| Profile Review PLEASE be gentle
Posted: 5/12/2008 11:46:30 AM | Be gentle. :-)
http://www.plentyoffish.com/member7035426.htm
I'm looking for friends + more eventually, and want nice kind gentle people and low-key type settings. If I come across really badly or strangely I'd like to know. If there are ways to state things that are different than I have used, it might be helpful.
I hope I've blathered enough to make the 200 word count, I don't see how you can have that much when a profile review intro-thread would really only be a url.
Thank you ever so much.
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| Profile Review PLEASE be gentle
Posted: 5/12/2008 12:10:09 PM | Foxylady I did enjoy reading your profile and can see that you have a way with words.
It is a good profile, well put together and gives the reader a sense of who you are and what you like to do.
I see that you are separated and seeking long term. *Dating* might be the better choice for you and who knows somewhere along the way it just might turn into a long term relationship.
All the best to you. | |
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| Profile Review PLEASE be gentle
Posted: 5/12/2008 12:12:26 PM | Thanks. I think you're right. It's hard really to know. I mean, I wnat more than friends and in two months or less my divorce will be final, so in the betweentime what does one call one's self?
lol
Thanks for having a look. | |
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| Profile Review PLEASE be gentle
Posted: 5/12/2008 12:13:25 PM | 200 character count. 200 words would be a bit too much, yes.
You do have that two different themes going. On one hand, your writing shows a funny, spirited woman, someone with a bit of a wild streak and an edge. On the other hand, it is sentimental and a big sappy, and your pictures tend to be of someone who is a bit on the introverted, quiet side (as you also say in OP).
Overall, both sides are good. The funny side, with photo captions, with "chocolate and ice cream oriented", with first date jokes is appealing in its own way. The sentimental side, with a story of a young girl is appealing in another way. They are just difficult to reconcile in same profile.
Edit: Separation issue... Dating is better, and even that might be too much. Friends might be a place to start if you see a lot of people having issues with dating while not divorced. But, definitely not LTR. | |
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| Profile Review PLEASE be gentle
Posted: 5/12/2008 12:17:28 PM | Just a kind suggestion and that is somewhere in your profile mention that you will be divorced in two months.
I say this cause a lot of people tend to steer clear of separated people(both men and women).
That will say that there is no going back and you are free to date. | |
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| Profile Review PLEASE be gentle
Posted: 5/12/2008 2:16:16 PM | Hi foxy lady, I read your profile and know absolutely nothing about your personality,with the exception that you have a sense of humor. I also have no idea if YOU might like ME. Those are the two most critical things that need to happen if you want to maximize your chances of success. Select at least two words that describe you,then work them into your profile in a creative way. Then do the same thing for the man that you are seeking.
Examples of some words NOT to use,( these are what I call "assumed givens" EVERYONE wants them,therefore these would not express your uniqueness.
honest,funny,sincere,loyal,trustworthy,caring,kind,romantic,etc.
Use words like these" adventurous,passionate,introvert/extrovert,layed back,aggressive,intense,outgoing,meek,etc.
best wishes
OFCB | |
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| Profile Review PLEASE be gentle
Posted: 5/12/2008 7:05:48 PM | Hey all. Thanks I did a bit of reworking with your suggestions. If you have time and interest, please feel free to comment. I appreciate the input that you have already given as well!
As far as knowing I kinda figured by a person's interests (that listing for interests) you could tell, IE someone who likes beer making isn't a non-drinker. But I added a Q and A kinda deal that might help too.
http://www.plentyoffish.com/member7035426.htm | |
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| Profile Review PLEASE be gentle
Posted: 5/12/2008 9:46:22 PM | Hmmmmmmmm,still didn't see any words that describe you or the man you are looking for.
best wishes
OFCB | |
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| Profile Review PLEASE be gentle
Posted: 5/13/2008 10:09:52 AM | Right here OFCB
Unless I'm just not understanding what you meant, does this not tell you what I am like and who I am looking for in character traits? To me I'd rather show than tell, how exactly does one work in obvious things they are looking for (or not?)
Thanks again!
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FYI: I'm about 8 weeks from being legally divorced. While this is a sad thing it is also a happy time. One must move forward and so I am.
How I like to treat a man:
Little gifts like a backrub after a long day, a cold beverage when he's mowing the lawn or working hard (or coffee), space when he needs it to be alone, little messages (whatever e-format) to say I care and I'm thinking of you.
How I like to be treated by a man:
Hold the door (It's classy!!), answer e-messages as applicable to say you care, pay my way (within reason) on dates, be honest about where things are at in the relationship.
How I like a man to treat the world:
Be kind and caring, pick up your own messes (whether at home, work or in life itself), make your own way, help those you love and even those you don't know (to some degree). | |
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| Profile Review PLEASE be gentle
Posted: 5/13/2008 6:49:27 PM | Hi foxy, apparently I did not express myself very well. Yes, you do have some words that are descriptive of what you want HIM to be,but if I am looking at the right words,they are what I call "assumed givens"They DO NOT make someone unique.Refer back to my last post,I am pretty sure I gave you some examples of words that were UNIQUE traites. However I still do not see YOUR UNIQUE personality characteristics,also they need to be at the begining of your profile,not the end.Many will click off BEFORE they learn WHO you are. The words that I see that I think you are refering to are: kind, caring.? Or am I missing something?
