| homophobic someone define this for me
Posted: 5/16/2008 7:52:03 AM | | in reading another thread i proudly stated that im not homophobic ...but in thinking im not sure so in the interest of not being hypocritical im asking what homophobic means to others ....do i put down homosexuals ?? No.... do i hate one because of his sexual persuasion??no.... do i discriminate against homosexuals??no... do i feel they have all the rights i do and that they have the right to live like they want???yes ...am i repulsed by the thought of another of the same sex touching me in a sexual way ??? yea..... do i associate with people i know to be homosexual ???No .... would i shun them on a non sexual basis ??no.. am i homophobic ???..??? | |
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| homophobic someone define this for me
Posted: 5/16/2008 7:54:11 AM | | short answer would be no. You're quite far from being a homophobe in my opinion... go look at the "lesbian lovers" thread and you'll see a true homophobe who was posting in there. | |
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| homophobic someone define this for me
Posted: 5/16/2008 7:59:26 AM | yea that was one of the threads that started me thinking ....but what made me wonder is that if i was around a known homosexual i could not be comfortable wondering if i could be the object of sexual thoughts by him....would i show it ????NO but i might still feel like i was homophobic
guess i dont understand what a troll post ...pitty means... but its all good | |
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| homophobic someone define this for me
Posted: 5/16/2008 8:23:45 AM | I'd say you were borderline. Phobe means fear as well as hate. Not comfortable implies worry. You only worry about something you fear, even if only on some small level.
Take another person to whom you are not sexually attracted, say an 85 year old Grandma. Would you worry about her possible having fantasies about you? Probably not. So it's different w/ somebody who you know has a different orientation than yourself.
So in the true sense of the word, yes.
In the popular sense, used to connote hate....nope, sounds like you're OK there. | |
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| homophobic someone define this for me
Posted: 5/16/2008 8:30:00 AM | deerdog, I agree with everything you said. I found out as an adult that my oldest friend in the world was gay (known him since I was 5). So the only difference between your ideas and mine is that I DO associate with known gay folks. Now, if my oldest friend in the world hadn't been gay, I might not but since he was, I was already comfortable with him. So I started going to events where he was there with some of his other gay friends and found out that it really wasn't any big deal. Not one of them has ever hit on me because they know I'm straight but they have given me some really good suggestions on fashion. I know that sounds stereotypical, but it's true dammit. So now I have lots of gay friends and to be honest, they're a blast to hang out with.
I would definitely say you're not homophobic. I think it's a question of exposure. You probably just haven't really been exposed to it but I have a feeling if you were, that uncomfortable feeling would disappear. | |
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| homophobic someone define this for me
Posted: 5/16/2008 8:49:19 AM | | Borderline because you would not associate with a known homosexual. I'm not sure why that would be a problem for you. It's like saying you wouldn't associate with a woman you find ugly because she might have sexual thoughts about you. It's not real logical. However, I won't completly knock you over it. I think what's happening here is that logically you know better but instinctually you have the "eeww" factor. | |
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| homophobic someone define this for me
Posted: 5/16/2008 9:05:47 AM | | Technically speaking, homophobic is from two Greek words, homos (self or same) and phobia (fear). The politically-correct use, which is really a mis-use & proof that they don't know what they are saying, it means fear of the self (or same gender). For a man to be homophobic it means that he either is afraid of himself or of other men. For a woman (though that is Lesbian from the antics of the legendary Sappho on the island of Lesbos) it would be fear of other women. The modern P.C. mis-use of the term is based upon the assumption that hatred or any opposition at all is synonmous to fear. That simply indicates that these persons have not thought things through. Hatred & opposition doen NOT equal fear. Fear is opposition without a sense of being able to do anything about the object of that fear. Hatred, on the other hand, is akin to abuse & has a very real sense of not only being able to do something about the object of hatred, but is determined to do so. In short, Homophobia as properly understood simply means a fear of the self or same. | |
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| homophobic someone define this for me
Posted: 5/16/2008 9:18:45 AM | Depends on how "politically correct" the name caller is. Make one statement they don't like about homosexuality and you are branded! Personally, I myself am not interested in homosexuality at all...I like women. Only women. Therefore I could well be considered a "homophobe" by some PC jerks. Do I care of someone else is gay? No...their business not mine. Do they "deserve" the same rights as opposite sex couples? Sure...as long as they accept the same responsibilities too! Does it have any affect on the workplace? No...they do their job, I do mine. (Had to throw that in there...some gay fired that line out on an interview with me...asking if being gay would be an issue in the workplace. I asked what that had to do with the ability to perform the job...none, therefore the whole issue was a moot point at best and not worth my consideration.)
Don't worry about it too much...if some guy hits on you, don't respond with a fist to the face...just a polite "No thanks, I'm not that way...but do you have a sister?" will suffice.
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| homophobic someone define this for me
Posted: 5/16/2008 10:16:47 AM | | yea dont get me wrong i would associate on another level with a known homosexual ...say professional or yes i could consider myself friends with one ..just not on a social front ..but if i worked with one i would have no problem with him ...i just think their sexual orentation would perclude me having other common interest ...anyway i had always considered my not being homophobic because i have no malice toward them but in realizing the actual meaning of the word it occured to me that i would not be completely comfortable around a homosexual | |
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| homophobic someone define this for me
Posted: 5/16/2008 10:28:40 AM | | Being uncomfortable about being the desire of a homosexual mans advances or desires towards you would not make you a homophobic - since that is NOT your sexual orientation! Now if someone would perpetuate / instigate hatred or malice against a homosexual - then yup - homophobic! | |
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| homophobic someone define this for me
Posted: 5/16/2008 11:42:29 AM | Dude, the fact that you refer to people as "homosexual" tells me that you're a homophobe. Get over it!
