| Do women ever play mind games , lie and waste mens time ?
Posted: 3/30/2008 1:58:43 AM | | I've noticed that about 7 or 8 out of 10 women will always have something like this in their profiles — Game players need not apply , not into mind games , time wasters move on , liars beware etc . Apparently full grown blokes the world over are collectively still 12 yrs old . WOW!! . But I mean does this work the other way around too ? How many blokes have had to babysit women who are into mind games , lie , waste time ... ? I wonder ? You know the song . | |
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| Do women ever play mind games , lie and waste mens time ?
Posted: 3/30/2008 2:29:57 AM | Im so glad im not a boy.. i agree
alot alot alot of silly lonely litle girls swim here and like the feelign of their bait being nibbled .
( Yes before i get hammered obviously goes for the boys too!)
xmmm
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| Do women ever play mind games , lie and waste mens time ?
Posted: 3/30/2008 2:38:45 AM | Without going into too many details, yes.
I had one person in particular. She thought she was playing me for a fool, trying to keep me on the backburner while she tested the waters with other people. I played along, she took it further than I expected. Disappointing, a little bit of my faith in women died with that episode.
I have had another person that was either a) mentally unstable or b) trying to play hard to get and just not doing a good job. All in all, I can comfortably say I have already seen worse from women than I would ever do. I have picked up a few lessons on the way though. | |
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| Do women ever play mind games , lie and waste mens time ?
Posted: 3/30/2008 2:48:48 AM | Ah yeah we do and the problem is ??????????????
Nah seriously Muzzajg....Im sorry but I dont think its gender specific...it does work both ways....everyone of us has been kicked to the kerb one way or another and we are all nursing our brokens hearts....yet we are on these types of sites in the HOPE of maybe connecting with another....for true love, friendship, hanging out, dating , sex...who knows what, but we are...and for whatever reason we are on here I guess we shouldnt judge - to each their own ...however I do agree with the post above that you shouldnt really put yourself out there until you believe you are fully ready/healed to be fair to your next companion.
Yeah we all do have baggage, how could we have not ?..we just went on a journey with our previous partner...and its ended...I guess the trick is before you start another adventure, check your old knapsack at check in ....dont declare it as carry on luggage | |
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| Do women ever play mind games , lie and waste mens time ?
Posted: 3/30/2008 2:50:54 AM |
no game players E.T.C is kind of retarded. retarded? im not heavily into politically correctness but i dont think thats a really cool thing to say rooo, i guess some of the guys here really are 12 lol but i just knew this one was gonna be a doozy ;)
as much as i hate to admit it, i think just the fact that we are all spending our time and energy in a singles site, especially those of us who are no longer teenagers, is testament to the fact that we have all been hurt, lied to, cheated on, endlessly screwed over etc, so we all put up walls and defences which unfortunately tend to keep out the good guys/gals along with the losers and scumbags. having said that i still dont wanna hear from liars cheats or married guys (or people who seem to think i dont have the right to speak my mind - keep your opinion to yourself if you dont like what i have to say)
ronda :)
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| Do women ever play mind games , lie and waste mens time ?
Posted: 3/30/2008 3:00:23 AM |
(or people who seem to think i dont have the right to speak my mind - keep your opinion to yourself if you dont like what i have to say)
now i feel like a total wanker quoting myself but what i meant to say is if you dont like what i have to say in my profile or my appearance or whatever, i dont want a personal message from you in my mailbox telling me your opinion of me, i dont care what you think.
if its in the forums bring it on! i luv a good clean argument lol
ronda :)
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| Do women ever play mind games , lie and waste mens time ?
Posted: 3/30/2008 3:20:05 AM | | What I was only trying to get across is , is like that Rodriguez song " And I wonder , how many times you been had , and I wonder ......wonder I dooooo . That song covers the whole field , male and female . What I'm saying is , it's not just men who pertain to the "ratbag syndrome" , Im sure . But then when's the last time a bloke has written on his profile —Only hardworking , emotionally stable non-game-playing , broadminded , honest to God women need may apply . Because of the fact that blokes don't normally write this kind of spiel , I can see , yes I can actually see ! , why women think of men as natures opportunists , etc..We men might be pretty much hardwired to only think —"Yea babe what ever works " . No , I can actually see why women like to sift out things upfront right away . But you know what every blokes thinking hey ! And so we come full circle . Nature's got it all worked out hasn't she ! | |
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| Do women ever play mind games , lie and waste mens time ?
Posted: 3/30/2008 3:27:54 AM | i think just the fact that we are all spending our time and energy in a singles site, especially those of us who are no longer teenagers, is testament to the fact that we have all been hurt, lied to, cheated on,
for some that maybe the case but for others (myself included) it is to brouden our oppotunitys as due to work and lack of social life we dont get much of a chance to meet people.
as for players , they are low lifes with a total lack of respect and morals towards others. weather you are male or female. | |
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| Do women ever play mind games , lie and waste mens time ?
Posted: 3/30/2008 3:28:37 AM |
What I'm saying is , it's not just men who pertain to the "ratbag syndrome"
Because of the fact that blokes don't normally write this kind of spiel
You were right the first time because blokes DO write this kind of spiel in their profiles. They want someone who won't hurt them again, who arent' into games, all those type of things that I can't quote without pulling out a few random profiles.
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| Do women ever play mind games , lie and waste mens time ?
Posted: 3/30/2008 3:50:59 AM | I have a saying. It goes like this.
Love my mind, not my body
But play with my body, not my mind.
