Plentyoffish dating forums are a place to meet singles and get dating advice or share dating experiences etc. Hopefully you will all have fun meeting singles and try out this online dating thing... Remember that we are the largest free online dating service, so you will never have to pay a dime to meet your soulmate.
     
Show ALL Forums  > Relationships  > what does a guy mean when he says "you deserve better"?      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 hongchina
Joined: 12/12/2007
Msg: 1
what does a guy mean when he says "you deserve better"?Page 1 of 7    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7)
if a guy and a girl has chatted for a while.
they met in plentyoffish... in 2006.
and have talked for over 1 year.
. changed about 100 emails. talk one or two times per week.
they can exchange thoughts on music, life, family and many things.
quite cheerful talk.
never meet in person since they are in different c ountries.
but have spent mu ch time togther online. and have a lot of laugher together.
BUT~!
BUT the guy tells the girl, "you deserve better".
what does he mean?
thank you all.
 Love to Cruise
Joined: 12/12/2005
Msg: 2
view profile
History
what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/26/2008 5:30:44 AM
He's trying to get rid of her.
 SapphirePoet
Joined: 8/29/2007
Msg: 3
view profile
History
what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/26/2008 5:40:41 AM
Two things...
One he is being honest and knows deep down inside he is a scumbag liar and would break your heart or....
He is just trying to dump you the "nice" way without seeming cold and heartless.

Either way you need to let him go and move on.
I hope you find someone who is perfect for you and will appreciate just how "good" you are.
TC
Deb
 migivadamsbusted
Joined: 4/30/2007
Msg: 4
what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/26/2008 5:46:19 AM
for ONCE I would take the mans advice! say yes I do deserve and leave him in the snow drift.
 Medina49
Joined: 12/17/2007
Msg: 5
what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/26/2008 5:55:07 AM
Ladies can be so mean.


See, I can only speak for decent guys, as I have NO clue what dirtbags think. Birds of a feather?
So, based on what I know, which is based on who I know, which is also based on observations of my male friends around their female friends/spouses...
IF I were to say that it would mean a mild self-deprecating type of comment suggesting that the particular woman it was said to was simply an excellent person and deserved better than its humble, plain wrapped messenger.
"you're too good for me"
"you're too nice to me"
etc etc, I never really thought any woman was literally "too good" or "too nice" to me, just a subtle expression showing that I was aware just how kind and good that woman was....
 DenaliDadd
Joined: 11/20/2007
Msg: 6
view profile
History
what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/26/2008 5:56:11 AM
Simple. He means he doesn't want to have anything to do with you anymore, but knows that if he says those words, he'll be in the hospital soon, where they will be pulling the remnants of a broken tree stump out of his a**.

 breath~
Joined: 1/13/2008
Msg: 7
what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/26/2008 6:00:47 AM

BUT the guy tells the girl, "you deserve better".
what does he mean?


After over a year of "much time together online"?
It means he doesn't ever want to meet in real life.
Sorry to say, it very well could mean he already has a real life woman.
And yes, you DO deserve better if that is the case.
 Ã„lska
Joined: 12/3/2007
Msg: 8
what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/26/2008 6:19:48 AM
He means he wants out and hasn't got the balls to admit it.
 davidgeorge
Joined: 7/4/2007
Msg: 9
what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/26/2008 6:20:00 AM
I'd say he does not want to meet you! but does care about you a lot and does not want you hurt
 *~*ChardyGirl*~*
Joined: 6/29/2007
Msg: 10
what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/26/2008 6:23:38 AM
You've chatted,emailed,'wasted' endless hours with a guy who you're not going to meet,by sounds of it.....???
And,if he's said that,means he doesnt want you, but someone will..................
 bullielover62
Joined: 12/2/2006
Msg: 11
what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/26/2008 6:26:36 AM

BUT the guy tells the girl, "you deserve better".
what does he mean?

We don't know.... we're not in his head....

With that said, I would take the comment to mean he had some major issues that he hadn't divulged to you... and had no plans on doing so.

never meet in person since they are in different countries.

See?

Move on darlin'..... there are plenty of boys out there that MIGHT wanna meet you... that feel they're ready to share their good and not so good points with ya.

