| Looking for "fun"
Posted: 1/1/2008 7:26:29 PM | It's an interesting one here.
Why do so many women take offence if a man advertises that he's looking for sex?
Or do they. Are these women just a tiny, but noisy, minority, while the rest of the women appreciate the honesty.
Seems that guys can aske for
"friends with benifits" = sex
'sleepovers" = sex
" looking for fun" = sex
' intimate friend' = sex.
But they can't just say, looking for sex.
This can be a real problem in the global villiage where English is often a second language.
Friends with benifits can also mean, own your oown home"
And "fun" can mean any sort of fun sexual or non sexual. | |
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| Looking for fun
Posted: 1/1/2008 7:41:32 PM | I take no offense to men who say they are looking to have fun.
But a man should respect me when I say I don't want to have fun with them. | |
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| Looking for fun
Posted: 1/1/2008 8:29:43 PM | I don't take offense to it unless they're emailing me looking for it. LOL
If that is what you are looking for then stick with the gals who are also only looking for that. There's just way too many guys who are looking for just that but contact us gals who are looking to date, get to know someone & possible long term relationship & it's offensive. We end up screaming things like, "What in the hell about my profile says I'm here for just sex?!?!?!" Then they get all "Oh sorry" or worse ... screaming at YOU for THEIR faux pas. Which ruins the Fishy altogether. Sigh. | |
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Icene
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Joined: 6/26/2007
Msg: 5 | |
| Looking for fun
Posted: 1/1/2008 9:46:03 PM | | I don't think its offensive to be honest about what you're looking for. So long as he respects when I politely refuse, there isn't a problem. | |
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| Looking for fun
Posted: 1/1/2008 9:52:43 PM | Advertise for a threesome with a giraffe & a hippo, for all I care. Just leave me out of it, thanks.
I don't think women get offended when a man advertises for sex, at all. I think they get offended when he shows up in her "dating/LTR/friends, not just sex" inbox, with a lot of disgusting sexual innuendo and uninvited comments on her parts.
It isn't offensive to me if you want to get laid, it isn't anything at all to me. So leave me alone, and I'll do the same for you & nobody ends up offended. | |
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| Looking for fun
Posted: 1/1/2008 9:59:40 PM | Actually, I am much more annoyed by players who pretend that they are looking for a relationship when all they want is to get laid.
If you are just looking for sex, and are open about it, I have no problem with that whatsoever.
Now, will I be interested in joining you in that particular activity? That's a whole different question... to be determined on a merit of an individual case.
That, however, does NOT mean that I would like to receive a photo of your penis or a message with a detailed description of your latest fantasy...
Let me repeat that once again for added emphasis:
That, however, does NOT mean that I would like to receive a photo of your penis or a message with a detailed description of your latest fantasy...
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| Looking for fun
Posted: 1/1/2008 9:59:45 PM | Ditto on what Karla said too.
The ones that get on my nerves are those that then start whining when they don't get what they want and then it's suddenly all women's fault or the feminist's fault that he can't get some.  | |
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| Looking for fun
Posted: 1/1/2008 10:06:14 PM | I personally am not offended when I see that a man is looking for no strings attached sex, I just know that he isn't the type of man I'm looking for. As has been mentioned, it is offensive when a man looks at my profile, sees that I am looking for a long term relationship, which fairly obviously would exclude NSA sex, and then chooses to contact me looking for sex. Just the same as I would be offended if I happened to be vegan (I'm not) and stated that I only dated vegans in my profile, then had non-vegans message me and invite me out for a steak dinner (I would so love to go out for a steak). It is offensive when someone is unconcerned with my preferences and ignores them completely. Now, I don't get so offended that it ruins my day or anything, I usually am amused by lame attempts to lure me into a meaningless sexual fling.
I wonder, do men who list looking for intimate encounter have lots of women message them looking for a long term relationship? That would make about as much sense as men who are looking for NSA sex messaging women looking for a serious relationship, wouldn't it?
Seriously, I just ignore messages from men who are clearly just looking for sex. Really, if I want to have sex, I have several male friends who have made it clear they will help me out with those needs any time I ask. And, I know them well enough to not worry about my safety at the end of the night.
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| Looking for fun
Posted: 1/2/2008 12:03:52 AM | | Honesty is always the best policy. Cuts down on time loss. | |
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| Looking for fun
Posted: 1/2/2008 12:10:46 AM |
Why do so many women take offence if a man advertises that he's looking for sex?
Well, judging from the reaction to my own profile (which specifies "sex" and "fun", there's a reason I put both) it seems we're getting a strange skew in the sample. In fact, I suspect that at least one of the answers is... cough...cough...a falsehood!
Come on, some of you offended women, speak up!
I daresay that virtually all men are looking for sex.
So perhaps it's unnecessary to specify it?! | |
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| Looking for fun
Posted: 1/3/2008 8:08:39 AM | Well, judging from the reaction to my own profile (which specifies "sex" and "fun", there's a reason I put both) it seems we're getting a strange skew in the sample. In fact, I suspect that at least one of the answers is... cough...cough...a falsehood!
Really? I looked at your profile, and you are indeed clear about what you want, but not in an insulting way. Reading your profile, I wasn't offended, I just know there is zero chance that we should try to date, as it seems we want totally different things, as far as commitment. So, I wasn't offended, but would never think about contacting you. Do you have women contact you just to b1tch about your stated desire for a sexual relationship? I guess I shouldn't be surprised - now I understand a bit more, why men think women are way too dramatic and touchy.