Basically, if someone is into mind games, regardless if it is male or female, they are not worth being friends with.
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| Do women ever play mind games , lie and waste mens time ?
Posted: 3/30/2008 4:15:19 AM | I think there are alot of women who like to have attention thrown on them, whether that be online or in real life. They will be the ones who have alot of guys on the go and dont just try to get to know one person for real. So yeah I actually think there are more female game players than males.
Males want sex, females want attention, pity the ones caught in both of these type of peoples web | |
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| Do women ever play mind games , lie and waste mens time ?
Posted: 3/30/2008 4:46:18 AM | | As I am not into reading womens profiles, I can not really compare, but I do know the words, no game players are very very common on alot of mens profiles,, which pretty much turns me off as it makes me think they have a fair bit of baggage, and I may be judged on past peoples actions. I'd rather start with an open mind and benefit of the doubt rather than someone who may be inclined to be on the lookout for faults. | |
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| Do women ever play mind games , lie and waste mens time ?
Posted: 3/30/2008 8:17:51 AM | I've often wondered if the "mind games" women complained about were actually their own sometimes.
Before I get shot, here's a scenario:
Man is interested in Woman. Man contacts Woman. Man and Woman go out. Man isn't that interested in Woman. Man doesn't call back, because he's not quite sure how to say "You're OK to talk to but I'm just not attracted to you.
Man is now a "time-wasting game player playing head games". When realistically his only error was being a bit gutless.
Same scenario but the woman suggests "going back to my place". The man follows. He's not that interested in HER, but he DOES have a penis. I'm not defending him, and this isn't me.
He doesn't call her back. He's just not that interested in her. Yes he shouldn't have slept with her, but not everyone is as perfect as me. Anyway, now he's a "player". When all he really is is a little bit shallow.
These scenarios are pretty vague, but I've seen lots of times where women accuse men of all sorts of "game playing" and so on, when actually they're just... stupid.
One of my favourite quotes is Hanlon's Law: "Never blame on malice what can be otherwise explained by incompetence". This is never more true than anything to do with men.
If your question starts with "What was he thinking...." then the answer is simple: he wasn't.
On the Original Post, though, yes and no. Men and women both do it. They just do different things. Every date I've been on recently has ended with me realising that they actually have no interest in me, and I'm the only person who even realised I was on a date.
I believed for a long time that women were evil. The things that were done to me on dates... truly awful. The things I've seen women do to other people, other men, really horrible. But it took a while to realise women aren't actually evil, it just looks like that from underneath their boots.
Women routinely don't realise that men have an interest in them. They don't realise that the man they're talking to has been in love with them for years. They don't realise that when you ask them out to a movie it's NOT just as a friend. They don't realise that you really like them, and thought they were single and that's why they invited you over and cooked you dinner. They don't realise that when you take them to a really expensive restaurant that telling you that you're such a great friend and it's nice to have one friend that there's no sexual feelings with. They don't realise that being told "Of course I love you... like a brother" isn't what we want to hear. They don't realise that you were really looking forward to going out with them, and you've been sitting in a hotel room waiting for them for two hours. All of the above has been done to me by women in the last... year or so? Something like that.
I have a date Wednesday night. I'm honestly considering asking flat out if it's ACTUALLY a date or just as friends... I don't see how it can not be... but I've been wrong before. Regularly. She may just be another game-playing time-waster. :)
We've all been burned before, women and men. We've all got things we don't want, things that have been problems. Women are just more likely to (pointlessly) put them on their profiles. I always wondered how much difference that makes "Oh, NO players? I'd better skip on past then, because I'm a player." Doubt it. | |
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| Do women ever play mind games , lie and waste mens time ?
Posted: 3/30/2008 8:43:47 AM |
These scenarios are pretty vague, but I've seen lots of times where women accuse men of all sorts of "game playing" and so on, when actually they're just... stupid.
i think 'game playing' is a bit of a broad term thats used to cover a whole field of issues.
but i also think that just labelling it as stupidity or 'merely gutless' also downplays the responsibility somewhat.
is it really so much to ask that people are upfront and honest about whats going on?
which ... as you say .. is a problem that you have come across too.
the guy who doesnt call back because he doesnt know quite how to say he is not attracted to the girl .. is about the same, in my books, to someone who says i love you like a bother... i mean brother.
it can all be seen as a method of avoidance..
taking the path of least resistance.
and therefore labeled as playing games with ones emotions.
mind you, i do know that girls can be evil ..
ive been treated like pond scum at times and i must admit, it doesnt feel good in the slightest. :frustrated:
.. but i also know that guys have just as much potential for evil in them too.
there might be plenty of fish .. but sometimes all you find are several eels and and a few squid.
thats just my take on it though.  | |
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| Do women ever play mind games , lie and waste mens time ?
Posted: 3/30/2008 9:07:50 AM | Theres a really interesting book on this subject; Games People Play (subtitle: The Psychology of Human Relationships) by psychiatrist Eric Berne
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Games_People_Play_(book)
We commonly accept games, ie where people achieve outcomes through indirect behaviour, if they're not too painful or fairly common. eg someone who seeks reassurance by saying they look bad or someone who repeats gossip to you ostensibly because they say you need to know but really because they feel powerful if they can put other people off balance.
Most games happen without the person being aware of why they're doing it and they've developed because they help keep the person in their comfort zone, whether thats a good or a bad place.
Most people play psychological games. At some level. You need to be quite adult and aware to cut them out. | |
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