| To those that have found love.....
Posted: 1/30/2008 9:34:06 AM | Did you find love or did love find you?
I have been in love, 1 time. It completely found me. He was someone I would have never imagined myself being with physically, but wow, it was so perfect and right for the time.
Sometimes, I think online dating is a waste of time when it comes to finding love. In my experience, love finds you not the other way around.
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| To those that have found love.....
Posted: 1/30/2008 9:45:17 AM | The place where you find true love is of no importance, it may hit you anywhere at any times.
Did I found true Love? Yes I did, in fact, it found me. (am not a "chaser")
Did I lost it? Yes I did, for many variables and reasons that I do not want to explain....or that I quite understand myself.
Anything can happen! | |
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| To those that have found love.....
Posted: 1/30/2008 9:54:31 AM | I have never found "true love". I have loved men and they have loved me but its never been that all encompassing true love. Scary thought since i was married for eight years isnt it? Meh, I settled. Won't be doing that again lemme tell ya.
It usually found me although I can be a "chaser" in terms of making first contact etc. but generally I am pretty laid back so I prefer to be pursued somewhat. Since I have never had it, no I havent lost it. | |
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| To those that have found love.....
Posted: 1/30/2008 10:11:09 AM | I didn't have any problems initiating contact on-line, however, my guy did initiate the first contact with me here on PoF. Sent me a dig about something I'd said and we were off and running...lol Definitely a case of "begin as you mean to go". So online has NOT been a waste of time for us... you never know.
It's love. *gasp* Did I say that out loud? I spent months telling him "yeah, we love each other, but it is early days yet, let's just let everything unfold and see where it evolves in the fullness of time"
(middlin' days now, right sweetie?!! hehee) | |
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| To those that have found love.....
Posted: 1/30/2008 10:19:31 AM | Maybe love finds you because you have put yourself somewhere to be found.
I don't remember if I saw it online somewhere or leafing through one of those find a husband in 30 days books, but it suggested mentioning to your friends and family that you are really actively looking. People complain about blind dates but sometimes it at least gives you something to talk about and people that know you are not going to set you up with an ass.
That is part of making yourself available and while people know you are single, so many hate being set up that they may know the right person and never say anything to you. You don't have to be on here 24/7 to allow people to find you and isn't that what you are talking about? It is just a different way to be found. | |
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| To those that have found love.....
Posted: 1/30/2008 10:22:29 AM | I suppose technically, love found me because I was unwilling to get out of my "you gotta live this close" comfort zone. Back in September I got the nicest message from a fellow fishie. He lived about 3 hours away, so I was like "oh, how sweet, but it'll never go anywhere." A couple of hours later, I decided to reply to his message. We met in person two weeks later, the chemistry was amazing, the conversation flowed and the rest is history. I'm moving to Wichita next week ...  | |
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| To those that have found love.....
Posted: 1/30/2008 10:46:28 AM | I can't decide if it found me or I found it...maybe we just grew it, much like a pregnancy?
Though we met here, we'd lived 5 minutes apart for 20 years. | |
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| To those that have found love.....
Posted: 1/30/2008 11:28:04 AM | | In my case at least, it seems the more I chase it, the more elusive it proves to be. The few times in my life I've been fortunate enough to be in love, it always seems like it found me and smacked me in the head, when I was least expecting it. I am due for another surprise any time now...lol | |
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| To those that have found love.....
Posted: 1/30/2008 12:41:19 PM | | I have found love twice the way to do it is to open yourself up completely and surrender and not be afraid to get hurt | |
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| To those that have found love.....
Posted: 1/30/2008 1:03:33 PM | The first time love found me. And taught me what loving is about.. I agree that unless you put away all your fears and open up completely for the other person, you won't be able to love fully. I lost it because, I guess, that's the way it was supposed to be.
The second time.. ok, it found us again. And this time I hope it's gonna get comfy in my life..
Everyone needs something different from a partner. We (sub)consciously look to fulfill our expectations.. And so some of us stumble upon love, and sometimes it is something that develops.. I only learnt that it doesn't come just because I want it. It caught me unaware each time..
