| 1st date at someones house!
Posted: 3/7/2008 4:51:50 PM | Guys! If you were to meet a girl for the first time and you both agree that its a good idea to hang out at your house, Would you expect sex? I know it all depends on the situation, but would you feel like she is sending a mixed message that she wants to be intimate with you because she is at your house? Would you think that, if she didnt want to have sex then she would have suggested going to a public place ?
Women who have met a guy at this place for the first time!
Did you have give a disclamier before hand and let the guy know that you were coming over only to hang out and be platonic?
Did you feel like you were putting yourself in danger by going to a strangers house, or you felt like you pretty much knew him enough , that he wouldnt do anything? | |
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| 1st date at someones house!
Posted: 3/7/2008 4:59:26 PM | OMG! If a girl and I combined our infinite powers and the only date we could come up with was at one of our homes it would be a waste of awesomeness.
First time meeting for sex?! OMGZZZZZZ.
But then again... Women think with their emotions omgggg. I would think it was creepy if a girl said "Lets go on a first date at your house". Creepy creepy creepy. Maybe she works for the CIA.
Ahh danger. Danger is what makes sex good. Danger is what makes sex amazing. I mean lets face it... Sex would be 50x better if it was in the bathroom of a plane that was about to crash compared to sex in the comfort of someone s home where you feel safe.
Perhaps?
NO ID!
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| 1st date at someones house!
Posted: 3/7/2008 5:07:22 PM | | You never meet anyone other than a public place the first time. While you have no greater chance of meeting a nut or psycho on the Internet than in real life, men or women need to be smart and try to figure out if someone is normal before they know where you live. Should this guy get the wrong idea and you are alone in his house, you could easily wind up with an experience you will have to live with the rest of your life. | |
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| 1st date at someones house!
Posted: 3/7/2008 5:10:26 PM | I can't imagine meeting a man for the first time in any setting that wasn't public. Not only is it less than safe to do so but it's overall a really stupid idea. You don't even know this individual. You've implied in your OP that the man is a stranger. Just the fact that you're asking shows that you're in doubt of the wisdom of the action. And you wonder if he's going to think you're asking for it?
Well, I don't know what he's going to think but if he's someone who is inclined to take advantage of you, rape you, or bring you physical harm, you're certainly making it easy for him.
No. You never meet strangers alone. And you don't go off with them anywhere or be alone with them until you've checked them out somewhat. That means you've looked at their drivers license, you've got their home number and address and you've checked this information out to make sure it's on the level. And when you actually do go out with them for the first time and are alone with them there is someone you trust who has knowledge of and access to the information of who this person is in the event you wind up not coming home one night and no one can find you. Be smart and don't be naive. | |
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| 1st date at someones house!
Posted: 3/7/2008 5:16:24 PM | The closest I came to that scenario ended badly. We met for drinks, talked for hours. Things were great. Went to his house to play pool
Long story short, I had to kick him in the knee and go home. As I say in my profile......no still means no and a kick to the knee is a much bigger deal at 50 than it was at 15. | |
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| 1st date at someones house!
Posted: 3/7/2008 5:17:43 PM | If the guys wants the first date at his house, it's for one thing only........and any girl who believes otherwise it totally walking into a seriously dangerous situation. If the girl wants the first date at her house.....must not be thinking with her head then! First and best rule of thumb for dating - meet in a public atmosphere. Not only can you get to know someone in a casual setting, you can also see how they interact with other to help gage how they will interact with you. | |
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| 1st date at someones house!
Posted: 3/7/2008 5:28:19 PM | Anyone who is too cheap to take me out for at least coffee not only doesn't get a first date, they don't get a second date, and as for the sex question, why in the world would you want to even think about having sex with someone like that? He probably re uses comdoms to save money..if he isn't too cheap to buy one in the first place.
Can we say booty call here? Puhleeeeze girl. You are worth more than that. Popcorn with the worst possible tv program in the world is better than that. | |
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| 1st date at someones house!
Posted: 3/7/2008 5:50:31 PM | He probably re uses comdoms to save money..if he isn't too cheap to buy one in the first place.
ewwwwl thats gross!!!!!!!!! | |
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| 1st date at someones house!
