Why Is it you do everything for a woman and then you get thrown to the curb like a piece of trash? chat & forums.

Posted In Forum:

Home

MyForums

Show ALL Forums

Author

Thread: Why Is it you do everything for a woman and then you get thrown to the curb like a piece of trash?

ZarinaZ

Joined: 11/15/2005

Msg: 16 (view)

Why Is it you do everything for a woman and then you get thrown to the curb like a piece of trash? Posted: 8/7/2007 12:16:10 AM
Hard to hear this...I have been going thru the same thing...do for him and have him not appreciate it. And then when I don't answer a call, respond to a text...it's like omg where are you? Oh let me see, you sent me home from your place cuz we couldnt work thru it...we needed time from eachother. Damn, I am so, so tired! Just give me a man who appreciates me and what I do for him. Sorry, don't mean to vent here, but it seemed appropriate...it's not just women, men do it too ~~ feeling like my head hit the curb on the way out.

ZarinaZ

Joined: 11/15/2005

Msg: 37 (view)

Are you really what you portray in your profile? Posted: 8/3/2007 12:12:29 AM
Girl, I here you on that one. It's like when they want to chat or email you...and ask questions that are clearly stated on your profile. I am as truthful as I can be on mine and hope more would do the same. And yes, I have met people here who weren't, the worse said he was single, only to find out he was married and considering an open relationship...go figure ~~ Z

ZarinaZ

Joined: 11/15/2005

Msg: 2 (view)

I've finally found her... Posted: 8/3/2007 12:04:05 AM
Wow...that is beautiful...I wish he would find me ~~ Z

ZarinaZ

Joined: 11/15/2005

Msg: 9 (view)

Ugh... I messed up big time. Posted: 8/2/2007 11:44:38 PM
Well it sounds like you did what you needed to for "yourself"! I think we sometimes forget how important "we" are, and let others drag us down. I am a product of that...I can give out the advise, but rarely follow what I tell others. I myself have a huge heart and allow others to step on it, over and over again. When you love someone its easy to let them do what they do...we are blind by it. Hopefully, like me, you will start to heal and realize you deserve the best for yourself. Sounds like you are a decent person, so I'm wishing you well on your new ventures in life ~~ Z

ZarinaZ

Joined: 11/15/2005

Msg: 5 (view)

Trying too hard - My sob story & lessons learned Posted: 7/6/2007 11:12:48 PM
Sorry to hear this story, but sounds like the abuse I have taken too...I don't get it...it always seems the more I give, the more people take. If we don't allow them to use us in this manner, then they can't. I would love to have a man in my life who is understanding of me, and can listen to me and not shut the "doors" of communication. I understand about the texting thing, when all you want to do is talk... A healthy relationship always takes compromise...but to what extent do we make changes without the other willing to do the same. Idk...life is hard enough without trying to be with someone and simply be happy. I wish you alot of luck...and feel bad I never crossed your profile unitl now reading this...only cuz I was feeling really down and it caught my eye...Take care and much luck to you too!! ~ Z

ZarinaZ

Joined: 11/15/2005

Msg: 227 (view)

Honest Liars? Posted: 3/13/2007 10:03:40 PM
Well, I have found many here are deceptive and shallow. If you don't fit the image they look for the quality doesnt matter either. I have tried to be nice to most that I am not interested in and have been very detailed in stating what I am about and what I am looking for...and some just don't get it. A clear example is that I do not do "one nite bedtime stories", and if you are able to read between the lines, you would get that, however I still get contacted by people loolking for an intimate encounter. What the heck...are they deluded or what? I am confident in who I am and what I deserve...as should everyone else. We just have to read it to see if "its" there.

ZarinaZ

Joined: 11/15/2005

Msg: 14 (view)

What did I do wrong?.... Posted: 11/26/2006 7:06:58 PM
Wrong girl for the right guy. Sorry, but not all women are this way. Age may have something to do with it as well. Men have done this to me as well. Honesty is hard to come by and with age it hasn't gotten much better. Finding the right person seems to be the hardest thing these days....move on and be more aware of where you give yourself to.

