| am i right, is she a whore
Posted: 5/9/2008 10:51:40 PM | Ok since I got back from Iraq I've been talking to this girl who is really good friends with my best friend, it started out good but when I left to go to oklahoma She admitted that she almost had sex with some other guy, even though we werent officially bf and gf I think it was wrong because I passed up alot of sex while I was home for the simple fact that I thought it was disrespectful to her since I wanted to have a relationship with her.
then when I got back we went to this party, she got really drunk and made out with a 14 year old ( I know pretty weird a 14 year old was there) I didnt know about this til the next day when SHE told me about it, Then my last night there before I came back to my home I'll admit I was being a jerk to her a little bit but it was my way of dealing with how she hurt me and didnt even give a damn that she did.
well anyway my lastnight there she slept in my friends BROTHERS bed with him, didnt even hang out with me. At this point I had enough I didnt even tell her bye the next morning before my drive back.
She didnt contact me til the next day when she texted me telling me she found out I called her a whore, I said " well what am I supposed to think, you almost have sex with tony, then you make out with a 14 year old and sleep in marks room". then she replied with " If I was a whore I wouldve slept with all three of them and I havent"
I still think she is wrong for all this since she acts like weve been dating for a long time but yet were not officially bf and gf.
what are your thoughts on this? | |
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| am i right, is she a whore
Posted: 5/9/2008 11:00:40 PM | She's not a whore. She is (according to what she has said) not having sex with these other guys, and she's not getting paid for the sex she's (not) having. So, no, she's not a whore.
A tease and a good-time girl with loose personal boundaries? That, she may be.
Listen, just forget your whole thing with this girl, okay? It doesn't matter if she's a whore or a tease or a lost little girl in search of someone who's going to take responsibility for keeping her in line. Your values and hers obviously are nowhere near the same.
Don't try to understand it, don't try to figure out a way to fix it. Just get away from the whole thing and find someone whose actions you understand and agree with. | |
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~Kyn~
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Joined: 2/15/2008
Msg: 3 | |
| am i right, is she a whore
Posted: 5/9/2008 11:00:47 PM | lol...are we going by the strict definition of whore? or just using it liberally?
Look...she's an idiot by any definition...and rather than being a jerk to her you shoulda just told her to f*ck off.
Sure she was well within her "right" to "do" as many guys as she wants since you havent discussed anything...however you "were" working on something and to me thats worthy of keeping your hands to yourself and your legs together.
People who do this pretty much arent worth your time and will continue to mess around with your heart, move from person to person and cause nothing but anxiety and pain to other people while they go "What? I didnt do nothing and owe you nothing as well"
^^^IF it was a guy...women would label him Player...but she's a gal so its Whore *lol*
Either way..they bring those labels on themselves even if they arent strictly defined.
They arent a prize to be won and you're not the winner when they finally settle down cos you were the Man to do it. Unless you consider it a booby prize.
They're d!ckheads and life is all about them and always will be till they learn to give a damn about other people (their impact on them) and living up to their title of being the Gold Medal they ultimately think they are. | |
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| am i right, is she a whore
Posted: 5/9/2008 11:02:14 PM | Lucky ass 14yr old....
OP, She's probably a slut. She's not a whore, you need to pay for those. If she had any inkling of respect for you she wouldn't have done that. Either that or she really does believe her behavior is fine, which is another red flag. | |
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| am i right, is she a whore
Posted: 5/9/2008 11:06:43 PM | Ohhhh the drama.... I am so glad I'm not 19 anymore...
You are not exclusive... she can do whatever she wants with any guy she wants. If you don't think that should be allowed communicate and set the ground rules of whatever you have going on.
If you were being a jerk I wouldn't hang out with you either.. life is too short.
Was she wrong? No...
Lack judgement? Probably..
Was a whore? No (no money was exchanged ... and she's not even a slut)
Are you wrong? No...
To fix this.. you need to talk about where you guys are at... if you'll be with other people or trying to make things work. Or just find a new girl... unfortunately a lot of this goes with the age. | |
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| am i right, is she a whore
Posted: 5/9/2008 11:06:55 PM | At 19, you are chasing what someone that is still in high school?
Then you state you were a bit of a jerk... Probably more than a bit if your really think about it... After all it is always easier to minimize what we have done to another person.
So you call her names, then what?
Perhaps you need to look up whore. Yep, you could have gone out and got laid all over the place, at the same time you state you two weren't officially dating, so why didn;t you? Almost having sex is NOT having sex. Thus she isn't a whore, cause she hasn't had sex for money.
You're 19, haven't you experienced enough drama already? This is crazy, get out and have a good time, enjoy yourself. Why set yourself up with drama from someone that is still a baby herself?
