| Guys with big egos
Posted: 1/27/2008 9:40:53 AM | | Recently, I met this amaaazing guy on pof, the one problem was he lived three hours away from me. We met up a couple times and it was magic both times, everything was great. He kept telling me how he had never thought he'd find a girl on this site and was surprised when I came around. He wanted to try a long distance relationship. So when it came down to it I started to realize this guy had a huge ego. I mean, he was a ladies man in college and was used to probably dating several girls at one time. It felt like I wasnt enough for him. He continued to talk on pof and said he couldn't change his relationship status due to a bet. That was the icing on the cake, I had to let him go. But my question is, why do guys continue to have these huge egos as they grow into adulthood, do they every grow out of them? Will he ever grow up or will he always fantasize about being with several girls at the same time? | |
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| Guys with big egos
Posted: 1/27/2008 9:46:43 AM | | Why? Because they haven't put the effort into developing their personalities in order to have an adult relationship. | |
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| Guys with big egos
Posted: 1/27/2008 9:47:43 AM | You are generalizing
You gender bash
There is no telling what he will always do | |
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| Guys with big egos
Posted: 1/27/2008 9:49:47 AM | | What I am telling about him is all true, its from what he told me about his life and from what I experienced with him. | |
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| Guys with big egos
Posted: 1/27/2008 9:54:09 AM | Your only generalising here was not to add the word 'some' into one of your sentences OP.
The rest is about one person..so no worries.
He won't change..he is insecure and needs/craves attention from the sound of it. | |
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| Guys with big egos
Posted: 1/27/2008 9:57:05 AM | | Men aren't the only ones with big egos, OP. I've met plenty of women who do as well. | |
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| Guys with big egos
Posted: 1/27/2008 10:04:05 AM | Jupiter...ego is just the icing on the cake! I have met guys like this and what it boils down to is they can't commit to one girl. You are fortunate to get out before you got your feelings hurt. I don't think you were gender bashing...he most likely won't ever outgrow it, until he has hair in his ears, and a forest in his nose, can't get his libido jump started...not even with a electrical charger and can't find a date LOL! He wasn't so amazing.....keep looking..I think you will find a prince...this guy wasn't even frog status! | |
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| Guys with big egos
Posted: 1/27/2008 10:16:40 AM | | OP - I noticed from your profile that you are 21. If the guy is close to your age, I dont know if this is ego or just youth. | |
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| Guys with big egos
Posted: 1/27/2008 10:22:31 AM | But my question is, why do guys continue to have these huge egos as they grow into adulthood, do they every grow out of them?
I'm sorry, but an ego doesn't have a gender behind it. It has a negative life experience behind it(Either that, or their parents did a horrible job at raising their kid, and it's a learned behavior that they got from a parent).
It's kind of like a Napoleon complex. You go through life feeling inferior, so have to constantly inflate your ego, to bring up you up higher than the people you come across. Usually people like this, were teased during grade school or highschool, and are making up for it.
I've found more women with immense egoes, than men, but it's definetly not all of them. If you find yourself attracting nothing but men with huge egoes and notice a patterning in the men you attract. Sorry to say, but it's you.
Do they grow out of it? Of course. They won't look great and youthful forever.
Once their youth runs out, they tend to humble themselves quite a bit, or end up 40 or older, still clubbing amongst people half their age, not letting go of their youth, and pathetic. | |
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| Guys with big egos
Posted: 1/27/2008 10:25:26 AM | Huge egos don't always equate to the need to date multiple women at once.
Actually, the reverse is true. Men who feel inadequate about themselves tend to be the ones who require more than one woman at a time. | |
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| Guys with big egos
Posted: 1/27/2008 10:25:36 AM | | I agree with sj365, men find it very difficult to commit even at middle age, so if he is in his 20s hes wanting to play the field so to speak. Maybe you might start to date guys a little older with more maturity if your looking for a long term relationship. Good to see you have enough self respect to walk away. | |
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| Guys with big egos
Posted: 1/27/2008 10:29:34 AM |
I dont know if this is ego or just youth.
Agreed. In their early 20's most guys primary relationships are with their buddies. Most of his friends are still not married and he probably spends more free time with the guys than with his girl. In fact, most of the time with his girl is probably spent with hanging out with his buddies. What does he do on weekends? He and a girlfriend probably go someplace with his buddies and their girlfriends.
