| views on the parental rights
Posted: 1/14/2008 2:44:41 PM | who thinks the law is wrong on what is right for children as mine are miserable and upset because they want to be with me but i can not do nothing about it except go to court which im going to do the mother is the one who lied cheated manipulated everybody and took everything away from me i did nothing wrong except proved a good healthy life for us all so why does the law automatically assume the the children are better of with there mother not there dad i would do anything for my children ( not like her ) who for some reason put us all second best behind herself she cannot look after herself properely eg mini stroke never seeked any help ???? + more so why does the law think like this
anybodys views please welcome
and dads who have managed to get residency order(custody) of there please reply | |
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| views on the parental rights
Posted: 1/14/2008 2:57:31 PM | UK, US, Ireland, Australia. It's really all about the same. Each country just mimics and copycats what the other is doing.
I've been through it too. Never hurts to take a good long look in the mirror and figure out what else there is about yourself to improve. Just be the best dad you can when you can.
You're hardly alone, -Chris | |
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| views on the parental rights
Posted: 1/14/2008 3:00:19 PM | | Gosh I'm sorry to hear about that. Its good to see fathers standing up though.Its true children are not always ok with the mom I guess its just an assumption. I everything works out for you | |
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naeco
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Joined: 12/16/2007
Msg: 5 | |
| views on the parental rights
Posted: 1/14/2008 3:04:16 PM | Go to this site and ask them if they have a Canadian counterpart:
http://www.familiesforjustice.com/ | |
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| views on the parental rights
Posted: 1/14/2008 3:22:54 PM | niceboyblue;
I fought a hard battle to get full legal custody re; two of my 3 children.
Men are winning custody all over the world now.
We are the minority but it can be done.
Yeah, who the hell made women better parents than men, please ask yourself that, bottom line, no one died and made them God.
Do you get full parental visitation OR are you denied all of your decreed rights??
How old are your children and what sex are they???
There are numerous avenues that you can try.
I would start with; Dr David Gardner if its parental alienation, just search it out on the web.
If your ex lied about herself, have her charged with direct contempt of court if the case/decree of dissolution is not past a year old.
These are but a few things that can be done.
All my best heartfelt thoughts are with you buddy,
JOHN | |
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| views on the parental rights
Posted: 1/14/2008 3:45:46 PM | Law doesn't mean justice anymore.
and it is hard to talk about this subject without knowing the children age; as it is a huge factor.
In the case of a divorce with children, there is in fact 3 sides who has rights, and 2 who has obligations and 1 who has no voice.
If both parents really care about the children welfare, they will put aside their own fights and blame throwing at that level and look at the children wants versus the children needs, as responsible adults.
In most cases, the children become a leverage or a revenge tool for one, sometimes both parties.
From what you have said here; there is something wrong about the court decision, or there is things that has not been said. | |
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soxxs
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Joined: 1/7/2008
Msg: 8 | |
| views on the parental rights
Posted: 1/14/2008 4:03:19 PM | OP " mine are miserable and upset because they want to be with me "
The laws are made so everyone falls under the same rules. Not 1 law for each person.
Take her to court and prove your case. And good luck...
jmo | |
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| views on the parental rights
Posted: 1/14/2008 4:03:49 PM | ^^^ you typed without thinking again... quit trying to be something you are not.
OP. As a person who has joint custody of his kids. The courts will choose which parent is better for the kids. It is pretty much a bashing contest in the courts as to who gets the kids. Most courts rule for the mother unless you can prove that the woman is not capable of keeping the children safe. Or prove she can not take care of the kids financially. If your kids are at risk of either of these things, call cps (good luck with those morons) and have them do a investigation. If they find out the children are at risk, then you will get custody of them.
Yes, I do not like cps. More children are harmed inside the care of cps than not. I seen a child who was a trouble maker, get molested by another child... while in cps custody. That child is my little cousin, Then they denied that the event even happened. The child still talks about it. | |
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| views on the parental rights
Posted: 1/14/2008 7:20:00 PM | I'm not a fan of CPS either.
We spent well over a year having a comprehensive custody evaluation done by a psychiatrist who specializes in these things. It was court approved. The custody report unequivocally recommended that I have custody. It was very well documented as to why. Court totally ignored the custody report! It came down to a bashing contest. She's still got the kids so I obviously wasn't real good at bashing!
The kids want to live here. My boy's flunking out of school. No one's willing to help him. I live five hours away so I'm limited on what I can do for him.
Sometimes I feel pretty good. Other times I wonder if I'll ever be whole again.
I had to liquidate a lot of my livestock as part of the divorce. Now I'm looking for a job. There aren't too many employers that are child friend.y. I can't believe how many companies expect someone to work every weekend.
