What's the upside to being over 50 and single chat & forums.

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Saturday Night Rocks

Joined: 11/20/2005

Msg: 177 (view)

What's the upside to being over 50 and single Posted: 11/22/2009 1:45:41 PM
You can do anything that you want to without having to get an "OK" from your significant other. I have been single for 10 years now. Most of that time has been spent on raising my children, my career, extended family and earning a second college degree. Although I occasionally miss having spouse or girlfriend around, when I see the state of many of my acquaintence's relationships, I'm really ok with being single!

Saturday Night Rocks

Joined: 11/20/2005

Msg: 36 (view)

New Term? TWIT which is supposed to mean Thirty something Women In their Teens Posted: 10/2/2009 10:21:10 PM
I've noticed more women who married in their twenties are abandoning that marriage in their thirties and turning to a party life style. If they want to so be it, but I hate to see moms leaving their families just to go and party . . .

Saturday Night Rocks

Joined: 11/20/2005

Msg: 82 (view)

Is it possible for men to flirt Posted: 9/27/2009 6:48:34 PM
Is it possible for men to flirt I have no idea . . . By the way Ms. Not.a.Nurse, where have you been all my life??

Saturday Night Rocks

Joined: 11/20/2005

Msg: 28 (view)

At what age were you truly ready? Posted: 9/27/2009 6:34:53 PM
A friend and I were talking about this very issue recently. We came to the conclusion that someone should be 26+ before making marriage decisions. Younger than that, it's usually all about hormones . . .

Saturday Night Rocks

Joined: 11/20/2005

Msg: 112 (view)

Have relationships made you bitter? Posted: 9/21/2009 6:30:37 PM
No bitter at all about life, life is what you make of it. As far as relationships go, my perception of them has changed as I've gotten older. I don't think that people are as committed to making marriages work as I did when I was younger. Seen too many people leave their spouses when they didn't feel their needs were being met. And I don't mean over years of neglect either. So I'm very reluctant to do much other than date casually with no expectations of anything long-term . . .

Saturday Night Rocks

Joined: 11/20/2005

Msg: 74 (view)

should I tell His wife he's cheating? Posted: 9/18/2009 5:44:16 PM
should I tell His wife he's cheating? Time wounds all heels . . .

Saturday Night Rocks

Joined: 11/20/2005

Msg: 8 (view)

Second Weddings Posted: 9/12/2009 9:02:52 PM
Not helping with the wedding plans Silken Fire. I've only been to one one "second" wedding before - second for the guy, first for her... It was a big wedding, the only "non-traditional aspect was that the wedding was held right at the reception hall. It was very nice. Gifts were pretty much just gift cards or cash . . .

Saturday Night Rocks

Joined: 11/20/2005

Msg: 1 (view)

Second Weddings Posted: 9/12/2009 8:29:26 PM
So you've been widowed or divorced. You meet someone who seems like the next Mr/Ms Right, and decide to get married. How elaborate should a second wedding be, and what type of gifts would guests be expected to give? (Close friend is getting remarried soon; second wedding for both, and I'm looking for some advice)

Saturday Night Rocks

Joined: 11/20/2005

Msg: 73 (view)

My boyfriend feels he hasnt slept with enough women. Posted: 9/11/2009 7:27:32 PM
My boyfriend feels he hasnt slept with enough women. Dump the M.F. He WILL cheat if he has the chance . . .

Saturday Night Rocks

Joined: 11/20/2005

Msg: 98 (view)

Does your ex still calls you? Posted: 9/10/2009 6:02:00 PM
She usually calls or drunk-texts me on weekend nights between midnight and 2:30am. BTW, it has been 10 years since we split up . . .

Saturday Night Rocks

Joined: 11/20/2005

Msg: 204 (view)

Why are we still so affraid to let people in? Posted: 9/9/2009 7:25:07 PM
Why are we still so afraid to let people in? I think a lot of people ARE that jaded. Just looking at my circle of friends, I see very few older adults who are willing to jump right back in to the dating pool after taking an emotional beating. Although love is grand, the pain of losing a relationship (especially if it is broken through infidelity) is almost worse than the joy of having it. I personally think the phrase "better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all" is bullsshhitt!

