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Posted: 5/5/2008 10:57:39 PM | Alright I feel like a little POFer public service....
What have you got for me?
I'm not much for sugar coatings if something is aweful... so ask only if you can handle the answer.
Angelic's Rating Scale:
1 -  ( eeek! you scare me... )
2 -  (I've seen this 20 times before)
3 -  (Work is needed here)
4 -  (I'm paying attention...)
5 -  (If you were just my type, in my area, in my range and orientation.... roar!) | |
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Posted: 5/6/2008 9:44:39 AM | Handsome,
FFS, START YOUR OWN THREAD ALREADY! Are you afraid of what is in store for you from us fellow reviewers?! =) *anxiously awaiting the lionskeepers to toss in some fresh meat* | |
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Posted: 5/6/2008 12:24:33 PM | | Is somebody going to throw this girl a bone to catapult her to review stardom already?! Christoff, if you need to pop your cherry you can have a crack at mine. I'm sure someone's been waiting to rip me a new one as I've done my best to restrain from doing it to others. A guy I reviewed the other night emailed me yesterday and asked me when I was going to start my own thread so he could review mine. It made me smirk. | |
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Posted: 5/6/2008 3:16:33 PM | Handsome:
First of all, I do like your profile it's definitely one of the better ones. I see you have already taken a lot of other people's advice to heart and spruced it up. I do have some suggestions for you:
Good Stuff:
I like the pop culture reference in your headline.
I like the variety of pictures and I demonstration of your interests in them as you get better pictures I might replace some of those with better quality lighting ones and such.
I like that you show personality in your profile (There were laughs and it was fun)
Suggestions:
You main picture - it is a very flattering photo except it looks like a another woman is kissing you. (maybe she is!) and I would probably loose that.
I like the first statement but I would locate it further inside your profile (a million other guys call themselves a nice guy in their first line and that's just ordinary and you have better sections that prove you're more than just an ordinary guy)
Talking about your assets will probably get you a materialistic woman - if that's what you're after then great! If not.. don't mention owning a condo in your profile.
Overall: Fun, a little qwerky but if that's who you are then that's how it should be.
Indiallias:
I can review it anyway... they whole point is to make it better so you can have better success on here.
Deuce
OE: I decided to review yours mostly because I ignored you were not talking to me... opps.
First of all your message gives me mixed messages that you're in a relationship and a few that make me wonder if I can read.
You are listed as "separated" which I'm sure you are but you might want to just say "not single/not looking" so there is no question.
I've been back on the market for the past 6-8 months
You clearly are not on the market... I assume that you mean since your marriage despite the fact you've left the market again.
I love the dog reference - that was quite funny. Overall your profile does a very good job at showing your personality and explaining some things that might be complicated to understand about it to the reader.
The last paragraph (although I fully understand what you're talking about) probably would make women not want to contact you even if they liked you until that point. Since you are not looking for a date then it shouldn't matter to you but if you were you'd probably want to reword that to be less of a complaint that makes you come off as being overly full of yourself. (Confidence is a fine line)
Overall: A great profile and I'm glad you stuck around to help those fish still in the pond with their profiles
Red:
- Screen name - do you know what the 69 means? I bet you get a lot of sexual comments in relation to your user name. I know it's in relation to your birth year but I would change that to 1969 to avoid the other meaning of that.
Pictures: I like the look of the last one best... put that as your main over the others. That being said is there anything you could do to rotate and crop your photos so there aren't all at an angle? Or get some other photos? You're a pretty woman and my attention is drawn more to the photography than to you.
- I think Daddy's little girl although endearing and nice might give guys the wrong vibes especially when it's attached to your main photo like that.
- Remove the first couple statements about not knowing what to write about yourself. - It's boring and lacks confidence even though you try to pull it back with some humor.
- All qualities you have are good and it's great you have them but they do show a very hard and guarded woman. I have a feeling there is a softer side to you that's not being represented and it should be imho. It sort of pokes through your love of family and your photos but I would like to see more. If that's difficult I suggest you work on allowing that to shine in your life on your own.
- "if not.. you don't know how lucky you could have been.." makes me feel like you have to threaten me to write you. Be confident and tell a man what you want from him. This also works best as a call to action at the end not in the middle of the last paragraph.
- You say you have a great sense of humor - I feel that can come out more in what you say. Likewise to the surprises... you might want to allude to another one. Men love that.
Overall: A very good start, there is some very good stuff to work with but does need a some TLC. with potential for sure. | |
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Posted: 5/6/2008 3:58:03 PM | LOL, what parts make you question whether you can read?!
Remember, it's a friends profile. I was planning on taking the whole first line out, regarding the "back on market" reference but frankly I didn't care as I am here for the forums only now and for the new friend I make along the way. Have fun with this...there is a reason most don't do this sort of thing... | |
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Posted: 5/6/2008 4:29:07 PM | LMAO ok let me get this straight you are 24 and r handing out advive.....? i mean wasn't it only a week ago you were asking for help yrself? DAM WE MUST GIVE GOOD AVICE..........lol.. and yes you will look and comment on mine go hard | |
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Posted: 5/6/2008 5:19:06 PM | lol honest dam if only i could get a guy to make a honest woman out of me ........well i am trying to be honest here girl can wish can't she  | |
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Posted: 5/6/2008 6:34:52 PM | Deuce
I realize you don't care too much... What made me think I didn't read correctly was the statement about getting back into the market. However it is a little confusing to an average reader that's all. According to some people in the forums, "Friends" isn't as black and white as logic might suggest for some reason.
