| I'm the other women
Posted: 1/18/2008 2:08:23 AM | I know this is gonna sound terrible. But I am sleeping with someone in college, who has a girlfriend. Who I really like.
Whats worse is he initiated it. And I know I have feelings for him too ... but I know I should call it off.
Can anyone help me? | |
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| I'm the other women
Posted: 1/18/2008 2:14:05 AM | | Yes i can help, stop sleeping with him break all contact, cause it aint going to go anywhere he's getting his cake and eating it. If he can cheat on his girlfriend he will do it to you | |
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| I'm the other women
Posted: 1/18/2008 2:19:01 AM | you're damned if you do and damned if you don't.
1) you stay with him - he dumps his girlfriend and dates you - you have it in the back of your head that he will do the same to you.
2) you stay with him - he never dumps his girlfriend - you eventually grow up and get out of a potentially damaging relationship.
3) you break up with him - you regret it because you care about him.
4) you break it off, and move on, and eventually become the type of person who doesn't get wrapped up in other peoples bullshit. | |
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| I'm the other women
Posted: 1/18/2008 2:20:31 AM | No , it does not sound as terrible as you think.....the key focus is to keep your dreams and goals front and center..your priorities.
Males will come into your life and they will go like the wind.......he is not the one your supposed to be with ...k? Put that in mind.
Just remember...IF he is cheating on HER..he would cheat on YOU. He is not good bf material...does not take relationships too seriously..too young..too immature at this point in his life.
Take care, be all you can be out there..k?
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| I'm the other women
Posted: 1/18/2008 2:22:30 AM | | Well if he did that with you chances are hes gonna do it with other women so even if you get out now its gonna end ugly between him and his gf. | |
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| I'm the other women
Posted: 1/18/2008 2:30:04 AM | | oh yeah, and i forgot to mention... why do you assume you're the only *other* girl? this is how people get std's. | |
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| I'm the other women
Posted: 1/18/2008 2:36:57 AM |
but I know I should call it off.
YUP , and 'Here's' WHY ...
And I know I have feelings for him too
'Things' are gonna start to get real *Messy* for Op , and real quick.
Can anyone help me?
Help 'WHAT'?
(gonna mail out his # , have SomeBody Else do the deed?)
Just Get 'ON IT' , get Past It.
In just a short time, all will have been a mere *blip* on the radar.
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| I'm the other women
Posted: 1/18/2008 2:47:36 AM |
storm18 wrote:
> I know this is gonna sound terrible. But I am sleeping with someone
> in college, who has a girlfriend. Who I really like. Whats worse is he
> initiated it. And I know I have feelings for him too ... but I know I
> should call it off. Can anyone help me?
There's a word called "INTEGRITY". It refers to our sense of wholeness,
of forming certain values for ourselves, and then living by those values
so that we can feel whole and at peace.
What your situation sounds like here is that perhaps you're violating
our own sense values, so issue is disturbing to you, not the least of which
is because you're feeling you're doing something which is not right.
And if you want a reason to call it off with him, then as good a reason as any
is that you're just not feeling right about this whole thing, that the secritiveness
of it and the deceptiveness of it seems to be going against even your own set
of values .... you're not being congruent with yourself, not being true to your
own values, and as such, just not feeling a sense of wholeness, or feeling
a sense of integrity with it all.
And what about him? He's not being fair to his girlfriend, not being fair to
you, and to a certain degree, not even being fair to himself.
And while his attentions towards you maybe flattering, how much attention
is he fairly showing you if he's still with his supposed girlfriend?
But the main point is that it sounds like you find yourself doing things that
are even violating your own values, or your own sense of integrity. And so
one reason you might want to stop all of this is because you perhaps want
to feel whole again.
Hope that perspective is of some help to you,
CJ | |
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| I'm the other women
Posted: 1/18/2008 2:48:35 AM | you could always get his gf in on it and encourage him to embrace polygamy
thats another out there option | |
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| I'm the other women
Posted: 1/18/2008 2:50:12 AM | besides the obvious of his behaviour being clearly wrong is your own behaviour. You already know its wrong yet you continue? This isn't meant to be presented in a negative light, but in a way that i hope you ask yourself this very question. What would drive you to do something you clearly think is not in your highest good?
What are you getting, and why is it important to you? | |
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| I'm the other women
Posted: 1/18/2008 2:54:08 AM |
you could always get his gf in on it and encourage him to embrace polygamy
thats another out there option
Yup...thunder is right on the money...
...cos if you had any brains...you'd know thats as likely a happy ending as you remotely grabbing at straws on this.
You want help?
