| I had to help wash a dead patient.....
Posted: 5/6/2008 1:02:54 PM | | And now I can't sleep, I feel terrified all th time as I feel like the days are just whizzing by and I can't do anything to stop it. I want to move back to Spain but my parents have set up base here in England now, and they will just say I'm overreacting and not being serious. I have been told to seek help with a grief counsellor, but I have to wait till next week before I get the chance to see them. I want to get out - see the world, do things with my life instead of being stuck at home! Is this a natural reaction?? What would you do in my situation? | |
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| I had to help wash a dead patient.....
Posted: 5/6/2008 1:22:02 PM | Do you think this is a reaction to seeing death first hand, or a 20-yr. old wanting to get out and see the world as opposed to sticking with a job and being a responsible adult?
You are a healthcare assistant. But, apparently this may not be the field for you if this is how you react to a deceased patient. Unless you find a rational way to deal with death, rather than running away from it, I think you need to find a different field.
I think wanting to experience life, after being exposed to death, is a normal reaction, but dropping everything to go do it is another story and a bit irrational. Sounds like you've got some anxiety/stress issues going on. I would forego the grief counselor and just go see your doctor or your shrink before these issues cause you to do something foolish.
Good Luck!
Krys | |
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| I had to help wash a dead patient.....
Posted: 5/6/2008 1:38:12 PM | | When I said I wanted to see the world, that didn't mean I wanted to stop working. On the contrary I was actually looking up teaching English as a foreign language and possibly going on to do that in Madrid or somewhere in Spain. | |
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| I had to help wash a dead patient.....
Posted: 5/6/2008 1:39:13 PM | | I can certainly imagine that as a first encounter with death this would shake a person. Signing up to do something is different from finding out first hand what exactly that means. However, it doesn't sound like you are traumatised -- your mind is hardly on the experience at all but still on the same things it has been since you started posting. Are you quite certain that you are not using this experience to get attention or sympathy or as a potential excuse for quitting work? | |
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| I had to help wash a dead patient.....
Posted: 5/6/2008 1:42:46 PM | | I am not trying to get attention or sympathy I am just unsure of what to do next, so advice really. And yes the death has affected me, the patient died the same day my Nana died 2 years ago, but my way with dealing with things is by pushing them to the back of my mind, which obviously isn't helping as I am not sleeping. When I took on the job I knew it might happen but I was told it very rarely happened and that I was just unlucky to have it in my first week. Most people just walk out afterwards and never return but apparently I showed that I was brave by returning. | |
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| I had to help wash a dead patient.....
Posted: 5/6/2008 4:32:08 PM | I agree with maybe it's time to explore another field of work. Healthcare isn't for everyone. I don't think I would be too crazy about washing a dead patient, that's one of the reasons I don't work in that field.
Better to find out now, than after going through all the schooling etc. Or perhaps you can work somewhere else, like a clinic or something.
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| I had to help wash a dead patient.....
Posted: 5/6/2008 4:44:35 PM | | You are only 20 yrs old. You are still young. The fact that it happened during the 1st wk of your job, I can certainly understand. I'm not so sure grief counseling would help. I think it's more getting used to death. I've experienced the death of others so many times, that I'm comfortable with it. Others haven't had as many experiences as me, and therefore fear it. Although I am comfortable with the death of others... I've never had to wash a body. That would be enough to upset me as well. It just happened this week. Give it time. I think you will be OK in the end. The 1st time is usually the most tramatic. I will be thinking of you. | |
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| I had to help wash a dead patient.....
Posted: 5/6/2008 7:09:00 PM | | i can relate, however i chose to transport for a funeral home where i live, just remember this dead are easier to work with than criminals, they dont fight back. | |
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| I had to help wash a dead patient.....
Posted: 5/6/2008 7:21:00 PM | Op, you are a healthcare assistant and you had to wash a dead body?? Is that not part of your job??? If not, then what is your job discription?? I have been an RN for 27 years, I still wash dead bodies, it is the last mark of respect for my patients..........
I'm sorry, I may seem harsh here, but if you cannot stand the heat or cope with death and dying, get out of health care, you obviously have no passion for taking care of the sick!! | |
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| I had to help wash a dead patient.....
Posted: 5/6/2008 9:41:21 PM | | You did it and that's saying something..And you went back..Your telling us it bothers you and you don't know what to do this is a form of therapy..Your also saying you can't sleep, you have aniexty time is racing by..It seems to me that your experience set something off inside of you and your freaking out alittle..I would see the counseler one that does not suggest medication of any kind..Maybe get some Cest.Seasonings tea tension tamer and sleepytime mix them that will help calm your nerves alittle..Your young and you want to travel will you should don't wait to get old..I saw some death when I was a kid and one time I think I was 23 this fella capped himself off where I worked this condo estate for the rich and famous...I cleaned it up after they took him away it was still very messy but if not me his wife because no one else would do it everyone was freaked out..I find the older I get the less I'd want to do that but we do what we have to do in this life..The thing to remember is that death is part of life it's natural and the feelings your having are natural too if you feel you need to talk to someone do it get help but stay away from the meds most of them will only bring you down and limit your ablity to live your life to the fullest..God Bless. | |
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| I had to help wash a dead patient.....