She's trying to find herself, and so are you. If you feel the need to call someone a name like whore, then perhaps it is better to move on, because relationships don't get easier from that point forward. | |
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| am i right, is she a whore
Posted: 5/9/2008 11:07:56 PM | I think you all gave good advice, it sucks though because when I'm not an ***hole and she's not a **** we work well together, it's like we'll be fighting then it's like the argument makes us closer it's so weird, I was talking to this other girl before this one showed interest in me and I gave that up for her, I always choose the wrong one lol, everyone even told me to stick with the first one but I didnt do it I went for the easy way into a temporary relationship.
k when I said whore I mean like a slutty person not necessarily someone who gets paid for sex. and the thing is she heard from a female friend of mine that I was talking to alot of girls, she was joking, but it got taken seriously and she got all pissed off then she tells me what almost happened and that she didnt want it to ruin things between us because she wants to date me. | |
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~Kyn~
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Joined: 2/15/2008
Msg: 8 | |
| am i right, is she a whore
Posted: 5/9/2008 11:10:02 PM |
it sucks though because when I'm not an ***hole and she's not a **** we work well together
Dont kid yourself hon...you dont work well together.
Working well together doesnt involve other people.
You get involved further with her...everytime there's an issue...she'll run off to some other guy. | |
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| am i right, is she a whore
Posted: 5/9/2008 11:13:03 PM |
even though we werent officially bf and gf I think it was wrong because I passed up alot of sex while I was home for the simple fact that I thought it was disrespectful to her since I wanted to have a relationship with her.
I can't believe no one else noticed this.
You weren't/aren't her boyfriend. She can do as she pleases. Just because YOU want to have a relationship with HER doesn't make it any of your business who she makes out with. Or sleeps with. Or ALMOST sleeps with. Or anything.
So she's not a whore. | |
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| am i right, is she a whore
Posted: 5/9/2008 11:13:24 PM | I think you're very young and VERY immature.
-You passed up on how much sex....? Because you were thinking you wanted a relationship with her?
-You have to communicate what you want to get what you want!
-You're VERY wrong to call this girl a whore- Maybe you need to look up the definition of a whore!
-You're 19... how old is she? The girl that made out with a 14 year old... (she didn't sleep with him... she made out) How does that make her a whore?
OOOH yeah... she's sooo wrong it's all her fault! I mean she needs to learn how to READ minds! | |
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| am i right, is she a whore
Posted: 5/9/2008 11:15:13 PM | Well heres the thing I hung out with her one weekend, didnt know she was interested in me, next weekend after that she told me she wanted me to be her boyfriend but I told her I dont want to rush into anything, so she tries to start the relationship with me but then Im the one putting way more into it
and let me clear this up too shes not a high schooler shes 3 months younger than me. | |
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| am i right, is she a whore
Posted: 5/9/2008 11:18:13 PM | First of all, she made out with a kid, she's a COUGAR.
Second, DUDE...why are you chasing skirts on a dating site if you're so worried about some girl who's too dizzy to know who's she's kissing and who's bed she's in.
OK, maybe she didn't have sex with your friend's brother. Maybe your friend's brother had sex with her while she was asleep.
Dude...the second you touch her she'll claim she's pregnant, and you will find out 9 months later that the baby isn't yours. She is stringing you along to take the fall when it happens. Sluts are smart this way...keep one guy on tap who actually has a good job/career going to fall upon when all else fails.
You are the fall guy. Get it? Now dump her. Why on Earth would you want to keep a women you're fighting with all the time anyhow?
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~Kyn~
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Joined: 2/15/2008
Msg: 13 | |
| am i right, is she a whore
Posted: 5/9/2008 11:18:48 PM | I can't believe no one else noticed this.
You weren't/aren't her boyfriend. She can do as she pleases. Just because YOU want to have a relationship with HER doesn't make it any of your business who she makes out with. Or sleeps with. Or ALMOST sleeps with. Or anything.
So she's not a whore
*I* DID pick it up...go back and read my post Msg #3.
Frankly...if a woman knows a man is interested in him and deliberately wants to still f*ck around with his emotions by messing around with other guys...she's a dumbass any way you wanna justify the behavior.
But then...she's got with a 14 yr old so shows she's a complete moron.
Kick her OP. | |
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| am i right, is she a whore
Posted: 5/9/2008 11:22:02 PM |
Well heres the thing
>> I hung out with her one weekend, didnt know she was interested in me,
>>next weekend after that she told me she wanted me to be her boyfriend but
>>I told her I dont want to rush into anything, so
>>she tries to start the relationship with me but then
>>Im the one putting way more into it
Let's break this down...
1. She expresses interest in YOU.
2. YOU tell her you don't want to rush things.
3. She starts talking and / or fooling around with other guys
4. You get angry at that.
You cannot get angry at her for talking or being with other guys, when YOU told her you don't want to rush things.
It doesn't work that way. | |
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| am i right, is she a whore
Posted: 5/9/2008 11:24:55 PM | You're both immature, which is not surprising at the ages you are at. two 19 yr olds, that is just baby ages.
However the name calling thing, yeah that doesn't make for good things in the future.
You guys get closer after each fight. That is because you guys are trying to figure out where your bondaries are. Instead of communicating you two seem to like to egg the person on into some sort of jealous behavior, then it is kiss and make up time.
As much fun as that seems now, the novelty is going to wear off real fast. Hopefully you two will learn how to be nicer to the next person that comes along...
If you are going to get all crazy when the two of you aren't officially dating, then why on earth say you aren't dating. That is an oxymoron.