Posted: 3/7/2008 6:18:36 PM | This is how I would personally approach the situation.
1.) I wouldn't invite someone I don't know to my house right off the bat if you paid me. You don't know how they are, who they are, or what their motives are.
2.) Even on a second or third date, I would tell them flat out if they can be expecting something intimate from me, should the situation turn to intimacy.
3.) I don't go to anyone's house for above mentioned reasons on the first/second date. I like to get a feel for the guy and make sure I'm not gonna get whacked / stalked / beat up. :) lol | |
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| 1st date at someones house!
Posted: 3/7/2008 7:12:29 PM | "While you have no greater chance of meeting a nut or psycho on the Internet than in real life, men or women need to be smart and try to figure out if someone is normal before they know where you live. "
Now here is an answer that makes sense without being filled with sexophobia. Makes perfectly good sense to me. | |
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| 1st date at someones house!
Posted: 3/7/2008 7:43:33 PM | | WOW! All I can say is WOW! You wish. I'm far more opinionated than that. hahaha But honestly, in today's age I can't believe you would even consider it! For one, you only know him through the Internet, which is by definition...YOU DON"T KNOW HIM" Have you not heard any of the stories of people getting killed by someone they met on the Net? And that's just the extreme end of it. Far too many dumb asses have been beat up, raped and so forth in this same situation. First dates, either for men or women should ALWAYS be in a public place!!!!!!! Heck, I won't even give a gal my home phone, cell numbers only! Far too many whack jobs in our world today, gender makes no difference, but for women it is especially so. If you really feel comfortable enough with a person on a first date to bump pee pee's (I love that term) hahaha, then it MIGHT change the situation, and I must emphasize might, but it must be mutual. Just the fact that you had to ask makes me wonder of your level of intelligence. Safe now means not being sorry later. Brain up girl! | |
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| 1st date at someones house!
Posted: 3/7/2008 7:45:39 PM | | "Open spaces, public places". That's my rule, not just for the first date, but for subsequent dates until I feel really, really comfortable with a man. If he doesn't want to wait, then he's not for me. | |
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| 1st date at someones house!
Posted: 3/7/2008 7:55:46 PM | Thanx everyone for your reply, but this message is for GORK....
I was only speaking in GENERAL terms. If you notice I asked the question in general not specifically referring to me. Just like you read other post on here they are not always referred to that person, but just asking.
I am very intelligent which I dont have to prove on here. But I appreciate you pointing it out and making a sensless comment.
NEXT! | |
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| 1st date at someones house!
Posted: 3/7/2008 8:02:41 PM | | Your having to ask the question makes me wonder. If you are as intelligent as you say, you would know the answer. That is unless you just like to light the fires hon. Brain up was not intended to be derogatory, more like sarcastic, which I know does not translate well in print. No offence was intended, but you really shouldn't pose questions that make you look stupid. | |
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| 1st date at someones house!
Posted: 3/7/2008 8:21:56 PM | in answer to the initial question. no! my gf and i met and went back to her house on the first date. although, we first met and ate a meal and talked a while first and had conversed many times both on im and telephone. we met on a "not a date" basis and after going to her house, we talked until the wee hours before i went home alone without anything more than a little hug and a nice feeling about her. we are both older than you and knew quite a bit about each other before we actually met face to face but as a general rule ... going to anothers home would be a no-no for all the above mentioned reasons. though there are exceptions to every rule and certain circumstances that might prevent going anywhere else after dinner, (ours was at a rather late hour due to work schedules), niether of us would normally even consider such a thing although we've been together now for over 2 years partly because of our initial and continued comfort around each other. again though, as a general rule... never be alone with a stranger in his house until he's known.
"former" frog kisser that found his princess | |
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| 1st date at someones house!