You dont need it...you know the answer and you dont deserve sympathy after the first time it happened so anything after that is of your own making
Im sorry the advice is harsh...but its part of being an adult. | |
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| I'm the other women
Posted: 1/18/2008 3:02:14 AM | | DON'T LISTEN TO THE COQUE BLOCKERS. THEY ARE MISERABLE AND JEALOUS OF OTHER PEOPLES HAPPINESS AND WANT THE SAME FATE FOR U. HE JUST DOESN'T WANT TO BREAK ANYONES HEART. KEEP SEEING YOUR MAN BABY! | |
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| I'm the other women
Posted: 1/18/2008 3:04:30 AM | | DON'T LISTEN TO THE COQUE BLOCKERS. THEY ARE MISERABLE AND JEALOUS OF OTHER PEOPLES HAPPINESS AND WANT THE SAME FATE FOR U. HE JUST DOESN'T WANT TO BREAK ANYONES HEART. KEEP SEEING YOUR MAN BABY! | |
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| I'm the other women
Posted: 1/18/2008 3:09:02 AM | | ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^"Most women i have chatted or met off here are repulsive in every way. " WTF>>>>?????????? | |
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| I'm the other women
Posted: 1/18/2008 3:23:37 AM | You are being used..........GOD YOUR DUMB!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! | |
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| I'm the other women
Posted: 1/18/2008 3:32:26 AM |
" ...who has a girlfriend. Who I really like "
If this is how you treat people you "like", I'd hate to see how... you know the rest.
Seriously, chica-- I don't think you like yourself very much. This guy is a jerk and a half, and you are putting yourself at his mercy.
What are you gonna do when that gal you "really like" figures things out ? (it's only a matter of time) Or when you've let yourself get so hung up on this twit that you get all jealous and bothered when you see him with her?
Get it over with-- dump him, and move on. And if you can't do it face-to-face, for god sake find some way to let the other gal know what a creep she's boinking, 'cause she needs to dump him, too..... | |
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| I'm the other women
Posted: 1/18/2008 3:35:24 AM | | From someone whose been cheated on, I would like to say that it Fu***** hurts. So just remember that u r willing contributing to her pain when she finds out. Your choice is urs though and don't let anyone decide for u. Decide on what u feel is right. | |
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| I'm the other women
Posted: 1/18/2008 3:38:22 AM | | Not to mention, he probably doesn't think much of u, or her for that matter. If he did he would make a choice that other than something so hurtful to a person that cares. It is clear that being the other woman is hurting u in ways. | |
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| I'm the other women
Posted: 1/18/2008 3:38:27 AM |
I know this is gonna sound terrible. But I am sleeping with someone in college, who has a girlfriend. Who I really like.
Whats worse is he initiated it. And I know I have feelings for him too ... but I know I should call it off.
Can anyone help me?
You already know what you're doing is wrong by stating you know this is terrible. You don't care whether you are hurting this guys girlfriend who you claim to like.
Sweetie, if this is the way you treat people you like, I'd HATE to see how you treat those that you don't!!
You're character is severely lacking. None of us can help you.
And don't get me started on the slimebag you're sleeping with. | |
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| I'm the other women
Posted: 1/18/2008 3:47:18 AM | | i kind of agree with whoever said that he's just trying not to hurt anybody. thats what guys do. sometimes it makes no sense to women, and the "nice guys" of the world don't get it because they can't get one girl, nevermind two, so they're obviously just annoyed at anyone who gets anything, nevermind too much of it. but eventually, you grow up and realize that its just too much stress to maintain two relationships at once. i can barely maintain one relationship, i wouldn't ever dream of bringing another one into the mix. that would just be chaotic. and i've also realized that people do get hurt, either way you look at it. minimize the casualties and move on. you're going to hurt yourself being with him, and he's going to hurt the both of you. and on top of it, you're going to get herpes. try telling your next boyfriend that you've got an incurable std. | |
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| I'm the other women
Posted: 1/18/2008 3:59:52 AM | | I can't imagine why you're asking us to help you; you were able to get yourself into this crap and you should be able to get yourself out. But instead, your weakness continues, so no---no one can help you. I don't believe you truly want help because if you did, you'd help yourself to an ounce or twelve of self esteem, self respect, integrity, and self awareness that goes beyond your damsel in distress "oh, woe is me...I know it's terrible, what am I to do?!" bit. | |
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| I'm the other women
Posted: 1/18/2008 4:04:54 AM | Players only love you when their playing
Great song Line
So True.
If you dont love him, leave him alone. There are plenty of single blokes out there that you can "play" with.
If you do love him... you are in for some real pain in the near future. So why not get out now.
when you are 'embroiled" other good things wont happen.
do yourself a favour eh. | |
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| I'm the other women
Posted: 1/18/2008 4:13:18 AM | | if you think it sucks now, just wait til you're not the other woman and you're his girlfriend ,or worse, wife. | |
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nogo3
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Joined: 2/26/2007
Msg: 25 | |
| I'm the other women
Posted: 1/18/2008 4:13:51 AM | since you are sleeping together, just enjoy the sex while it lasts
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