Saturday Night Rocks

Joined: 11/20/2005

Msg: 122 (view)

Men over 50 what do you do? Posted: 8/11/2009 7:23:20 PM
Men over 50 what do you do? I shave and shower daily, brush my teeth twice a day, and take geritol . . .

Saturday Night Rocks

Joined: 11/20/2005

Msg: 27 (view)

Does this happen alot? Posted: 8/11/2009 7:17:44 PM
I have been on this site almost 4 years, and it has NEVER happened to me. (Is my breath THAT bad??)

Saturday Night Rocks

Joined: 11/20/2005

Msg: 127 (view)

Did you really give it your all? Posted: 8/11/2009 4:40:54 PM
There were a few things tht I would change, but not many. I believe she would have left even if I HAD done everything right. She wanted to live the party life, not raise a family, and she's still doing the same thing 10 years after . . .

Saturday Night Rocks

Joined: 11/20/2005

Msg: 178 (view)

whats your Longest Relationship??? Posted: 8/6/2009 11:29:08 PM
About 16 years (with my ex-wife). That ended 10 years ago. Nothing significant since . :-/

Saturday Night Rocks

Joined: 11/20/2005

Msg: 118 (view)

When the bill comes on a first date... Posted: 7/14/2009 7:26:13 PM
That being said, I would not spend more than 50 - 60 bucks on the first date...

Saturday Night Rocks

Joined: 11/20/2005

Msg: 117 (view)

When the bill comes on a first date... Posted: 7/14/2009 7:25:13 PM
First Date - The Guy Pays That's everything I have to say about it!

Saturday Night Etc . . .

Joined: 11/20/2005

Msg: 85 (view)

What kind of man/woman do you think you attract? Posted: 7/13/2009 7:10:20 PM
What kind of man/woman do you think you attract? Apparently, I attract invisible ones!

Saturday Night Etc . . .

Joined: 11/20/2005

Msg: 27 (view)

How Long Posted: 7/12/2009 6:16:28 PM
Parrothead, I don't think there is a "pat" answer for this. It would depend on the person, the nature of the relationship, how it ended, etc... My mother passed away going on 7 years ago, and my father is still "getting over it" (do you really ever get over it?). I split up with my wife of 14 years almost ten years ago, and I haven't had an LTR since. On the other hand, I know people who have divorced, met someone, and remarried within two years. Personally, I don't think someone is over a previous LTR for at least a couple years, but the desire for a physical relationship may push someone to get back into a relationship before they are ready.

have a donut

Joined: 11/20/2005

Msg: 192 (view)

what do men consider overweight? Posted: 7/6/2009 10:46:54 PM
What do men consider overweight? It would be hypocritical of men to hold women to a standard to which they themselves do not measure up. I've been a forum junkie on POF for about 4 years. I'm just under 6' tall (5'11 1/2"). Over that time. I've gone from 175 lbs up to my present 190 lbs thanks to a new desk job and 55 - 60 hour work week. I'm not happy with myself at the moment, but my women friends say I still look great and don't need to lose weight. So I guess it's the old self-perception thing. An anorexic person can look like a skeleton with skin stretched over it, and they still want to lose weight, and there are other people (especially on POF) that list themselves as "average", and their photos show someone who needs to lose 30+ lbs! As far as women go, if a woman's waist is bigger around than her hips or her top, I think she needs to lose weight...

have a donut

Joined: 11/20/2005

Msg: 16 (view)

Is every girl in my state crazy? Posted: 7/5/2009 4:27:40 PM
Is every girl in my state crazy? Yes they are. The altitude, salt-dust and Osmond Family music have taken their collective toll. How sad . . .

have a donut

Joined: 11/20/2005

Msg: 48 (view)

Too Busy With Work and Kids To Date.... Posted: 7/1/2009 5:50:52 PM
These people with 3 and 4 kids...is a hell of a lot to take on. And they probably (especially the men ) do not have the time. And I sometimes ask myself if I really want to be involved with that kind of deal anyway??? Not really. Anyone with that many kids probably should be home raising them and making sure they don't end up being grandparents at a young age. They will not have time for a normal relationship with that much drama going on. I am just realistic with these people with multiple kids. My experiences when I was attempting to date were in line with the comments above. Whe I got into my later 40's, work started to consume a lot more of my time. Now between kids and work, not only do I have little time for dating, I have even less inclination to . . . I suppose if someone exceptional came along, I'd attempt to make time for dating, but I have lost almost all interest in actively seeking a relationship. Maybe in another 5 years, when the kids are all out on their own, I'll feel differently. There is something liberating about not being ruled by the need for a relationship . . .