There is a guy on here that keeps contacting me, with short, "u r hot" type messages. I checked his profile, which is equally short, doesn't specify looking for sex, but lists his physical stats, so he seems to be looking for sex in my opinion. So, I just ignore his messages. I really wonder about some women if they have time to contact you just to complain about what you are looking for - better to spend that time exploring more compatible men, in my opinion. | |
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nogo3
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Joined: 2/26/2007
Msg: 13 | |
| Looking for fun
Posted: 1/3/2008 11:54:30 AM | hell i'm always looking for fun stuff to do and i sure am not looking for sex. Sex is for the poor guys that ain't getting any.
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| Looking for fun
Posted: 1/3/2008 11:57:58 AM | There is nothing wrong with wanting to have sex. But as a mature woman I am not looking just to get laid. " Been there done that " I am interested in an emotionally intimate loving committed relationship. So I pass on any fellow who puts looking for sex or the many thinly veiled references for sex in his profile because I interpret that as "I just want to get laid" Although I am not offended by the honesty I am also not interested in what the man is offering. I want the whole thing or nothing.  | |
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| Looking for fun
Posted: 1/3/2008 12:11:30 PM | To Msg#11
I agree sex is quite a wonderful activity. So am I looking to have sex? Most definitely. But not without a deeply loving relationship to go along with it. For me it is not necessary to specify it. If it is a good loving relationship then for me it means sex is a part of the relationship and is an expression of my love and trust.
I do get offended when I state I am looking for a long term relationship and I get an e-mail from someone wanting an "intimate" encounter ie. sex. Are they stupid? Can they not read?
I am here to find a long term relationship with all that entails. For me putting" sex" in your profile is a turn off and I will move on to another profile.
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| Looking for fun
Posted: 1/3/2008 12:36:43 PM | | I don't get offended when it comes up. | |
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| Looking for fun
Posted: 1/3/2008 1:51:00 PM |
I don't get offended when it comes up.
But you do...when it goes down. | |
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| Looking for fun
Posted: 1/3/2008 1:54:31 PM |
This can be a real problem in the global villiage where English is often a second language.
Friends with benifits can also mean, own your oown home"
And "fun" can mean any sort of fun sexual or non sexual.
Owning your own home can mean, FWB???????????? Geezus, I'm behind in terminology. FWB means just like that in my lingo. Sex and a few laughs but nothing more.
Sorry, fun to me means fun. Not sex. Sex on the other hand, means we get naked or semi-thereof and go to town. Fun, might be included, but isn't inclusive of such activities. JMO  | |
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| Looking for fun
Posted: 1/3/2008 4:18:07 PM | | doesn't offend me at all. If sex is all he's after, I'm sure he can find it/has found it/is getting it....one way or another | |
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| Looking for fun
Posted: 1/3/2008 4:20:59 PM | | I alway like..."laid back".."down to earth"...looking for the same.. | |
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| Looking for fun
Posted: 1/3/2008 4:44:51 PM | | Too funny. I do not know of any women who are "offended" by men advertising for sex. I'm looking for sex, too, but want OTHER stuff as well--I don't JUST want the other stuff. I didn't feel I had to write that "want sex" part in, isn't it implicit since I'm on the site? | |
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| Looking for fun
Posted: 1/3/2008 4:47:32 PM | This can be a real problem in the global villiage where English is often a second language.
Friends with benifits can also mean, own your oown home"
And "fun" can mean any sort of fun sexual or non sexual.
Owning your own home can mean, FWB???????????? Geezus, I'm behind in terminology. FWB means just like that in my lingo. Sex and a few laughs but nothing more.
Sorry, fun to me means fun. Not sex. Sex on the other hand, means we get naked or semi-thereof and go to town. Fun, might be included, but isn't inclusive of such activities. JMO
I think that is a big problem, so many people have an opinion on what people are trying to say they read more into it then what meets the eye.
I could have in my profile "fun loving guy" and more then one person will say "Oh he is just out for a one nighter."
Nothing could be further then the truth, but when someone gets it stuck in their thick skull all the talking in the world will mean nothing.
It would be a lie if I said some people out there men and women would like to do more then window shop and others are willing to develop a relationship just to find out someone has an insatiable kinky fetish.
I personally enjoy sex as dose my partner (whom ever it is) but I do not want nor do I expect sex on a first date.
Inadvertently there are people that will read my profile and say "he is just a horn dog and he is out for just one thing."
If you are the type of person that thinks that then it is a good thing you will not message me because I will most likely not want to have a relationship with a person that thinks like that way anyway.
No, I am not picking on the two people I quoted I just wanted to show how misunderstandings happen. | |
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| Looking for fun
Posted: 1/3/2008 11:26:54 PM | I think that if more people set out to have fun with their date, there would be a lot less people complaining that they aint getting enough. | |
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| Looking for fun
Posted: 1/3/2008 11:53:04 PM |
I looked at your profile, and you are indeed clear about what you want, but not in an insulting way
You're not old enough to understand yet. 
This thread is a veiled continuation of another thread where I had an absolute ball making fun of a few women who were offended enough to have the thread deleted.
Apparently others felt the conversation should be continued.... | |
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