ZarinaZ

Joined: 11/15/2005

Msg: 43 (view)

True love.... Posted: 11/26/2006 6:51:15 PM
Awwwwwwwww....love it!! Nice words.

ZarinaZ

Joined: 11/15/2005

Msg: 42 (view)

True love.... Posted: 11/26/2006 6:50:16 PM
I don't know if I believe in it as much as I hope for it. People should not take advantage of it or take it for granted. Love is precious and should be treated as such. Not everyone is lucky enough to find love and have it reciprocated...such is the case for me. I am even after this last breakup, ever hopeful...:)

ZarinaZ

Joined: 11/15/2005

Msg: 8 (view)

Am I missing something.............. Posted: 11/26/2006 6:44:08 PM
Geez...didn't know this was an essay format. Hmmmmmmmmmm....let me punctuate however I like. This isn't the forum for your opinion on it. The guy asked for help, not sarcasm.

ZarinaZ

Joined: 11/15/2005

Msg: 5 (view)

Am I missing something.............. Posted: 11/26/2006 4:39:59 PM
WOW!! Very intense...who wouldnt want someone to feel that way about them...I know I do...what I yearn for...however you like me probably fall too fast for the wrong people. I just recently learned that one again...damn when can I get it right? Your words by the way are amazing....good luck ~ ZZ

ZarinaZ

Joined: 11/15/2005

Msg: 298 (view)

would you take a partner back after they had sex with someone else during a breakup? Posted: 11/26/2006 4:29:11 PM
I have....a couple of times. The ex bf of 3 years and the recent relationship. People cheat/have sex with others for a reason. You need to find the reason between the two of you to understand it and fix it....or it will happen again. If you love someone enough, forgiving them is part of it. Good luck with this one...I know it hurts ~ ZZ

ZarinaZ

Joined: 11/15/2005

Msg: 54 (view)

Having Him as a Friend or Not At All, which pain is worse?? Posted: 11/26/2006 4:23:52 PM
This is most difficult. My ex-boyfriend of 3 years, now knowing him 4. He just came back from Iraq...well letting go is the most difficult thing...here is something I posted on a blog...I hope it helps. FYI, it took me a while to get out again, and well I just broke up with a guy I feel for....he doesnt feel the same and honesty was an issue. He thought he was ready, I opened my heart, only to be hurt once again. Take care of yourself, do for yourself, and be ok with yourself....then the right guy will find you....at least that is my hope, what I have to start doing as well. Love should not be painful...BTW...The ex bf and I are the best of friends and although I think he sabotaged this last realationship...he does still care for me. We will always be the "best" of friends...that kinda love never changes....HERE GOES: If a romance isn't meant to be… you can't make it so.... If you're like most people, you've experienced longing over a past relationship. You may have spent weeks, months, years even pining over someone, convinced that if you just tried hard enough, you could make it all work out and live happily ever after. If you find yourself in this situation (or you've been there before), you're not alone. But there are a few key things you have to remember if you ever want to start feeling better, get back out there – and find the right person. First, while we all do create our own realities, we don't create someone else's. A relationship requires two equally committed parties -- not to mention the right timing -- in order to have a fighting chance. This may sound simple. After all, two requirements isn't a lot, right? But as anyone who has managed to reconcile with a long lost lover will tell you (high school sweethearts who meet up years later post-divorces come to mind), timing is everything! Men, in particular, often want to have certain aspects of their lives in order before they'll settle down. So it doesn't matter who or what comes along, if they're not ready to settle down, they're not ready. And no matter what you say or do, you can't change that. Contrary to popular belief, the same goes for the ladies -- particularly if they're mired in past romances gone wrong. Mr. Perfect could be standing right in front of a heartbroken woman and she'd be highly unlikely to notice – no matter how grand his gestures. So what does this mean? It means you've got to get present. The only time that matters is NOW! This is the secret to letting go. Now, that doesn't mean it's going to be easy. Sometimes what's right for the now isn't pleasant. It means mourning. Losing a relationship is like a mini-death, and depending on how close the bond was, it may take a while to get over. Some may advise that the best way to get over a break up is to get right back out there and start dating, but the opposite is true for one very simple reason. What you don't mourn now, you'll wind up mourning later – and longer -- because the pain will be compounded by whatever has transpired in between. Allow yourself the time to heal. And while you're healing, use the time to grow. Look at yourself and your behaviors instead of analyzing the other person (since you can't affect/change or influence them anyway!). Don't waste time on what you could have done differently to get a different outcome, but rather think about what you'd like to change for the next time you get involved. This way you can bring your best you to the relationship table. Lastly, it's most important that you understand no one but you can make you happy. This sounds trite when you're in the heat of heartbreak, but it's true. Expecting that someone else can make or break your happiness assures you only that you'll never be happy. Not for the long run anyway because contentment comes from within. Consider how you can best take care of yourself (eating right, exercising, getting out with your friends and also taking adequate time alone come to mind) and make an honest effort to do so. And while it may not help now to hear this, know that it's true: with time, things get better. No matter how intense you feel your love was, how different and unique and special, others have felt that way and moved on. Trust in the universe. If you do the work, you will reap the rewards – though they may look different than what you expect. One thing however, is for certain. You will love again and you should start by loving yourself......Time is ever so precious.....Try not to waste one moment of it. ~ ZZ