have a donut

Joined: 11/20/2005

Msg: 5 (view)

double standard, shirtless is flaggable but not cleavage Posted: 6/29/2009 6:03:27 PM
why the double standard with men being flagged for going topless but women can post cleavage down to their Y&Y? Vive la difference!

have a donut

Joined: 11/20/2005

Msg: 46 (view)

Why is our ability to cook/clean so important to men? Posted: 6/29/2009 6:01:05 PM
Why is our ability to cook/clean so important to men? Surely you don't expect us to get off the couch and get our OWN food, do you? And those dirty dishes don't wash themselves! (ok, I'm joking, but the OP's question begged a response like this one)

have a donut

Joined: 11/20/2005

Msg: 128 (view)

Do abusers end up alone? Posted: 6/28/2009 7:36:02 PM
Do abusers end up alone? We can only hope . . .

have a donut

Joined: 11/20/2005

Msg: 98 (view)

How badly do you want to be in love? Posted: 6/28/2009 7:33:35 PM
If you could put down into words the thing that you seek, how would you state it? What words could you use to define what you really and truly are looking for in a significant other? How do you want to say what maybe you can't in your profile? Ahem (clears throat) - "Yawn" That says it all . . .

have a donut

Joined: 11/20/2005

Msg: 18 (view)

Over 40 crowd. Women calling. Do men like it??? Posted: 6/28/2009 7:01:34 PM
If you are referring to making first contact with a man, I don't care for it. I feel that the natural role is for the man to be the pursuer. If the ice has already been broken, and you have been out on a date or two, I would be ok with the woman calling. If a guy is interested, and the woman has given any kind of positive response, he will continue to pursue. This flip-side is, playing "hard to get" isn't going to work with most guys. If he doesn't think you are interested, he's going to move on (if he is a normal guy).

Have a donut

Joined: 11/20/2005

Msg: 74 (view)

Men over 50 what do you do? Posted: 6/27/2009 4:51:00 PM
I just leave my reading glasses off and everything looks fine... ...of course there's always the option of hiding the mirrors as well...

Have a donut

Joined: 11/20/2005

Msg: 80 (view)

How far would you travel for a love affair? Posted: 6/27/2009 4:48:52 PM
Anything within walking distance would be a plus! I would prefer to meet someone who lives within an hour drive from my house, but hey - anything is possible!

Have a donut

Joined: 11/20/2005

Msg: 194 (view)

Single for longer than you expected? Posted: 6/27/2009 4:45:55 PM
Song Sparrow, I definitely agree - time flies... It's been ten years since I split with the ex. Never would have guess that ten years would pass with no new LTR. I hope things work out for you!

have a donut

Joined: 11/20/2005

Msg: 6 (view)

Single Fathers, Dating, Divorced or Seperated Posted: 6/14/2009 11:14:55 AM
What prompted you (single fathers, divorced or separated) to date while your life can be jammed with children, work, and personal life already? I've been divorced for ten years. When my ex and I split up, my kids were still very young; ages 12 down to 6. I didn't date at all for about 3 years. When I started dating, it was mainly to have some interaction with females, and prepare for the time when I "would be ready for a relationship". My personal life WAS full, and I found little free time to date. As several years passed. I generally found that women did not want involvement in a situation where there were 4 children and "mommy drama". Other than occasionally going out to dinner with lady friends, I have not been dating for the past 2 1/2 years... 2. If you are dating someone (or more than one), what are you expecting to get out of your dating experiences? What is dating to you? Not dating at this time... 3. Are you likely to have more children in the future since you already have children? or do you prefer to find a lady who is not in a set mind to have her own? What are your concerns and if any, are they related to how your children from the previous marriage will relate to your children from future marriage. When I was first back in the dating pool, I was interested in possibly having more children. Once I got into my later 40's I decided that it would not be practical to have children at my age, as I don't want to be raising teen-agers when I'm retired. LoL! I'm also reluctant to get involved with a woman who has young children now. Life changes over time, and along with that our needs and wants change too. Once my kids are entirely on their own, I may get involved with someone again, but it is no longer a priority for me.

