did that for me" then i told her all the little things like that i do, and she was shocked that my ex gf didn't think anyhting of it. i don't know. | |
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| Re: what ever happened to guys being gentlemen?
Posted: 9/10/2004 9:27:12 PM | | Please feel free men to hold the door open, open the car door, help us with heavy things that we are struggeling to carry. If you are not sure, and I am sure it can be confusing just ask the question, form it in a statement "I'm old school and I like to open doors for women/Ladies/Girls" be naturel about it, don't be all creepy, but please just do it. From my perspective when women said they wanted equal rights, it did not mean we were saying we have the same physical strength, and the desire to give up being made to feel all feminine and gurly. I believe it was just a statement of equal pay for equal labour, the right to vote, work outside the home and so on. I am independant and I still love to have doors held for me, things carried for me...it makes me feel all swooney. Please bring back chivalry I beg of you men. | |
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| Re: what ever happened to guys being gentlemen?
Posted: 9/10/2004 11:29:02 PM | would love a ginger tom to empty my litter box or open the flap for me to go threw.
and to be treated like a pursion cat.
some women still like being treated old fashion morals just need to find them
Hey girls when was the last time we open a door for a male or left them a rose on a pillow when they wake up...
It can be worked both ways..... | |
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Ruby_
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Joined: 7/10/2004
Msg: 12 | |
| Re: what ever happened to guys being gentlemen?
Posted: 9/11/2004 12:48:38 AM | | I don't take it as a personal insult if men don't open car doors for me. It is very rude if anyone lets a building door swing shut in your face. That goes for man or woman. | |
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| Re: what ever happened to guys being gentlemen?
Posted: 9/11/2004 5:31:16 AM | Alarmed...very well said! :) And yes it can both ways and should.
Gadolinx.....I believe there are alot of women out there that have never been treated like that....which is a shame. Therefore they don't know how to react and then again there are some that do take it as an insult. Those are the women I would like to give a piece of my mind...but that is a different story. Bottom line...just don't stop what you are doin' and that goes for all of you "gentlemen" out there. In this day and age when life is a pile of cow dung...I think it's the little things like that that make it a little nicer to live in.
A mutual respect for each other is diffenetly needed. | |
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| Re: what ever happened to guys being gentlemen?
Posted: 9/11/2004 6:26:04 AM | | My ex boyfriend always did the little,little things thats means a lot to me, like opening the door, pulling the chair and carry the heavy things that I have on me..I never asked but its just something that he loves to do and he knows that I appreciate it..for one thing he is so much bigger than me..and as independent as I am, I always feel touched, cared and protected every time he did that to me. | |
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| Re: what ever happened to guys being gentlemen?
Posted: 9/11/2004 7:21:50 AM | Who could resist a lovely cat?
Few girlfriend's had dogs. Oh yes, for those friendly creatures I openen the doors, spoiled them with little things to eat, etcetera.
But they also let you know how they appreciated that.
The best thing I get when opening a door for a girl is a surprised look, hardly positive, is it.
Tom | |
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| Re: what ever happened to guys being gentlemen?
Posted: 9/11/2004 7:29:59 AM | | Know how you feel Tom..but believe me there are still many ladies out there who truly appreciate those little but meaningful acts..from my own experience, the men who did that to me did it almost instinctively... | |
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| Re: what ever happened to guys being gentlemen?
Posted: 9/11/2004 1:13:50 PM | Hey Ms_Twang82!!!!!!!!!!!! Its your bestest pal in the whole world right here. I agree totally with what you say... although I will admit to bein a bit freaked out by guys that open the car door for me. I don't get angry or anything, but like you said, it is just so unusual for that sort of thing to happen that it is totally unexpected when it does. As you know I told you one thing that made me feel special with my ex. We would hold hands all the time, and even if we went somewhere where we couldn't walk side by side holdin hands, he would still cup his hands behind his back to where I could put mine in his. Whenever he did that it would make my heart jump and it totally made me feel truly special. That is what I am lookin for now, in a new guy. One that knows how to do the little things in life to make a girl feel truly special. You know... a way to have your own little click in this busy bustling world.
Chelle | |
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jimi77
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Joined: 7/13/2004
Msg: 18 | |
| Re: what ever happened to guys being gentlemen?