-Chris | |
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| views on the parental rights
Posted: 1/15/2008 2:34:17 PM |
Yeah, who the hell made women better parents than men, please ask yourself that, bottom line, no one died and made them God.
Didn't you get the memo? Just the pure presence of a uterous determines that women are better parents!
Like myself and every other man thats been there... you have to scrap and fight and scrap and fight for every minute you get with your kids. When you finally win custody you have to fight and scrap and fight and scrap to battle all the prejudices that you will experience in society.
And while you are doing all of that you still have to keep your career going and keep a good positive attitude about yourself, the legal process and about women who are not your wife and those who don't automatically assume women are better parents.
But, in the end it is worth every ounce of the battle because you then know your children are getting the love, affection, patience, understanding and guidance that they deserve.
On the other hand, if you start this battle just to get even with your ex (which is what everyone will believe and her attorneys will accuse you of) then you will not win and you will only hurt your children. | |
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| views on the parental rights
Posted: 1/15/2008 2:52:56 PM | Good issue - and one I'm passionate about. I'm a political consultant and I'm proud to say my clients in the legislature passed a law here in Georgia last session that makes 50/50 custody the default. In other words, barring unusual circumstances, a judge is now bound by law to give fathers an equal amount of time. We also reworked our child support laws to give those fathers some credit since they have the exact same expenses as the mother. I was thrilled to see fairness, common sense, and justice prevail! :)
There was a time my ex was geting almost $30,000 a year in child support AND kept my daughter from me for all but 4 days a month for most of the year. The worst part is she lives in a mini mansion and has a higher standard of living than I do. I've got all that changed now, but it's kind of nice to make a difference for all the other fathers out there still getting screwed! :)
Mark
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| views on the parental rights
Posted: 1/15/2008 3:00:39 PM | Courts are also listening more to children these days. It is not uncommon for a judge to ask a child where THEY want to be. If you really believe the children will respond favorably then ask the judge to have them interviewed by a child advocate.
I have custodial custody currently but should my oldest child (boy) decide as a teen he'd rather be with his Dad. I would be heartbroken but could not reasonably object because his father is a good parent. | |
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| views on the parental rights
Posted: 1/15/2008 3:44:23 PM | hi thanks for that aprincelyfrog i know some people may think i want to get even with the ex but as where i live and im a local lad whos lived there all my life except for about 2 years i have all my friends relatives the lot looking out for me and know the real reason im doing it is for the rights of my children to be stood up and be heard i know there 5 + 9 but the 9 year old is very mature for his age and knows what he wants.
as for the career my solicitor told me i stand a better chance being unemployed as i have the time for the children .
the only thing im interested in is what ever will make my children happy not what i want or what my ex has done or wants this is what i need to try and prove in court
the only thing is she has let me see the children when i want and also has to phone me when they play her up as im the one they listen to like always as she cannot control them and never has been able to
im the strong minded man who believes in everybody no matter what age has a right to be heard weather 5 or 100
as for hurting her or the bloke she ran off with i would not want to stoop as low as them i have pride if i had the money i would give it to the bloke she had the affair with and say thanks for taking her of my hands women like that im better off without i suppose it all about standing tall and being strong and having a little faith | |
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| views on the parental rights
Posted: 1/15/2008 4:00:45 PM | im a single father only got my child after my ex left her with her older sister (not mine)
the courts wouldnt give her to me i will not say y becouse i dont bash
i had everything needed and ex had nothing
did not do anything they wanted her to do
and they still gave her to her
but i have my child today
good piece of advice
be the way u want your child to act
when they get older
they'll see who is who
I did
I would have hated my dad if he acted like an a** hole
Its funny im going through the same as my dad did | |
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| views on the parental rights
Posted: 1/15/2008 4:12:42 PM | Good issue - and one I'm passionate about. I'm a political consultant and I'm proud to say my clients in the legislature passed a law here in Georgia last session that makes 50/50 custody the default. In other words, barring unusual circumstances, a judge is now bound by law to give fathers an equal amount of time. We also reworked our child support laws to give those fathers some credit since they have the exact same expenses as the mother. I was thrilled to see fairness, common sense, and justice prevail! :)
I got my divorce in Atlanta... I guarantee you there is no one on any bench that I encountered that is not corrupt beyond belief... given the facts in my case there was no conceivable way they could have granted custody to my ex... but they did and shortly thereafter the GAL was appointed a Judicial Officer.
I'll believe your 50/50 in 5 years when the statistics proove that out. Until then I will forever believe the Fulton County Family Courts is corrupt to the bone.
As for those child support laws... dont' take too much credit, you copied Floridas and you did that because the GA supreme court had ruled yours unconstitutional... but did that keep those crooked judges from sticking men with the maximum payments?
