| Top Ten Things to Do in an Elevator
Posted: 4/16/2008 8:02:37 PM | And now, here is tonight's Top 10 List. These are the Top 10 Things to do in an elevator:
10. Whistle the first seven notes of "It's a Small World" incessantly.
9. Pull your gum out of your mouth in long strings.
8. Bring a chair along.
7. Lean against the button panel.
6. Play the harmonica.
5. Bet the other passengers you can fit a quarter in your nose.
4. Everytime the elevator stops at a floor, ask, "Are we there yet?"
3. Meow occasionally.
2. Stare, grinning, at another passenger for a while, and then announce: "I've got new socks on!"
And the Number One Thing to Do in an Elevator:
1. On the highest floor, hold the door open and demand that it stay open until you hear the penny you dropped down the shaft go plink at the bottom. | |
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| Top Ten Things to Do in an Elevator
Posted: 4/18/2008 2:44:40 AM | I only found out recently, when staying in a hotel in London, that there is an elevator maufacturer called 'Schindler'........ www.schindlerlifts.co.uk
Anyone ever heard of Schindler's Lift?  | |
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| Top Ten Things to Do in an Elevator
Posted: 4/20/2008 6:40:20 AM | *When there's only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder. When they turn around shrug your shoulders and look around.
*Push the buttons and pretend they give you a shock. Smile, and go back for more.
*Ask if you can push the button for other people, but push all the buttons so that the elevator stops at every floor, then say "is everyone happy now?"
*Hold the doors open and say your waiting for your friend, after a while let the doors close and say, "Hi Greg. How's your day been?"
*Bounce a superball around the elevator. When it hits someone say, "He doesn't like you"
*Drop a pen and wait until someone reaches to help pick it up, scream, "That's mine!!"
*Stand in the corner, reading a telephone book, laughing.
*Bring a camera, take a group picture then say "I want to remember you just the way you were."
*Move your desk into the elevator and when ever someone gets on, ask if they have an appointment.
*Turn off the lights in the elevator to "conserving energy."
*Leave a brown paper wrapped box in the corner and when someone gets on ask them if they hear something ticking.
*Ask, "Did you feel that? I felt a rumble. Weird."
*Push the call button and when the voice answers, ask, "Mom?"
*Stand really close to someone, sniffing them occasionally | |
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| Top Ten Things to Do in an Elevator
Posted: 4/28/2008 8:35:44 PM | Here are some more 10 ten:
10. When the doors close, shout out: "I'm carrying cash."
9. Look at the elevator button that leads to the boss's office and say, "You'll never be there."
8. Draw on the wall with a crayon.
7. Look up at the speaker playing the elevator music and shout, "I'd like to request Billy Joel, please."
6. Offer someone next to you a tissue while saying, "You have a boogie in your nose."
5. Make strange coughing sounds to make everyone think you have a cold.
4. When the elevator reaches someone's floor, say out loud: You don't want to get off on this floor, trust me, then just stare at the person.
3. Do the YMCA.
2. Open your briefcase and ask, "Are you alright in there, Keebler Elves?"
And the #1 thing to do in an elevator: Hum the theme song to "Laverne and Shirley." | |
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| Top Ten Things to Do in an Elevator
Posted: 4/28/2008 9:23:06 PM | *Draw chalk outlines and lay in them.
*Open your purse or briefcase and whisper "can you breathe in there??"
*Stare at someone in the elevator and just smile.
*Point and giggle at the other people in the elevator.
*Sing "This is the Song That doesn't End" under your breathe, then get out
*If someone brushes against you, say VERY loudly, "you popped my bubble, give it BACK!!!"
*Start to cry when the doors close and cheer when they open
*Tell the other people in the elevator it's your first time and to 'be gentle'
*Fold your laundry
*Talk on your cell about embarassing 'bodily functions' and when people give you weird looks say, 'this IS a private conversation.. sheesh, nosey bodies'
*Practice martial arts
*Ask everyone for their business cards so you can 'keep in touch' | |
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| Top Ten Things to Do in an Elevator
Posted: 4/29/2008 8:14:28 PM | And the list goes on:
10. Tell everyone in the elevator that at this very moment, a Slinky is rolling down the office building stairs.
9. Tell everyone in the elevator you used to be a Security Guard in your previous workplace, and that you always guarded the elevator.
