| What's Your Cure for a Broken Heart?
Posted: 5/9/2008 1:15:25 PM | I have been a single parent for 12 years now raising my three little Howard troupers and one share baby. I was pregnant, unemployed and taking three tough college courses at the time the tornado that ripped through my life and my childrens lives hit.
Ever since then I have attempted to find kindness and love and someone to be a partner to help carry this package I never intended to carry on my own. I got lucky once and found a best friend - no real chemistry, but we communicated well. This did not work either as the two men in my life fought constantly until both were gone. This is where my share baby came from - the best blessing from this relationship and now in school full time showing mommy and daddy what she is made out of :o)
I read this book long ago by T.H.White, "The Once & Future King" regarding stories about King Arthur. In it, the magician and wise man, Merlin tells wart (arthur's nick name as a lad) that the best thing for being sad is to learn something....
"That is the only thing that never fails. You may grow old and tremble in your anatomies, you may lie awake at night and listen to the disorder of your veins, you may miss your only love, you may see the world about you devastated by EVIL lunatics, or know your honor trampled in the sewers of baser minds... There is only one thing for it then - TO LEARN. Learn why the world wags and what wags it. That is the only thing which the mind can never exhaust, never alienate, never be tortured by, never fear or distrust, and never dream of regretting." ...
Learning is a solution to my life's frustrations. My ex-boyfriends was a new harley. What is yours? I would love to hear them and how it helps you over come the sadness of another hope at love dying.
For those bible buffs out there - loves broken hearts is sung as true poetry in Songs 8:6 - 7. I so agree that love is as strong as death. | |
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| What's Your Cure for a Broken Heart?
Posted: 5/9/2008 1:26:03 PM | My cure to get over the man I had been with for 22 years, and 4 kids later, was to drink for the next 7 years. Jesus' first miracle was to bring forth more wine at a wedding, so he MUST have known what a cure-all alcohol is for sadness.
After realizing no one was going to help me raise 4 kids, I ran for city council to **** to the whole city about why we have Family Court buildings when no one in Orange County enforced Child Support Judgments.
I don't know how to cure a broken heart, but just like skiing when I broke my leg in 3 places, it was much stronger than the other leg after it had been broken. Hope you can use a strong heart to get through all the myriad of stuff you have or are going through. | |
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| What's Your Cure for a Broken Heart?
Posted: 5/9/2008 1:30:23 PM | the best cure for a broken heart is your true friends, they'll always be there for you, member guys come and go a friend is there forever.........................................
i know this sounds cheesy butt its the truth. | |
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| There is no such thing as a broken heart, only a closed one.
Posted: 5/9/2008 1:59:52 PM | There is no such thing as a broken heart, only a closed one. When people are hurt in love they often close their hearts up to love as a means of protecting themselves, this will stop the flow of love within you and will painfully delay the healing. Let the love flow through you.
If your having trouble doing this I would suggest trying some heart chakra meditations.
Good luck buddy | |
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| What's Your Cure for a Broken Heart?
Posted: 5/9/2008 7:34:20 PM | | Well, I was just "cut loose" tonight by someone whom I only knew for a week but was thinking could ultimately be the one I was looking for. So what I do to recover from the shock is to have some alone time- no music, no TV, no distractions- , kind of a retreat in a way, and I reassure myself that while she did not see the good in me, the next one may....and the right one will. That takes away some of the hurt. For long relationships, a break is definitely in order. But no material item will help. | |
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| What's Your Cure for a Broken Heart?
Posted: 5/9/2008 10:02:50 PM | Odd to come across such a question at this point in my life but fate is a strange lady is she not. As I am presently nursing my broken not closed heart back to health it would seem fitting that I can answer this while I am still living it. I write. I write here to be exact. I answer the pleas of those like you that wish to know more of who is out there. In answering your questions and offering my opinions and advise I do a little soul searching at the same time. It helps me clarify what I feel what I think and were I need to go. I can after all take my own advise even when I know I don't want to. So here I am scattering pieces of me across the pages of this forum for all to see, for me to see. To know yourself can be difficult at times especially when your not sure if you'll like what you find. So I write and I think and sometimes I cry but not so often anymore. I reread what I have written and see if the man that wrote it is still the man I want to be. Life goes on, the sun rises, the tears dry, the birds sing and it is still good to be alive. I heal by trying to heal others. I ease my pain by easing the pain of others. I may not know them and they may not know me but ever little bit of pain taken away from the world makes it just a little bit better. Better for them better for you and better for me. I don't like pain for me or anyone. I just want to make it all go away for everyone forever. This is my solution. My salvation. This eases my pain and hopefully someone else's as well. Heres more of me then I should probably share but I will to answer your question.
DK | |
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| What's Your Cure for a Broken Heart?
Posted: 5/10/2008 11:53:35 AM | Altho I agree with the beer, beer, and more beer concept. That only works for alittle while. Been there and done that. In my opinion the first step is to learn to love yourself, take this time and focus the energy on finding you. There isn't going to be a quick fix, just time and learning. The one thing that has really been a huge help for me was to fill the "extra time" with activities that keep my mind, body, and spirit busy. Before I knew it I was so busy I forgot that there was at one time a broken heart. Another thing is to forgive, and be sure not to place all the blame on yourself.
Maybe I'm way out in left field, or maybe I'm out in the parking lot. None the less thats all I got to say about that. LOL | |
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| What's Your Cure for a Broken Heart?
Posted: 5/10/2008 3:32:11 PM | Time is the only cure. We all want a magic potion to take away the hurt..but it does not exist. Furthermore..no one can tell you how LONG it will take..for each of us the time factor is different.
