| | DNA test before MarriagePage 1 of 2 (1, 2) | Ok, so my family (not mom, dad or siblings) have out of wedlock children not claimed and or not known about. So that means I could have cousins (1st, 2nd, 3rd etc.) aunts, and uncles that I don't know about my age, would it be weird if I ask for a DNA before we get married if we are related? or should I just hope and pray that we are not?? I know this is an question, but I wonder if anyone else has dealt with this... | |
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| DNA test before Marriage
Posted: 3/9/2008 6:34:22 PM | I read that such a thing will become a problem in the future, with so many children from sperm donors. There is already one case of half-siblings who got married and then found out they shared the same father.
If you're in doubt ask for it. | |
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| DNA test before Marriage
Posted: 3/9/2008 6:37:33 PM | | Thanks, I keep hearing stories from my family and I don't want to ask for DNA, but I also don't want to marry someone I am related too. | |
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| DNA test before Marriage
Posted: 3/9/2008 6:39:31 PM | | would be before you sleep together or just before you get married. If you have already done the deed then the point is mute. | |
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| DNA test before Marriage
Posted: 3/9/2008 6:43:17 PM | Ok, so my family (not mom, dad or siblings) have out of wedlock children not claimed and or not known about.
If they're not known about, how do you know about them? | |
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| DNA test before Marriage
Posted: 3/9/2008 6:54:52 PM | would it be weird if I ask for a DNA before we get married
How about before you sleep together?
It appears that first cousin marriages are banned in your state so that means you need to really get to know the person's history before you get too intimate.
Do you live in such a close-knit community that it really could be a problem? If so, maybe you oughta consider moving. | |
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| A Complicated Song
Posted: 3/9/2008 7:01:17 PM | I was
Feelin' pretty down,
'Till my
Girlfriend came around,
We're just -- so alike, in every way-
I gotta say!
In fact,
I just thought I might,
Pop the -
Question there that night,
I was -
Kissing her, so tenderly, but woe is me:
Who would have guessed,
Her family crest,
I'd suddenly spy,
Tattooed on her thigh,
And son-of-a-gun,
It's just like the one on ME!
Tell me:
How was I supposed to know we were both related?
Believe me, if I knew she was my cousin we never would have mated
What to do now?
Should I go ahead and propose, and get hitched, and have kids with eleven toes?
And move to Alabama where that kind of thing is tolerated?
No no no
~~Weird Al Yankovic | |
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| DNA test before Marriage
Posted: 3/9/2008 9:35:54 PM | Inbreeding takes generations to cause problems. Unless you have a genetic disorder in the family to start with that will be reinforced by the pairing I wouldn’t worry to much about it, cousins or even half siblings should still be ok. Now if your kids have kids and then there kids have kids down the line there will be problems.
This really isn’t something you need to worry to much about from a medical point of view, now the social stigma if people find out your married to your cousin or half sibling well… that will be a problem, not the kind of thing you want to go telling people. | |
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| DNA test before Marriage
Posted: 3/9/2008 10:09:22 PM | | If you're really worried about this then ask. It's not a big deal, just explain to the person why you want to and they should understand. If sonmeone told me that I'd understand and not be offended or anything. Maybe do it before things go too far though because if you're already talkinga bout marriage then find out you're related that'd probably take the piss out of your toilet. | |
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| DNA test before Marriage
Posted: 3/10/2008 2:59:45 AM | | Ya know, it's such an odd thing to ask and it has good reasoning behind it, I would not be offended. I would be impressed that you considered it and would really hope we weren't related so I could marry a smart person. However if we were related, I'd be glad there were smart people in my family. Of course then we'd be single again, but hey...better to know. | |
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| DNA test before Marriage
Posted: 3/10/2008 3:09:54 AM | I would say if it is that troublesome to you and a DNA test would put your mind at ease I would say go for it. I couldn't think of any reason anyone would object to it aside from the cost. I know a few years ago they were quite expensive but who knows, costs could have gone down or may be covered by insurance.
It sounds like you won't be satisfied without the proof so I would say go for it. Not a big deal really other than a little hair, blood or other DNA material for the test. | |
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| DNA test before Marriage
Posted: 3/14/2008 10:07:27 PM | | Personally I think paternity tests should only be used to try and resolve serious family financial disputes, such as knowing who the father of a child is to assess child support, to avoid nasty and messy litigation through the Family Court. Ethically speaking, children born out of wedlock or as a result of cheating in a relationship need to be respected and treasured as human beings, even if they are the fruit of parental irresponsibility and stupidity. It is wrong to punish an innocent child for the faults of its parents. | |
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| DNA test before Marriage
Posted: 3/14/2008 11:58:44 PM |
I read that such a thing will become a problem in the future, with so many children from sperm donors. There is already one case of half-siblings who got married and then found out they shared the same father.
While I'll admit to some ignorance as to how sperm banks operate, it is in part for this reason why I find the whole idea of them of significant ethical concern. | |
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| DNA test before Marriage
Posted: 3/15/2008 12:07:48 AM | If the local gene pool is full of relatives... time to hop to a new pond.
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| DNA test before Marriage
Posted: 3/15/2008 2:21:58 PM | Well I'm also scared to date anyone from my county not so much for out of wed lock children because I live in a small population and I cannot keep up with my entire family. For instance my mom is the baby of 12. My family pretty much built the small town I live in.
This is actually funny I was talking to a girl at work about the same thing yesterday. Like I told her I was at a family reunion and I've got a cousin that is the brains of out family tree and we went to a graveyard where a lot of my family was buried in from like the 1800"s really neat for history buffs like myself. But anyways he was saying that we were related to this family with this name and that name. I'm like Damn cuz you just named the last names of 5 girls I like forget about those crushes.
Thanks a lot. So sometimes I know how you feel about wanting a DNA test sometimes.  | |
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| DNA test before Marriage
Posted: 3/15/2008 2:50:42 PM | Just avoid cruising for dates at family reunions.
You should be fine. | |
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| DNA test before Marriage
Posted: 3/15/2008 3:14:11 PM | Prevent inbreeding. Ban country music. The best bumper sticker i have ever seen. Next to Don't make me violate my probation.  | |
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| DNA test before Marriage
Posted: 3/15/2008 5:23:41 PM | I grew up in an area where I was nearly related to everyone. I have a copy of my family tree around here someplace. It's a book about 2-3 inches thick, and that's just one county. Anyway, I left; problem solved.
I thought the state wouldn't issue a marriage license if the people were closely related. DNA tests can be expensive. I think as long as whomever you are with can name their biological family line back a couple of generations you're good to go (parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles great grandparents). | |
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| DNA test before Marriage
Posted: 3/15/2008 5:33:21 PM | The test will at least set your mind at ease, Or having a better run down of his/her family history/geneology would be good, but to just be safe DNA will tell you if they are related.
I saw the title and thought, test to see if date is human or from outer space, new tests sold at local drug store prove you are human 90% of time.....
Charles. | |
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| DNA test before Marriage
Posted: 3/16/2008 2:09:36 AM | | If I loved someone, I really wouldn't bother to find out if we're related. Why wreck a good thing? Love is hard enough to find. | |
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| DNA test before Marriage
Posted: 3/16/2008 5:27:15 AM | Yes I would recommend it if you think the possibility is rather high.
I have friends who come from places where alot of the people are related so they tend to get blood tests done to see if they are related | |
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