| A Gender I'll Never Understand...
Posted: 1/15/2008 2:21:49 PM | Is there anything so hugely wrong with my profile because I've made contact with a few girls who seemed my sort of type and more often than not I get ignored and to tell the truth it's starting to get me down a bit. I don't think I'm a dreadful looker and its not like I portray myself as a very dull person, I might even be an OK catch but it's not happening.
Any suggestions as to what I'm doing wrong? I sent messages after an initial response suggesting drinks and such like but then it all goes dead. Does this appear overly sleazy, I just want to make a good impression. Help! | |
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| A Gender I'll Never Understand...
Posted: 1/15/2008 2:28:49 PM | You might want to post this in profile review. It's likely to get deleted here.
But looking at your profile....you're an attractive, tall, guy who is working towards a clear goal educationally. Good sense of humor...smart.
Just realize that lots of people on here NEVER meet anyone. Some are on for games and don't even have "their" picture up. Just don't let it get you down. Keep trying. There are people on here who want to meet and are looking for a real-life relationship. | |
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fay98
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Joined: 8/8/2007
Msg: 5 | |
| A Gender I'll Never Understand...
Posted: 1/15/2008 2:32:43 PM | | Ok not profile review section but the only thing I noticed was.......not to much patter,X factor, etc. Women don't like to be told what to say or not say. If you meet her and it doesn't click you can both move on. Reading that was a turnoff for me. Just a thought doesn't mean I'm right. good luck~ | |
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| A Gender I'll Never Understand...
Posted: 1/15/2008 2:33:10 PM |
I've made contact with a few girls who seemed my sort of type
Maybe try girls where you seem THEIR sort of type. | |
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| A Gender I'll Never Understand...
Posted: 1/15/2008 3:25:12 PM |
Wrong forum, post the question in Profile Reviews.
Doesn't seem to matter... there will be those ladies that respond in here. It's no wonder other guys come here to get their profiles "reviewed"... personally I think it's for the attention. These guys know there's a profile review area, but gosh darn it they want a womans opinion so this seems to be the place to get it.. and they do.
Bluezzz | |
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| A Gender I'll Never Understand...
Posted: 1/15/2008 3:27:15 PM | You go on and on about yourself,yet you aren't saying a heck of a lot.
What kind of relationship are you looking for?
Friendship,dating,intimate encounter?
Another thing,this question would get you a lot more answers if you post it in
Profile Reviews. | |
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| A Gender I'll Never Understand...
Posted: 1/15/2008 3:54:37 PM | I do apologise, I hadn't seen that, sorry it seems to have caused such massive offence.
Incidentally, isn't it funny how the words 'pedantic' and 'transatlantic' rhyme? ever thought there might be something in this? | |
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fay98
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Joined: 8/8/2007
Msg: 11 | |
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| A Gender I'll Never Understand...
Posted: 1/15/2008 6:32:21 PM |
there will be those ladies that respond in here. It's no wonder other guys come here to get their profiles "reviewed"... personally I think it's for the attention. These guys know there's a profile review area, but gosh darn it they want a womans opinion so this seems to be the place to get it.. and they do.
It would be so nice if they didn't "reward" the rule breakers. SO nice. Even just for ONE day... One day...
I don't click their profiles. NEVER.
Especially when getting SUCKED in by a vague/misleading subject line.
It doth pisseth me off.
Verily. | |
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| A Gender I'll Never Understand...
Posted: 1/15/2008 6:56:43 PM |
The threads get deleted. The guys know this and are doing a smash and grab attention run.
This is quite true.....guys come here and post these attention seeking threads in"ask a girl" for an ego boost...
Because our male ego is very fragile. 
NOW !!!! P*SS OFF to the right forum.....you you attention seeker you....pffftt | |
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| A Gender I'll Never Understand...
Posted: 1/16/2008 4:26:54 AM | | Don't worry about it Op. I think most of us have made a mistake or two in our lives. And if something like this is enough to incite fury in someone...well....imagine what they'd do if someone did something worse....like knocking on their door by mistake, or bumping into them in the hall. Then there'd be hell to pay! | |
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| A Gender I'll Never Understand...
Posted: 1/16/2008 4:38:56 AM | I'm not furious at the OPs of these threads.
I'm cranky with my female peers that encourage them to bypass rules for a few hits on the profile.
Can't blame them for trying. Nor the hoards that follow by example.
I am seriously BEGGING women to not provide a review and instead just give a link instead.
Please? | |
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| A Gender I'll Never Understand...
Posted: 1/16/2008 5:05:43 AM | C'mon ladies, just help a dude n give him some clues on what and what not to do/write in his emails...the deed has already been done! (wrong forum, but doesn't really matter anyway)
Dude, like you said "I sent messages after an initial response suggesting drinks and such like but then it all goes dead"...i think you need to take your time to get to know these ladies before suggesting to go out for drinks and all that, as they may think you are desperate!
