| Problems with Trying to get to Know People Online
Posted: 2/24/2008 4:56:02 PM | | I am a bloke who has turned to Online dating. I know I should meet people outside but I'm not into clubbing or pubs. I have had luck chatting to girls off here but some girls are very vague when I try and socialise with them. I only ask the usual get to know you questions but all I get sometimes is Cool or lol or Yeah. The problem is I'm starting to get these answers to all my questions. What am I doing wrong? | |
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| Problems with Trying to get to Know People Online
Posted: 2/24/2008 5:35:55 PM | | Be specific and don't ask the same old questions that every woman gets asked each and every day! Be refreshing - ask something new or ask something related to her profile. BTW actually read the profiles - most men don't!! | |
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| Problems with Trying to get to Know People Online
Posted: 2/24/2008 5:43:31 PM |
What am I doing wrong?
It might not just be the wrong questions but actually the wrong questions to the wrong people? If you arent getting the response you want (but dont tell all the other men here that you are getting responses, they are convinced lady POFers dont reply to any mail) it may be that you have selected women with manners/sense of humour/boredom (*pick*) but not those who are right for you. Maybe you might like to review who you are mailing. | |
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| Problems with Trying to get to Know People Online
Posted: 2/24/2008 6:36:17 PM | It may be the content of your initial e-mail. Perhaps you didn't personalize your message to "her" profile. I know I find it refreshing when someone comments on something from my profile as it shows they took the time to read it. I also like creative questions that make me think (I got an awesome one today).  I know it can be hard as you don't want to go into long paragraphs in the first few e-mails, but there are many things a person can say in a few short sentences that can captivate the other person and catch their attention. Best of luck & happy fishing!!!  | |
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| Problems with Trying to get to Know People Online
Posted: 2/24/2008 11:46:05 PM | | Well if a girl likes metal music I ask them about what bands they like. some will say check my profile for them. some will say I don't have favourites, I ask them where there from, not exactly of course, how old they are because some girls lie about their age on their profiles, I know one did. I don't want to sound nasty but why can't the girls ask me questions. I find I have to make all the effort. | |
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| Problems with Trying to get to Know People Online
Posted: 2/24/2008 11:53:24 PM | that's a good question, but truthfully it means that they're not interested (maybe not attracted...btw, you are a good looking man and I'm straight). the reason why I say this is because women will keep a conversation going if the guy is attractive and will most likely want a date set up quickly. It's worse here in Los Angeles, women don't care about the profiles and what a caring and honest man has to say...sad
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| Problems with Trying to get to Know People Online
Posted: 2/25/2008 8:00:11 AM | The problem is when I do ask girls about things their interested in whilst referring to their profile. They sometimes snap at me and say "just look at my profile" But if I do that all the time what's the point in asking them anything?
I've almost run out of things to say to one girl. Because she's so painfully shy she always clams up after a while. It's a pity because one of her friends told me she likes me. After telling her everything about me and asking everything I could ask I asked to meet up and she just said I'm a stranger and she doesn't know me well enough. I don't know what else to do. She is interested in me but I don't know how to help her out of her shell. | |
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| Problems with Trying to get to Know People Online
Posted: 2/25/2008 2:14:39 PM | I know you are asking for a womans perspective but I can offer some good advice from experience.
Online you don't ask personal questions, you let the woman offer the info or ask if you can ask about a certain subject. I have found it better to never ask any questions for a long time, then some small ones involving previously introduced subjects. Example: She stated her weekend was pretty good, read a good book, went shopping, went out with friends... etc. I might ask what she was reading, but not what she went shopping for or about her friends. Don't get too personal too quick.
In real life that may be ok, but online is totally different. Hope this helps! | |
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