| Drama Queens vs Drama Kings
Posted: 1/21/2008 5:23:14 PM | Are these major issues in relationships? How do you deal with it? Has anyone had any experience they'd like to share?
("Discussion Forum on "Women as Drama Queens" with emphasis)
I was getting a haircut the other night and I overheard someone telling another... "You know I need to have a little drama in my life."
A lot of people fall into this category. I guess it comes from a life of watching soap operas and Oprah.
These people need to FEEL something... ANYTHING... even if it is a negative, otherwise they grow bored and move on to the next guy or girl.
They feel that it sometimes pays to mix things up a little. One day be sweet and romantic, and the next day be cold and distant.
Guaranteed they'll spend HOURS on the phone dissecting and analyzing every nuance of your behavior with their friends.
They are intrigued by the changes in your behavior.
I've said it before and I'll say it again. Most people are emotional masochists. They love a little relationship drama to spice up their lives and have some challenges to overcome.
~ P. M | |
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| Drama Queens vs Drama Kings
Posted: 1/21/2008 5:26:45 PM |
I've said it before and I'll say it again. Most people are emotional masochists. They love a little relationship drama to spice up their lives and have some challenges to overcome.
I've never heard a guy say they need a good fight every once in a while, but I know several women who have told me they pick a fight with their SO just to stir things up.
It seems bizarre to me. | |
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| Drama Queens vs Drama Kings
Posted: 1/21/2008 5:27:43 PM | | Its very annoying, I know a certain girl who is a prime example. She even said herself, if theres no drama she'll start callin around gossiping until something starts. Shes maddly obsessed with 2 of my friends, and shes so jelous of them (even though neither even like her) she lies to every other girl we know about them. Its one of thoes "if I cant have em, no one can" situations as retarded as it is. But this is the crap I hear about daily.... | |
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| Drama Queens vs Drama Kings
Posted: 1/21/2008 5:29:01 PM | Either way I win OP, hate em both,  FIGHT !!!! In this corner we have some psycho emo nutjob chick. And coming out of the red corner. We have some whiny over dramatic jerkwad !!! FIGHT !!!!
:D | |
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| Drama Queens vs Drama Kings
Posted: 1/21/2008 5:33:00 PM | I've come across a select few myself.
Most people are emotional masochists[/]
I love that ... it's hillarious. You should trademark it! | |
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| Drama Queens vs Drama Kings
Posted: 1/21/2008 5:35:07 PM | iagolives, I think the question really is, would guys ever verbally say "they need a good fight every once in a while? NEVER  the ones that does are too proud to say it, but they act it out. I never imagine men could be Drama kings, until I met one | |
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| Drama Queens vs Drama Kings
Posted: 1/21/2008 5:38:04 PM | well, better than drag queen
I think those demanding drama haven't had a taste of real drama, eh? | |
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| Drama Queens vs Drama Kings
Posted: 1/21/2008 5:41:08 PM |
iagolives, I think the question really is, would guys ever verbally say "they need a good fight every once in a while? NEVER the ones that does are too proud to say it, but they act it out. I never imagine men could be Drama kings, until I met one
Oh, don't get me wrong, I'm sure there are Drama Kings out there especially as more and more boys are brought up without a solid male role model. I also know that men do fight with their SO's. I know men who've told me about some real knock 'em down drag 'em out fights with SO's or ex's (in a verbal way, not physically).
I've just never heard a guy I know say he NEEDS to have a fight every once in a while. I have heard women say that. | |
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| Drama Queens vs Drama Kings
Posted: 1/21/2008 6:53:56 PM | drama, headgames gives chances for someone to end up with somene else who does the drama and head games better than the other one(s), not necessarily the one who is right for him/her .............
So, in order to make right choices drama and all that nonsense will probably hinter it unless there are say two men or women and either one is "playing" to get the other one since the one who needs to be "gotten' can't get it otherwise. | |
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| Drama Queens vs Drama Kings
Posted: 1/21/2008 7:06:28 PM | There is a reason why you hear the term drama queen much much more than drama king.
