Ridds
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Joined: 4/26/2008
Msg: 1 | |
| Say you single on POF but you're really not...
Posted: 4/29/2008 9:45:15 PM | I've been on the site for a few days now. I've come across a few people whose profiles sate that they are single. I then get a response saying thanks but I'm not single and not looking. 'What the hell are you doing on the site if you're not single?' It's a dating site!! It's really annoying. That and the fact that you take the time to write someone and they don't even have the decency of replying back. I guess one can't complain about a free thing though eh?  | |
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| Say you single on POF but you're really not...
Posted: 4/29/2008 9:51:18 PM | Ridds you have 2 questions here...
1. Not Single/Not Looking: Simple enough, people are here to meet people and will often move from single to NS/NL while they are in the early stages of pursuing something with someone.
Other times, they are here for the forums and for relationships they developed while they were here looking.
In addition, they may use this as a way to say they are not interested in you.
2. No email reply: Simple also, they don't owe an e-mail reply. No need to go any further on that one.... | |
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Ridds
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Joined: 4/26/2008
Msg: 6 | |
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| Say you single on POF but you're really not...
Posted: 4/29/2008 10:14:59 PM | Ridds, as much as we'd all like to live in a perfect Walgreen' commercial, where people are polite, proper, and interested in us just because we wrote, that is not the real world of on line dating... OR real world either...
Ever go up to someone at a bar and ask them if they'd like a drink or something, and they tell you no thanks, they are seeing someone... Even though you have seen them there for maybe a couple weeks and always are with same sexed friends?
I like getting it up front to, however, back to your complaint...  Life is what it is... Not perfect, but ya just roll with it... | |
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| Say you single on POF but you're really not...
Posted: 4/30/2008 3:22:44 AM | I would say you did a fine job of complaining. Don’t sell yourself short.
You are new here. In a few short weeks you could be bitter and resentful
if you put your mind to it.
It IS a dating site, not a grocery store. Despite what many would prefer, scrolling through
a list of potential dates/mates is not like rolling your cart down an aisle, pulling a few
Ideal Mates ( Pat. Pending) off the shelf and then rolling towards the check-out.
The system could work out that way if it did not involve people. They just screw things up, yes ?
They have the audacity to have their own opinions, wants, needs, and tastes.
They also get to deal with other people who lie, annoy, exaggerate, and become impatient
when their own Dream Date is on back-order.
So loose the Grocery Store model and think more along the lines of the 1849 Gold Rush.
There are a few who get lucky and find that huge nugget after 15 minutes that leaves them SFL.
But the majority of folks who come here will pan long hours and be lucky to get more for their time
than a few specks of dust. Either learn to enjoy the process or be ready to start typing these words
... often:
I am a Nice Guy and no woman has fallen from the sky to make me happy ! What’s wrong with you women? Why don’t you want to make me happy ? Have i mentioned I am a Nice Guy ?
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| Say you single on POF but you're really not...
Posted: 4/30/2008 4:34:07 AM | It's a nice way to get rid of you. Kind of like the guy who wrote me the other day and said ''i've met someone recently, good luck to you."
Of course we could just "read/delete'' . But, then you'd start a forum post about that. | |
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| Say you single on POF but you're really not...
Posted: 4/30/2008 7:18:53 AM | OK your new so I will be kind.
Trust me when I tell you that you can be glad that you got a response at all. People on a dating site can be rude and inconsiderate and you will have to learn to deal with that. It would be nice to get a response even if its a no thank you. Truth is they owe you nothing. There are those that feel rejected when they do not get a response to a message~~~~~~~I however would tell you that you cant be rejected by someone you dont know.'
In a perfect pond you will throw in your line and assume if you have the right bait, you will reel in the perfect fish. Unfortunately parts of the pond are polluted, you just have to move around and keep casting.
Good Luck............stay positive........... | |
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| Say you single on POF but you're really not...
Posted: 4/30/2008 8:58:26 AM | Maybe they are just trying to be nice and tell you they are not interested in you or maybe they are lying.
Lying on a dating site???? Nah, no way, never happen
You are new here - hang around and you will see this topic over and over again.
People lie, it's a fact of life - throw that rotten fish back and go fishin' again!
Good luck and happy 
~tb~ | |
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| Say you single on POF but you're really not...
Posted: 4/30/2008 9:12:00 AM | Who really cares, OP? They're not interested in you, so just move on to the next fish! The reason they give is pretty irrelevant. Most people will not tell you what they truly feel in that instance, anyway.
Tony | |
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| Say you single on POF but you're really not...
Posted: 4/30/2008 10:34:16 AM | In the options of our status it doesn't give us the option to say we are dating. However, it gives the option to select of marriage. This is rather contradictory. Marriage should be forever, dating isn't necessarily so.  
I met someone recently so i wrote it in my profile. However, i still stay on this site to speak with others just as friends. I like meeting people as long as they do not have an objective to ruin my new relationship.
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| Say you single on POF but you're really not...
Posted: 5/4/2008 4:35:36 PM | | I personally joined this site about 4 days ago and I messaged someone that day. The very next day she had responded stating she was interested. I wrote her back and she replied the next day again. On top of her email that day, I had one from another girl that was interested in getting to know me. Even though she was good looking and her profile didn't have anything on it that made me dislike her, I wrote her back and told her that I was already talking to someone. I didn't want the burden of juggling two people at the same time. So to answer your question, I personally wasn't lying but whose to say that she wasn't. I felt that you should know that some people on here could be telling you the truth. The problem is, most them probably don't. | |
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| Say you single on POF but you're really not...
Posted: 5/4/2008 7:40:14 PM | I do not see the problem with people in relationships on here for the fourms as long as they indicate as such in their profile. If one is not single then they need to make it clear. If you are emailing people listed as single and then they tell you they are not, they are just not interested in you. They should either not email back or if they do, be honest and not hide behind an excuse.
~Carrie | |
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| Say you single on POF but you're really not...
Posted: 5/4/2008 7:52:11 PM | thank god you are a n00b otherwise someone may have ripped you a new one already for even posting this. lol
like others I will give my opinion taking into account you are new. Thread search "Read/Delete" there are tons of threads on this and peoples opinions about it...basically it boils down to what you've already been told. No one owes anyone a reply, it can be rude, but some people get abuse for replying with a simple, "thanks but I'm not interested"
as for her reply of not single/not looking, perhaps she forgot to change her status. Perhaps she's just here for forums. Perhaps she just wasn't interested and it was her way of saying no thanks. Don't be offended, plenty of fish out there, plenty of other reasons to become bitter...but it won't happen if you don't let it get to you :D
Fish on... | |
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