| Paren-Tales of a Jujubee
Posted: 5/6/2008 3:02:43 PM | How about a place to tell Paren-Tales of which we can almost all speak? They can be human tales, fur baby tales... up to ya'll :) or better yet...any fam-tales you want to tell...let 'em bump!
(Bringing this home)
9:35am
RINGGGG!
(hesitantly...)
Mom?
Hey Babe! Is something wrong? Are you sick? Are you in trouble?
Um well...I may be when I'm through... You know that Cinco De Mayo celebration we went to yesterday...wellllll Mom? Today is our celebration in class. Will you pleaseeeeee make some of Nana's taco stuff? As good as she makes hers?
Trevvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvorrrrrrrrrrrrrr I've been in the office an hour, babe.
I know Mom, but please? Everyone brought something but me. I forgot....
To mention this to me yesterday!?!! A week ago?
I'll do what I can-that's all I can do, okay babe?
Okay...hey Mom? Thank you.
Click.
AGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Haul azz to the store, pickup black beans, taco seasoning, new potatoes, velveeta, rotel, explode through the office like a cyclone...straight to the kitchen.
CHOP CHOP CHOP
DICE DICE DICE
Pour it all in the bowl. Micro time! 3 minutes, stir...3 more minutes.
Perfection!
1pm
Mom! You came! Thank you! Is it as good as Nana's taco stuff?
Without a doubt.
Love you Mom! | |
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| Paren-Tales of a Jujubee
Posted: 5/6/2008 3:16:00 PM | Mommmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm! I didn't think you'd ever be here...
(cutting eyes to look @ the BIG MEAN brother)
Thank God you made it!:)
Sweet huge hugs from little arms wrap around my neck holding me tightly for dear life as he scurries around my neck to my back...peeping out...blue eyed innocence...
Alright, let's have it. Who did what to whom?
He DONATED my puppies, MOMA! (says the pitcher king)
I did NOT! They were on MY game! It's not yours. I have to suffer through your STUPID baseball games & it's MINE! I NEVER complain, I never throw a fit, I ROLLARBLADE during your AAU basketball practice w/o a peep.
He also BOUGHT over a $1000 worth of dog chewie toys for them & spent all of MY MONEY.
Oh yeah?!!! Mom - tell him. I DESERVE to spend all his money.
(Hmmmmm...always wondered how it felt to have someone spend the money I had set aside for something )
Another day in the life. Have I mentioned how much I love them? 
Being a Paren-Tale is not a job for the faint of heart. | |
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| Paren-Tales of a Jujubee
Posted: 5/6/2008 3:16:09 PM | JuJuBee, What a lovely thought for a thread.
One of my most treasured moments was on Serena's thirteenth birthday party when she walked up to me .... put her arms around my waist .... looked up at me with those huge blue eyes .... and said, "Mom, thanks for letting me live. I love my life and I love you." That's my baby girl. She's the best. In that respect ... I've been very * Lucky! * | |
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| Paren-Tales of a Jujubee
Posted: 5/6/2008 3:17:42 PM |  123, that is so sweet! I bet your eyes watered, didn't they?
Heading out to game! Love ya!!! | |
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| Paren-Tales of a Jujubee
Posted: 5/6/2008 3:21:27 PM | | Yep, Cried like a baby. Guess they had talked about abortion in school if I remember correctly. She just wanted me to know how happy she was to be among the living! She's a great kid. 29 now but she's still my BG! Love you too!! Enjoy the game. | |
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| Paren-Tales of a Jujubee
Posted: 5/6/2008 3:24:18 PM |  love it, darlin lol
I'll drop in a couple writes when I've got my kid up here inspiring in my ear. hahaha
Fvck
Just remembered they both have birthdays comin up
Maybe even as soon as next week
sheesus, I better call mommie
the boy's gonna be eight and the girl 12 or thirteen
how much is this gonna cost me?