8. Pretend you are arguing with your good angel/bad angel on your shoulders.
7. Put your foot in your briefcase and ask someone if they can help you fit into it.
6. Ask the occupants to join you in the phone booth later to fill it to full capacity.
5. Sip your coffee while making a slurping sound.
4. Everytime the elevator dings, fake a hiccup.
3. As you get off onto your floor, tell the occupants, "I'm the next contestant on the Price is Right."
2. Hand out a pamphlet that says, "Save the Elevator."
And the #1 thing to do in an elevator: Everytime the elevator dings, sing: "Ding Dong, the witch is dead." | |
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| Top Ten Things to Do in an Elevator
Posted: 4/30/2008 9:27:50 PM | Gotta keep them going. Here's more:
10. Press one of the buttons, thinking you are looking at a Vending Machine.
9. Put a Gumball machine in the corner of the elevator.
8. On one of the elevator walls, put a "Wet Paint" sign on it, and whenever someone enters the elevator, lean against the wall with the sign.
7. Rip up a piece of loose-leaf paper and throw it into the air like confetti everytime someone gets off the elevator.
6. Tell everyone your new name is: Mr. Peabody
5. Put coins in one of your pockets and continue to move them around so they make noise.
4. Press one of the floor buttons and ask, "Yeah, Could I get a Double Cheeseburger?"
3. Randomly say: "I wonder what superhero changes in here?" "Superman changes in a phone booth."
2. Put the elevator on Hold and tell everyone, "No one moves till they tell me the capital of Vermont."
And the #1 thing to do in an elevator: Drop some dice on the floor and yell, "Yahtzee!" | |
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| Top Ten Things to Do in an Elevator
Posted: 4/30/2008 10:35:13 PM | I start reciting lines from Speed to anyone who'll listen.
Pop quiz, hotshot. There's a bomb on a bus. Once the bus goes 50 miles an hour, the bomb is armed. If it drops below 50, it blows up. WHAT DO YOU DO? WHAT DO YOU DO JACK?
Then I usually get tazered. | |
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| Top Ten Things to Do in an Elevator
Posted: 5/1/2008 12:38:30 PM | | Whenever you're alone in the elevator going down to a lobby that you know will be crowded, scream at the top of your lungs and stop just as the doors start to open. The "WTF?" look on peoples' faces is priceless. | |
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| Top Ten Things to Do in an Elevator
Posted: 5/4/2008 1:07:22 AM | More are here to see:
10. Play a game of "Jacks" on the Elevator Floor with at least 10 people inside.
9. Tell everyone that you setup some dominos on the top of the elevator, and as soon as it moves, they'll fall into a pattern.
8. Give the person next to you a mint and say, "It wasn't my idea."
7. Before the elevator doors open, say out loud, "Okay, whoever was last to enter the elevator is first to get out."
6. Take your shoes off.
5. Press an elevator button and ask, "Is this the floor where the rats live?"
4. Occasionally knock on the elevator wall behind your back.
3. Sneak some Monopoly money into someone's backpocket.
2. Say the alphabet backwards, purposely messing up as you go along.
And the #1 thing to do in an elevator: If you are wearing a tie, put it on your forehead and tell everyone you're the Karate Kid as an adult. | |
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| Top Ten Things to Do in an Elevator
Posted: 5/4/2008 9:53:35 PM | a totally unrelated fact .....new buildings might have 2 elevators in one shaft, co-ordinated by computers to save square footage .....
LOL and kudos for your TOP 10 ..... very funny | |
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| Top Ten Things to Do in an Elevator
Posted: 5/4/2008 11:56:32 PM | Thanks for the comments everyone. Most of these are coming off the top of my head:
here are some more.
10. Turn your cellphone up on loud so that when you push the cellphone buttons, they beep and echo off the elevator walls.
9. Look up at the ceiling and ponder why the lights are so bright, then ask everyone, "Are we closer to heaven?"
8. Pull out a deck of 52 playing cards, ask someone close by to pick a card, then say, "Alright, now I have 51 cards left."
7. Laugh out loud at someone who is reading the Wall Street Journal.
6. Turn the lights off in the elevator and ask, "Don't panic, I'm a professional, let me find the switch."
5. Look at your reflection in the elevator doors and say, "Hey! When did he get here!?"
4. Before everyone gets off the elevator, give everyone raffle tickets and say, "Today's prize is an elevator key chain."
3. If the elevator is on the lobby, hold the elevator doors open and say, "I'm waiting for Santa Claus to get on the elevator."
