| What is she thinking?
Posted: 2/23/2008 11:52:20 AM | | The other day I was getting coffee in our work breakroom and their was this cute girl getting a redbull out of the vending machine behind me. I over heard her complaining that the machine took her money and that she really wanted the redbull. So being the nice guy that I am I offered to buy her another one and she said she would pay me back the next day so I told her where I worked and said goodbye. So the next day comes around and she never comes by to pay me. :( Today I walk right past her in the hall when she saw me she just put her head down and walked right past me like I killed her cat or something. Did I do something wrong ? Is she just a **** used to getting everything she wants. I'm beginning to lose faith in women kind. :( | |
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| What is she thinking?
Posted: 2/23/2008 12:11:52 PM | | If your interested in getting to know her why not try buying her another Red Bull...present her with it and ask her if she would like to have lunch with you. She just might be shy...or maybe she didn't have the money to pay you back as promised. At any rate...whats a buck these days? | |
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| What is she thinking?
Posted: 2/23/2008 12:20:23 PM | | I guess it could be anything... she could be rude, or really broke, or didn't actually mean she'd get ya back (like "I'll call ya"), or just creeped out by you... she could be a strange faith where the passing of money to the opposite sex means she is yours forever.... who knows. Give her a small smile the next time you make eye contact and other than that.... I'd say move on. If I was into someone, I'd not only get them back their change, but likely some home made cookies to show my appreciation too. | |
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| What is she thinking?
Posted: 2/23/2008 12:20:37 PM | | What if she simply didn't have the money at that time and was to embarrassed to say something? Rarely is anything as it appears. | |
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| What is she thinking?
Posted: 2/23/2008 12:37:51 PM | | Next time you see her, smile and jokingly remind her that she owes you interest on the loan now. It's a nice playful way of getting the message across while diffusing any negative tension about it. | |
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| What is she thinking?
Posted: 2/23/2008 12:58:46 PM | I'm beginning to lose faith in women kind. :(
Forget her. You did a mannerly thing and she's been disrepectful in kind for whatever reason.
However, don't judge all women by one, silly little girl.
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| What is she thinking?
Posted: 2/23/2008 1:01:56 PM | Maybe she just forgot about the $2.00....and you.
Why didn't you say HI when you passed by? | |
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Ecky2
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Joined: 7/31/2007
Msg: 9 | |
| What is she thinking?
Posted: 2/23/2008 1:10:09 PM | | I would put it down to experience, u did a good turn for someone, so feel good about urself for ur kindness. I can't understand why it has upset u so much. Some people are just plain rude, times have changed. There are still a lot of good people out there, dont lose faith. | |
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| What is she thinking?
Posted: 2/23/2008 1:16:05 PM | I expect she forgot the next day.
Did you smile at her when you saw her again? If not and you just looked at her she could have interpreted it as you being annoyed that she forgot..she could have felt really embarrassed if you saw her first..you just looked and she saw it as a grumpy expression on your face.
Plus..realistically..it was only a can of drink..I've done the same for people before and not expected to be paid back even if they offered..it's no big deal to me. | |
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| What is she thinking?
Posted: 2/23/2008 1:19:07 PM | The problem that I see, is that you mentioned it was a 'cute girl'. What if she wasn't cute? Would you still have been a gentleman and helped her? Would you have cared as much if she didn't return the dollar?
Sounds like you may have wanted to get something started, and she was in need of your services, but is not interested. Should have paid you back the money though, that wasn't nice either. Even if she didn't have the money, she coulda said 'WOW' I forgot, or SOMETHING.
Moral is, if you are gonna do something nice for someone, do it with the intention of just being nice. Don't EXPECT any return on your investment. Trouble starts when people 'expect' their acts of kindness to merit a 'reward' of some sort. | |
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| What is she thinking?
Posted: 2/23/2008 1:37:05 PM | Next time you see her, smile and jokingly remind her that she owes you interest on the loan now. It's a nice playful way of getting the message across while diffusing any negative tension about it.
If I was gonna do anything at all (and I probably wouldn't have even thought about it), I would have done this. This is good flirting advice. But now, by ignoring each other in the hallway you've made it a bit of an awkward subject. Well, you have nothing to lose now... :)
Moral is, if you are gonna do something nice for someone, do it with the intention of just being nice. Don't EXPECT any return on your investment. Trouble starts when people 'expect' their acts of kindness to merit a 'reward' of some sort.
I find your advice to accurate in most cases, but it sounds like in his case it was forgone conclusion that he was doing it as a means to get to know her. In which case, I don't think you have uncovered anything earth shattering in regard to the fact that he probably wouldn't have done it, if he wasn't interested in her.
His real mistake was not taking advantage of the opportunity as a chance to talk to her or tease her about not getting your Redbull back. As far as flirting goes OP, buying stuff isn't the preferred method and is definitely not an means to an end-nice gestures are fine, but you have to follow it up with some game. | |
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| What is she thinking?
Posted: 2/23/2008 1:48:34 PM | | Darn......and I thought chivalry WASN'T dead! Guess it is, unless you have 'designs' on the person you are trying to be 'nice' too.......I think people should do nice things 'just because'........I guess I am a dinosaur...... | |
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| What is she thinking?
Posted: 2/23/2008 1:54:18 PM | how much did this redbull cost?
consider you random act of kindness for the day and let it go. One random act of kindness per day is good for you.
is it the money your worried about, her not paying you back, or the girl herself that you would like to get to know better? | |
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| What is she thinking?
Posted: 2/23/2008 2:04:37 PM |
Guess it is, unless you have 'designs' on the person you are trying to be 'nice' too.......I think people should do nice things 'just because'.
LOL. Don't worry, they still do.
I just don't think that's what has happened here.
My personal take on it is that in his limited capacity for flirting, he saw this as an opportunity to talk to her-and figured this was a good way. (No offense intended OP, just not very creative).
The only point of contention is, did he do it
1) just to be nice
2) as a chance to get to know her
IF it's #1, I say good for you. But now were are talking about a couple of bucks here, so get it over.
If it's #2, then just learn from the fact that what you really should have done is tried to take it somewhere, after you had an opening. You didn't. We managed the opening, then thought it was enough- very often it's not. Consider it a cheap education. | |
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| What is she thinking?
Posted: 2/23/2008 3:54:21 PM | There are quite a few cheap people whose word doesn't mean anything and will welch on a $1 bet. Consider it a good investment that you discovered she was trash for just a couple of dollars. Be happy it wasn't me. I'm good for a few dollars; I would, without question, pay back a hundred. If I'm going to get to you without giving you anything in return, it will be for $thousands.
With me, after losing $10 thousand and getting nothing in return you might be justified in complaining. For $2, you should keep your mouth shut. | |
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jdb57
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Joined: 6/20/2007
Msg: 18 | |
| What is she thinking?
Posted: 2/23/2008 7:41:28 PM | It is possible that she forgot the money and felt bad and did not want to have a negative confrontation with you. You can do a couple of things here:
1.) Since you think she is cute you could, as a previous post mentioned, buy her another one and approach her and ask her out to lunch. This would show to her that you are easy going and not hung up on the little injustices in life...oh and that YOU ARE INTERESTED IN HER.
2.) You learned your lesson - move on without causing a fuss.
3.) You can stare her down from across the room with dagger eyes, back her into a corner and then demand your $2 back.
Whichever way you choose, let us know in the forums how it went. | |
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| What is she thinking?
Posted: 2/23/2008 7:50:22 PM | Or maybe she's just like me....forgetful?
Sheesh...
I am seriously speechless...are you serious? THAT is making you lose faith in woman kind?
Okay then...! 
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