Ohhhh brother, now someone wants to really stir the pot... Why does it happen all the time that someone has to go above and beyond what is even there. Not everyone goes out and gets pregnant just to pin it on someone else... SHEESH | |
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stacj
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Joined: 6/27/2007
Msg: 16 | |
| am i right, is she a whore
Posted: 5/9/2008 11:26:45 PM |
it was wrong because I passed up alot of sex while I was home
So you were almost a whore! Just because you want something doesn’t mean someone else wants the same.
Everyone else has already pointed out everything else. You should have the point by now so I will pass on that but I will say you should never call someone a whore. Maybe she will read this post and see what you think of her. | |
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~Kyn~
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Joined: 2/15/2008
Msg: 17 | |
| am i right, is she a whore
Posted: 5/9/2008 11:28:37 PM |
Let's break this down...
1. She expresses interest in YOU.
2. YOU tell her you don't want to rush things.
3. She starts talking and / or fooling around with other guys
4. You get angry at that.
You cannot get angry at her for talking or being with other guys, when YOU told her you don't want to rush things.
It doesn't work that way
Ok Ok...I completely recant AND change my stance after reading Nicky's post...he's absolutely right...
...However...I still wouldnt get involved with someone so flippant, free sexually and stupid enough to go with a 14 yr old..
*damn vodkas...Im missin stuff*  *hates that*
*drowns her sorrows* ...*thinks about going out and pickin up a man* lol
Dammit...the OP was about me! | |
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| am i right, is she a whore
Posted: 5/9/2008 11:33:37 PM |
Ok Ok...I completely recant AND change my stance after reading Nicky's post...he's absolutely right...
...like that's a new thing? 
...However...I still wouldnt get involved with someone so flippant, free sexually and stupid enough to go with a 14 yr old..
Agreed.
They are both young and making mistakes. Every single one of us has been there. OP, there's a lot of mistakes in this...some are hers, some are yours.
Regardless of any of it, no need to call her a "whore". At 19 it's not an easy thing to do, but don't let your emotions (Anger included) get the best of you. | |
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| am i right, is she a whore
Posted: 5/9/2008 11:33:54 PM | | I think you all bring up some good points, I wish I could type the whole story behind me and her then you guys would understand alot more Im not good at wordingthings so I dont think I got my point across very well but from what I have said I think you guys are right, I did say I wanted to take it slow but it didnt go that way we spent like every minute together really got to know eachother, I even took flowers to her dead father without telling her about it, her friend found out and told her, I thought she would think I was weird or something for it but she thought it was sweet, i dont know I kind awish I wouldnt have brought this up on a forum, I even apologized for calling her a whore yesterday, I was just angry | |
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~Kyn~
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Joined: 2/15/2008
Msg: 20 | |
| am i right, is she a whore
Posted: 5/9/2008 11:36:20 PM | ...like that's a new thing?
...However...I still wouldnt get involved with someone so flippant, free sexually and stupid enough to go with a 14 yr old..
Agreed.
*whacks Nicky with her ManBat*...shaddup...Im vulnerable right now. 
i dont know I kind awish I wouldnt have brought this up on a forum, I even apologized for calling her a whore yesterday, I was just angry
Its okay OP...*hugs him*...sometimes shit happens | |
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| am i right, is she a whore
Posted: 5/9/2008 11:44:25 PM | | Wackmc... how the hell is she a cougar? She's 18 or 19... because the op is only 19 and she's 3 mos younger. She's a teenager | |
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| am i right, is she a whore
Posted: 5/9/2008 11:49:13 PM | | when I was a young teenager I would go to my older sisters parties and their friends would make out with me it's not that unusual | |
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| am i right, is she a whore
Posted: 5/9/2008 11:50:29 PM | | you are very young and have just gotten back from a hellhole and must have seen many disturbing things. you just need to find someone a bit more mature. i don't know what you would call this girl nowadays. i'd say for sure she is immature at least. whereas you've been forced to deal with mature issues, such as war and potential post traumatic triggers. you deserve someone who will be able to talk to you and enter into something of a higher level. be glad you are not "official". i think someone better "suited" is waiting for you. i hope you get to have a little more of a lighter life, given what you have witnessed. i think you are needing a romantic girl right now, if i read you correctly. go for it! mtv is an illusion. | |
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~Kyn~
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Joined: 2/15/2008
Msg: 24 | |
| am i right, is she a whore
Posted: 5/9/2008 11:57:57 PM | when I was a young teenager I would go to my older sisters parties and their friends would make out with me it's not that unusual
oh umm...YEAH it fricken IS !!
Last time I made out with a 14 yr old was when I was...well never. And Im certainly no prude.
OMG some of you people are sooooo used to tolerating and being accustomed to just disgraceful behavior you think its bloody normal.
Learn some boundaries on your behavior, how other people treat you and how you raise your children. Geez
*flabbergasted*
Dont set your personal bar to "Bullshit"..aim a little higher in what you receive as well as give. | |
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| am i right, is she a whore
Posted: 5/10/2008 12:00:41 AM | | I'm not saying I would make out with a 14 year old lol but when girls get drunk they loosen up alot lol | |
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