| wtf am i doing wrong?
Posted: 2/22/2008 4:36:15 PM | | I’m getting a lot of views, all my messages read . . .(which suggests my lame soon-to be-changed pic cant be that bad!). . . I’m following the majority of the “rules” . . .and nadda. . . .I would like to think its to intimidating, or they think I’m lying because its to good to be true, lol, but I strongly, strongly doubt that is the case . . .hell I’m having more luck in bars than online . . . Ladies, suggestions? | |
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| wtf am i doing wrong?
Posted: 2/22/2008 5:23:31 PM | well if u were my age and from my country i would be talking to u haha...i really dont see anything wrong with your profile, it seems fine, ur personality really shines through in what you say which is a great thing.
one suggestion i have, and i cant see this making a big difference but u never know...maybe try making ur about me simpler...like make it a couple of paragraphs instead of one big one...use the text features, like bolding a few key words, or underlining...i just found it a little bit crowded, but if thats all i can find wrong then i think ur doing just fine! haha
good luck! | |
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| wtf am i doing wrong?
Posted: 2/23/2008 4:31:40 AM | I think I turn men away with honesty lol a lot look but say nothing. It's not real important to me because a few do, i m hooked pretty much as we speak but just curious.  | |
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| wtf am i doing wrong?
Posted: 2/23/2008 4:35:32 AM | you look pretty good to me but then agin, what do i know lol i get nada too lol. just to young for me. Good luck! | |
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| wtf am i doing wrong?
Posted: 2/23/2008 1:33:37 PM | | I think definitely change the pictures. The whole "thinker" pose is not very appealing. | |
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| wtf am i doing wrong?
Posted: 2/23/2008 3:06:42 PM | | I have photos posted, and a lengthy profile, women chat with me but when I ask them if they would like to meet they accept, then at the last minute they call and say they can't make it, this has happened to me numerous times. Why? | |
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| wtf am i doing wrong?
Posted: 2/23/2008 8:27:26 PM | Just being honest: change those pictures! A woman wants a "normal" guy (whatever that is). But your pictures make you look strange and too off the wall. Get a good straight-forward headshot and then one with a full body shot. You're good looking with those baby blues--show them off in a good way.
Good luck.
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| wtf am i doing wrong?
Posted: 2/24/2008 9:10:39 AM | | I hear you.I'm also going through this learning curve.I'm still learning how to do my profile.Ladies let me know. | |
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| wtf am i doing wrong?
Posted: 2/24/2008 10:10:38 AM | Hey Bro,
I was just curious checking out these threads and ran across yours... I thought i could give a bit of advice to really change your results... This advice may go for women also. I do get several dates, emails, and people saving me as their favorites, so i'm not just talking, i get real results. So here we go: First it is up to you to do these things i suggest but remember you are on here to find a TRUE and compatible mate. So first thing is keep it real. Number one, if you want to attract the opposite sex don't put lame lines or use verbage that is immature, no slang, and make sure you proofread. Ex: Lame soon to be changed. What the hell does that mean!! Change it immediately. You should just describe in eloquent detail what you are looking for, and how you compliment those things in which you are seeking. Number two: Change your title IMMEDIATELY! It should be romantic, manly, and an advertisement that entices the opposite sex to want to view your page.. You are not running in a campaign! You are looking for a beautiful, intelligent woman. Next you need versatile, well dressed, BODY shots and smiling in all of them.. No serious looks. People are more receptive to joy, positiveness, etc.. People are already disappointed and lonely. You gotta show that you are different and fun-loving. Make sure the pics are clear and no beer in your hand. Last, and importantly you have NON-RELIGIOUS!! Long-term women don't want someone without a spiritual respect about them. You can put christian or other. Never atheist or non-religious. And last don't glorify drinking and partying... You can do it when you meet that person and learn their personality, but long term relationships are not built on drinking habits and partying. These are only pastimes.... Change it IMMEDIATELY. Look at my profile or others that have attracted you to them. Look at other men's profiles... There is no harm in that. I hope this helps. I wish everyone all the luck online. I can attest it is truly a great forum to be picky and find you an awesome mate, or at least some great dates................. | |
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fax1
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Joined: 2/4/2008
Msg: 10 | |
| wtf am i doing wrong?
Posted: 2/24/2008 10:53:26 AM | No, just be yourself, hang in there, the best way to look at this site, is to have fun.
