| | Claiming To Treat You Like A Princess Or GoddessPage 1 of 7 (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7) | What do you do with those guys that claim they will treat you like A Princess? Or, A Goddess? Are they for real? What are they really saying? I believe that the stakes are very high when a man goes to such lengths as falsely making these claims in writing or verbally just to get himself a date. Don't you think that we should just be treated with the respect and integrity we deserve? A man can fool a woman that he is treating her like a Princess with "things" because he really is not a man if he does not have the respect or integrity necessary in any relationship. Actions speak louder than words!!! A man that treats a woman with respect and integrity demonstrates through these very simple actions that indeed she is a Princess, and she will feel this. Wouldn't you agree that a man that possesses these traits of respect and integrity doesn't have to make such claims, she will know and feel that she is indeed his Princess or his Goddess!!!  So, read those profiles, emails, and IM's carefully ladies. | |
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| Claiming To Treat You Like A Princess Or Goddess
Posted: 1/26/2008 9:58:00 PM | Ah good question. I suspect it's just another "nice guy" ploy. You know the same
thing as ... "I worship the ground you walk on" It's to get you to be beholden to
them, and for sure they'll expect your favours in return.
This is another passive/aggressive tactic. Yes, you are
correct that men shouldn't have to proclaim their respect for a woman.
If they do it as a proclaimation, then they have a hidden agenda. | |
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| Claiming To Treat You Like A Princess Or Goddess
Posted: 1/26/2008 10:06:34 PM | Princesses are locked away in towers, fed poison apples, or prick their fingers on spindles and sleep for 100 years.
Goddesses are most often mistreated: Zeus always cheats on Hera, and Aphrodite is labeled a whore because she is forced to marry Hephaestus but loves Ares. Persephone is stolen away by her uncle and and has to live in the underworld for part of the year.
I would rather be a queen in my own right than to be a princess.
If I am going to be a goddess, it will be a Magna Mater, the Great Mother: Inanna or Cybele, maybe even Isis. Inanna zapped Dumuzi for not mourning her; Cybele castrated Attis for being unfaithful. Isis and Osiris actually loved each other.
(By the way, guys, Dumuzi and Attis had happy endings; they were both granted reprieves and got to live with their wives again--having learned their lessons.) | |
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| Claiming To Treat You Like A Princess Or Goddess
Posted: 1/26/2008 10:08:02 PM | "I tell the ladies right up front that I'm a crumb bum.They never believe me though."
Now that you have proclaimed this in a public forum,I can assure you they will believe you now.
What is a crumb bum? | |
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| Claiming To Treat You Like A Princess Or Goddess
Posted: 1/26/2008 10:14:52 PM |
What is a crumb bum?
Someone not of good character.
I've heard other's define it as someone who is cheap. In Catcher in the Rye, when Holden pays the hooker five bucks, she called him a Crumb-bum; maybe because he was cheap, or maybe because he didn't have sex with her.
Now that you have proclaimed this in a public forum,I can assure you they will believe you now.
Nope. They won't. | |
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| Claiming To Treat You Like A Princess Or Goddess
Posted: 1/26/2008 10:47:13 PM | | I'll treat someone like I want to be treated--- I'm not going to crown anyone, and I'm not going to fall down and worship anyone... but I've never had any complaints. I like to make people happy--- but not out of "duty." If that makes any sense.... | |
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| Claiming To Treat You Like A Princess Or Goddess
Posted: 1/26/2008 11:06:40 PM | I can't imagine doing this.
Also, if a woman writes in her profile, "I just want a man who will treat me like a princess" it is an instant turnoff and I will almost never contact her.
I had a good friend who was telling me about the wonderful guy who she had met, was treating her "like a princess" etc etc etc yada yada. I sat there and listened to this, and finally I said to her, "And what do you do for him?"
She gave me a bit of stunned look, and was silent. Of course, the answer was (although she didn't say it): "I have sex with him." Thats it. Thats all he got from her. He eventually got her pregnant and dumped her.
The OP is dead right- If I see a woman mention the word "respect" in her profile, I take notice. Respect in a relationship is utmost. | |
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| Claiming To Treat You Like A Princess Or Goddess
Posted: 1/26/2008 11:32:32 PM |
Princesses are locked away in towers, fed poison apples, or prick their fingers on spindles and sleep for 100 years.
Goddesses are most often mistreated: Zeus always cheats on Hera, and Aphrodite is labeled a whore because she is forced to marry Hephaestus but loves Ares. Persephone is stolen away by her uncle and and has to live in the underworld for part of the year.
Gwen beat me to it.
My response is always "I am a WOMAN baby, can you handle it?" | |
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| Claiming To Treat You Like A Princess Or Goddess
Posted: 1/26/2008 11:40:11 PM |
What do you do with those guys that claim they will treat you like A Princess? Or, A Goddess? Are they for real?
Laugh at them, because that’s some of the oldest lines in the book. Stupidest, too!