ZarinaZ

Joined: 11/15/2005

Msg: 45 (view)

Do people only want looks? A perfect girl or guy? Posted: 7/5/2006 9:37:37 PM
I like your sense of humor...lol. Yes we were all short at one time...I just never got much taller...I hear what your saying though...some pics are better than others...it's just too bad people can't pass that initial first impression...looks...ugh!! People are all beautiful in different ways, the challenge is finding someone who sees it too.

ZarinaZ

Joined: 11/15/2005

Msg: 9 (view)

Second party in Springs July 8th! Posted: 6/28/2006 7:41:50 PM
Not definite, but should be fun....will try to make it ~

ZarinaZ

Joined: 11/15/2005

Msg: 301 (view)

full-time single dads Posted: 6/24/2006 10:18:57 PM
Good words, thanks for the encouragement...not too often I have met men who can step up to the plate...KUDOS to you...take care and keep up the good work~~ Z

ZarinaZ

Joined: 11/15/2005

Msg: 300 (view)

full-time single dads Posted: 6/24/2006 10:17:01 PM
wow...well i dont agree...seems the other way around, but maybe u like i have met the wrong single parents..idk...good luck though, like myself, there are some good ones out here ~ Z

zarinaz

Joined: 11/15/2005

Msg: 29 (view)

What is a good way to get over a past Relationship? Posted: 4/18/2006 10:41:17 PM
That is totally not funny...my son just had his best friend almost die that exact same way this past weekend...and at 14 what does that say? Geez...have a clue.

zarinaz

Joined: 11/15/2005

Msg: 28 (view)

What is a good way to get over a past Relationship? Posted: 4/18/2006 10:39:39 PM
Wow!! I can truly relate...I just set my ex free...as much as it hurts, I need for him to be happy that's how much I care....I too tried to figure him out for months, and where the relationship went wrong..I have made myself sick, emotionally, mentally, and most importantly, spiritually...I never again want to have someone affect my life that much...but again, that's the effect love has on some...especially when it's not reciprocated...I realized that it wasn't so much me as it was him that had the most effect on our relationship...but then that's where honesty & communication comes in...life is far too short to play life games...

zarinaz

Joined: 11/15/2005

Msg: 27 (view)

What is a good way to get over a past Relationship? Posted: 4/18/2006 10:32:05 PM
I laughed..at first I thought WHAT??? thanks, I needed it...i too need help...lol.