I've had a lot of people rate my image, profile etc
End of the day there are no promises.
A lot of the profiles I've read are from people who are unrealistic in what they want and put too much of their own past/ baggage which can be a turn off.
good luck m'dear
fax1 | |
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| wtf am i doing wrong?
Posted: 2/24/2008 11:29:07 AM | Hi OP!!
I read your profile, it talks about you, but it doesn't really say what you're looking for! Would you like women to contact you that are exactly like your personality, or do you do better with a ying to your yang?!
Besides not dating anyone with drama, you don't say what type of women you'd like to meet. Any lady that's a Batman fan gets the title, you're witty but you don't do anything to seal the deal! If you want ladies to contact you, you gotta ask!!!!! | |
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| wtf am i doing wrong?
Posted: 2/24/2008 4:57:17 PM |
Last, and importantly you have NON-RELIGIOUS!! Long-term women don't want someone without a spiritual respect about them. You can put christian or other. Never atheist or non-religious. And last don't glorify drinking and partying... You can do it when you meet that person and learn their personality, but long term relationships are not built on drinking habits and partying. These are only pastimes.... Change it IMMEDIATELY.
I agree with you in general, but I dissent on these two points.
I've had several relationships where the women were non-religious. If he's in fact indifferent to imaginary friends, he should express it as he deems it to be appropriate. It may reduce the clicks, but I know that I'd frustrate a religious person, hence it's better to filter them out right away. In conclusion, if the poster is not a religious person, he should not pretend to be one.
In my personal observations, the more intelligent a person is, the less likely she is to have religious leanings. This particular person is a data analyst. Enough said.
The second point is again debatable.
We all seek people who are compatible with us. I don't drink, but I go to many parties that wind up with the "Who can give me a ride" situation. It's always amusing to observe the behavioral changes that transpire. The point is that if I were to meet someone who would claim she doesn't drink and does turn out to drink often, that would probably interfere with the relationship.
I think this profile is refreshingly honest. It can be expanded. | |
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| wtf am i doing wrong?
Posted: 2/24/2008 5:59:19 PM | It's not my intention to be mean but this is what I got from your profile.
Thinker pose looks like Constipation.
Big Eye= Creepy
Drinking more than 3 times a week = possible alcoholic
All of the parenthesis drive me nuts. Just make a new sentence. | |
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| wtf am i doing wrong?
Posted: 2/25/2008 4:32:04 PM | I respect your opinion and observation on those two points... I concur with what you said.... I definitely would not want/nor expect anyone to say something that you are not. I also agree to say that one should express their pasttime habits so that compatibility will not be compromised. I just urge that how you express your values does have an impact on whether you find a partner or a long term partner. I'm not saying that you have to marry anyone tomorrow. But let me note that you said in your above statement that you had several relationships with non-religious women. This MAY just be a sign that ones that you stick with for LONGEVITY PURPOSES may just have that spiritual respect.... Just an observation. I'm not saying you got to be holy rolly, or go to church all the time, but what long-term woman wants to judge the basis of a possible relationship, if you can't respect or observe VOWS or COMMITTMENT. Again, just a small observation. Women of substance look for these small things... I wish you all the best and again. This is merely my opinion.......   | |
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| wtf am i doing wrong?
Posted: 2/25/2008 9:19:28 PM | | Sorry but it may be your height?? Allot of women prefer someone taller than you....So thats really the shits isnt it?? | |
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| wtf am i doing wrong?
Posted: 2/26/2008 12:47:42 PM | | I think what you wrote in your profile is too wordy....too much info. I actually couldn't read it all. All the things in parenthesis should be taken out. Those are things you can discuss while chatting. Just be direct and to the point. I lost interest after the first two sentences...sorry. I really couldn't even tell you one thing you said in your profile. Like I said, my opinion....few short and simple sentences are more appealing to me. Hope this helps....good luck | |
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| wtf am i doing wrong?
Posted: 2/26/2008 1:05:15 PM | Your third pic is the only decent one. The first nearly made me recoil because of the scowl. The second is just you walking down a sidewalk at night and hard to make out. IOW, put up better pics. One of you smiling head on at the camera maybe? And your full body shot should be closer and easier to make out your face.