Kids still dig chuckEcheese hittin puberty?
don't wanna give 'em a suckie memory
I guess I can never go wrong with a picnic at the lake
let them take turns drivin the boat all day
there's a big playground if they wanna swing
or try to climb across the monkey bar thing
the girl came back from her bio dad's last year a vegetarian
and her favorites are bologna, hot dogs and chicken
hahaha yeah, tell me about it
here's your medium rare new york veggie strip
Pandy's got some great ones about her two daughters
I wouldn't tell 'em without askin her permission
besides, she'll tell the story better
best to wait and let her
my boy looks about like harry potter
lol and he's got eyes that allow him to pull much over
"don't try that shyt on me, son
I invented that look"
 hahaha Love ya, darlin | |
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| Paren-Tales of a Jujubee
Posted: 5/6/2008 3:30:47 PM | awww...yay!.....this is gonna be a kewl thread girlie....can't wait to hear about all the adventures of parenthood.....stuff cracks me up (and warms the heart)...
sooo...no babies here.....but I do have nieces and nephews.....and one of my fondest memories is of the oldest (who is 17 now)...when she was 4 she used to sing this song (well...kinda...lol....the only word she really had memorized was "automowobeeeeyal"...and she'd proudly sing it out every time he said it in the song)....and dance her little hiney off.....I can just see her now bobbin' her little head to this tune while ridin down the road in the carseat.....
(Automobile - Chuck Berry)
Riding along in my automobile
My baby beside me at the wheel
I stole a kiss at the turn of a mile
my curiosity running wild
crusin' and playin' the radio
with no particular place to go
Riding along in my automobile
I's anxious to tell her the way I feel
So I told her softly and sincere
and she leaned and whispered in my ear
cuddlin' more and drivin' slow
with no particular place to go
No particular place to go
So we parked way out on ko-ko-mo
The night was young and the moon was gold
So we both decided to take a stroll
Can you image the way I felt
I couldn't unfasten her safety belt
Riding along in my calaboose
Still trying to get her belt a-loose
all the way home I held a grudge
for the safety belt that wouldn't budge
Crusin' and playing the radio
with no particular place to go
No Particular Place To Go | |
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| Paren-Tales of a Jujubee
Posted: 5/6/2008 3:44:33 PM | Huge smile on the ash song! That's cute *have picture of child in car seat pi**ed off because the dang thing wouldn't come undone! How funny.
When Serena was around 10, I was out doing yard work and I wanted her to go inside and put on a pan of water to boil so we could have mac-n-cheese ... well she was taking forever to come back outside so I figured I'd better go check on her.
Poor thing, she's standing at the stove staring at it and crying. I'm confused because I don't understand the crying part ... Serena don't usually cry ya know ... anyway, I ask her why she's crying and she said she couldn't find the boil button on the stove!
I thought I'd wet myself laugh at her. I hated to laugh but OMG! Where's the boil button? Kids, gotta love them. | |
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| Paren-Tales of a Jujubee
Posted: 5/6/2008 9:47:16 PM | So Mom....(said the blue eyed blonde boy) I've been doing alot of thinking about my future (all 6years old & 3ft 8 inches of him).
Lay it on me, babe...what's running through your mind?
Well, yanno...(holy cow! I think he's kin to Brawny), I'm on a reading level 10 right now & I just "have ta be" on a reading level 2 to graduate Kindergarten.
Yes sir, you are & I think it's awesome you are such a voracious reader.
I'm not a hungry reader mom...(so very solemn) but I think I need to stay in school this summer. I don't want to get out for the summer & run wild. Is that okay?
Yeah baby, what do you think we should do about it?
Can you look for me a year round school, Mom? I don't need many breaks. I just want to learn. Okay, I'm done. I love you, Mom. G'night.
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| Paren-Tales of a Jujubee
Posted: 5/7/2008 12:29:07 PM | Like the idea of this thread, and very much enjoying the stories left.
That made me smile about the "boil button", I have a 10 yr old daughter as well who I can see doing the exact same thing! lol I'm the mother of three kids...also have a 13 yr old son , and a five year old daughter. The write I leave below is about my youngest, the nature nut and explorer just like her mom.
Good luck with the thread Jujubee...
Digging for Treasure?
For three days now
I've watched this show
with mud boots upon her feet
to this hill of dirt she does go
with a hoe in hand
out back she makes her way
for hours she would remain
if darkness didnt take light of day
seems sanctuary has been found
a smile adorns her face each and every night
tackle this hill she does
puts forth all her might
perhaps she dreams of treasure
that beneath this hill it shall be found
I sit to watch her passionate efforts
praying silently she'll unearth something within this ground.... | |
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| Paren-Tales of a Jujubee
Posted: 5/7/2008 12:53:30 PM | ...that's too cute Wabbit.....the mental picture makes me giggle.....determined little chick.....trudging up the hill...bless her little heart....I hope she finds somethin' too!
and bless Serena's heart too.....for wantin to find that "boil" button so badly!...lol | |
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| Paren-Tales of a Jujubee
Posted: 5/7/2008 1:05:39 PM | So far she's found
a couple big rocks
that she did show
with a sweet little glow
yet she keeps searching
if she finds the treasure
I'll let you all know!