There is a clearly defined process though,, the stages of recovery if you will, with time spent in each section varying..and sometimes we slip back..and have to repeat the last one we were in..but eventually, it all works out.
They are:
1. shock/denial/ numbness
2. fear/anger/depression
3.understanding/acceptance/moving on
You just learn to get through life until one day you wake up and realize that you haven't thought about that person for two, or three days...once that happens, you are on the way to recovery. | |
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| What's Your Cure for a Broken Heart?
Posted: 5/10/2008 4:04:07 PM | [Well, I was just "cut loose" tonight by someone whom I only knew for a week but was thinking could ultimately be the one I was looking for. So what I do to recover from the shock is to have some alone time- no music, no TV, no distractions- , kind of a retreat in a way, and I reassure myself that while she did not see the good in me, the next one may....and the right one will. ]
wow ReadyorNot...thank you for disclosing how you feel. I too only knew someone for about a week last week and just 'felt' this thing for him unlike any other...and got cut loose (he didn't feel the 'physical chemistry' aka..I am not attractive enough as my picture 30lbs ago albeit a head shot...I guess you could say I give great head(shot)LOL
seriously. ..even though...i was so giddy over him and felt that he most likely wouldn't be attractive to him that when we first started chatting online a month ago i actually admitted my weight (what heavy-set woman does that!!) and he made me feel secure enough to meet him). We had glorious chats...eerily couldn't talk enough on the phone and went AGAINST my own desires about not really meeting anyone (not feeling ready) because of the connection I felt after talking for hours and hours on the phone for 4 nights.
Shock is exactly what I felt and still feel ...its been 4 days....and I am glad that I am not a loon for feeling it (at least one other person out there does at least).
sorry for all who feel a lil broken today and there are some really nice responses on this thread...obviously there are some real people of depth out in the world and even the joksters offer up a positive way to look at things lol. Thank you | |
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| What's Your Cure for a Broken Heart?
Posted: 5/11/2008 5:04:33 PM | Belle you are beautiful!
Yes Time is the Only Cure & there is lots of it for me. Hugs I needed that.
ElizabethNotLiz
I am your sister as I have already been down your road.
To you I pass along the golden key (via email)
Just remember the only thing valuable is what is in the soul. | |
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| What's Your Cure for a Broken Heart?
Posted: 5/11/2008 6:24:16 PM | | Go back to school and study something that interest you. Write short stories, write poems, write music. Get the pain out of you into another "platform" of exquisiteness and delite. Take SAM-E, 400 ml. a day. | |
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| What's Your Cure for a Broken Heart?
Posted: 5/12/2008 2:40:38 AM | Booze, booze and more booze. LOL, well that is only a temporary solution.
I think the best thing to do is try and date someone else. You may forget the person that's causing you hurting and enjoy the new person quite quick. If you don't do that you'll just wallow in your own misery. Been there, done that, its no fun. | |
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| What's Your Cure for a Broken Heart?
Posted: 5/12/2008 10:27:59 AM | | I read your statment and i wish i could feel that way. now i am so hurt and devastaed i do not know where to turn. I have wasted the last 2 years of my life following the dreams he set in front of me. I believed his every word. I came to florida after i lost the love of my life we were together for 20 years. Now i find my self a single mother with 2 teenagers and i can't find a job. This is not how life was to be. I have been out there looking for a job everywhere but no one is hiring and if they are they want that hot looking girl not a 52 year old mom. My memory fads from time to time so going back to school at this point is not an option. I have been a nanny for many years in nj but here it seems no one needs a sitter. Is there anything you can say to lift my Broken heart. | |
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| What's Your Cure for a Broken Heart?
Posted: 5/12/2008 11:46:39 AM | the first cure for a broken heart is to listen the song 'broken heart' written and perfomed by the american rock band White Lion (it will make you feel better, ready to start again)
then the next step is to meet/bed new women (if you are a man of course) (it will make you forget for a while the bloody person who broke your heart) | |
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| What's Your Cure for a Broken Heart?
Posted: 5/12/2008 10:08:12 PM | think of the relaity of it. would being with this person been exactly what you dreampt?? or would there be a lot of Sh!t involved???
focus on her downsides youll feel better
then as above. BED NEW WOMEN | |
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| What's Your Cure for a Broken Heart?
Posted: 5/14/2008 10:10:29 AM | | LOL guys you are funny - no worries no matter how much you think it makes you guys look bad to say "Bed New Women" it is honest. Women fall in love this way too, dont let us kid you :o) | |
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| What's Your Cure for a Broken Heart?
Posted: 5/14/2008 10:44:53 AM | | I agree that time is the most important thing. Jumping into someone else's arms may feel ok initially, but if you haven't moved on, you are just in for more problems. When your heart is broken, I would recommend doing anything that can keep that other person off your mind. Whether its a hobby or work, do anything but analyze and try and figure out what went wrong. There is a time for learning, but the initial stage really isn't the most appropriate in my opinion. You need a clear head to see what you can do better next time and you can only get that after a sufficient amount of time has passed. That will vary of course from person to person. | |
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| What's Your Cure for a Broken Heart?
Posted: 5/17/2008 8:04:53 PM | Pedro...Are you serious? If you really cared for someone deeply and they let you go, you honestly think that "bed a new women" would be the answer? Grow up! Yea, this is the cure....Write back to me in 20 yrs from now.... | |
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| What's Your Cure for a Broken Heart?
Posted: 5/17/2008 8:49:02 PM | | Broken heart is a figure of speech. The heart does not break. People get sad when they end relationships, or fall out of love or whatever it is that happens. From whatever day the bad news comes, you can choose to leave that behind and start something better. Or you can wallow in tragedy having poignant emotions. It's a free country. | |
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