Why do you even care about the preferences and lifestyles of others. It's none of your damn business. A
Anyone uncomfortable with gay people is obviously uncomfortable with himself or herself. | |
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| homophobic someone define this for me
Posted: 5/16/2008 2:54:39 PM | I hear you saying you are uncomfortable, especially :
"am i repulsed by the thought of another of the same sex touching me in a sexual way ??? yea."
All I can say is that personally I'm repulsed, lol, on a case-by-case basis. So the same as I would be attracted or not-attracted to *anyone* for dating purposes based on the individual, guy or girl; I would be repulsed or not repulsed at the idea of someone touching me sexually, case-by-case, guy or girl.
If you automatically *won't* date outside your race, no matter or not if the person fits all of your other criteria; then you are a racist, yes? If you are automatically *repulsed* at the idea of someone of the same sex touching you sensually, are you a homophobe?
I'm not really an authority on it, but I guess my gut-reaction answer would also be "yes" | |
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| homophobic someone define this for me
Posted: 5/16/2008 3:00:07 PM | I think you just need more education about the matter....If you only know how many people were having erotic thoughts about you, not just gay guys, you might be surprised. Afterall your pic is on the net, so it is someones fantasy now.
Ok i dont understand how using the term homosexuals implies homophobia...Is it only ok to use it as an adjective? I understand the dif between the terms sexual preference and sexual orientation, but this i dont get. | |
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| homophobic someone define this for me
Posted: 5/16/2008 3:15:31 PM | Ok i dont understand how using the term homosexuals implies homophobia...Is it only ok to use it as an adjective? I understand the dif between the terms sexual preference and sexual orientation, but this i dont get.
If someone referred to you as a heterosexual, wouldn't it strike you as a bit insulting? | |
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| homophobic someone define this for me
Posted: 5/16/2008 3:23:12 PM | deerdog
I have no idea if your homopic,,
I have guy friends, they like to do the same things as you and I,, Gay men and woman don't walk around feeling my ass,, because they are gay,, they respect I'm straight,, and I respect they are guy,, no big deal,, mater of fact,, you wouldn't know they were gay unless they told you.. Then again if you ever went to P town in the Cape,, that would be a whole new experience,,
My ex brother in law is big time homopic,,, he is disgusted with the idea,, if he had it his was,, he would do what Hitler did,, I find that sad,,
anyway I just found out his son said he was gay,, 24yrs old,, his father disowned him,,
View it this way,, what two people do in the bed room should not be your concern,, just treat gay men and woman as the people they are,, you can't catch anything,, | |
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| homophobic someone define this for me
Posted: 5/16/2008 3:56:11 PM | | I never have liked the term "homophobic" as it implies a fear of gays. Another answer noted that phobia means fear or hatred. In some cases, people fit the definition but I continually tire when I hear that label put on anyone that says anything that can possibly be construed as anti gay. It is common to be labelled homophobic if one expresses a desire not to want to be around gay people and I would call this being homo averse rather than phobic. I do not hate or fear gays but do not particularly want to spend my time hanging out wiht them but that doesn't make me homophobic. | |
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| homophobic someone define this for me
Posted: 5/16/2008 3:58:02 PM | | If you don't associate with them purely because of there sexuality, I would say that you're prejudice against them... but not that you're necessarily afraid of them. | |
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| homophobic someone define this for me
Posted: 5/16/2008 4:39:08 PM | | 63 Blues, No honestly it wouldnt bother me, I am heterosexual so why would I care that someone called me that. While I generally believe labels are a negative item in our society, we have to have some terms to clairfy who and what we are. | |
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| homophobic someone define this for me
Posted: 5/16/2008 4:41:01 PM | | Why would someone be insulted by being referred to as "heterosexual" !? I don't get pissed when people call me Caucasian, and I'm that too.... | |
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| homophobic someone define this for me
Posted: 5/16/2008 4:42:36 PM | | I hate to upset anyone, but the very fact that a person asks the question essentially about how they should feel if they are touched up or eyed up or just chatted to by a gay or lesbian person respectively, suggests that as they are not also condemning straight people for doing the same to them but focusing on a gay person, that they feel been approached by someone of the same sex is bad in some way. Well get over it I say to anyone like that. at the end of the day it is NO different to been approached by the opposite sex if you are straight, your only criteria for how you respond should be on the basis on whether you like them. Men if you wouldnt punch a woman you didnt fancy for flirting at you then you cant justify doing so to a gay man. etc. That is the essence of how you define any 'ism like racisim etc. If you behave differently to someone because they are the 'wrong colour' or wrong sexuality or disabled or whatever then you have a problem. | |
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| homophobic someone define this for me
Posted: 5/16/2008 4:43:41 PM | | Doesn't bother me if someone calls me heterosexual, bisexual, ect... any more than it bothers me to be called white or caucasian. It's just another descriptor. | |
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| homophobic someone define this for me
Posted: 5/16/2008 4:48:16 PM | I find that anyone who is bothered (insulted, freaked out whatever) by someone of another sexual persuasion usually has SOME prejudice.
Myself I could not care less. Feel free to contact me whatever preferences you have. People are people. Considering the state of the world today shouldn't we all just be happy that someone is reaching out and making contact? | |
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| homophobic someone define this for me
Posted: 5/17/2008 12:00:22 AM | The proper term for homosexual is gay.
If yer gay..you can refer to yourself as a faggot in good fun.
The proper term for heterosexuals is breeder. | |
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| homophobic someone define this for me
Posted: 5/17/2008 12:24:29 AM | | Homophobic to me seems to be so uncomfortable with the thought of homosexuality that you react inappropriately to it, such in ways of anger or prejudice, insults etc... | |
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