Nuff said.
I thank you. | |
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| Drama Queens vs Drama Kings
Posted: 1/21/2008 7:14:35 PM | Personally I think only the immature or inexperienced are emotional masochists.
A truly loving and mature relationship isn't dramatic - challenging, yes, but not dramatic. A person who needs to feel pain in a relationship just so they don't get bored likely thinks at some level they don't deserve the true happiness and intimacy that comes with a loving relationship.
Either way I try to keep the drama kings out of my life. | |
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| Drama Queens vs Drama Kings
Posted: 6/15/2008 10:17:32 PM | In a lot of the men's profiles I read "no drama queens"! Since recently I have been accused of being a drama Queen I would like to air some opinions on the subject.
Every day I deal with a son 37 years old who lives with me who at 17 was diagnosed as a paranoid schizophrenic. Until about 4 years ago now he never held a permanent job. The man who donated the sperm for my children (my x husband) pretty much checked of their lives after the divorce. So no help there. My "family" for the most part could not grasp "mental illness" so my son has dealt with being in family gatherings and people staring at him, ignoring him, and a whole slew of garbage I don't even care to go in to. At present he has a job but pretty much comes home from work late at night and stays up the rest of the night and sleeps all day. Since he is asleep I am very limited to what I can accomplish during the day until he goes to work. He might speak to me when he comes downstairs or he might not. He sometimes wakes me up in the middle of the night up in his room screaming obscenities you only hear in sewers. Enough of that
My family, has pretty much deserted me because I, being divorced for 25 years have decided that I DO have the right to be married again. (And no, they are not catholic) Then there are those who are manipulated by a family member that has done nothing but cause problems in the family since as long as I can remember.
I have problems with my back that can cause pretty evere pain in different regions of my body almost daily.
So, after repeated exercises in feeling used, manipulated and lied to by a man recently, and on several other occasions, (I know, why didn't I leave it alone the 1st time....good question) yes I became a drama queen! That should be QUEEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
So shoot me!!!!!!!!
On the norm I am a very congenial person with a really good sense of humor and I seldom dwell on this crap. I have a lot of friends that I have known for most of my life. (I am 59 now)
So I'm thinking....who is really the drama queen????? | |
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| Drama Queens vs Drama Kings
Posted: 6/15/2008 10:31:58 PM | ~OP~ That's interesting. Someone wants to add a little drama? I avoid it at all costs. We have a thriving Drama Queen in our family. I want nothing to do with anyone that has something to do with her. She's toxic. An emotional vampire. No thanks.
I dated a Drama King. Dear me, I was worn out just listening to his chronic complaining, biitching, rambling about bs at work, etc. Nothing was ever right in his little world ~ that didn't last long. When I caught my eyes rolling when he would open his mouth, it was time to motivate. Nothing positive to say, add, interject or otherwise contribute???? Find your Drama-other-half!  | |
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| Drama Queens vs Drama Kings
Posted: 6/15/2008 11:12:42 PM | | I am unfortunately becoming an expert at dealing with drama queens and drama kings because for some reason, they flock to me. I think it may because they sense that I don't really have any drama in my life, so they feel the urge to share. Or because I am dumb enough to listen to everyone's problems and offer advice. Then they keep coming back! I've found the best way to deal with them is to try to avoid them as much as possible, and simply change the subject as soon as they try to bring drama. It's been a pretty effective strategy for me. | |
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| Drama Queens vs Drama Kings
Posted: 6/16/2008 12:07:39 AM | There's "emotional sharing" and then there's "drama". What the OP is talking about is pure 100%, intentional, drama.
It's all about control, and those true 'drama' queens and kings use it to establish and maintain control in relationships.
