| Anybody just not interested in dating?
Posted: 2/26/2008 8:32:46 PM | I was wondering how many people on here are just not interested in dating. I would love to hear from you all.
And its not because you don't have options and nobody responds or is interested in you, it just doesn't sound appealing. I myself have enough options I could consider and the guys are nice, funny, interesting, etc. I appreciate their attention as life would be more bland without it.
But still, its just not compelling enough to take the time for. My life is pretty full already but I could make time for someone. I just don't take up any of the offers presented to me although I'm sure at least one or two would be compatible.
And do you, like me, feel strange that your not seeking a partner? It seems its the 'thing to do' to be with someone. Have a partner. Not live a single life as alot, I mean alot, of people think there is something wrong with you if you do.
Is this thread redundant? See, that's how uninterested I've become! Argh. | |
|
| Anybody just not interested in dating?
Posted: 2/26/2008 9:47:26 PM | Interesting, so you are on a dating site because you don't want to meet anyone?
I myself, have hidden my profile time and time again, I get options.. but I just don't feel it, I don't feel I have really met anyone that I can give myself to completely. In fact, I have met someone that I thought I could, unfortunately, she's with someone else. Oddly enough, she talks to me about how unappreciated she is, how much she's just not another pretty face, she's not just an object, not a prize, has a heart n soul, and is not just everyone's Fun-Girl. Yet here I sit. So.. are my expectations too high.. or just plain wrong? Why is it I have 5 chasing me, while I chase 1. (Just using 5 as an example) I had a friend tell me a couple of years ago, I should have stuck it out with my son's mother, because she truly loved me... uhuh sure she did, that's why I cooked, cleaned, and paid all the bills. That's why our communication was little to none (and I don't mean just mundane everyday talking, I mean actual intelligent conversations about our future, or child's future for that matter).
Lately I fear that I will die alone. I fear that I will never meet anyone that will love me for me, give me her all, support me and stand by me. Bet you didn't think I was going to say that.
I don't feel strange for not seeking a partner anymore. As much as I would love to live my life with someone I can respect and grow old together with while we share hours and hours of conversations about our kids and grand kids..I simply don't think 'looking' for it will help. All I can do is be me, do what I have to do, and when the right one comes along, jump on it, and run with it.
You see, as much as I would like to believe there is one true love for us all.. I think about all the people back in the day who had arranged marriages. I think society forces us to think we have to conform to a certain way of life. As much as I try to fight that fact. I have come to realize perhaps all that effort might just be better used giving it my all to someone who shows as much interest in me as I can them.
With that said, I await someone who will love me, with all their heart and soul. Until then, I live my life with all my heart and soul.
I have this on my MSN under my name
"True love means nothing, unless you are willing to sacrifice everything."
On that note
Take Care,
God Bless
RuMoR
 | |
|
| Anybody just not interested in dating?
Posted: 2/26/2008 10:35:14 PM | | I have an interest in people who tell me that they will never be romantically interested in me or live very far away. Then I can speak and write without this romance thing mucking up a human conversation. | |
|
| Anybody just not interested in dating?
Posted: 2/27/2008 12:07:56 AM | | It depends how long you're in this phase. A family member of mine says exactly what you say, but she's been single for years and every once in a while lets out that it would be nice to have somebody, then immediately goes on a long speech about how she's so happy and fulfilled blah blah blah "oh I just couldn't be happier". I call BS. An emotionally healthy adult naturally wants sex and intimacy, and is not as happy as they could be if they're going for long periods without it. As a side note, I've also never met someone who was good with the opposite sex who had these long periods without intimacy. | |
|
| Anybody just not interested in dating?
Posted: 2/27/2008 2:48:49 AM | | I feel your pain......In my case, the guys that I am compatible with, I am not attracted to and the guys I am attracted to, I am not compatible with. What is a girl to do? I guess I will try to find a guy to live in my closet who I can bring out on "special" occasions!!!!!!!!!! | |
|
| Anybody just not interested in dating?
Posted: 2/27/2008 6:16:34 AM | Your Q is not as easy as it sounds. Good company is the best thing in the world, but not the easiest to find, and I'm not sure why I'm not eager about dating. For one thing, it's not the same at 40 or 50 as when you were 20. Already been there, and it's not terra incognita anymore. Maybe it's like the Japanese proverb that a wise man will climb Mt Fuji once, and a fool will do it twice. More inconvenience than adventure. Where will you end up if you follow the same path again? Right here.
"And do you, like me, feel strange that your not seeking a partner?"
No. Why "strange?" If you've had to forge your own life, and that's how you get along, then any partner pretty much fits already, or he doesn't. Human beings are not interchangeable parts—yet.
"It seems its the 'thing to do' to be with someone. Have a partner. Not live a single life as alot, I mean alot, of people think there is something wrong with you if you do."
What a lot of people think isn't worth the smoke it floats on. If you get cut, they don't bleed. What most people think, for the past century, is strongly influenced by advertising. You'll probably spend more if you go out on a date than if you stay home. If I'm trying to sell valentines, tickets, dinners, cars, clothes, and you're not buying, then yes, I think you're strange. And subversive. And a terrorist.