Who wants to waste their time with people that don't want to be with us?!?
Do you KNOW you deserve better? I hope so.....
 zom
Joined: 1/19/2008
Msg: 12
what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/26/2008 6:28:32 AM
I don't say "you deserve better", I say "you could do better". I say that as soon as I realize she is looking for someone better than myself. There is no point keeping on with a woman when you know she has mistaken you for someone better than yourself. It happens invariably with women who had a bad man last time and are holding out for a good one next time.
 outofthedesert
Joined: 12/9/2007
Msg: 13
what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/26/2008 6:35:22 AM
Why don't you ask him what he means? And make your own judgement call?
 JulietJuliet
Joined: 6/7/2007
Msg: 14
what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/26/2008 7:19:00 AM

You've chatted,emailed,'wasted' endless hours with a guy who you're not going to meet,by sounds of it.....???
.....I wouldn't call
they can exchange thoughts on music, life, family and many things.
quite cheerful talk.
wasted.
"You deserve better than me" says to me that perhaps this guy was sensing that you have developed deep feelings for him and he cannot return the favour. I agree with another poster/posters....He is letting you go gently, just as Winslet let go of De Caprio in the movie Titanic!

 SpecialLady4you
Joined: 12/11/2007
Msg: 15
what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/26/2008 7:24:33 AM
Exactly that. You live far apart from each other. Not having sex. He's getting some action where he's at and carrying on with you too. Are you getting some action? He sees no "real" relationship between the two of you. You're a friend, that's all and that's all it will be. He will carry on with whomever he has where he's at and bounce things off of you because you two have become "friends". He's trying to tell you something. Or, he's just so "insecure" with himself.
 albino_dino
Joined: 12/29/2007
Msg: 16
what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/26/2008 7:32:04 AM
It is just a lazy an unimaginative way for the guy to tell you 'he isn't interested' in you.

Most likely, he has a sexual partner. You were just someone to pass time with, someone to stroke his ego.

 El_Mariachi
Joined: 4/21/2007
Msg: 17
what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/26/2008 7:45:11 AM
All that time spent on someone in a different country?

They're both nuts.. only one of them is on his way to snapping out of it.

He probably IS trying to get rid of her, but likely only because it's finally hit him that if he wants to be with someone, they pretty much have to be a lot.. a LOT closer.
 Dark_Valentine
Joined: 12/8/2007
Msg: 18
what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/26/2008 7:47:57 AM
It means he's trying to break up with you.
 EastSideEddie
Joined: 8/13/2006
Msg: 19
what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/26/2008 7:53:19 AM
It's not you, it's me......

And factor in a little bit of "My wife/girlfriend found out I was hustling women on the side".
 quietcowboy
Joined: 12/25/2007
Msg: 20
view profile
History
what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/26/2008 7:55:04 AM
It means he is trying to feed you a line of BS and he is either trying to dump her or trying make apologies for his bad behavior. Most of the time its an extension of "Its not you, it me", line. Lines like that are why I don't even try to get closure at the end of a relationship, more than likely you will just get BS like that. Its the girl's equivalent to "Your just too nice of a guy".
 ex-navy
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 21
what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/26/2008 8:04:18 AM
Well, when I said it to somebody it meant that I was unshure that I could be everything she wanted. Now I'm millitary and well....... I'm not shure that she could be everything I want. Not to say that I wouldn't at least give her a chance if she showed interest.
 Wemble_on_KrimiaRiver
Joined: 9/18/2007
Msg: 22
what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/26/2008 8:10:47 AM
Ahh, the classic "you deserve better". It does rank right up there with the "it's not you, it's me" breakup euphemism. Since the relationship is online/email it probably means he wants to end that but just cannot come right out and say it. This is not gender exclusive because both men and women can try and take the easy way out of a relationship and attempt to backhandedly make the other person do the breaking up for their own good.
 Next Time Round
Joined: 9/16/2007
Msg: 23
what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/26/2008 8:14:19 AM
Context please? Did he say it when you were talking about the possibility of the two of you becoming a couple? Then, I agree, he's telling you to move on. It's just another variation of "it's not you, it's me." If you have ever watched the television program 'Seinfeld', you'll know what that one means. Either that or it's an open invitation to flatter him by asking, "what do you mean? How could there possibly be anyone better than you?"

On the other hand, being a journalist you may have come across many tragic events in your line of work. Or perhaps the amount of money and the standard of living you are able to provide for yourself in Beijing is what he's referring to. What country is he from? It's all about context. What was the topic of conversation when he said so?
 Blue Collar Dad
Joined: 1/6/2008
Msg: 24
what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/26/2008 8:21:04 AM
I think all of you, including the OP may be reading too much into this. First all, what was the tone of the conversation when he said it? That's the biggest question?

He may very well have been just paying you a compliment, meaning he thinks you are way out of his league (you're a better person than he is).
 SpecialLady4you
Joined: 12/11/2007
Msg: 25
what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/26/2008 8:27:35 AM

He may very well have been just paying you a compliment, meaning he thinks you are way out of his league (you're a better person than he is).


That's an "insecurity" issue. That's NOT a compliment my dear.
Show ALL Forums  > Relationships  > what does a guy mean when he says "you deserve better"?