It's bullshit. Don't tolerate or encourage it. First, they'll try to use it for your benefit, but eventually, they turn it against you once they know they can. | |
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| Drama Queens vs Drama Kings
Posted: 6/16/2008 12:13:15 AM | | Drama Mamma keep on walkin', I 'm going down the happy trail. If by chance I find a cuddly, warmhearted, supportive gal on the trail and we can make each other happy, so be it, but I'm not going down misery lane for anybody. | |
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| Drama Queens vs Drama Kings
Posted: 6/16/2008 12:46:25 AM | Yeah, but real drama is saved up for special occassions, not just for any old time.
Gottsa be real drama, til the dam breaks, you know?
Not just for fun. | |
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| Drama Queens vs Drama Kings
Posted: 6/16/2008 3:05:18 AM | I was married to the King of Drama. He needed to have something to pout about, and throw a temper tantrum about (usually he felt "unloved").
I don't do drama...can't stand it.....which is why the divorce paperwork is being filed.
I also don't do grown men acting like spoiled little two year olds. | |
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| Drama Queens vs Drama Kings
Posted: 6/16/2008 10:00:57 AM | "Sensation Seekers". Seriously, there's a scale to measure it.
Me, nah. I want a nice quiet boring life. I HATE drama. Sure I"m emotional as hell. But not drama. There' s a difference between having feelings and being a drama queen.
I think the idea of "seeking" it out. Or needing some drama to be happy is what makes the difference.
People function with an "ideal" level of arousal. If they don't have it, they seek it out. If you are high on sensation seeking, your ideal is higher than others. I suspect women get this arousal more via drama in friendships/relationships and men get it more in physical activities, ie. rock climbing sports, gambling, etc. But I don't really know.
Kaylie | |
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| Drama Queens vs Drama Kings
Posted: 6/16/2008 10:48:17 AM | | i hate both...i have dropped a lot of ppl out of my life so i could have a drama free life...my life has become boring and uneventful but at least i don't have to listen to drama everywhere i go...i know too many drama queens n kings | |
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| Drama Queens vs Drama Kings
Posted: 6/16/2008 11:06:47 AM | I stay as far away from drama kings and drama queens as I possibly can. I'm not interested in hearing the "he said she said" diatribes between scorned lovers and I'm not one for gossip.
I'm not perfect but I very rarely...if ever...let myself be pulled into the gossip mill, whether at work or on the home front with my family, friends and neighbors. Just that alone eliminates most, if not all drama from your life. That...and unplugging your TV. Haha.
JMO | |
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| Drama Queens vs Drama Kings
Posted: 6/16/2008 11:15:48 AM | I'm not so sure it's just as clear cut as being, or not being dramatic. I think most of us have some strong reactions depending on which of our buttons is being pushed. Different reactions for different buttons (issues, personal or otherwise), some might provoke a reaction, or overreaction which can be construed as "drama". Drama can be more of a grey area issue than black and white.
That is opposed to someone who may be genuinely neurotic, which is a different bowl of cereal altogether. | |
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| Drama Queens vs Drama Kings
Posted: 6/16/2008 11:32:06 AM | There is a world of difference between creating drama and reacting to it. The former is what you are discussing, I believe.
Allow me to address the latter.
If you have a strong reaction to a traumatic event that is perfectly normal. Life is messy sometimes. If you plan to live a perfect, sterile, uneventful life well more power to you I suppose.
Sometimes people you care about die or get sick or seriously disappoints you. Grey areas indeed. I really dont like the concept that people should suppress their normal reactions. I have been heavily involved in hospice care and grief counseling. You can't be repressed AND healthy.
That is opposed to someone who may be genuinely neurotic, which is a different bowl of cereal altogether.
Co-sign. | |
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| Drama Queens vs Drama Kings
Posted: 6/17/2008 6:18:01 PM | Guaranteed they'll spend HOURS on the phone dissecting and analyzing every nuance of your behavior with their friends.
Kinda Like these thread(s) ...
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