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| Two adages, one question
Posted: 5/4/2008 9:02:46 PM | Being currently single as I am, recently I've pondered the conflict between the old adage "It is better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all" and the lyrics of the song by the progressive rock band YES, "The owner of a lonely heart is so much better than the owner of a broken heart."
I usually approach old adages with the seriousness I approach that bs that says "Sticks and stones will break my bones, but words will never hurt me", but I find I am taking the content of these conflicting adages a bit more seriously.
The "better to have loved and lost " one makes sense because I think that it is a real compliment to one's spirit to know that, even though the relationship has ended, they definitely have been loved, and because of that, odds are they'll be loved again, versus going through your whole life never being loved, at least romantically.
But then, paradoxically, to me, the lyrics of the YES song also seem to present me with a sound truth. The owner of a lonely heart could indeed be a lot better off than the owner a broken heart, because, in a relationship, before you break up, you have to put up with a lot of bullcrap, and then when you are out of the relationship, you realize that you have to start all over again and just wish you were single and never entered that relationship to begin with, or so I'm told. That rings true with me, especially around where I live, where alot of the girls I have come across are just full of bs and drama (I really hate that word, but I find I am using it more and more lately.) I mean, I have a girl I kind of like right now that is the exception to that rule, but nothing has happened yet, and only the Allmighty knows if anything will happen. But I don't know, I just find myself kind of torn between thes two adages. Anyone out there have any input? | |
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| Two adages, one question
Posted: 5/4/2008 9:11:34 PM | Both are essentially true to a point, but consider this....
How can you grow if you don't take any risks? Even a terrible experience could be useful if you learn from it....
It might be easier to just bury your head in the sand and let the world pass you by, but if you don't accept a certain element of risk, you might just not ever find a wonderful relationship out there.
It's trial and error, really.... | |
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| Two adages, one question
Posted: 5/4/2008 10:04:33 PM | Being a person who learns from experience (MY experience, not other people's) I am inclined to throw caution to the wind and go for the costly option of "better to have loved and lost than otherwise" .
Since experience is of great value, you might have to pay dearly for it, and a broken heart could be the price you 'll be called to pay.
Other than the two adages, there is a third case scenario, where you can love, not lose, and be the owner of a happy heart for a very long time. You are too young to be pessimistic.
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| Two adages, one question
Posted: 5/5/2008 12:10:33 AM | No offense, but I am not so sure if the allmighty knows or is really concerned about people he gave free will to in regards to love... Kind of the law of you all have a choice, so do the right thing...
If you like this girl but nothing has happened, then here's an adage of "nothing ventured, nothing gained..."
You're life is up to you, you can play it safe, and never take chances for fear of a broken heart, or you can grab the bull by the horns and say no matter what, I am gonna live life to its fullest risks of broken hearts and all...
Sure it don't feel good to get hurt, but does sitting around wondering which adage safely applies make you feel better? | |
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| Two adages, one question
Posted: 5/5/2008 1:13:02 AM | Yeah,
RUSH lyrics "why are we here? because we're here,roll the bones!" Means we're lucky to be in the here and now,take your chance,get on with it. | |
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| Two adages, one question
Posted: 5/5/2008 1:27:47 AM | Guess it's kinda like learning to walk...you fall on your butt a lot, but if you don't get up and try, you're going to miss out on a lot of good stuff.
It is a risk, but I'd rather take that risk than miss out on something wonderful. Even with the "loves" that didn't work out, there was a lesson learned. And, if you keep the right attitude, then the bad get's lost in all the memories of the good.
I'd do it ALL again, wouldn't miss if for the world! | |
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