| Not single/not looking...recently...er
Posted: 4/29/2008 3:56:23 PM | Ok..I did a thread search and couldn't find this question..
I changed my status yesterday...from friends to not single/not looking...and my email count has gone up..and is more persistant...will need to block soon and I don't like blocking unless I have to..
Why????
Why do some men mail you regardless?
What is with that?
VVV..no I really thought emails would lessen..I guess I am a numpty on that score then! | |
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| Not single/not looking...recently...er
Posted: 4/29/2008 4:04:04 PM | I can only speak for myself Blueskies123, but I would not e-mail you with either status. The reason being is because I am looking for something long term. And I see you in these forums from time to time, and I think you know the answer anyway. Some guys just dont care, dont take hints, or dont read entire profiles. If you could put that you were looking for a" babboon" in your profile, you would still get mail.  | |
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| Not single/not looking...recently...er
Posted: 4/29/2008 4:33:07 PM | I am not sure why your email count would go up, nor would I base the assessment off a one day study. You don't describe what kind of emails they are, so since you have friends listed on your profile, I am assuming that at least some are from people that wanted to befriend you.
If the emails are bothering you, or become an inconvenience you could always clamp down on your mail settings, and this should take care of the problem. I see nothing in your profile that says not to email you, so I am not sure why this is such an issue you felt the need to post it.
edit*******************
sorry at end of, the about me portion of your profile I do see, not to email you without a picture. I wonder, a person who is not single and not looking, plus looking for friends only, is concerned about what the person emailing them, looks like????? HMMMMM Well you have your few minutes of fame I guess. | |
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| Not single/not looking...recently...er
Posted: 4/29/2008 4:58:06 PM | I have heard this from guys also - who have "only here for the forums" and their email count goes up. LOL
I don't know. I changed my status a coupleof days ago too...funny bout that! I can't say I've gotten more email or less than usual, but sure got a boatload of "peeks" for someone who has a hidden profile! It's been hidden a couple of weeks and as soon as I hid it my "peek" count went way down. Then I change my status (and still hidden) and it jumps way up.
I'm barely even posting on the forums right now (too little time, not a lot to say either) so where the heck are they finding me????
Congrats on your profile change, btw. Mine is more of a personal decision than a joint one. He is still all tied in knots trying to convince himself he doesn't want a girlfriend even though he seems to have found himself one in me. LOL I changed my profile b/c I consider myself to be not single/not looking, not so much because of any new commitment. *shrug*
Kaylie | |
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| Not single/not looking...recently...er
Posted: 4/29/2008 5:03:37 PM |
Well...You are wearing a bright pink skirt/dress thing with one knee raised and the inside of your thigh is pointing to the camera. Your lifting your hair up in a demeanor thats asking for movie star like attention. All this seems so obvious that your question doesn't even seem real.
Dude!
Try to focus on the question.
OP had the exact same photo 3 days ago... she changed her status and nuber of emails increased... she is wondering if that is somehow related to the fact that she took herself off the market, so to speak.
She did NOT change the photo, so comments about her appearence are not only tactless (which they are!), but also off topic.
There. Is that clear?
OT, someone told me that same thing happened to them... I don't really know... Did the content of messages also change?
Do they approach you as friend, or still hitting on you?
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| Not single/not looking...recently...er
Posted: 4/29/2008 10:54:26 PM | I still get emails from people interested. The best one was a one liner that said "I read your profile and you sound great". My profile says four times that I am not looking, the headline, the status, the opening paragraph and closing paragraph.
I sent a nice little message asking about a couple of her interests and a gentle reminder of my status.. she read/deleted my reply... I chortled. Women do not read profiles either, even if they send an email saying they did. | |
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| Not single/not looking...recently...er
Posted: 4/30/2008 5:33:38 AM | | I did notice that you've still got a listing indicating a preference for a "first date" - that may be part of the problem.... | |
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| Not single/not looking...recently...er
Posted: 4/30/2008 8:37:30 AM | It's true that your profile doesn't quite sound like someone who's "not looking".
There's no mention of a special some that I spotted.