I will check back for your answers to my questions.
best wishes
OFCB | |
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| Profile Review PLEASE be gentle
Posted: 5/14/2008 10:34:24 AM | I see. . .kinda. I'm going to give a good deal of thought to what everyone has said, meanwhile I put my profile 'on ice'. Cause yeah I want my unique me, plus what I'm looking for, to come through in a way that's not pages and pages long. I'll let you know when I come up with a new concoction. Maybe I'm just not simplifying enough in the right areas.
Thanks again. :-) | |
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| Profile Review PLEASE be gentle
Posted: 5/14/2008 11:26:08 AM | I swear I took a crack at this profile before but I don’t see it here but so I’ll put my two cents in anyway.
I remember reading your profile OP mainly because of your first date section and your pictures, although the first one was a good memory and the second a bad memory. Your pictures are mainly either too distant or your eyes are closed, otherwise they’d be great pictures! The only problem I see here and I’m sorry to be the jerk to say it but you look much older at first glance in your pictures. There are a few of you around these forums I notice this in. It might just be the way you photograph or maybe the pictures you decided to include but I’d consider trying to add some photos of things that are age appropriate for you. I know, what the hell does age appropriate mean, but as an example I wouldn’t post a picture of me playing lawn bowling if I was graying and I dressed older. It’s all about perception and at first glance this is what I see.
What I don’t remember is the wall of interests! That is WAY too many! You need to chop that in half, and then go ahead and do it again for a good times sake. Cleaning clutter is fun… trust Deuce! I’ve always said that if any person wanted to they could put 200 interests down on paper. I could ramble for hours I’m sure of things I enjoy and make up some goofy ones along the way. We need to see about 10-20 of the most important interests in your life. These are things you like to do or read about or participate in.
The first paragraph of your About Me might not come out the way you intend it to, so I’d consider either revising it or deleting it altogether. I’d definitely consider deleting the second one though! LOL You do a pretty good job of describing yourself but you fail to describe who you are shopping for. Do that. The guy should read your profile and say “wow… this is the girl I’ve been searching for!” and then he should read a little further and jump off the couch screaming “YES! I’M THE MAN SHE’S BEEN LOOKING FOR!” and want to call all his buddies and tell him the good news. Okay, that last bit might be a tad premature but you catch my drift I think.
Your first date section is one of the best I’ve seen to date here. It’s not excessively original by any standards but it’s different and unique and not just run of the mill. But I’d take that first line about your divorce and bump it to the last line of your About Me section. Good luck! | |
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| Profile Review PLEASE be gentle
Posted: 5/14/2008 11:35:51 AM | I'm 32. I AM old. In person I look younger. Well, not sure what can be done about that. lol I'll review the rest of your comments and take another crack.
THANKS! | |
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| Profile Review PLEASE be gentle
Posted: 5/14/2008 11:37:35 AM | I updated just this afternoon so the other comments may not apply but the directly above me posters' may. Quoting what's wrong a bit sometimes helps too IE this sentence starts "is too long" or whatever.
Did I Get It This Time? (Profile Review)
Posted: 5/14/2008 10 27 AM
I got some great tips and I was just slumping around doing some housework when an inspiration struck. Maybe it's a bit much but maybe not. Anyway here is my revised one, so I hope it has better luck.
http://www.plentyoffish.com/member7035426.htm
Please be gentle, but honest if the two can be a compatible thing. lol
Thanks ever so much again. The people who answer these forums are really kind and really know their stuff. It helps a LOT. | |
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| Profile Review PLEASE be gentle
Posted: 5/14/2008 11:44:06 AM | | 32 isn't old!!! And judging from your laundry list of interests and your pictures you love to get out and have a good time and explore. You are full of life. So why not show that. If you like kayaking or rock climbing get some pictures doing that. A picture of you dressed up perhaps at an event? You are either in a business suit or you are in vacation grub, which is rarely attractive. We go on holidays to relax and get away from having to look pretty so we don't care much. I'm 28... do I look old?! LOL There's looking old and there's being perceived as being old. Your pictures depict an older woman, which you are not. | |
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| Profile Review PLEASE be gentle
Posted: 5/14/2008 11:48:18 AM | | OP, just in case you need to hear it from someone else, I agree with everything Deuce said in this thread. You're *not* old -- not physically, anyway; mentally, maybe you're 60? Is that the problem? But Deuce is right, get some shots of you doing those fun things and you'll see that you look great and attractive. | |
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| Profile Review PLEASE be gentle
Posted: 5/14/2008 11:56:29 AM | OP is not old and her personality is not old. But, her photos make her look like she is.