You know females are quite different from the males, and so try to think like them (works for me sometimes)
I just suggest you take your time and get to know these ladies before trying to link up with them...its a waiting game (could be fraustrating @ tyms, but you just have to deal with it anyway like the rest of the other guys)
Try my formula, if it works just gimme a shout!
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| A Gender I'll Never Understand...
Posted: 1/16/2008 6:46:55 AM | It sounds a little like you're all over the place, and too busy for dating/a relationship. I would refine your profile a bit and go from there. Maybe work on a couple of really good pictures with you smiling (and leave out the messy room in the background LOL).
Other than that, just be patient. I would try and meet some women through school, though as I had the best luck with meeting guys while I was in school - they're your age, they share common interests, etc. | |
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| A Gender I'll Never Understand...
Posted: 1/16/2008 7:52:06 AM | | im thinking you are asking them for a date to soon.quite often you have to talk to a girl for upwards of 2 weeks before they feel comfortable to go on a date.remember,most girls on here are interested in 3 or 4 guys at a time.they dont need to just jump out and date the first one that asks.she would rather talk and get to know you.mostly just trying to catch you in a lie or to see if your a fake.patients and paying attention to the signs that she is interested will go a long way.more often then not if you just chat and have a few laughs with them they will practicaly tell you they would like to meet you.let them dictate it. | |
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| A Gender I'll Never Understand...
Posted: 1/16/2008 7:55:31 AM | | oh ya,this post is better reworded and put into a dating catagory.you will get much better advise from guys who are successfull on the sights then ladies who cant see it from a mans perspective. | |
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| A Gender I'll Never Understand...
Posted: 1/16/2008 4:00:58 PM | I viewed you profile. It's not bad --- maybe a little rambling. I would delete the "mild" profanities like "s**ks" . Some women have a hair-trigger for even the slightest of vulgarities and could mean immediate rejection. I know that many (MANY) women of my generation find such language objectionable. I realize it's all over the entertainment industry -- movies, CDs, television, etc. but I still would prefer you keep your profile as "G-Rated" as possible. You want to maximize your chances not waste them.
Listen, since I've started internet "dating" in August '07, I've had a total of four (4) dates and a couple of meets for coffee. I call these sites (and I've been on a few) SCREENING sites because there's not much actual DATING going on ---- but a whole lot of screening. I dated a woman in November (not from POF) who screened me and asked me all kinds of personal questions for weeks before she would even agree to meet me for a coffee! I have no criminal record, have a college degree, have never been arrested, don't smoke, son't do drugs, have never, ever been violent towards women or anyone for that matter, not seeing anyone (at the time), not married --- pretty much a boy-scout! So we finally agreed to meet at a cafe in her area (15 miles from me) and she stood me up. Then she calls me on my cell phone while i was all dejected and on my way back home and told me that she got the "willies" at the last moment and apologized like 7 times and then asked me for another meeting. So we meet the next day and the aforementioned cafe and she procedes to tell me about her life in crime---yes REAL CRIME. Remember, she screened me! She also tells me flat-out that she smokes pot regularly, only has a part-time job and an 9 year old daughter and is need of a partner to help pay the rent on her apartment which is 2 months behind! Is this woman for real?! Some date! Who was the one who actually needed to be screened? She asked me if I had any pot. I said I don't smoke pot. She asked me if I take any perscription drugs like valium or oxy-something or other! I told her I have never even taken perscription drugs and rarely even use OTC drugs. She said she couldn't believe me! Really! She couldn't believe ME! I just broke down right there and started to laugh. All this after she painstakingly SCREENED ME for 2 weeks. I told this woman everything about me and yet she never revealed a thing to me about her questionable drug habits, yet she knows a whole lot about me--- information she wanted to feel safer about me when we eventually met. Some women (and men, too) know how to abuse that trust thing! She had me think that she was the kind of girl I was looking for and then dropped the bomb on me only when we actually did meet. I feel like I was victim of identity theft. I ended the meeting right then and there. I think she even emailed me a few more times after this peculiar date---wanting to "get together" again. Believe it or not, I had another "dating" "incident" similar to this one!
If you're a man, you have to be prepared to jump through hoops somewhat to get many women to trust you. (Remember we're living in the post-Dahmer/Manson/Bundy era!) You should be as up front and honest from the get-go. Women will understandably need to feel safe before they agree to see you, but it's no guarantee that the woman who finally does trust you is going to be someone YOU trust -- this I can state from experience. This a truth you will need to get used to. You just need to have faith and know that she's out there and you will find her. One thing you have a lot of is time----- you're young and probably see a lot of available ladies in your day to day goings on. So don't lose heart, there are people out here with even worse stories than yours! Good luck in your search!  | |
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| A Gender I'll Never Understand...
Posted: 1/16/2008 4:15:36 PM | Hey there bigbeachblanketfor2, did ya miss the "this isn't the Profile Review area" posts earlier?? Guess maybe you did.
Oh, and what in gods green earth induced you to rant endlessly about your dating snafus?? Nice thread-hijack!
Jeeeeez... ya give 'em books, send 'em to school and what do they do???
Bluezzz | |
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