"Exciting , successful person with a unique sense of humor . . . (I hang a new Bunny Suicides cartoon by my desk every week. . . ), and a bit of a deviant side (someone complained about a particular one, so a put a more graphic cartoon up and sent it out in an email ). I work hard, play harder and have a blast doing both, but it would be even more fun to have someone along for the ride :)"
First of all, as someone has already said, your profile is WAY too wordy.
And away we go..
OK, the first sentence in your first paragraph is fine. Run it into the very last one. Leave out everything in between.
"A few thing I love: music (I’m an audiophile, heh I always have my iPod on me. Some random favorites: Bowie, The Beatles, Pink Floyd, Cash, Echo & The Bunneyman, The Cure, Fugazi, Ministry, Tenacious D, Aakron Family and there are many, many more), sports (football, hockey, baseball), cooking (love cooking, I make a killer blackend salmon, and sushi, but hate baking, it’s the whole ‘follow instructions thing) , great beer (Rogue and Stone, breweries and beer festivals. I saw Parliament at a festival last fall, great times!), good coffee (I’m a Starbucks junkie, but like the indie coffee shops equally), running (couple miles a day, when its above 40 degrees out anyway), nice restaurants (casual, you can have a conversation without having to scream, and great menus. Some examples: Taverna Cretekou and O'Connels in Old Town, R.F.D.s in Chinatown, Trist in Adams Morgan), meditation (improves focus, concentration and everything else), history (Chinese, Roman, Greek and Japanese in particular), philosophy (mainly Asian), animals (complete dog lover, and cats if they have a great personality), going out with friends (I go out with one of my groups of friends one to three nights a week), films (some random favorites are Clerks, Basketball, Seven Samurai, What The Bleep but there are a ton of others) , select TV shows (The Office, Family Guy, The Simpsons, Rome, The Muppet Show My Name is Earl, Boston Legal) traveling (went to Kiev last year, that was a blast. Planning Dublin this year), hiking (I love the Application Trail/Skyline Drive) and above all creative sarcasm and laughter."
You are being super specific about all of your 'loves' and yes the word 'love' ought to have an 's' on it. ;) You are starting to sound a little too infatuated with yourself here. All that stuff in the parentheses and everything in between needs to be seriously edited and condensed.
"I’m looking for someone who is enjoyable to be around, that I can laugh and have fun with. Dating, and hanging out at first, but I’m open to the possibility of something long term. I love going out and doing things like hiking, sporting events, museums, or just a night on the town. . ."
You mean you're NOT looking for someone you hate to be around? Wow, what a shocker LOL How about,"I love to hit it off with someone so well that we laugh and have a lot of fun together on a date." The last sentence is redundant. You've ALREADY detailed everything you love. Now you're adding hiking and museums to the mix. Either you're a really fun date or you're a whirlwind of energy that will have your date wishing she could find your 'off' switch.
"When I’m with someone I love making her laugh, to listen to what is going on in her life, and help in making her happy, be her escape from the daily stress, and to be something she looks forward to at work on the nights we have plans."
OK, we get it. You like to laugh and have fun. How many more times are you going to point that out? You really need to mention this only so many times. I think, though, that the above paragraph is VERY good, so leave it in and subtract the other "I like to laugh and have fun" references. It's just a case of you have too many words as it is and need to trim it down.
"Regardless of its seriousness, the most important things in a relationship, are communication and chemistry. By communication I’m not talking about frequency, hell, it drives me nuts when someone calls me five times a day, but the quality of communication, like when you like or dislike something you tell each other. There more you communicate, the less you need to, so you can relax and enjoy each others company. I think chemistry speaks for itself. However, chemistry is rarely if ever an exact match initially, it takes time to test and improve to make it work or find out if it wont."
TMI, TMI, TMI!!! Enough already! LOL How many times are you going to use the words 'communication' and 'chemistry' before you allow for the fact that your reader GETS IT? Either you have a low opinon of everyone else's intelligence or you are saying,"I'm going to talk your ear off when you meet me! Just you wait!" It is not necessary in your 'about me' section to blart out your every thought on your every thought. Once again: trim, trim, trim.
One final point: You see how long my reply to your profile is and how long it took to read it? THAT is what reading your profile is like. I hope that helps you understand what myself and others have said about that so far.
I am sure you are a really interesting, intelligent, amusing and considerate person. And I sincerely hope someone else out there comes to discover this as well. Good luck! | |
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