Keep thinking about Jujubee's son who wants to go to school year round, ummm who wants to go school year round?
Sounds like you've got yourself a scholar
one who wants a good job
where he can earn top dollar
encourage I say
learning paves the way
a high achiever should be commended
just make sure he remembers that in life there should also be play.
Wabbit | |
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| Paren-Tales of a Jujubee
Posted: 5/7/2008 1:27:55 PM | my momma just sent me this in an email (just so ya know..she didn't write it..didn't wanna go givin' someone else's words as my mom's)....titled "I LOVE YOU" in big capital letters....had to share it with you ladies.....
Before I was a Mom
I never tripped over toys or forgot words to a lullaby.
I didn't worry whether or not my plants were poisonous.
I never thought about immunizations.
Before I was a Mom -
I had never been puked on.
Pooped on.
Chewed on.
Peed on.
I had complete control of my mind and my thoughts.
I slept all night.
Before I was a Mom
I never held down a screaming child so doctors could do tests.
Or give shots.
I never looked into teary eyes and cried.
I never got gloriously happy over a simple grin.
I never sat up late hours at night watching a baby sleep.
Before I was a Mom
I never held a sleeping baby just because I didn't want to put him down.
I never felt my heart break into a million pieces when I couldn't stop the hurt.
I never knew that something so small could affect my life so much.
I never knew that I could love someone so much.
I never knew I would love being a Mom.
Before I was a Mom -
I didn't know the feeling of having my heart outside my body.
I didn't know how special it could feel to feed a hungry baby.
I didn't know that bond between a mother and her child.
I didn't know that something so small could make me feel so important and happy.
Before I was a Mom -
I had never gotten up in the middle of the night every 10 minutes to make sure all was okay.
I had never known the warmth, the joy, the love, the heartache,
the wonderment or the satisfaction of being a Mom.
I didn't know I was capable of feeling so much, before I was a Mom. | |
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| Paren-Tales of a Jujubee
Posted: 5/7/2008 1:44:25 PM | Kids' Thoughts on Marriage
HOW DO YOU DECIDE WHO TO MARRY?
You got to find somebody who likes the same stuff. Like, if you like sports, she should like it that you like sports, and she should keep the
chips and dip coming.
--Alan, age 10
No person really decides before they grow up who they're going to marry. God decides it all way before, and you get to find out later who you're stuck with.
--Kirsten, age 10
WHAT IS THE RIGHT AGE TO GET MARRIED?
Twenty-three is the best age because you know the person FOREVER by then.
--Camille, age 10
No age is good to get married at. You got to be a fool to get married.
--Freddie, age 6
HOW CAN A STRANGER TELL IF TWO PEOPLE ARE MARRIED?
You might have to guess, based on whether they seem to be yelling at the same kids.
--Derrick, age 8
WHAT DO YOU THINK YOUR MOM AND DAD HAVE IN COMMON?
Both don't want any more kids.
--Lori, age 8
WHAT DO MOST PEOPLE DO ON A DATE?
Dates are for having fun, and people should use them to get to know each
other. Even boys have something to say if you listen long enough.
--Lynnette, age 8
On the first date, they just tell each other lies, and that usually gets
them interested enough to go for a second date.
--Martin, age 10
WHAT WOULD YOU DO ON A FIRST DATE THAT WAS TURNING SOUR?
I'd run home and play dead. The next day I would call all the newspapers
and make sure they wrote about me in all the dead columns.
--Craig, age 9
WHEN IS IT OKAY TO KISS SOMEONE?
When they're rich.
--Pam, age 7
The law says you have to be eighteen, so I wouldn't want to mess with that.
--Curt, age 7
The rule goes like this: If you kiss someone, then you should marry them
and have kids with them. It's the right thing to do.
--Howard, age 8
IS IT BETTER TO BE SINGLE OR MARRIED?
I don't know which is better, but I'll tell you one thing. I'm never going
to have sex with my wife. I don't want to be all grossed out.
--Theodore, age 8
It's better for girls to be single but not for boys. Boys need someone to clean up after them.
--Anita, age 9
HOW WOULD THE WORLD BE DIFFERENT IF PEOPLE DIDN'T GET MARRIED?