Sorry, foxylady, but if I saw you in real life, I would give you over 32. And the pic of you at 28, I would give you over 28. Nothing much you can do about it - you look the way you look. About the only thing I can suggest is to see if you can take professional studio photos that make you look younger. Normally they are a form of cheating because they are effectively made to lie about your age or your looks. In your case, I think they are justifiable. | |
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| Profile Review PLEASE be gentle
Posted: 5/14/2008 11:57:23 AM | Thanks I don't feel old. I guess the trouble is most of the action shots I had were with the ex. . .and he has all the pics now. It's been almost a year since we were together, but nobody took more action shots when I did stuff the last year.
I'll try to make sure at different events people don't keep taking static 'pose' pictures of me. It's kinda hard, with action shots, to take them yourself and I live alone (the dog is no help at all) LOL Maybe I should invite a friend over and have a photo shoot day? LOL
I am after all only 32 and not a single wrinkle.
UPDATES - As of this post I've done nothing else. I may leave interests as long because I am truly and actively into everything on that list on a current basis and it makes for a better search by interest but the rest of the comments, especially photo ones will be taken under advisement.
I'll repost once I've done more tweaking.
Last question: Am I to get for action pics that you mean if I like reading a pic of me reading, me with my collections of whatever, me doing even if it's a bit staged?? I photograph badly in the best of times. lol I could show you me on a boat with my hair totally screwed up, me almost falling INTO the ocean, me being dragged across the lawn by my dog but you don't mean that either do you? | |
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| Profile Review PLEASE be gentle
Posted: 5/14/2008 11:58:33 AM | | Oh Yevgeny - at 28 I was I'D' by police for looking 18 in relation to casino gambling (nothing illegal lol) so it's not me in real life it's me in pictures. Just FYI | |
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| Profile Review PLEASE be gentle
Posted: 5/14/2008 12:01:29 PM | OP is not old and her personality is not old. But, her photos make her look like she is. Did not mean to imply that she was, but I see now that I did. Sorry about that.
I had a friend who, when she was 19, was mistaken for a 40 year old woman; she just had those sorts of features. I'm sure that now (at 40) she wouldn't look much different than she did then. Someone I know (not a friend) is physically about 32, but looks 50 because his mindset is that of a 60 year-old. (Or maybe an 80 year old - very crotchety, always complaining, always says his health is bad.) It was him I was thinking of when I made my first post, so sorry if it came across poorly.
Yev and Deuce both have good suggestions; if amateur pictures are not flattering, go get a professional to do it. Me, I'll just sit over here and try not to swallow my ankle. | |
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| Profile Review PLEASE be gentle
Posted: 5/14/2008 1:49:28 PM |
I see. . .kinda. I'm going to give a good deal of thought to what everyone has said, meanwhile I put my profile 'on ice'. Cause yeah I want my unique me, plus what I'm looking for, to come through in a way that's not pages and pages long. I'll let you know when I come up with a new concoction. Maybe I'm just not simplifying enough in the right areas.
Thanks again. :-)
Hi foxy, I would like to invite you to go look at my profile. Maybe it will help me to better explain what I am trying to say. If you do, you will see that I state my UNIQUE personality traits in the first paragraph. Then in the last paragraph, I state my UNIQUE personality traites that I prefer in a woman. Maybe it would help you to put some perspective on what I am trying to say?
Best wishes
OFCB | |
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| Profile Review PLEASE be gentle
Posted: 5/14/2008 2:02:39 PM | HEY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I see INTROVERT !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THATS ONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  We are now making progress! Good for you. With that long list of interests,I know there has got to be more to you than that. Okay, that was the good part. Now for the bad part. I saw Deuce say the second paragraph had to go. I didn't know what he meant. UNTILL I read your profile. Trust us Foxy, with that second paragraph, it is going to make very little difference HOW good the rest of your profile is. They WILL be GONE! You really need to remove that ASAP.
Best wishes
OFCB | |
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| Profile Review PLEASE be gentle
Posted: 5/14/2008 7:02:20 PM | OK Second paragraph gone gone gone!
Now I really need help with my pics, folkses!!!!
Action shots? Any suggestions?
OF the pictures posted, WHICH (if any) would be ok to leave? Can you pick me out ONE good pic to leave till I can update the other ones.
??
Thank you sooooooooooooooooo much.
And yeah, I'm young at heart. ;-)  | |
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| Profile Review PLEASE be gentle
Posted: 5/14/2008 7:12:10 PM | ADDENDUM:
I (swear to God) have a pic of me holding a MIG Assault rifle in someone's kitchen pretending to be a commando. Would that be appropriate for this site?
As I said, some of my action shots had others I couldn't crop out. But I love the idea of making more! | |
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| Profile Review PLEASE be gentle
Posted: 5/14/2008 7:27:37 PM | Hi Foxy, I am rather sure firearms are not against the rules, your profile never made me think. She has guns! But I guess it couldn't hurt to try it, if you wan to.
pic 1 don't care for
pic 2 too far away
pic 3 good but too far away ( is cropping possible)
pic 4 main
pic 5 too far
pic 6 bad pic
pic 7 too far
pic 8 bad pic
Best wishes
OFCB | |
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