Posted: 9/12/2004 7:35:21 PM | | when i guy is a gentleman it seems he gets left for the guy that is an ass? I must admit i still open doors for women even if i am not intrested in them like at malls and such. also if a guy doenst show some sort of sexual intrest it seems he get put in the were just friends class. that is the same as saying the c word to a woman LOL!!!. just kidding. but if a guy is intrested in a women he will show sexual intrest. were phyical and visual. just as women are feelings and emotions. | |
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| Re: what ever happened to guys being gentlemen?
Posted: 9/13/2004 7:10:39 AM | | I have always prided myself on being a gentleman and am very proud i sincerely hope we can keep the trend alive and not let the immature w*****s of the world take over and ruin it for everyone... | |
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| Re: what ever happened to guys being gentlemen?
Posted: 9/13/2004 10:37:09 AM | | I know how you feel.I had dated, ungentlemenly men (lol nice word) for awhile. It wasn't too nice and I began to think, "Okay,it's always going to be like this..." Me running to catch up to my bf,the door shutting behind him on me..haha..putting himself first constantly. It didn't really bother me or make me think until I met my current bf. He's a total gentleman and SO protective of me. He opens all the doors,closes them too, always puts me first, makes sure I'm comfortable, actually cares about everything I want to do, and remembers everything I say. He's a gem.I'm not too used to it but I think I can learn to be..haha So there are just as many awesome guys out there as there are...not-so-awesome. | |
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| Re: what ever happened to guys being gentlemen?
Posted: 9/13/2004 12:28:26 PM | | I totally agree with you on that one. I guess everything is a two way street and you have to look at it from both angles. I will be honest it does seem like the nice guys finish last...but just a little hint to all the nice guys that feel that way...the girls that let you get by are probably kicking themselves right now. Been there...done that...still kicking myself. lol | |
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| Re: what ever happened to guys being gentlemen?
Posted: 9/13/2004 2:51:22 PM | I've gotta agree with Ms_twang82, not just because she and I are like sisters, but because we are both looking for the same type of guy... but just a little different. :-) LOL, her and I were both raised with positive values, and high principles. We have both had so much love in our lives from both of our families. We were raised with the values that family comes first no matter what. We were also raised with the truth that it doesn't just take blood-lines to make someone a family. I like the idea that her family considers me a part of her family, and our on-going friendship has made her a very important part of my family also. It seems as though that many of the guys we meet doesn't put family and friends above themselves. The priorties in most of their lives seems to be partying and having fun. Having fun in life is important, we put our loved ones first, but we still manage to go out and have fun. I guess what all I am trying to say in the moral to all of this, is that many times girls are just searching soo hard for someone that has the same morals and priorities that they have, and sometimes they look right over the ones that they are looking for. I have kissed a lot of frogs in my life, and I have let some of the greatest guys in the world slip away. But there is a reason that these things don't work out. Maybe it just isn't the right time, and something will work out later... or maybe it just wasn't meant to be between those two people from the get go. But somewhere out there God has the other half to everyone who is searching. I am single right now for a reason... maybe there are some more trials that I need to face before beginning a serious relationship and going on with my life, or maybe I am meant to be the single maiden aunt in my family and the one that my nephews and nieces turn to for advice. Who know.... only God does... but we shouldn't try to take the matter into our own hands... because sometime we can prolong the work that God is trying to do in our lives. We could simply be hindering him. So if you are single and waiting patiently for that one and only to walk into your life, then just enjoy it while you can. Right now, my priorities, are my nephews, my nieces, my brother, sister, parents, and my greatest friends in the world... and I am going to enjoy the time of putting them first in my life for right now... but when I meet mr. right, then I can focus my time on him and the priorities I have already listed, and hopefully someday I will be putting our future children first. But I am not going to rush it... it will come when it comes... so everyone should do that....enjoy the time for just you yet still keep your eyes open to possibities, and the right gentleman or lady will come along.
Chelle
P.S. lol... even though ms_twang is my good friend... she may not agree to everything I had to say in here... so I am looking forward to what she has to say... ;-) | |
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| Re: what ever happened to guys being gentlemen?
Posted: 9/13/2004 3:49:05 PM | | <----Was, is and always will be a gentleman. Opening doors, and carrying heavy loads have always been in my nature. I learned everything I hod to about chivalry from my dad, even after 30 years of marriage, my parents love each other like they met yesterday, and he always opens doors for her, and even threw his jacket down on a puddle once, just so her feet wouldn;t get wet. I don't mind being called a freak, weirdo, crazy or whatever else have you, I know how to treat my woman, independent or not, in the manner I was brought up to follow. | |
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