| How do you get over someone
Posted: 2/6/2008 10:41:14 AM | | I'm curious about all the various ways people get over a really serious relationship and moved on? What were somethings that you did in your healing stage that helped you the most. This was serious relationship and I think if we worked through some issues we could have been married and really happy. Unfortunately I pulled the plug when she just shut down and failed to communicate. She appeared to me as a person that reached a crossroad where she didn't know what she wanted so I gave her time to try and figure it out. We still talk and I see that she is doing no work in trying figure it out, she says she loves me but in this case actions speak louder than words. | |
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| How do you get over someone
Posted: 2/6/2008 11:03:12 AM | I got over my ex by going through all of the emotions before doing anything. I cried for 3 straight days. I then got angry for about a week. I listened to my breakup song until I could no longer cry to it. You know you are over the person once you can listen to your "song" and breakup "song" without crying. Mine was Mariah Carey's "Butterfly" for the breakup and Hoobastank's "The Reason" for our song.
We were together for 2 and a half years...he had my engagement ring and everything. He decided that World of Warcraft was more important than our relationship. So getting over him didn't take me too long. I think I was over him in about a month? I was dating within 2 weeks of us breaking up. He's already in a new relationship and that's fine. Meanwhile I'm not settling for the first thing that comes my way.
I think everyone is different in their ways of healing from breakups. My way is to just go through my own grieving process...the crying...the anger...the acceptance. Depends on how you are, how long the process takes. Sometimes it can take a few weeks...to a few months...to years. | |
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| How do you get over someone
Posted: 2/6/2008 2:17:45 PM | | It takes time. I don't think there's any point to rush yourself. Until you meet someone and can really see yourself getting close to them, you shouldn't involve other people. Take time, learn to be on your own again. Get out all of the emotions, cry your eyes out, and then you will start to see much more clearly. Make a list of everything that went wrong and why the issues couldn't be resolved, and keep that list close to you at all times. Read it, re-read it, believe it. Hope you feel better soon :) | |
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| How do you get over someone
Posted: 2/6/2008 2:47:24 PM | | Everybodys different but I started to get into myself more. Working out and exercise. Its great for stress and keeps you healthy. As well as the outside I also started taking care of the inside. Reading the bible, having faith and such. Never let anyone bring you down. Love yourself and others will love you. If they dont love you than dont sweat it. Someone will. | |
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| How do you get over someone
Posted: 2/6/2008 2:57:21 PM | The messag above me said it pretty well.
You Will be on your feet again... Realize that "healing" yourself from the inside out is the best AND the fastest way to come back full swing.
Go out with the guys. Stay away from females (i really mean "relationships")
for a while. Dont get into "flings" or just one night stands. They don't solve anything either
Focus on you. On your worth. On God. He will give you direction. 
Bottomline,
If a woman can live without you, let her  | |
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| How do you get over someone
Posted: 2/6/2008 3:42:15 PM | My ex-boyfriend literally ripped my heart out when he broke up with me in August 2006. We had been together for over 2 and 1/2 years.
The first 4 months I cried almost every night and just managed to go to work and do the necessary life things.
The next 6 months, I finally accepted he wasn't coming back and started of thinking of life without him. The following 2 months, I healed enough to realize it wasn't about me and that I had a lot to offer to a new relationship.
So, all said and done, it took me a full year to get over him.
Everyone has their own pace, so just take care of you and find some peace and happiness while you are healing.
Take care,
~~weeone~~ | |
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| How do you get over someone
Posted: 2/6/2008 4:27:06 PM | | I always heard the general rule of thumb to get over a break up is about half the length of time you were in the relationship. If you were together for a year then it will take approximately 6 months. It's always seemed pretty accurate from people I have talked to. Fortunately, I don't think I've ever really had my heart broken....a bruised ego a few times but never really a broken heart. | |
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| How do you get over someone
Posted: 2/6/2008 4:39:12 PM |
Unfortunately I pulled the plug when she just shut down and failed to communicate. She appeared to me as a person that reached a crossroad where she didn't know what she wanted so I gave her time to try and figure it out.
No need to waste your time to figure it out,shes got some past issues and just let her go and
hopefully she will get some help and remember it's got nothing to do with you as a person.
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| How do you get over someone
Posted: 2/6/2008 4:44:50 PM | | the best way to get over someone is get up on someone else happy hunting your free again | |
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| How do you get over someone
Posted: 2/6/2008 4:49:26 PM | Someone once told me the best way to get over someone is to get under someone else, but that doesn't really solve anything. It might complicate your life even more, but the only thing that will mend a broken heart is time. That could take 2 weeks, 2 months or 2 years, the choice is yours. 
Pink | |
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| How do you get over someone
Posted: 2/6/2008 5:06:32 PM | Instead of thinking what went wrong, why, how... what should I do...?
Try using your time wisely. Meaning, less time thinking about your just bye relationship, and using that time in something that keeps you busy (one or many activities). Some of the above users have already mentioned a few: Workout, writing, reading, renewing your faith, volunteer work, complete all of those unfinish shores all over your house/work, help that friend that needed some tutoring in whatever and which you can help. solve that Soduku and Crosswords you had not been able to solve and much more. And when you less expect it, there will be a brand new day for you!!!