You are at the age where you are much more mature than the boys your age as far as being ready for relationships and even relating to one another, for that matter. Most guys (but there are exceptions) don't get to your level of emotional maturity until their late 20's. You can watch it start to happen as the group of buddies begins to form serious relationships with women and the group slowly evaporates losing first one member and then another and another as the boys pair up and have less time to spend out at the lake with the boys. Then there will be that final one or two who realize that all their friends are married or engaged and they don't have steady girlfriends.
My guess is he might be serious relationship material in about 4 or 5 more years. | |
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| Guys with big egos
Posted: 1/27/2008 10:31:50 AM | Why do people have such big egos?
Easy. b/c they keep attracting people like you with them.
No one fixes what works. If he stopped attracting women who would put up with anything in order to have a man in their lives, then he'd have to change. why? Well, what does he have the ego for? to attempt to fill the gap in his self knowledge. Why does he have all those partners for? The same attempt. so if the ego got in the way, he'd lose it and try something else. | |
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| Guys with big egos
Posted: 1/27/2008 10:40:38 AM |
He continued to talk on pof and said he couldn't change his relationship status due to a bet.
What was the bet, that he’s an asshat? If so, tell him he’s won the pot, but won’t get to feed the “kitty”. | |
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| Guys with big egos
Posted: 1/27/2008 10:47:31 AM | The Human EGO (Both Genders) is what is responsible for
most human misery! That's a fact, believe it or not! | |
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| Guys with big egos
Posted: 1/27/2008 10:51:38 AM | | They project superior but underneath it they are inferior and it is their defense,,, | |
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| Guys with big egos
Posted: 1/27/2008 11:16:23 AM | lol RE: First post.
No worries, they usually learn their error when they're old lonely men. ^_^ I believe they call that poetic justice. | |
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| Guys with big egos
Posted: 1/27/2008 11:34:54 AM | | Im 24 and I dont have a huge ego, but I do have my pride and those are two very different things. | |
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| Guys with big egos
Posted: 1/27/2008 11:48:32 AM | Be very careful!
Pride and Ego are two very close cousins!
Now, self esteem which breeds self confidence is a little different! | |
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| Guys with big egos
Posted: 1/27/2008 11:59:00 AM | Women cause me having a big ego, lots of them hitting on me down the year...I try not let it get to my head so i just go with the flow | |
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| Guys with big egos
Posted: 1/27/2008 12:05:21 PM | This is not only in men in there 20's I have met a few in the early and mid 30's who are totally like this. I think myself at 24 and a single mom I am more mature than to keep seeking out people after I feel I am with one person. I am sorry but I could have never kept them apart if I had multiple.
I think for now guys on POF are looking for a one night good time and if they aren't they are very rare. No worries you weren't male bashing you were speaking the truth.
Happy fishing and hope everyone finds whom they are looking for!
Lily | |
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| Guys with big egos
Posted: 1/27/2008 12:09:30 PM |
why do guys continue to have these huge egos as they grow into adulthood
I think the others are right about you generalizing about men due to an individual experience.
Going by your story he sounded a little emotionally immature...
However you did a lot of assuming in your post.. | |
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| Guys with big egos
Posted: 1/27/2008 12:12:26 PM | A lot of people with low self esteem view people with healthy self esteem as being vane or egotistical .. its just perception .. If youlove yourself it doesn't really matter.
A.S.is
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| Guys with big egos
Posted: 1/27/2008 12:15:53 PM |
I think for now guys on POF are looking for a one night good time and if they aren't they are very rare.
Yes....iam a rare breed.....prefer to connect on an emotional level first.
Maybe Iam going about it the wrong way | |
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| Guys with big egos
Posted: 1/27/2008 12:20:50 PM | He got lucky with you, if you have common sense then maybe you should dump him. Meeting someone on here takes a lot of effort and trust, I don't think I could meet anyone on here, simply becasue anyone and everyone joins it, so your not sure if someone is just on here to fool around.
As far as I am concerned, this is not a dating site but a social networking site, it trys to be so much of everything that it fails.
As for having a huge ego, I don't think so, it's about getting affection... | |
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