When I care for someone, I’ll say that I will treat her as my best friend and welcome companion: an equal. Because, that is exactly what I will do.
If someone wants to be a “princess” or “goddess,” I’ll just laugh and walk away because that tells me that she has too many unrealistic expectations to be a good friend.
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Gwendolyn: Inanna (Ishtar in the Bible) was not the “great mother.” She never even had children. However, she was known as the goddess of love and war. Her lover and husband, Dumuzi, died by accident while being captured by the sheriffs of his older brother, Marduk, because Dumuzi was trying to procreate with a younger sister. The oldest song and poem known to man describes the love between Inanna and Dunuzi and was written in ancient Sumer well over seven thousand years ago.
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| Claiming To Treat You Like A Princess Or Goddess
Posted: 1/26/2008 11:40:17 PM | You are absolutely gorgeous to me, are you really 50? Hard to tell.
Oops there I go with that pedestal thing again.
Seriously, I don't put a woman up on a pedestal anymore. It always leads to pain. I love myself too much today to do that to myself anymore. I believe in sharing mutual self respect.
The whole pedestal thing seems so immature to me now, like; "gosh will you really go to the prom with me?" ........"Gee wizz"......"Can I really worship you?"......I mean where does my dignity and self respect come into this sort of behavior?
The ideal partner can accept being treated as my equal, niether higher nor lower than myself. Treat her the way I'd like to be treated. I also believe we must teach others how to treat us. This means we must be true to ourselves first. She'd almost be like one of the guys. One of the guys that I happen to be having sex with and bringing flowers to once in a while.
Errr that didn't quite sound right but you know what I mean, right?
Mike | |
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| Claiming To Treat You Like A Princess Or Goddess
Posted: 1/26/2008 11:43:09 PM | RE: First post.
You're totally right hun. Its a line. Guys like telling women what they want to hear. Why? Because it usually works. Its like you said, actions speak louder than words. I dont make promises to my ladies. I just treat them they way Id like to be treated. | |
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| Claiming To Treat You Like A Princess Or Goddess
Posted: 1/27/2008 4:51:55 AM | I have found that the guys who throw around the words princess and goddess are usually not worth it. Mostly, they're of the "I'm a nice guy who all the girls reject for a bad boy" type, and I hate guys like that.
Also, guys throw around those words if they're either players or desperate. A genuine guy won't use such grandiose terms, and will be a little more low key until he falls for you.
My current boyfriend never said any princess or goddess thing, never claimed in his profile about how nice and great he is to women, never identified himself as a nice guy, never made references to how women done him wrong, and he's the keeper who actually does treat me like gold. | |
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| Claiming To Treat You Like A Princess Or Goddess
Posted: 1/27/2008 5:26:41 AM | It's just their way of getting your attention. Once they have it,they take you for granted. Not all men are that way,mind you,but some. Been there done that with one here. | |
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| Claiming To Treat You Like A Princess Or Goddess
Posted: 1/27/2008 5:29:40 AM | rule of thumb in life, both online and offline....
believe half of what you see and half of what you hear.
things arent always what they appear to be or sound like on the surface most of the time.
respect and trust on a personal level takes time. you dont just give it to someone you barely know...just like romantic love is withheld til you find the feeling mutual.
integrity is one of those things that costs you nothing to show and nothing to instill in others by your actions, and doesnt need to be a mutual feeling before one shows it to the world.
the only one that will ever treat you like the royalty you are is YOURSELF! | |
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| Claiming To Treat You Like A Princess Or Goddess
Posted: 1/27/2008 5:40:10 AM | I'm always coming across profiles written by women where they clearly state along the lines of "I want to be wined, dined and treated like a princess". 
How off putting if that? It just proves how materialistic and superficial some women are in the initial stages of dating, it's like women will expect the man to pay for everything then judge them on the size of their wallet and what gifts they receive without focusing on the person they are meant to be interested in. | |
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| Claiming To Treat You Like A Princess Or Goddess
Posted: 1/27/2008 5:51:57 AM | When I see or hear these words from a man I question where in his past it's coming from. It seems to me that usually they were in a relationship with a self-proclaimed princess who felt that everyone should treat her this way, and they were walked all over like a doormat. They usually have wasted a ton of energy on people like this without getting much in return.
Aside from the obvious things like respect and integrity, when someone new comes out with all these grand gestures right at first, it seems contrived. I like doing nice things for the people I love too. But I don't go advertising it, because if I love you, you'll get it.
Just be kind and treat me how you'd like to be treated until we are in that part of the relationship where it's earned so to speak. I don't want someone spending all kinds of money on me, taking me shopping, nice dinners just because that's how he treats every other woman. I want him to do nice things for me because I'm me. | |
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| Claiming To Treat You Like A Princess Or Goddess
Posted: 1/27/2008 5:52:19 AM | I have mostly seen, "I treat my women like a queen".
First of all, it reads like they have a harem. It took me while to realize that "women" was really "woman"; the singular form of the noun just seems to have disappeared or, more likely, it is a problem with spelling.