Posted: 3/7/2008 8:24:29 PM | To Gork
So did they crown you the king of screening? Do you decide on which question on this site is dumb and which is appropriate to ask. This is a discussion forum. Everyone is here to discuss different situtations and give opinions. By you saying this is a very dumb question, how do you know that there isnt some girl who is interested in hanging out with someone as a first date and took all the opinions given into consideration. Im sure she is a smart cookie and know the risk of being in a very private place with a stranger is a risk, but maybe she felt a connection and though nothing would happen to her. Open your eyes and realize things like this happen every day. Thats why we read incidents in the news! Because people arent taking more precaution. | |
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| 1st date at someones house!
Posted: 3/7/2008 8:57:40 PM | "Peanut" ...
The first rule in dating ... internet or otherwise ... is keep it public!!
Don't spend your trust on anyone who has not earned it!!
You will be safer in a public place ...and he will respect you for watching out for yourself. If he insists on a private place ... just say NO!!! You're smarter than that!!
Good luck.  | |
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| 1st date at someones house!
Posted: 3/7/2008 9:26:41 PM | thank you auntie, I am smarter than that which is why this thread isn't put into 'i and me terms! it was just a question that's all. Im not planning on going to someones home within the first minute I meet them.
I guess all post should start off 'hypothetically speaking'
your reply was much appreciated | |
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| 1st date at someones house!
Posted: 3/7/2008 9:32:03 PM | | I do believe what they classify questions such as this is being a troll (poses topics to illicit an emotional/argumentative response). As you say in your post, people are allowed to give their opinions. Guess what........that's exactly what I have done! I'm not a King, just a Prince hon, but a gal like you would never make it to my courtyard, so you'll never know! hahaha | |
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| 1st date at someones house!
Posted: 3/7/2008 9:40:07 PM | Gary,
you went back to your now current g/f's home, weren't you taking a risk and she as well. Yes you are a little more older than me, but that doesn't mean a lot. Although its not as big as a deal with men, your g/f could have done anything to you as well. you stated that you guys went to a restaurant first, but does that at all make it ok because you got to converse further. Point being you still went back to her house on the first date and whether you are older or not it doesn't condone it. You both may have agreed that sex wasn't an option but how does that make it at all better. Are you saying its ok to go to a stangers house as long as its agreed that there will be no sex and you have dinner first? | |
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| 1st date at someones house!
Posted: 3/7/2008 9:40:52 PM | I would think by now, everyone knows better than to go to some strangers house, and unless you've met them and know them, they are strangers. If it's just a question, that you already know the answer to, what was the purpose? A little attention. | |
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| 1st date at someones house!
Posted: 3/7/2008 10:03:18 PM | | Hey gorko64. First you want to go to the girl's house on the first date (stupid party foul); then you have the audacity to tell her she is asking stupid questions on forum. You are a loser and she is better off without you. Her intuition was right on target. She researched the matter and found her answer. I too have someone I just met who wants to come to my apartment to "snuggle". He doesn't have a home phone. Says he washed his cell phone and still doesn't have one after 3 weeks even tho his profile says he is self-employed. Has weekdays M-F free. I say he's married, works nights and his wife works days. Anyway I am not going to let him in my home. This is my safe, personal sanctuary. You would have to be a pretty special person to get in my door. | |
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| 1st date at someones house!
Posted: 3/7/2008 10:05:29 PM | | No, attention is not the case, it was a general question much like 90% of all other post. Just asking what guys expect on first dates. I didn't realize when a person post a thread you have to be speaking about yourself. I guess ill go back and re- read posting instructions from the moderators. Im sure im bound to find something in there about not posting hypothetical questions and getting view from them. Especially with out having names thrown at me. any other responses are welcomed and back to our scheduled program! | |
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| 1st date at someones house!
Posted: 3/7/2008 10:05:43 PM | No, no, no. Never, never, never.
You don't meet at someone's house the first time you meet them.
Never. Never, ever.
You don't know if you're going to be safe-- even if it is your house. | |
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| 1st date at someones house!
Posted: 3/8/2008 5:00:30 AM | | Hypothetically speaking I think many men, after knowing how women on this board are cautious about first dates would assume that the girl was dumb enough/horney enough to allow them to crawl all over her. In other words someone you do not plan on having a real relationship with or introduce to your friends. | |
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