Good luck! | |
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| How do you get over someone
Posted: 2/6/2008 5:09:02 PM | In my experience sometimes we loose ourselves in relationships and although it is difficult if you concentrate on yourself and what you need why you were unhappy
and try to put that energy into what will make youself productive then it gets
easier to move on! We do ourselves a grave injustice when we concentrate on
the person that stole our joy in the first place! When we watch all the things they
do after a realtionship, we still are focusing on them so to move on/ to get over someone we must move on to another mind set and start focusing on ourselves! | |
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| How do you get over someone
Posted: 2/6/2008 5:10:57 PM | | A wise woman once said..."the easiest way to get over a man is to get under another one." lol (we'll just say that applies to women too!) But unfortunately it's not always that easy...time is really a great healer and u just have to go thru the motions. Someone on here said it usually takes 1/2 the time of the relationship..probably a good guide...but then again.... I was married for 16 years..does that mean it will take my ex 8 yrs to get over me?! lol Good luck. | |
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| How do you get over someone
Posted: 2/6/2008 5:16:42 PM | I have read all comments with interest as I am NOT in a position to provide any words of wisdom on this subject .... my heart was broken last March & still mending to this day ... fortunately I found myself a good therapist & really great drugs seem to be bringing me back into the land of the living 
Open your arms to change, but don't let go of your values.
Dalai Lama | |
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| How do you get over someone
Posted: 2/6/2008 5:19:05 PM | go another one ~ quick as possible
or ????
Think about it ~ figure out ~ how you `Fu~ked Up!
and then go get another one ` quick as possible
~dar | |
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| How do you get over someone
Posted: 2/6/2008 5:25:06 PM | | wow its not easy and takes alot of time. my 16 year relationship with the man i was married to took me over 3 years to get over and it was hell. I started dating allmost right after but it didnt help. Our relationship couldnt be helped but if urs can dont throw it away too easily its not easy to find love like that. I never have found it again. Talk, do what u can. | |
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| How do you get over someone
Posted: 2/6/2008 5:33:06 PM | Great question. My case sounds almost like yours, we had too much geographical distance for one, my life kept me from going to see her as often as I wanted, she started to become distant, but we had a great love. She shut down while I was visiting, I felt hurt and left to come home, a 4 hr drive thru a snow storm and white out. We finally did talk but things had changed because of that night. In our case we tried to let each other down easy, over a year and a half's time, we had a good friendship. I realized she couldn't close the door, so I gave her the out. She took it. I will always be in love with her. I went thru the usual, the shock, the anger, the hurt, I reclused myself emotionally but kept up with my social friends.
A wise old man once told me that when we lose a love we don't "get over" it, we get on... with life. Part of getting on with my life is admitting and accepting what we had, how wonderful it was and what happened. Now it's a warm memory that I'll have forever. | |
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| How do you get over someone
Posted: 2/6/2008 8:09:23 PM |
What were somethings that you did in your healing stage that helped you the most.
Burn bridges completely ~ make it final... No communication and look in the mirror every morning and say I don't love/care for so and so ~
Condition yourself... | |
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| How do you get over someone
Posted: 2/6/2008 8:27:38 PM | I echo baldy. I enjoy being single as much as someone special. It's more time to do the things I like to do like meditate, learn to play an instrument, take a class, work on my car, home, etc...work on myself. Let go and Let God, I guess. I don't really pine at this age. I kind of laugh at the times I did.
Try eating some peeled bananas out of the toilet bowl if you think it is so bad. I never found anyone worth doing that level of poor pitiful me for to ESAD. | |
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| How do you get over someone
Posted: 2/6/2008 8:52:10 PM | Well, it hurts like hell, BUT you gotta adjust your attitude. You have just been spared a life of misery, and an expensive divorce. You just lost 180 lbs of ugly fat. You are now free for the one who adores you to find you.
I broke up with whom I thought was "Mr. Right" last June--was wiped out for months--but realized--I couldn't be happy as I am today had I still been with him.
So cry and do whatever you have to do--but get back on the horse before you lose your nerve. In a year or so they will be a mere blip on the radar. You won't remember their name. | |
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| How do you get over someone
Posted: 2/6/2008 8:53:57 PM | | I've recently gone through my first serious breakup. I went through a lot. I cried for the longest time and was depressed. Doesn't help when he's dating someone new mere hours after dumping you. I then became angry with him and told him exactly how I felt about the way things went down. I've now reached a state of acceptance. I have to free him from my life and move on and up. So I just go meet people and have a good time. But everyone has their own timeframe and plan for getting over someone. | |
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| How do you get over someone
Posted: 2/6/2008 9:11:38 PM | You think what ya want.If I should hurt someone: I'd be an accident...a joke...out there.
What ya liked ;same as before,incorporated: say honesty:absolute,compassion,
A fun guy.Fun keeps two a couple.I f ya "settle" you wake-up lookin'at #2 | |
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| How do you get over someone
Posted: 2/7/2008 10:20:13 AM | | I think getting over someone has to be a process. First is the heartbreak, and the pain of losing someone you love. I think the healing process can be a long time, and sadly some people never mend and move on. If the relationship was doomed, time can give the insight as to why it wasnt really meant to be. I think in lasting relationships, people can grow together, instead of growing apart from each other. Im yet to find that person I can grow with myself, but im looking. | |
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