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ladismile79

Joined: 11/10/2008

Msg: 23 (view)

How can I talk to her Posted: 4/7/2009 2:36:20 PM
You just walk up to her slowly. Look her straight in the eye. And say – I like eggs. Then walk away. Works every time. LOL THAT MIGHT ACTUALLY WORK

ladismile79

Joined: 11/10/2008

Msg: 129 (view)

Sensitive issues Posted: 2/2/2009 5:10:44 PM
For all the people being outright mean OK people, really? They both chose to have sex on the first date! That was a personal choice from both of them! Even though I don't do that, as long as they both agreed, who's to say it was wrong? If he truly thought he liked her, then THEY had sex, and afterwards shared a discussion, that is just something that happened! The fact that she opened up to him does not obligate him to date her, or to feel like scum. He did not say he was not going to date her due to her past. He has stated that he was trying to make it as painless as possible to tell her something that might hurt her because of her past. He was trying to not be cruel. Saying he didn't want to date her either way is just a reality. If everyone that ever had a one night stand was required to date that person, I think it would be quite interesting, don't you? Sleeping with this woman does not obligate this man to date her. This woman confiding her personal past to this man does not obligate him to date this woman! The fact that the OP does not feel any kind connection toward this woman for a LTR doesn't make him a bad person. Although I will probably get crucified for this: IF SHE HAD NEVER REVEALED TO HIM A PAST THAT HAD MOLESTATION, WOULD ALL OF YOU BE SOOOOOOO HARD ON THIS GUY? ARE YOU NOT IN EFFECT MAKING HER MORE OF A "VICTIM" THAN HE IS? It would then just be a case of......oh, he had a one night stand, and he doesn't see any relationship in the future, so he is doing the right thing by telling her, and walking away.

ladismile79

Joined: 11/10/2008

Msg: 179 (view)

The habits your ex had that make you glad its over. Posted: 1/23/2009 6:31:46 AM
My ex was always on video games. He drank alot, and never cleaned up after himself. I think one of the happiest things for me (not having him around) is not having to work all day, then come home to a man who is again unemployed and playing video games, and clean up his Budweiser bottles, and JD bottles from all over the house! He can't tell me how worthless I am any more. He can't cheat on me anymore. lol I think I'll stop now, cause the list would be long if I thought about it much! lol

ladismile79

Joined: 11/10/2008

Msg: 18 (view)

Would you give back an engagement ring if the relationship fails? Posted: 1/23/2009 6:27:17 AM
LOL If he wouldn't have lost his job, therefore making me pay for my own engagement ring, yeah I would have given it back! Since I ended up paying for it, I kept it! lol I wasn't going to leave him a ring to pawn, when I'm the one who paid for it.

ladismile79

Joined: 11/10/2008

Msg: 1224 (view)

Cheating- can you forgive? Posted: 11/29/2008 10:28:22 PM
My ex cheated, then said never again. We tried but he wouldn't be faithful. I agree with the first response you got: NONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONO NONONONONONONONONONONONONONON Just know that if you try, and it doesn't work, then you must face the consequences for your choice.

ladismile79

Joined: 11/10/2008

Msg: 675 (view)

What did YOU do wrong in your last relationship? Posted: 11/29/2008 10:13:43 PM
I allowed a lot of things I never should have. I didn't leave when it first started getting bad. I trusted the wrong person. I thought I could "help" him with his problems.

ladismile79

Joined: 11/10/2008

Msg: 106 (view)

Talking to your exes... Posted: 11/25/2008 12:06:19 AM
I completely agree with you OP. Every time I stayed in contact, I always went back as well. Just set myself up to go through the same things again. I don't think your crazy. Every person has to know what they can and can't take. There is nothing wrong with either decision, just depends on you!

ladismile79

Joined: 11/10/2008

Msg: 9 (view)

A First For Me... Posted: 11/24/2008 9:37:41 PM
Just relax and let things develop. I agree with those who said she does have a wall. Thing is, she might realize she has one, but it is a defense mechanism so she doesn't enter dangerous territory again. Just let things move at their own pace, and be there for her, get to know her. Enjoy the time you share together and sooner or later, that wall will dissipate. Be patient, and if it's meant to be, it will! Good luck, and I wish you both happiness.

ladismile79

Joined: 11/10/2008

Msg: 476 (view)

for the ladies....can you TRULY say money ain't a factor? Posted: 11/22/2008 10:18:10 PM
As long as a man has a job, the amount of money does not matter. I don't care if you make min. wage, as long as you work.

ladismile79

Joined: 11/10/2008

Msg: 61 (view)

Why do women think..... Posted: 11/22/2008 10:14:56 PM
There are just as many shallow women as there are shallow men. The same goes for men and women who have the ability to feel and love deeply. This is very well said. I believe men and women both fall deeply in love and stay there. It just depends on the individual. My mom and dad love one another very deeply, they just show it in their own unique ways. Whomever said that men can't fall deeply in love, as women can, just didn't know any man of the right kind apparently. IMO

ladismile79

Joined: 11/10/2008

Msg: 1 (view)