But when it comes to that statement it is often qualified by statements about not wanting a woman who is interested in his bank account or what kind of car he drives.
I was actually scolded for asking a guy what he did for a living (small talk) as being inappropriate. I was mystified and asked him to explain why. He claimed that asking what a guy does for a living is a ploy to figure out how much they make. Yet he found it okay to pose a question about my figure.
Ok. So acceptable topics are the weather, what I do for "fun", how soon can we meet...
I personally am not impressed by cars. They are not interesting to me. Just please have one, preferable one color. And having an expensive car doesn't mean one has money anyway. It more than likely means he is heavily in debt.
There again, I don't care about the guy's bank account, just please be able to support yourself. I don't need or want someone to support me.
"Queen" - they can't do it. So many guys can't even call when they say they are going to call, so I wouldn't believe statements like that. Some guys are deluded. If their previous realtionship ended badly, they probably don't think they did a thing wrong if they are making statements like that. Why would any "women" get rid of a guy who "treats them like a queen?" And I'd be willing to be that if I were to ask them to elaborate on exactly what "treating my women like a queen" means, they'd be speechless or run. And I don't think I would be able to refrain from bustin on the use of the word "women". | |
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| Claiming To Treat You Like A Princess Or Goddess
Posted: 1/27/2008 5:59:34 AM | I'm curious...what ever happened to trust, folks? I realize 'some' use these things as a ploy, but I also know some say things like that, and they truly mean that they want to treat you well -- nothing more, nothing less. You know I heard my significant other say many times, that he will always treat me like a princess, because he considered me as beautiful and sweet as one. He said that forever, to me. He didn't act differently, so...why would I find that an unattractive trait, or word, in anyone else's profile?
I guess it depends on if you see the glass as half full or half empty. Personally, I would rather believe that someone was serious about treating me special, which is the way many really mean that. If words have no meaning, or they're twisted into a derogatory sense now a days, how can one trust anything that anyone says?
Maybe people are just becoming a bit jaded, because they're accustomed to disecting every word that's said, turning it into something permanently negative, just because 'someone else' in their lives might have said it in a negative way. What about all the ones that don't mean it in a negative way? Should we shun everyone because this one is too fat, or thin, or old or young; bald or hairy, or maybe they said: princess or prince, lovely or kind, sweet or sensitive? Where does it stop?
Is that the type of society we've become...callous, cold, uncaring...all due to a simple word that can be perceived in so many different ways, to mean so many different things? Maybe, just maybe, before we condemn one another for fear of what COULD BE, rather than what is, maybe we should all just stop and think and realize that it's just a word, and it might not be meant as anything we thought previously. | |
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| Claiming To Treat You Like A Princess Or Goddess
Posted: 1/27/2008 7:08:53 AM | Actually, it is a complete sentence: it has a subject and a predicate 
But I see what you are saying. I thought it might have been a statement referring to the past, too, until I read further or even communicated with one of the guys who wrote it and I never inferred past tense.
I am not sure I understand your paragraph about "more than average" unless you are talking about lifestyles that people are used to. Settling for status quo is not a goal, of course, settling is certainly not a good thing in a relationship either. I am not sure what else you meant, though. Status quo materially-speaking?
Yes, some people don't like nice. Many, many (ugh) years ago my friend and I used to joke that we didn't like "nice guys". That was then, this is now. It was funny then, it would be pathetic now.
You wrote:
"Now that is just untrue. If you treat your man good and he dumps you then it most be your fault?"
Your statement is true but too deep. This is a forum and we are generalizing.
afx777 wrote:
"I'm always coming across profiles written by women where they clearly state along the lines of "I want to be wined, dined and treated like a princess".
How off putting if that? It just proves how materialistic and superficial some women are in the initial stages of dating, it's like women will expect the man to pay for everything then judge them on the size of their wallet and what gifts they receive without focusing on the person they are meant to be interested in."
This is a good example of a generation gap. While I agree anyone who states she wants to be treated like a princess is a put-off, "wining and dining" has meant "effort, attention, wooing" in the past. Now "guys" see it as materialistic. So if you open the car door for a woman, does she have to tip you?
I taught my sons to always pay on their dates, with the exception that if a relationship evolves there may be a more mutual form of spending. Guess who had to foot THAT bill a few times before they really started earning? But the point is, it is a sign of respect, a tradition that has lasted years. It doesn' t have to be the most expensive 5 star restaurant - it can be a box of wine and a picnic basket.
Unfortunately, I don't always get "wined and dined". I may get "whined" to death. And I have paid the check plenty of times on the first and/or subsequent dates, often relieved to just get the h**l out of there. Gloria Steinhem was a pioneer, but she did some of us women and injustice because guys have told me they just ASSUME women don't want doors open for them and make reference to Women's Lib.
If I meet someone for dinner or coffee for the first time, I will automatically go for my wallet. Sometimes I pay, sometimes they do. The ones who insist I put it away make a better impression on me. | |
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