| He's 10 years younger, could it work?
Posted: 3/7/2008 5:28:53 PM | A guy 10 years younger than me appears to be showing interest. I just dismissed it at first as my imagination, but I'm getting consistent signs. He asks me about myself, suggested meeting up and he lingers to talk to me and so on when others have drifted off. Can a guy really be interested in a relationship with a woman 10 years older than him? If he is, would he only be looking for a quick fling and nothing long term? He seems a genuine person. I'm not used to this!
I'm wondering what to do. I do like him, but don't want a brief fling. I'm looking for something more meaningful than that. | |
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| He's 10 years younger, could it work?
Posted: 3/7/2008 5:36:19 PM | | At your ages I don't see why not. It would be different if he were 20 years old but you're both old enough to have shared enough life experiences to overcome what is a minor age difference for adults. | |
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| He's 10 years younger, could it work?
Posted: 3/7/2008 5:40:04 PM | Well, you're 50... so this guy is 40, right?
I wouldn't interpret the situation as being different than if it was coming from a guy closer to your age. If he likes you, the feelings he's having are the same that a 50yr old would experience. It can work if you're both on the same page about things... just like any relationship.
Go for it!! I'd date a 50yr old if I was attracted to her, no problem. =) | |
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| He's 10 years younger, could it work?
Posted: 3/7/2008 5:50:55 PM | check out the recent thread of
do men in their 20's and 30's prefer 17 year old girls better than older women?
In the ask a guy and I think you see some very opinionated people remarking the whole age issue OMG I'm so tired of all these same old threads of should I date someone younger or older.
In your personal situation your both 50 so that makes him 40 I really think your both mature adults and not looking for a fling. But I can be wrong. Age is just a number its how you feel and act. | |
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| He's 10 years younger, could it work?
Posted: 3/7/2008 6:02:06 PM | OP - rather than focus on the destination, enjoy the journey with eyes wide open.
Feel free to email me off the forums - concerned about an element of vulnerability in your initial post. Ok? Best off stage.
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| He's 10 years younger, could it work?
Posted: 3/7/2008 6:31:46 PM | | Sure. I dated a lady 11 years older than me for a few years. We got along just fine and parted ways for reasons unrelated to the age difference. Go for it, find out if he's serious or just looking for a good time. | |
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| He's 10 years younger, could it work?
Posted: 3/7/2008 6:44:06 PM | | Thanks for your comments angelheart3. I can't email you as your settings will not accept messages from someone in my country. | |
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| He's 10 years younger, could it work?
Posted: 3/7/2008 6:54:30 PM | re the Opost
In between a "brief fling" and "growing old together" there are lots of "meaningful" rels, so why not? Carpe Diem! | |
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| He's 10 years younger, could it work?
Posted: 3/8/2008 5:41:44 AM | I once dated a lady 10 years older than myself, we lasted 3 and half hears and parted for reasons non age related. I still talk to a few older women older than myself and the one thing I notice is the same old question, "what do you want with an older woman?" There is no real answer to that question in my eyes, to some its personal preference that they prefer to date older ladies, and sometimes it simply happens that regardless of the age you both just get along!
If you look at your situation from different angles you may find a little more faith in the younger guy! Firstly if the guy in question was 51 would he become less likley to just want a fling than a guy who is 40? (chances are NO)
Secondly is there really any point in you worrying about things you have no controll over? If this chap is planning a brief fling then it would be fairly obvious after a few meetings as friends, and you know its not what you want. If he is genuine and likes you there are still no promises that it will last forever! People seem to spend to long worrying about what could be as appose to what is..
My overall advice, If you like him and he likes you.. Enjoy each others company and let good old mother nature take its course! Just remember to keep your mind AND YOUR EYES WIDE OPEN!
Hope this helps x | |
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| Younger men/ Older women
Posted: 3/8/2008 2:04:48 PM | Last year I dated a guy I just tried to shake off because he was 16 years younger than me. I was 47 and he was 31. But I ended up relenting because I was so fond of him; he's really an attractive and interesting person. But it turns out, he simply misjudged my age and thought I was 10 years younger than I am. When I found out he was so wrong, I told him my age, and after that, he couldn't spare one ounce of respect for me.
