| How long do you wait........
Posted: 5/2/2008 2:59:31 PM | Until you send a response to a message.
There is really no rule to this.
As for me if I am interested in a girl who sends me a message and I'm on-line when I receive it, I will send a reply back that day, or even that min if I have time.
I know allot of very people I have talked to in the past that say you need to wait a few days before you make contact, otherwise it makes you look disparate,I find that do be one of the stupidest thing I have ever heard.
So my question to you girls is, what are your thought if you see an instant response from a message you sent to guy. | |
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| How long do you wait........
Posted: 5/2/2008 3:07:26 PM | ARRRGH!
If you're online...send a response.
....and if your not...well ya cant...so do it next time you log in.
Dont play stupid Time Games. Sheesh... | |
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| How long do you wait........
Posted: 5/2/2008 3:08:38 PM | I am with you on this one.
If you online and of course, have time, answer it. I am very picky about my email - at work or home - I, for one, like to answer everything right away. | |
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| How long do you wait........
Posted: 5/2/2008 3:11:03 PM | | I agree. Don't even think like this. Unless you're in junior high, stop playing these sorts of games. If you want to respond, then respond. | |
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| How long do you wait........
Posted: 5/2/2008 3:16:12 PM | | I have a friend that is in his 30's and he says " Dude, you don't message a girl back the same day, it makes you look to desprate" I was like " Dude...." what are you like 5 years old.......grow up man" | |
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| How long do you wait........
Posted: 5/2/2008 3:16:53 PM | | Yes, most people answer right away if they are interested. If they are not then of course they don't respond and hit delete usually or let POF automatically delete them after a certain number of days. The only desperate people are the ones emailing a person again and again and again and again, even after it's clear the other party is not interested. | |
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| How long do you wait........
Posted: 5/2/2008 3:17:35 PM |
" Dude, you don't message a girl back the same day, it makes you look to desprate" I was like " Dude...." what are you like 5 years old.......grow up man"
^^^ Yeah Dude...I agree | |
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| How long do you wait........
Posted: 5/2/2008 4:21:26 PM | One of the most amazing people I have ever met online has shown me that patience is a great virtue... Sometimes it would be weeks before we could e-mail each other back and forth... But, it has always been worth the wait...
Don't play games and don't assume their schedule is set around you... Just relax and go with the flow... Si eram is adveho | |
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| How long do you wait........
Posted: 5/2/2008 4:33:47 PM |
what are your thought if you see an instant response from a message you sent to guy
I like it. Sometimes I take a little extra time to compose a reply, sometimes I'm simply not online when emails come in. But I would never...well, probably never...intentionally wait to message someone because I'm afraid they'll think I'm desperate. | |
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| How long do you wait........
Posted: 5/2/2008 4:39:47 PM | | i agree with kyn ..just answer it. if you wait days then she will assume you are uninterested when u really are interested. by then she could have met some other nice man she is interested in. your loss. it does not make a person look desperate at all. that is just ridiculous. | |
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| How long do you wait........
Posted: 5/2/2008 6:01:51 PM | I answer right away if I am interested, or as soon as I have time to write a nice note back. If you don't answer right away , it will look as though you are not really interested.
If I'm not interested I'll write back later and just make a quick I don't see we have much in common, thank them for the letter, and answer any questions they might have asked. | |
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| How long do you wait........
Posted: 5/2/2008 8:59:17 PM | Oh my freeking goodness!!!!!! I hate this crap.
Let me ask YOU a question. Do you want a gal who plays games? Then stop dwelling on manipulative ploys.  | |
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| How long do you wait........
Posted: 5/2/2008 9:07:54 PM | I write people back when I have the time. Sometimes I have mail that does not get responded to for awhile and sometimes I write back right away. It depends on my mood and it depends on if I have the time or not. Anyone who gets mad that it takes me time to write back is not worth it. Anyone who thinks if I write back right away that I am desperate is not worth it.
~Carrie | |
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| How long do you wait........
Posted: 5/4/2008 6:30:37 PM | | Online dating is a numbers game. Playing a time game will only leave you in the dust. | |
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| How long do you wait........
Posted: 5/4/2008 6:42:19 PM | If I have time to reply when I read it , then I do it right away, if I dont have the time, I'll reply on my next log-in.
Games in any shape or form are for kids , if you are interested in some-one then just show it. There was one guy I was exchanging e-mails with and he took 3 - 5 days to respond to an e-mail even though he had logged onto the site many times each day in between. It didnt do much for me other than make me feel very unimportant, and that he wasnt interested at all. | |
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| How long do you wait........
Posted: 5/4/2008 7:29:29 PM | OP -If you are interested in the woman then reply when you get the message at that time. If you have time. Don't play games and do the "waiting game" number. You could be left out in the cold, as it were.