If having a partner is "the thing to do," that must mean an ad-hoc serial partner, to dispose of and replace whenever. Most marriages fail. So, I guess a string of exes can be seen as a string of failures or a string of successes. Amy Vanderbilt took the latter view and became a famous advice columnist and authority on marriage. | |
|
| Anybody just not interested in dating?
Posted: 2/27/2008 10:34:26 AM | I'm not interested in Internet dating. I don't feel like going through the whole email, chat, phone call, coffee-meet/chemistry/you're not average you're fat- check.
If I meet someone in real life, or a friend had a friend for a set-up, I'd consider going out.
I don't feel strange for not actively seeking.
At this point in my life, I'm not searching...I'm attracting. | |
|
| Anybody just not interested in dating?
Posted: 2/27/2008 10:48:34 AM | It seems that most of the women here are not, but that may be from their own personal experience. As they share their thoughts on what was an awful date more than what was wonderful....
For me the whole Kit and Kabootle... is about gettin out there and seeing who is who... stretchin your horizons with many people to learn as you go, and grow on the way.
I read many files from many women, who profess that they like to meet new people... but then you hear from some that they are tired of the friggin A holes, who only want to fondle them, and get into their pants after or on the first date... So where does that leave the Good Guys....? (out of business)
They no longer have a chance as women become leary of what is real and what is not.... only to find that he was not what he advertised he was. After awhile that can be disconcerting for anyone.... There is so much fake and fraud going on in this country now, that some are willing to settle for a quick fix of satisfaction what ever form it may come in.
I used to enjoy this site in the first few months, now it is getting harder and more difficult to find anyone who is willing to believe that I am who I advertise to be.
So even if you are charming with the words, wonderful women like Sabinee are discouraged, and who can blame her. I have been on a few sites lookin for a friendship that would develope into a lasting romance... but if you pay for it or it comes along without searching it is nice to meet people who are real in every sense of the word.
If so many are fed up with the way they are treated men or women why is it that these sites are so popular?? Well for many it is easier to be accepted for who they are in cyber then in the real world, which for some is all they have... poor health, phyiscal difficulties, or other issues, it is all they have to connect with others, and then there are those who will purposely try to scamm you for money, or those who only want to come to America.... oh yeah, lets not for get the perverts as well...
So many people with so many choices it is enough to make some gagg, and others drool... but we stick to our values and principals, while we go through our lives as best we can.
| |
|
| Anybody just not interested in dating?
Posted: 2/27/2008 11:11:57 AM |
I feel your pain......In my case, the guys that I am compatible with, I am not attracted to and the guys I am attracted to, I am not compatible with. What is a girl to do?
Isn't that standard for most women....lol | |
|
| Anybody just not interested in dating?
Posted: 2/27/2008 11:27:41 AM | I am not activley dating because I'm not interested in rescueing someone that doesn't have their life together...
I don't want to be used as a bank account for any reason..
Dinner? Drinks? Transportation? A place to live?
The list keeps getting longer and longer..
I want someone that is my equal in every way...
Why should I want anyone that Doesn't make my life better and more complete?
What do most of these women have to offer a man ??? Sex and a bad attitude!!!
I can get sex without having a woman permanently attached to my side..
Clinging, nagging, and complaining about how unhappy she is because she doesn't have a life.
I spent most of my life being married and found out the hard way what most women are like in everyday life..
I tried dating after the second divorce.. It SUCKS!!!
I let her come back to live with my children and I after the first divorce..
She had ran off with another man thinking she was going to take everything I had worked for with her. Including the kids..
I was concerned about bringing up the kids the right way so I remarried her to give the kids a chance to have a complete and healthy lifestyle.. It paid off.! They grew up to be good people.
Most women are out to get anything they can get..
Some need psycological help because without a man to lean on and to support them , they could not exist..
It is very hard for a man to find a woman that has her sh!t together......!!!
 | |
|
| |
| Anybody just not interested in dating?
Posted: 2/27/2008 11:47:34 AM | Well plenty of fish is a lot more then just a dating site.How many people do you see on the forums who are married and in a relationship.Their profiles will say straight out that they are not available and here only for the forums.Personally if plenty of fish had no forums to offer i would of deleted my profile long ago.
I am not looking to date anymore because i have just come to accept that being single is what fate has in store for me.I have seen what type of man is what my choices are and personally i would rather be single then lock myself into a relationship with such men.Being single is not bad or scary and it is not awful as most people believe. | |
|
| Anybody just not interested in dating?
Posted: 2/27/2008 12:21:35 PM | | Rachelle~C: Did you meet your SO here, and just decided to remain for the boards? OR did you exclusively join this site for the forums? | |
|
| Anybody just not interested in dating?
Posted: 2/27/2008 12:55:25 PM | yes, I let myself think that I am actively looking but often it's too comfortable enjoying one's own company  Instead of waiting at home for prince charming to come and find me, I thought I'd give online dating a try. I sometimes wonder 'Why do I need to put myself out to be abused in emails, IMs, and meet strangers?'