zarinaz

Joined: 11/15/2005

Msg: 26 (view)

What is a good way to get over a past Relationship? Posted: 4/18/2006 10:30:27 PM
It's gonna take time..if he truly cared about her, it takes time for the wounds to heal...I am in process too and can't wait til it stops hurting so much. I think spending time staying busy is the best thing..go out, enjoy nature, listen to music..not the love songs...lol, and just start being around other people again. Once he starts to feel better he will start to attract other people and hopefully get over this girl...geez I wish I could listen to my own advise..I am trying though..:) Forum Posting Guidelines

zarinaz

Joined: 11/15/2005

Msg: 25 (view)

What is a good way to get over a past Relationship? Posted: 4/18/2006 10:27:19 PM
Thanks...I was just crusin thru this section and found this ...I too have been drowning and not sure how to lick my wounds..he is still overseas and has totally crushed my heart with recent awareness of disnhonesty, indefedities, and pure deceit...How does one trust again? I am trying to get back out there...I know now I deserved better! I know what you mean about listening to yourself, however it's hard to hear when your too close to the situation...I am now trying to distance myself...:)

zarinaz

Joined: 11/15/2005

Msg: 171 (view)

Why do guys always do this to me? Does anyone else have this problem?... Posted: 1/17/2006 3:08:12 AM
so so true...i wonder...i like the dart thing though..take some agression out without hurting anyone...lol. I truly believe in the karma thing, however don't let a future potential relationship be clouded by a past idiot...not all men are the same. Though keep your heart guarded...we have too much to offer!!!

zarinaz

Joined: 11/15/2005

Msg: 170 (view)

Why do guys always do this to me? Does anyone else have this problem?... Posted: 1/17/2006 3:04:12 AM
Not all nonsense....my ex is in Iraq...yes my heart is broken..I hurt him and now he won't let me back in...he too has issues with commitment, otherwise things would be different today. I am not clingly...especially in his situation it is easier to push love away...for many reasons..one not holding me back while he is gone for a year or more..idk..i think she should dump the guy..love is too precious to waste or throw away...to hard to find in the first place.

zarinaz

Joined: 11/15/2005

Msg: 6 (view)

my broken heart Posted: 1/17/2006 2:54:47 AM
Love sucks sometimes..I can relate the same kind of thing recently happened to me. It's hard to understand how someone can love you so much and hurt you as well. I don't have much advise, except stay busy, let time go by and see what happens. Hopefully for both of us our hearts will be able to be at peace. Hopefully the loneliness will regress and life again will get sunny and not seem as if a black cloud resides over our hearts...take care.

zarinaz

Joined: 11/15/2005

Msg: 12 (view)

oh my god.....i'm over him Posted: 1/12/2006 12:40:15 AM
I surely hope so...I am dealing with that now..a fairly new break up after 3 years and he is in Iraq and doesn't want to deal with our relationship right now.."Move on he says"...right i am trying but it's not easy...I'm glad your light switched on..looking for mine.

ZarinaZ

Joined: 11/15/2005

Msg: 77 (view)

Should I trust her? Posted: 11/15/2005 9:42:24 AM
First, Trust is VERY Important! Don't just follow your heart blindly, it will get you hurt. I have had issues with trust before and it can turn you inside and out. There has to be a mutual respect for each other, if not move on. I have made mistakes in the past when pushed away or feeling rejected by a loved one. It is not worth the hurt feelings later. I believe she knew exactly what she was doing. Hey you sound too down too earth and are very attractive as well. Don't let her fool you. I know people deserve a second chance, I know I did. I guess time will tell. I wish you much luck, but be careful. Something about her I definetely don't trust. And her knowing you were there, well not smart at all...think she's is not being totally honest. Been there done that not to lose someone...now it's 3 years later and the ugly demons are raising their ugly little heads. I don't want you in the same boat. Life is too short!!!

Show ALL Forums