Would you? Posted: 11/22/2008 1:01:00 AM
While reading Forums the other day, I came across one man's answer in which he said he would date a woman with facial hair as long as she kept it shaved. That just got me wondering if men would date women with facial hair, or if that man were unique in his point of view. So, just out of curiosity, would you date a woman with facial hair?

ladismile79

Joined: 11/10/2008

Msg: 1 (view)

Is romance the little things, things that cost, or a mood you set? Posted: 11/19/2008 12:20:35 AM
If you are trying to be romantic with someone, what would you do? I know that men and women have different opinions and definitions on many things, just looking for a man's opinion of romantic? Does romance constitute the little things, or is it the things that cost money, or is it a mood you set? Just curious. I'm new on here, so if this is a common thread, I haven't seen it, and I apologize.

ladismile79

Joined: 11/10/2008

Msg: 104 (view)

How many of you have been tested for STDs? Posted: 11/18/2008 11:41:49 PM
I get tested on a reg. 6 mo basis. Always better safe than sorry, and as others have stated, even in a commited relationship, people cheat. Always get tested to make sure, even if you were faithful, that is not guarantee. The testing is free, just make sure you ask for all the tests, not just the standard ones they give.

ladismile79

Joined: 11/10/2008

Msg: 19 (view)

Why I walked away for good Posted: 11/18/2008 10:57:23 PM
Did yu try to join him or is that a taboo of some sort? Well, LEANWORKS, we actually did everything he wanted to do and nothing I wanted to do. That was probably part of the problem. He usually got to make all the calls, and this time I didn't let him do what he wanted, and stick around to take it. Sometimes I just think that while I did my own thing and he his when we were out without each other, when we were out together, I had no say in anything. I think that usually it is good for both parties to compromise and try things each of you like. I don't think that is taboo at all, but that is my personal opinion. SOMEONE PLEASE TELL ME WHAT OP STANDS FOR? LOL

ladismile79

Joined: 11/10/2008

Msg: 18 (view)

Why I walked away for good Posted: 11/18/2008 10:51:16 PM
OK, for some reason, I haven't been able to answer any of the questions in this because I can't figure out how to post the answers. Maybe this will work. I am not some paranoid person who believes my man is doing something when he is gone out of my sight for 2 sec. You will believe what you will, and that is fine. When I asked my ex for clarification of his statement, that if I let him do what he wanted we would be happy, to told me he was referring to sleeping with other women. I have never in my life called the police to report him missing! lol You must have had some pretty interesting relationships of your own to assume that I am that paranoid. Confirmation: I fully believe that it is healthy, and the only way to have a working relationship, is to have individual time away from the other person. You cannot be happy together if there is no time apart, in my experience. However; I also believe in manogamy, and after being told, by him, that he wanted to sleep around, I had no choice but to leave! I have not said more about him because I am also not one to trash another person needlessly!! I was simply trying to see if this is a common occurance in relationships, and I asked my question. If you wish for me to bash the man, you will not get me to do that. I have more respect for myself than to fall to that level!

ladismile79

Joined: 11/10/2008

Msg: 85 (view)

Funniest thing ever happened to you during sex? Posted: 11/16/2008 10:53:32 PM
My ex had just gotten his tongue re-pierced, and I had just gotten my cltr*s pierced, and ummmm.... they got stuck barbell in ring. He's claustrophobic lol so it took a bit of time and a bit of pain for him to get loose. lol

ladismile79

Joined: 11/10/2008

Msg: 45 (view)

Favorite Quotes...... Posted: 11/16/2008 10:30:23 PM
"Find out who you are, and do it on purpose" Dolly Parton

ladismile79

Joined: 11/10/2008

Msg: 1 (view)

Is Monogamy dead? Posted: 11/16/2008 4:09:02 AM
I was raised that when you are with someone in a committed relationship, it should be monogamous. I fully believe in this, and have never cheated on anyone. Most people I ask, mostly men, tell me that this is not realistic, and that everyone cheats. They tell me that the only difference is whether or not you get caught. Is Monogamy actually dead? Is it too much to ask for to be with one person only and have that person be faithful as well?

ladismile79

Joined: 11/10/2008

Msg: 1 (view)

Why I walked away for good Posted: 11/16/2008 3:16:58 AM
After 8 years, on and off, my ex fiancee/common-law husband tells me "I love you and I don't want to live without you. If you would just let me do what I want to do then come home to you, everything would be great." Has anyone else ever been told this? All I had to do was let him sleep around and we would have "been happy" together?

ladismile79

Joined: 11/10/2008

Msg: 192 (view)

The worst breakup line ever Posted: 11/16/2008 2:50:27 AM
How about after 4 years, my ex comes home and tells me, "Every time you touch me it makes me want to cringe up and die.", then informs me that he can't be with me anymore because he got a new girlfriend that afternoon!! How is that for worst break-up lines!

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