Online dating is a waste of time only if you allow it.. It depends on what you expect it to give you.
It's not any better way of meeting people than real life, even if it seems so.. | |
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| To those that have found love.....
Posted: 1/30/2008 1:14:05 PM | If it doesn't find me, it's not gonna happen, so yes I have - and it's found me. I don't hunt, when you hunt, it's because you think it's missing. When you think something's missing you tend to not look at things clearly and make bad choices...
I have gradually ended up there, but I don't ever plan it (or go willingly). | |
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| To those that have found love.....
Posted: 1/30/2008 5:54:47 PM | | I believe that too, OP. Yet POF gives me a second chance in a weird sort of way at socializing like one typically does in high school. I attended college 20 years after I graduated, so I was the odd one out in a class of young people. In this school of fish tho, it's as if all the different grades have been thrown in together, and I'm learning a great deal about life and love - of every different type - on a daily basis. I don't know why, but I'm convinced all this expressing myself is somehow going to help me when he does find me. | |
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skit.y
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Joined: 10/23/2007
Msg: 17 | |
| To those that have found love.....
Posted: 1/30/2008 6:04:59 PM | | nycdoctor - excellent summation - do not afraid to get hurt, so simple but yet so many find it so difficult | |
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| To those that have found love.....
Posted: 2/1/2008 3:18:41 PM | Re: nycdoctor- I too agree with you. You just have to decide you are not going to be afraid to get hurt, let walls come down, and just let things happen. When it seems "too good to be true" and you begin to doubt...STOP IT. This could be the very time where true love has found you. Enjoy and treasure the gift that you was sent to you. 
~TLC | |
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| To those that have found love.....
Posted: 2/1/2008 5:04:03 PM | Ggirl101 wrote:
I have been in love, 1 time. It completely found me. He was someone I would have never imagined myself being with physically, but wow, it was so perfect and right for the time.
Well, Ggirl, I salute you.  You actually found love with someone you would not have imagined yourself with physically. So many here would dismiss a person for reasons far less significant and piddly than that. As to your question, I think that somebody once said, "Seek and you shall find", but there is also serendipity. Sometimes you find money on the ground when you are not looking for it because overall it would be silly to walk around looking for change on the sidewalk. Sure, you might find it, but you'd also probably run into a lot of people. | |
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| To those that have found love.....
Posted: 2/1/2008 6:55:13 PM | I found love right here on POF. My sweetie and I have been together for almost a year and a half.
I sent him the initial message. I kept seeing his beautiful face on that strip of photos above my inbox. However, he lived in another city, and I was only willing to date someone nearby. But his sexy smile won, and I messaged him, and the rest is history.
So, I guess love found him........... | |
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| To those that have found love.....
Posted: 2/1/2008 7:20:41 PM | If love found me, I would be like the deer in the headlights. Love never hit me like a thunder bolt or baseball bat ... usually, I'm too friendly, busy and usually don't take it seriously
The last time, he had to actually interrupt me and say that he would like to date me. but something went wrong. | |
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| To those that have found love.....
Posted: 2/1/2008 11:51:49 PM | gardennut wrote:
...However, he lived in another city, and I was only willing to date someone nearby. But his sexy smile won, and I messaged him, and the rest is history.
Here is another example of a somebody who was willing to be flexible in person they seek. There are many here at POF who are unwilling to compromise on things which could be compromised. If they are only willing to date somebody who lives close to them, then that person had damn well better live nearby. So many people are either too, too this or not enough that. If they loosened up some of their overly tight restrictions they migh actually find somebody, but maybe it is success they fear.
As Tolken wrote concerning Aragorn in The Lord of the Rings, a man who was actually destined to be the king but looked like a ranger in the wild: "All that is gold does not glitter, not all who wander are lost", so it is here at POF when some allow one facet of a person on their profile to overwhelm all else, not recognizing who, for them, is gold. Then they bemoan the poverty and dearth of any good men or women. | |
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