There sure would be a lot of kids to explain, wouldn't there?
--Kelvin, age 8
"And the #1 Favorite is........"
HOW WOULD YOU MAKE A MARRIAGE WORK?
Tell your wife that she looks pretty even if she looks like a truck.
--Ricky, age 10 | |
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| Paren-Tales of a Jujubee
Posted: 5/7/2008 1:45:33 PM |
Keep thinking about Jujubee's son who wants to go to school year round, ummm who wants to go school year round?
No doubt, darlin
sure wasn't like that when we were kids
droolin for the bell to ring marking summer vacation
and a week later we drove our moms nuts from our boredom
lol
yanno it's true
all of you do
and the first day back to school
you were prolly late too
I always was
just because
it was dang near across the street
if I'd have ridden the bus Iwouldn't have been tardy
mom shoving me out the door before her first coffee
my scoobie doo lunch box packed to it's limits
with an extra sammich and twinkie in it
this is why I don't give my kid's mom more shyt
I don't have the tolerance that come's with tits
"ya got two minutes to have your ass.es to the door
don't make me scream at you both anymore
we're leaving at exactly 7:30
or both of your ass.es belong to my teeth"
 snarl
edit: Hey genegem! we're ladies now.. after all this time we're no longer whores!
woohoo! | |
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| Paren-Tales of a Jujubee
Posted: 5/7/2008 2:35:39 PM | Hey Wab, Ash, Geneg, Brawn! Remember back in the days when we were growing up? Everything was soooo much more fun-no electronics. :)
When the boys were little, we lived in the country. My ankles paid for every gopher & Cole & Trev hole to be found.
There was a small innocent looking puddle place in the front yard that was constantly getting new heaps of dirt in it. It started out with the little tiny gardner's hoe until they could carry the bigger "man tools" of the trade. As the rains came down, the puddle would evolve into a fullsized sink hole. Cole told Trev never to get in it when it was that deep or he'd go straight to China. Trev was terrified of it.
The rains came down. The puddle took on a life of it's own once again.
They dug from one hole to the next, scooped, carried, depostited dirt one pile after another.
Never one to choose his battles wisely, Cole got mad @ Trev & told him (in his 6 yr old @ the time wisdom), you put it in the wrong place, TREVOR.
Trev let another scoop fall & turned to walk away. Cole said HEY. I know you hear me.
WHAM, just enough mud to hold in a four yr old hand...upside Cole's head. He let him know there was more where that came from. Needless to say, hoes & shovels went to the wayside, glops & ganoodles of mud flew through the air @ mach nine.
Somehow, 4yr old Trev got 6 yr old Cole, flipped him, & landed him in the mud then started screaming bloody hell.
MOM!!!!!! MOM!!!!!!! I'm sending Cole to CHINA!!!!!
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| Paren-Tales of a Jujubee
Posted: 5/7/2008 2:43:42 PM | bahahaha
I don't know how you parents keep from laughin' in the midst of disciplining and such.....and yes, the good ole' days....mud pies....and dirt bikes...trails cut in the woods to ride on....trees to go hide and smoke cigarettes in....haha....that was later in the years....and only because I caught my older brother smokin' and he told me he'd give me one if I didn't tell....
"Twenty-three is the best age because you know the person FOREVER by then."
oh...to be a kid again.... | |
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| Paren-Tales of a Jujubee
Posted: 5/7/2008 3:14:56 PM | Loved the story about the mud, don't you all still play with that stuff? Come on now, we can still be kids to.
It is hard to stop from grinning when our kids do these things we know are bad, but it's funny at the same time. Heck, I can't keep the grin off my face all the time.
Thought I would leave this one here, kind of shows you where my little one gets her adventerous spirit from.
Found Treasure
I drift to a place in time
a young child am I
an explorer alongside my brother
there was nothing we wouldn't try
many a summer down railroad tracks
we would wander each day
slide down a steep hill
to a flowing creek we would go to play
trees in all their glory
would be our fortress away from home
through these forbidden areas
together we would roam
one day with bright sunshine upon our heads
upon this hill as we slid down
a red velvet box of jewels
we so elatedly found
I'll never forget that moment
seems a treasure we did find
gold rings and necklaces were dazzling
still I can see them in my mind
we would be rich we cried
run home we did to show our dad
soon of our good fortune
news of handing them in to police caused us to be sad
never did we think of them being stolen
yet assured we were of this being true
not letting this disappointment stop us
off we were exploring an adventure new
these times I now sweetly remember
many more of them I could tell
to remember my brother and I as children
causes my heart to swell
for they are times that warm me
never to be brought back again
yet of youthful adventures
I assure you for me they do not end. | |
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| Paren-Tales of a Jujubee
Posted: 5/7/2008 3:26:18 PM | Back from Deployment
"Hi, is Mason awake?"