Dating younger men is a real hazard for older women. No doubt. Once you get older and less pretty, they will want to wander. And then it will be even harder for you to find a good guy, because the last of your looks will have left you. | |
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| Younger men/ Older women
Posted: 3/8/2008 2:28:53 PM | | Well I have dated a woman who was 15 years older then me at the time. I really had a wonderful time being with her, but her job transferred her to another state and at the time I was not able to go with her and unfortunately the distance caused us issues, but personally I would say if you like the guy give it a shot. I would never turn down dating a woman because she was older, matter of fact I prefer an older woman. | |
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| He's 10 years younger, could it work?
Posted: 3/8/2008 2:30:24 PM | | i once dates a girl that was 8 years older than me, i was attracted but we just didnt really click. and that feeling of the age difference never went away...i miss her tho lol | |
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| Younger men/ Older women
Posted: 3/8/2008 2:39:33 PM |
Dating younger men is a real hazard for older women. No doubt. Once you get older and less pretty, they will want to wander. And then it will be even harder for you to find a good guy, because the last of your looks will have left you.
Were all going to get older and loose looks! and we are all growing old at the same rate? I still think all these excuses are silly? The lady (original poster)said she wants more than a short term fling? and based on human nature dating a guy her own age can last longer or shorter than dating a younger or older guy??
It seems to me that there is a false sense of security dating people your own age? Maybe if we all stepped back and just was happy with what and who we had the pleasure of growing to like instead of making excuses not to date we would all get on a little better?
As for the 16 year younger guy, seems like he wasnt overly interested in you as a whole person? Before I get to a state where I am "dating" someone there are a few things I have to know and age is usually a top priority? | |
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| He's 10 years younger, could it work?
Posted: 3/8/2008 5:55:16 PM | | Thanks for all replies. What I was wondering was am I mad to think that a man of 40 would be attracted to a woman of 50? It seems not, judging by responses, but honestly have you ever made advances to a woman 10 years older than you for anything other than a fling? | |
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| He's 10 years younger, could it work?
Posted: 3/8/2008 6:19:47 PM | Hey witching_weather....there are plenty of beautiful women in their fifties.
When I was 36 yrs old....i had a 4 month relationship with a 53 yr old woman.....she was very attractive and one of the sexiest women I ever met and had a good heart.
The only deal breaker for us....was that she became to possessive and controlling over me .....and I didn't want that, so i broke it off..
I made the best of it and it was a wonderful 4 months.
OP...give your 40 yr old admirer a chance.....if he is genuine, it may turn out to be a wonderful relationship....but you have to feel comfortable with it first.
I got the feeling you really like him.....go for it....JMO. | |
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| He's 10 years younger, could it work?
Posted: 3/8/2008 6:23:41 PM | have you ever made advances to a woman 10 years older than you for anything other than a fling
In my case the women I have dated 10 or more years older I have had long term intensions with. Some have turned out to be no more than a fling but that had nothing to do with age and I would honestly say in the case of some of them it was more a case of an older woman wanting a fling with a younger guy!
Only you both know how you feel about each other! Like I said before why worry? You obviously find him attractive and him you, and you obviously get along to think like you do?! So don't worry about what could or couldn't be just grab the oppertunity while its there! On the other hand relax about it if he is genuinly interested it will all fall in to place (aslong as you dont blow hot and cold, IE 1 min your going to go for it then let doubts kick in)
I wouldnt even give the fling or the worries another thought! the more you worry the more insecurities you will build and the more chance you have of it possibly turning from a genuine oppertunity into nothing but a fling?
I once heard an old saying which I still believe is true!
Also a quick change of subject.. I added some color to this post to see if it worked.. Is this allowed? (im new to forums so Im not sure...) If this is not allowed could a moderator politley inform me reguarding text formatting? | |
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| He's 10 years younger, could it work?
Posted: 3/8/2008 9:23:33 PM | | You are 50. He is 40. Not a big deal. IMO a 10 yr age difference could cause problem if one person is really young. For example if you were 30 and he was 20. A 20 yr old is often still maturing and doesn't have much life experience. | |
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| He's 10 years younger, could it work?
Posted: 3/8/2008 10:29:38 PM |
but honestly have you ever made advances to a woman 10 years older than you for anything other than a fling? .
I would have married her if given the opertunity. But Like I said her job transfered her and I was unable to move at the time. | |
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| He's 10 years younger, could it work?
Posted: 3/8/2008 10:46:58 PM | | I don't think your age has anything to do with this. What does have to do with this is your current maturity level. If you are both in a similar maturity range, age shouldn't matter. I'm 26 going on 27 and I'm with a girl 9 years my senior and we get along famously because we are both in similar places in terms of maturity. | |
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