Kiwi
Yup, I'm 24 and I've been online dating for 12 years back in the days of BBSs, modems and IRC. I admit I'm not perfect and it's difficult to have an objective view of your own self so I ask for help and a fresh pair of eyes. I learn from others differing personal experiences to help me shape my own view and grow myself. I see no shame in that or that it makes me any less worthy of giving "advive" to others.
On to the profile...
This is a pretty typical profile of a new person who randomly filled out the section with little thought.
- please cut the excessive smilies. I can see 1 dancing banana or one devil but 12 is a little much.
- I've seen everything in your profile 30,000 times before - you are literally no different than any other woman to the guys that view you. They can then only judge you based on your pictures. I suggest you put some more thought into who you are... what you like... and what you want and then put that in there in a unique way.
- You best picture is #3 and is probably the only one I would keep. The other two are poor quality and probably do not do you justice. You owe it to yourself to find better pictures and put your best foot forward. Grab a friend and have a modeling session if needed - it is allowed to ask for help! :)
- "No mind games" ... does anyone really know what it means when someone says that?
- "say hi if you view me" ... do you want every man that looks at you on the street to say hi to you just because they caught you in their field of view? I don't... and frankly, I wouldn't reply to your profile unless I was into the photos and thought you were hot.
- PLEASE run your profile through spell check. It's your first interaction with a potential mate and right now you look sloppy and unintelligent.
Overall: with a little (for smiley to text ratio) | |
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Posted: 5/6/2008 6:51:59 PM | spudsmakenzie
I assume your actual intent is to scare/intimidate.... and you do to a degree. I have seen scarier... you call yourself a femme fatale and I think you could do a little better... I don't feel drawn into sudden doom just yet.
Overall:
but since that's what you're going for I hope. If that's not what you're going for... please rewrite... completely. | |
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Posted: 5/6/2008 6:53:35 PM | well i did want to scare a little.....but it still seems like im haveing no luck.. or finding guys that shal we say only want one thing?
any help? | |
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Posted: 5/6/2008 9:04:23 PM | | lol dam i am crushed. but will think about yr advice,. dam mind games surley even you know what mind games are shhhhhhesh lol hell yes i am a freindly person i don't mind people saying hello.. well thats the different between you and i you asked for help i never did but i knew you were going to rip into my profile... and i am not haveing trouble so far....lol but thanks for the info..... | |
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Posted: 5/6/2008 9:39:11 PM | spud
You took out femme fatale which will help - it's got a very sexual association to it.
when I read your profile I don't get a clear indication of what you want or are looking for. what's best is to describe what you're looking for in a man and a life with that man in your own personality.
If I were a guy it would read that probably think it was interesting and different but I might not be sure if I wanted to contact you or not because I don't know what you want from your ad or if if I would do that for you. That probably leaves you with the guys that think your hot. (which is ALWAYS the default...)
jynchs
You have a rare profile that actually lets your personality and intelligence through - so that's very well done. Funny, entertaining and a nice read. I feel like I got to know you which is sadly rare.
I seriously question anyone that wants a long term relationship and doesn't define what they are looking for in a partner. I suggest you write that and if you don't know yet then take some time to explore before focusing on something so serious.
Another concern worthy of explaination is:
My free time is usually wasted because I don't have much
How do you see yourself in a relationship working under these conditions? It can be done... not everyone can pull it off... I'd want to know if you've got what it takes to do that.
I'm happy anywhere but here
This does you no favors... I'd think of a better headline it comes off very negitive.
As far as photos go, 4 is a better main photo. I'm not a big fan of your main one since I think your best ones are with smiles. It also doesn't make a good thumbnail as it should be cropped down a bit if you keep it.
Overall: but easily a once you add what you're looking for | |
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Posted: 5/7/2008 4:13:37 AM | Im looking for a good debate, I suppose more than anything. *grin*. (But I swear... .if I read ONE MORE PROFILE, of women looking for a true "nice guy", im going to go ****ing bullistic!!!!) I have to admit, I am curious though. *smile.
I think this sums it up pretty damn well. Good thing im here for a study. :P | |
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Posted: 5/7/2008 6:17:01 AM | | ^^^wow dude, this isn't my thread but curiosity killed the cat and I feel for you. Walking around carrying that much hatred and spite for women must really eat at you. That profile will get you zero friends and it won't do much in the way of promoting your business ventures either if people catch wind of what it is you do. But I'll leave it to the OP. | |
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Posted: 5/7/2008 7:34:37 AM | | well i am only looking for normal/ but if i was looking for guy with a chip on his shoulder yr the frist profile i would look at.loland yes us girls are looking for a nice.bad fun guy.. see we can multi task.We just don't want to end up withsome one who is bitter and resentful...cause he has way to much baggage from the last relationship...... and your right thank god yr here for a study you might learn something?. | |
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