2. Look at the person next to you and say, "Are you my long lost twin?"
And the #1 thing to do in an elevator: If you are the first person in the elevator, put a ladder in the corner and sit near the top. When 10 people enter the elevator, pretend you're giving the Traffic Report but call it "Action 5 Elevator News" | |
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| Top Ten Things to Do in an Elevator
Posted: 5/7/2008 8:08:52 PM | And you thought the list was over...nope. Here's more:
10. Put a piece of chewed gum on the elevator wall and say, "I'm starting a collection."
9. If you have documents in your hands, fake that you're going to drop them everytime the elevator stops at a floor.
8. Make Barnyard animal sounds occasionally.
7. Put your arms up as high as you can, and if someone stares at you, tell them that you're Gumby.
6. Walk into the elevator with your jacket, shirt, and tie on backwards.
5. Press the elevator call button and when someone answers say, "Would you like to buy a Wonka bar?"
4. Whenever the elevator goes up from the Lobby floor, shout out, "88 miles per hour!"
3. If you are chewing gum, blow a bubble, than take out the blown bubble and show it to everyone in the elevator.
2. Tell everyone you were voted off of "American Idol," and you're trying to find a job as the building's security guard.
And the #1 thing to do in an elevator: Post an "Elevator Passenger of the Month" picture on the elevator wall on the 1st day of every month. | |
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| Top Ten Things to Do in an Elevator
Posted: 5/11/2008 10:37:12 PM | Thought of some more to look at that fit this topic:
10. Put a "Police Line Up" background on one of the elevator walls and stand in front of it whenever someone enters the elevator.
9. Tell everyone you've heard better elevator music than in the previous place you worked.
8. Do an impersonation of Elmer Fudd.
7. Whenever someone in the elevator talks to you, tell them, "Darn, I was actually ignoring you!"
6. Hand everyone a note saying, "I'm carrying a hidden camera."
5. If someone wants you to press the elevator button for them, ask: "What have you ever done for me?"
4. Take your shoes off and sing the theme song to "The Beverly Hillbillies."
3. Press the call button and ask if you can speak to the elevator janitor about putting in a Spa.
2. Before the elevator doors open, randomly ask someone to spell 5 states backwards.
And the #1 thing to do in an elevator: If someone presses your floor button for you, say to them: "That made me mad-and trust me you don't want me to get mad," then rip your shirt up like The Incredible Hulk. | |
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| Top Ten Things to Do in an Elevator
Posted: 5/12/2008 12:58:22 PM | Msg 14
yes - its a brand name in elevators - i suppose you also heard of schindler's list (not lift) - as in movie....
Now I would have thought that an Aussie would understand the British sense of humour. | |
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| Top Ten Things to Do in an Elevator
Posted: 5/18/2008 9:23:57 AM | Came up with some more:
10. Tell everyone in the elevator that the security camera adds 10 pounds.
9. Offer someone a Mentos and tell the person your idea is to get rid of them on the elevator.
8. Whenever someone enters the elevator, and you know their name, add the word "mister" to it (ex. Mr. Harrision-mister!)
7. Bring the copy machine into the elevator and tell everyone they can copy their face for a $1.
6. Put a flyer on the elevator wall that reads, "Stairs are in extinct."
5. Sit in a beanbag chair in the corner of the elevator.
4. If someone's pen falls on the floor, tell the person, "Don't litter!"
3. If there's a new employee in the elevator, tell the person he/she is Rookie of the Month.
2. Chew on a Butterfinger in a loud and annoying fashion.
And the #1 thing to do in an elevator: Pull the emergency brake and, after everyone angrily stares at you, tell them, "Sorry, I thought this was a carnival ride." | |
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| Top Ten Things to Do in an Elevator
Posted: 5/18/2008 9:55:39 AM | -Gas it up real stinky with some slow silent ones and then stare at the fattest person on the elevator.
-Ask everyone on the elevator how much they weigh and then add it up and announce that you are over capacity.
-Drop a coin as you are desending and take bets if it will hit the floor or ceiling first.
-Turn around and face the wall while riding and laugh out loud.
-Bring a caged canary and watch for signs of oxygen depletion.
-Stand on 3 pillows with a smug look on your face.
-Give disdainful looks at people who smell like cigerettes.
-Eavesdrop on a couples conversation and offer your two cents worth.
-Unzip your pants.
-Shhish everyone who talks. | |
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