It doesn't make you look desperate, it makes you look interested.
That's what you are here for, isn't it? To find someone to date? | |
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| How long do you wait........
Posted: 5/5/2008 12:49:14 AM | | I was at a friends place for dinner the other day and we were just having a discussion similar to this...a friend of mine just recently met someone and are just starting to date...thus far we've been quite impressed with him..we told the guys who were present at the dinner to take note... :P For one, he called shortly after they met...so he did not play this "waiting game"...and he actually called when were there for dinner too...lol...secondly, when they were out for dinner, while the server was being a little flirtatious...he did not respond nor encourage her over friendliness...this kind of behavior from a man suggests, from a female perspective, that he's a confident and respectful guy who doesn't play games...hope this helps :) | |
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| How long do you wait........
Posted: 5/5/2008 8:44:06 AM | Well I am glad to hear everybody is on the same page when it comes to replying to messages.
If I have the time I will reply to a message right aways, or next time I log on.
But I have ran into cases where I will be chatting back and forth with someone, all is going good then I will send them a message and even thou they are on-line that day my message goes unread for a few days...........talk about a mind game.
Is seems like we all need to go back to grade 5, where if you like someone you pass them a note saying "Do you like me....Yes Or No " if it was only that easy lol.
Everyone can learn something from this post.
If someone is interested in you, you should see a reply in a day or more, and if not there not interested. | |
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| How long do you wait........
Posted: 5/5/2008 9:42:27 AM | A follow up on the "she may have a busy schedule" posts...
I understand people have busy schedules, and if I don't receive a quick reply I am ok with that. However, how long of a wait is long enough? And I'll also through in, if a person checks your profile after reading your message, does that usually mean that they liked the message at least? (Oddly enough everyone but one person I have messaged has checked my profile after reading my message. I would assume that is the common thing to do, but then again, why do so if they have no intent of writing back?)
For example, I messaged this one girl about two weeks ago now. She read the message the day I sent it, and I know that she has been online multiple times since she read it. Now at first I thought maybe she's busy, maybe she's talking seriously with someone else, and is just putting mine on the back burner, etc... however after this much time I am thinking it is more than likely a sign that she is not interested. I have also sent out two more messages about a week ago. Neither of them have responded yet, while they have both read my message. One deleted it after reading it too, so I don't have high hopes of hearing back from her :).
So as posted above (by other people) it seems most of us would reply right when we get the message or the next time we log in. But, how long should someone wait to see if it is that they aren't interested or that they just have a really busy schedule? Because one thing I would hate to do would be to start talking to someone new, and receive a positive response, only to then receive a positive message back from someone I wrote off as not being interested... | |
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| How long do you wait........
Posted: 5/5/2008 10:48:45 AM | I love getting a reply right away. It's frustrating to have some kind of dialogue then suddenly have to wait a day or two. They forget you can see if your sent message is read by going to "sent messages" LOL If it's not read then at least don't take it as personal.
One the one hand I like to think, don't read until you can reply, on the other, don't make us wait a week. But really that's a sign itself right? LOL On the other hand you want to know the guy has a job and a life outside the computer, but I'd say within a day is a resonable time frame in most cases - if they have no computer and no intentions of being on it often enough to send and recieve messages, don't be on here!
I've heard the 'wait a bit' thing too and sorry but I can't do it. I can't do the games. If I get a message I'm answering it unless I'm really hard pressed for time. And if it happens to be from someone I'm interested in and have already heard from I may even read the message knowing I can't reply at that time and send a one liner "Reply later, have a good day" so they know I care.
People are worth caring about even if you have NO interest and have to come up with a nice way to say "good luck to you please move on".
This is really like the modern equivalent of how long before a guy should call about a second date isn't it? And really desperate can be the flip side of 'interested and in tune' with you. It's all how you look at it. My friend has helped me see even more of the positive in life and I'm grateful for that! | |
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| How long do you wait........
Posted: 5/5/2008 10:54:22 AM | Quote: Because one thing I would hate to do would be to start talking to someone new, and receive a positive response, only to then receive a positive message back from someone I wrote off as not being interested...
I personally think if you are just at the messaging stage and not meeting on a regular basis or having dates, it's ok to message more than one person. How serious can it get through mails anyway?
Dating should be a more exclusive thing. (Just my thoughts) | |
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| How long do you wait........
Posted: 5/5/2008 11:00:50 AM | | What the heck? Wait a few days to respond to a freakin' message?? This is absurd! If you're interested in someone, respond as soon as possible! My gosh, all these games people play are so infantile! | |
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| How long do you wait........
Posted: 5/5/2008 11:03:49 AM | Just reply to the message... unless its really not very nice...sheesh.  Why play games?  | |
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