Maybe a bit of a tweak there might change things.
Of course, part of it would also be from the jerks and players out there. A lot of people who are "not looking" get a lot of contact. Why? Because there's ***holes out there who see such people as a "challenge".
Back when I was seeing someone, and I had my profile changed to "Not Single/Not Looking". And even made mention of my special someone in my profile...
I got far more daily contacts than when I was listed as single. I'd shoot up to maybe 50+ messages a day. It was crazy.
Most of them were clearly sleeze. "Ladies" telling me how they could do better than my love. How they could easily steal me away. How I should join them for a naughty fling. Etc...
It was truly pathetic.
Now that I'm single again... I don't get as many contacts. The ones who do contact me are the good ones... people actually looking for someone serious.
The ones looking for a fling seem to pass me by. Mostly anyway. I still get the odd one where someone's asking for a night of wild sex. Sorry, I don't care if she thinks that I'm a tasty bit of man meat... that's just not my thing.
The wild sex is reserved for the woman I am with... when we're at that point in the relationship. ;)
For the most part... if you're getting improper messages... you can always just block the people. Or hell, have some fun with them if you're bored. But you know that you don't have to put up with such. | |
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| Not single/not looking...recently...er
Posted: 4/30/2008 9:01:09 PM | | I only have 2 theories one is that these guys like the thrill idea of an affair type relationship or they simply don't read your profile. | |
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| Not single/not looking...recently...er
Posted: 5/1/2008 7:25:52 AM | | Can't explain why the number would be more than usual, maybe it's just that time of year where everyone wants love lol. But your email status probably doesn't stop alot of people just because things change all the time and it doesn't necessarily mean that you update your profile to go with it. Guys might just be thinking it could be an outdated status. | |
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| Not single/not looking...recently...er
Posted: 5/1/2008 12:25:53 PM | To aall those who mentioned the picture..it's been there for ages..it was my status that changed this week is all.
The question was about status not about my pictures.
Adam..I see your point there..seems a little soon for that.
To the other person who mentioned my first date preferences..er..did you actually read it? It's not exactly dinner and a moonlight stroll.. | |
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| Not single/not looking...recently...er
Posted: 5/1/2008 4:22:49 PM | | Pictures speak a 1000 words, and the first picture I see is overwriting all the text in your profile. It's saying the complete opposite of what you mean to say. | |
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| Not single/not looking...recently...er
Posted: 5/1/2008 6:17:00 PM |
To the other person who mentioned my first date preferences..er..did you actually read it? It's not exactly dinner and a moonlight stroll..
Most dates aren't. Yet, you still talk about " a date". It's not really a problem, cause men are used to being told something one moment from a female,,,,,and then not much later, we hear something completly different. Your profile reaks of confusion, and don't take the statement personal,,,,it just is. | |
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| Not single/not looking...recently...er
Posted: 5/2/2008 10:29:37 AM | | lol when i changed mine i got more mail also! i get about 5-7 messgages a day. i used to get 3-5.. or less. guys write to me, without even looking at my profile sometimes, so they assume im single. which im NOT. lol. i just send a message back saying "sorry im not single, i have a wonderfull boyfriend already" but yep i see what you mean, strange... it just proves they dont look past the photo sometimes... | |
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| Not single/not looking...recently...er
Posted: 5/2/2008 11:21:22 AM | I would say those men see your thumbnail pic in the "members near you that recently checked their mail" header and decide to send you an e-mail from looking at that particular picture alone. They don't even scroll down to read your profile.
At least that is true for most e-mails that I have received since changing my profile to "NS / NL". | |
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| Not single/not looking...recently...er
Posted: 5/2/2008 11:27:06 AM | Y'see I guess if I see nice pic of a guy..but it says he is not single/not looking I presume that he is either single but ot looking or with someone and not looking...
What I don't understand is when my exact same pics were up and it said 'single' I got less mail than I do now..still with the same pics.
Crazygirl..yeah..*scratches head and wanders off*
*wanders back*..and they ask you out for a date and they live in Michigan..when you live in England....
Hey ho..I guess this subject is done! | |
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