'Yes, Hi, he's right here, you want to talk to him?'
"Yeah, please"
'ok, Mason your Dad's on the phone!, how are you?'
"Good, and yourself?"
'I'm good, here he is'
Hi Dad (I can hear him panting, and coming down from fighting with his brother)
"Hey Bud, whattaya doing? Having a good night?"
Yeah Dad, just playin with Danny
" Are you going to be awake for awhile, or are you going to bed soon?"
I don't know "ask your mom"
Mom, am I goin to bed soon
'no, you can stay up and talk'
(he starts making fart sounds into the phone)
"Oh, Yeah, what if I show up at your house, and squeeze ya"
(this goes on for a while, back and forth)
(I'm coming around a corner couple blocks from the house in the rental car, about 930pm)
(pull in ''they're" driveway, get out and start walking up the stairs)
(knock, knock) (the door opens)
Mason look who's here,
(he's still talkin on the phone to me)
Step in the house, and that little five and a half year old boy jumped up six feet into my arms, for fifteen minutes of hugs and kiss's, wonderin just what the hell he was gonna do now that I was here.
steppin on my foot,(its game we play to see who's faster). coming back for another hug, and kiss. | |
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| Paren-Tales of a Jujubee
Posted: 5/7/2008 3:35:15 PM | Awwww Wab....that baby gets it from moma, huh? Best way to go of it?
You made my eyes water, E2S. Bet there was nothing finer than that, was there? | |
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| Paren-Tales of a Jujubee
Posted: 5/7/2008 4:35:59 PM | | dang...eyes....got the ladies cryin round here (myself included)....cept for that big hairy lady named BD....bet she ain't cryin'....hee..hee...she's kinda a tuff one....(proly due to the hormonal differences) | |
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| Paren-Tales of a Jujubee
Posted: 5/7/2008 4:58:52 PM | all guys drink out of the faucet
the milk jug too when mother ain't lookin
I was gonna write somethin
but now the dogs are barkin'
hold on while I grab the shotgun
thank god, it wasn't the old lady droppin off the kids
how many hits of window pane did I just drop again?
my twelve year old looks like she's twenty two
what's a dad to do?
I just figured I'd grow my hair long
and carry my bat arround
I don't care how big they is
them boy's will all be frightened
when I step out
of the pick up truck
with my bat and my freak flag flyin
she'll prolly have to move to a different state
before she gets invited on a date
I'll knock his dad out of the ball park too
just for giving life to you
yeah, I actually carry a louisville slugger
it's much more intimidating than a gun
when I step outta the truck and have choked up
you better step away from my daughter
moo | |
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| Paren-Tales of a Jujubee
Posted: 5/7/2008 5:03:39 PM | Who sings that song
so you like my daughter do you boy? yeah, we think she's something else....
somewhere it says i'll be cleanin' my gun
Ever seen the movie Waterboy w/ Adam Sandler & Kathy Bates? She tells him the wisest thing ANY moma of boys worth her salt knows...
Bobbie Bucheiux...girls are THE DEVIL. EVIL.
Now if they'd just take heed. | |
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| Paren-Tales of a Jujubee
Posted: 5/8/2008 8:45:26 PM | Moma! Game tonight-don't forget! i'm so proud of my brother being a star!
awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww
bottom of the 6th,he's caught all game
his number one fan is in the dugout handing him his powerade, rubbing his back...glowing to be near him...you sure are catching good tonight, Trev.
mom, can i get him a treat because he is catching so awesome?!
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| Paren-Tales of a Jujubee
Posted: 5/8/2008 10:34:30 PM | well...it has finally happened
yanno mom,(cripes-another brawny kid runnin' around)
this embarrassing me has gotta stop. 
how'd i do that?!!!
you were just....ugh...anyway. don't yell @ me when i'm playing if i'm giving him a target to pitch to...and how come you always wear green & black? can i buy you a different color for Mothers' Day & can I shop without you this time?
I AM almost 11 now.
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