I met some handsum guys in real life but they turn out to be spoilt and whiney. I am more of a peaceful pro-active type, if I don't like sumthg, I'll complain a few times then I'll try to change it... and if I can't, I'll accept it! But it seems that this culture is more like 'the greasy wheel gets it all' | |
|
| Anybody just not interested in dating?
Posted: 2/27/2008 1:32:38 PM | | I have no SO and yes i have decided to remain only for the forums.I originally joined this site well over a year ago to try to find someone but only stay for the forums.As i said if there were no forums i would delete my profile. | |
|
hn333
|
Joined: 1/26/2008
Msg: 16 | |
| |
| Anybody just not interested in dating?
Posted: 2/27/2008 2:48:35 PM | Not dating is no big deal. Before I joined I had thrown in the towel several years ago and I don't expect much to come of it this time around. People seem to be so specific about who they want that the odds are not in their favor when each email is opened with a jaundiced eye. This bring to mind a lively thread about dating women from overseas in another forum. Bring your fire-proof suit.
 | |
|
| |
| Anybody just not interested in dating?
Posted: 2/27/2008 4:46:26 PM | I'm only here for the forums..
People are endlessly fascinating. Watching the posts, seeing the responses; gives you a great deal of perspective on humanity.
Clearly there is an ingrained need to be loved.
Watching people pull the blinds over their eyes when everyone else see everything.
Or having the answers right in front of them, but not accepting them.
Besides, I doubt I’d ever find anyone here that would hold my attention long enough. | |
|
| Anybody just not interested in dating?
Posted: 2/27/2008 4:52:23 PM | | I'm here for meeting new people. Yes, it's a dating site, but hey, it gives you other options in the seekign list. Just wish you can search interests and narrow it to local areas rather than every user on the site. | |
|
| Anybody just not interested in dating?
Posted: 2/27/2008 5:16:22 PM |
What do most of these women have to offer a man ??? Sex and a bad attitude!!!
I can get sex without having a woman permanently attached to my side..
And you already have your very own bad attitude.
Nebula,
I'm sure you went through an emotional wringer,and I'm sorry for that. But I have to tell you that now your anger, bitterness and low expectations are leading you to encounter the same crappy kind of woman. It's called a self fulfilling prophesy and it can be a tough rut to get out of but I hope you can.
Take it from a woman with her shit together.
Cindy O | |
|
| Anybody just not interested in dating?
Posted: 2/27/2008 5:19:33 PM | | I am not interested in the whole process of emailing, talking, meeting someone, then doing it again and again with another person and so on. It gets redundant and time consuming. I am not cynical by no means, just living in reality for now. If a guy happens to fall and land in front of me, I am not going to step over and pass him up either. | |
|
| Anybody just not interested in dating?
Posted: 2/27/2008 5:29:28 PM | | For me, internet dating happens in spurts. I am gung ho for awhile, and then I get busy with life and back off. Dating IRL is fairly consistant. Those people are my specific interest friends, and the activities we do together are on going. | |
|
| Anybody just not interested in dating?
Posted: 2/27/2008 6:05:33 PM | OP, you are like quite a few women I've met in real life and online -- you're just too busy. Some of these "too busy" women will make time for a guy -- grudgingly, on a trial basis, but quickly abandon ship when they discover that the man actually wants more than the sliver of time that they've bestowed upon him. At the root of this situation is a desire for total control of one's life, mingled with the usual set of fears.
Guys don't give attention just to make your life interesting. They give you attention because they are interested in you. They'll soon learn their lesson, I'm sure, and give their attention to someone who reciprocates.
If I had a dime for every time a woman posts saying, "It's just so darling when men jump through a thousand hoops just to entertain me, don't you think?" I'd be more than rich. | |
|
| Anybody just not interested in dating?
Posted: 2/27/2008 6:30:20 PM | hey i read your articale about not dateing?? so i thoiught id give you a reply.
i am 46years old and maried . i have 2 girls . 18 and 15 .im afull time carer for my wife whom has huntingtons decease.i we have been maried for some years now . and i have
been on here for at;east 4 years . i have met alot of females . face to face and they know im maried .because it is sdded on my profile.i have even had a few offers . but i turnd them down . because i believe in whom i maried and 1 is enought.i always stress
out to peoplr i talk to that i am maried .and do you know you will be suprised how manny peoplestill talk to you .when you say im maried.butb i must admite it does get me thinking . when the same people keep asking me out but i am happy with wot i have got.i love my wife with all my heart and she is tha only one for me . i dont keep nothing back from her . i even get her to sit next to me when im talking to people on here. eventhought its mostly female .i talk about alot off peoples problems on here which i cant repeat wot is said . they just ask my advice and i tell them wot i can .but to end this page . no i havent dated any one on here and never will . one woman is enought for me .i dont see the piont .as i am happy for wot i have ok .is this the answer you are looking for ??.well bye bye take care xxx | |
|
Home
login 