Posted: 5/7/2008 12:24:25 AM | i believe that upon death, the spirit of the person is not in the body. but i guess at such a young age, you don't think much of death. so let me tell you that if i could project my own death, i would be very grateful to you and i think that the spirit or soul of that person will just beam light all over you and you will feel better. even if my soul did leave my body, let's face it we all have a bit of modesty and ego--so to know that a nice young person who cares was there is maybe even more comforting to those of us who are alive and fear that we will be dead one day, as this person was. as to your current job or what you want to do, it will come. but you will need to put this in perspective and it may be useful to you later on and as you grow up and have to face death more often.
so maybe send a message upwards and wish the soul a good journey and explain that you did a good job and no need to worry about the body left behind. | |
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| I had to help wash a dead patient.....
Posted: 5/7/2008 12:38:50 AM | | It's just a dead guy. My buddies and I used to dig bodies up all the time. He was a street performer and used to have a pretty good ventriloquist act with them. Seriously though - Your paragraph seems savagely disjointed. Dead ppl can't hurt you - What are you scared of? | |
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| I had to help wash a dead patient.....
Posted: 5/7/2008 3:51:57 PM | If you cannot deal with the dead, this is not the job for you. Death is a big part of health care and a natural part of the life process. Patients die, and it's sad, and you may have to handle them. That is just the way that it is. I feel for their families and try to make it as gentle as possible during the process.
I have washed bodies, and always try to make them look as nice as possible when I am finished. It is an honor to attend to the dying and a mark of respect to take care of their needs after death. | |
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| I had to help wash a dead patient.....
Posted: 5/7/2008 4:01:03 PM | Not to hijack this thread... but I got a dumb question to ask... Im currently caring for my elderly (severe dementia) Mother in my home 24/7. My GOAL is to have her here to the VERY END!!! I just ASSUMED the funeral home would pick her up? Now I'm starting to wonder about questions?
Is someone going to have to wash her down? Or will the funeral home just pick her up, and I dont have to worry about this stuff?
I feel like a morbid person for even asking such a question... | |
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| I had to help wash a dead patient.....
Posted: 5/7/2008 6:21:06 PM | Salidan thinks you should -Get over it . We will all be on the slab one day .Even the mighty Salidan .Washing the dead is a job that demands respect and integrity .If you find it hard to be respectful in the presence of the dead without getting freaked then it is not the job for you and there is no reason to beat yourself up about it .
Dealing with the dead always makes one think of our own mortality .
You are a beautiful young women with lots to live for but remember that death is as much part of life as getting up in the morning . | |
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| I had to help wash a dead patient.....
Posted: 5/8/2008 3:30:23 AM | I am not trying to get attention or sympathy I am just unsure of what to do next, so advice really. And yes the death has affected me, the patient died the same day my Nana died 2 years ago, but my way with dealing with things is by pushing them to the back of my mind, which obviously isn't helping as I am not sleeping. When I took on the job I knew it might happen but I was told it very rarely happened and that I was just unlucky to have it in my first week. Most people just walk out afterwards and never return but apparently I showed that I was brave by returning.
Eh, it depends on where you work. I know someone who worked at a nursing home and she had to deal with corpses often enough to scare her away from the nursing profession in general. Some people aren't suited for it. I certainly don't think I would be. | |
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| I had to help wash a dead patient.....
Posted: 5/8/2008 5:12:12 AM | I had to semi wash a person who had released their bodily fluids and died soon after. As I am use to the smell of death I can do the task at hand, but the smell never leaves me no matter how long I shower.
I think death makes us take a more serious view about life. We seem to see life differently after being exposed to dead bodies. In fact anything connected to death makes us think about living.....knowing someone who is going to die for example.
You say you are a health care assistant.....perhaps it may be time for a career change if you are not up to doing the task at hand. | |
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| I had to help wash a dead patient.....
Posted: 5/8/2008 5:20:55 AM | Springazure,
I can only tell you what I've seen in my years in medical offices, not first hand. But I'm guessing at the very end, you'll probably have Hospice involved. At least I hope you do, Hospice is such a wonderful group of people--always--I've never seen an exception. So Hospice will take care of all that for you. If you don't have them involved, you'll have to call 9-1-1 and the paramedics will take care of your Mother, and will probably call the coroner. Only a coroner is allowed to pronounce someone dead, paramedics are not allowed to do that. So expect a drawn out affair of that already sad day. Most deaths that occur at home usually by law (at least here in Michigan) have to also involve the police to make sure there is no foul play. But in the cases of sick elderly, I have seen it where the police do not need to be called. I'm not sure if that is also a job of the coroner or not, but I think it might be. Then I think the coroner will call the funeral home. Either the ambulance or the funeral home will transport her.
Just my .02. | |
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| I had to help wash a dead patient.....
Posted: 5/8/2008 5:51:07 AM | ^^^^^Hospice I don't believe actually work outside of their hospice. A hospice is a place where people live out their dying time.....in other words the patients there are at the point of no return.
I do believe the coroner is the person who makes the arrangements when a person is declared deceased. | |
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| I had to help wash a dead patient.....
Posted: 5/8/2008 5:56:02 AM | Thank you Sim... I guess I just didn't give much thought to what all would be involved, till I read this thread.
Thank you... I feel it is best for people to KNOW what to expect. Surprising unknowns are the last thing a person needs to deal with. | |
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