Which is why I and my kids now reside in FL...
Dont even get me started on Ga divorce laws... best laws in the book are useless when you have corrupt judges implementing them. | |
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naeco
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Joined: 12/16/2007
Msg: 19 | |
| views on the parental rights
Posted: 1/15/2008 4:22:59 PM |
Courts are also listening more to children these days. It is not uncommon for a judge to ask a child where THEY want to be.
That all depends on the judge. Throughout my divorce and custody hearings, they didn't even ask my son what he wanted. | |
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| views on the parental rights
Posted: 1/15/2008 7:10:03 PM | | My son said repeatedly throughout the custody evaluation process that he wanted to live with me here on the farm. He even told the judge during the trial! In the end the court went against his wishes. | |
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| views on the parental rights
Posted: 1/15/2008 7:31:20 PM | I hate to see stuff like this happening. I do have custody of my daughter and it is most of the time but I have made sure that her father got convenient schedule to make things easier on him.
It hasn't been perfect and I hope that you succeed and that the best interests of the children are eventually listened to. Unfortunately, in many jurisdictions, the outdated view of mothers being the best isn't always the correct one.
I am in Canada and a friend of mine has fought a long and hard and expensive court battle to get his daughter and his son. His daughter he has (mostly because she is 12 and has that right to say where she wants to go) but his son is still out of reach.
All I can say is keeping fighting. Believe me, you won't regret it. | |
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| views on the parental rights
Posted: 1/16/2008 7:50:58 AM | Dont even get me started on Ga divorce laws... best laws in the book are useless when you have corrupt judges implementing them.
How long ago was your divorce, and exactly who was the judge princelyfrog? The new legislation was just passed...
And exactly what EVIDENCE of corruption do you have? That's a really easy accusation to make, but unless you can back it up, it's also DEFAMATORY.
As far as your critical remarks of me and my efforts go - let me ask you this question: What exactly have YOU done to change things? It's really easy to sit back, do jack sh*t and criticize those of us who DO get involved and actually make a difference - but what have YOU personally done about the problems you complain about other than bitch, whine, and complain?
Mark
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| views on the parental rights
Posted: 1/16/2008 10:13:52 AM | Guys, be absolutely certain that you're right when you start the process of getting your kids.
My ex tried that. Full evaluation and everything. Tried to prove I was mentally ill to the point of complete incompetence, accused me of sexual abuse, the whole nine yards. It ended up backfiring badly on him, mostly because he isn't the prince he thinks he is, not even in the eyes of his child, and I'm not the monster he thinks I am.
If they find out you're wrong, they will think you're lying, even if you believe what you're saying, and from that point on, the court will believe nothing you say. The more you try to argue your case, the more you'll annoy them. Stick to what can be verified, and make sure you can pass an MMPI-2 before you request an evaluation.
And before you say it's easy for me because I'm a woman, I'm a disabled woman. We get our children taken away even when nobody is fighting us for custody, just on general principle. This would have been a walk in the park for him if he hadn't screwed it up by making accusations he couldn't corroborate and having himself subjected to psychological testing. Having our kid interviewed by two separate people was also a mistake. The only reason he hasn't lost all custody is because the courts here are very friendly to dads. Both our judge and our child support arbitrator are fathers' rights activists. That's how badly he's mangling this.
Which brings me to another point: if the court says that you're doing something wrong, fix it, don't argue with them. The more you argue with them, the less they like you, and if the other parents is more responsive, they will like you even less. | |
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| views on the parental rights
Posted: 1/16/2008 11:22:30 AM | You're right! There's not much arguing with the courts!
I passed the MMPI-2 and every other psychiatric evaluation test they could think of to throw at me. The ex lied so much when she took her tests that they were deemed invalid. | |
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| views on the parental rights
Posted: 1/16/2008 11:41:54 AM | 2001.
As for what I have done... its simple... I stayed in and fought and fought and fought and refused to give up regardless of the threats of incarceration and other attempts at intimmitdation.
I now reside in FL where I get a fair shake in the courts and my kids are safe from malicious claims and corrupt judges.
As for those judges names, I am in the process of dealing with both judges (although one was dealt a bit of justice by her lesbian lover already and the other has been removed from familiy courts). Their is also a JO who "earned" her position on the backs of my children... she's my favorite target and its her ass that I want to see disbared.
GA is famous for toothless laws. In your own statement judges are required by law to automatically give 50/50 custody unless their are mitigating circumstances... I will just guarantee you that 90% of the cases will have some form of mitigating circumstance... toothless and just more of the same old crap.
When you make it a felony requiring jail time for a spouse and/or her attorney to falsely accuse another spouse of child abuse just to gain the upper hand in family courts you MAY have a chance. Until then, all your laws have done is to up the ante. | |
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