have a donut

Joined: 11/20/2005

Msg: 14 (view)

Does my independence scare men off? Posted: 6/6/2009 4:37:32 PM
Do you feel like your independence is scaring off men? I can't speak for twentysomethings at this point, but I think that established men appreciate a woman who is accomplished and able to fend for herself...

have a donut

Joined: 11/20/2005

Msg: 3 (view)

Healed from divorce or lingering baggage. Posted: 6/4/2009 7:14:10 PM
Hi Sharky Just my opinion; you are best off waiting until your divorce is final before you start dating again.

have a donut

Joined: 11/20/2005

Msg: 37 (view)

Why did you get divorced? Posted: 6/1/2009 6:26:41 PM
I didn't get along with her boyfriend . . . Hey, it's the truth!

have a donut

Joined: 11/20/2005

Msg: 157 (view)

Could you live with clone of yourself? Posted: 5/31/2009 8:23:52 PM
Ya. Great sense of humor, considerate, pay my own way, and a good conversationalist. What more do you need??

have a donut

Joined: 11/20/2005

Msg: 106 (view)

Why is there so little dating between white men and black women? Posted: 5/31/2009 8:20:29 PM
My personal opinion, I don't believe most people are open to dating outside their own race. Some people do, but it's not common . . .

have a donut

Joined: 11/20/2005

Msg: 17 (view)

Question for you guys Posted: 5/31/2009 8:04:09 PM
There are plenty of guys over 40 who are interested in long-term, but you will find a lot of guys are cautious, and understandably so. The other thing is, they may not be broadcasting the fact that they are available. Keep your ears open and sooner or later you will find a guy who's interested in a relationship.

Have a donut

Joined: 11/20/2005

Msg: 11 (view)

30 is the new 14. Posted: 5/8/2009 2:13:43 AM
If 30 is the new 14, I have no idea what 50 is... Now if you would excuse me, I need to get back to my X-box... Oh wait, someone just txt'd me! I g/g TTYL

have a donut

Joined: 11/20/2005

Msg: 27 (view)

Are his/her music tastes important to you? Posted: 4/23/2009 5:30:22 PM
Are his/her music tastes important to you? Screamo, Speed-metal and Rap drive me crazy. And then there's Polka :-/,

have a donut

Joined: 11/20/2005

Msg: 48 (view)

How long did it take you to stop looking at profiles/message ppl and just go forums? Posted: 4/22/2009 7:41:15 PM
How long did it take you to stop looking at profiles/message ppl and just go forums? Do you want it in hours or in minutes??

have a donut

Joined: 11/20/2005

Msg: 12 (view)

Do you believe a man of today, still understands the true meaning of romance? Posted: 4/20/2009 11:25:44 PM
Throw out what's on the tube. The issue is that modern society is in direct opposition to romance. We live in an "Instant Gratification" society that's used to getting everything "fast-food" style. I also think that real romance has given way cheap talk. Although I love America, the Europeans have a more realistic view of life. To use an analogy, instead of being so concerned about the destination, take some time and enjoy the drive...

have a donut

Joined: 11/20/2005

Msg: 3 (view)

What's with them? Posted: 4/18/2009 7:12:34 PM
No offense, but how many people live in Bear River? 50?? You may need to try something different to enlarge your pool of potential dates...

have a donut

Joined: 11/20/2005

Msg: 34 (view)

Would you date someone your son's age? Posted: 4/18/2009 7:02:52 PM
Would you date someone your son's age? He's only 15. I think I would get arrested; or worse - SHOT!

have a donut

Joined: 11/20/2005

Msg: 54 (view)

Why Are Over 45 Men In Love With Motorcycles? Posted: 4/18/2009 2:01:37 PM
Guys, is there some constant you see in us ladies over 45? Inquiring minds want to know! The only common thread I see is either a woman's kids or her pets. As far as guys and their motorcycles, most guys like powerful noisy machines. It's in our blood. Don't ask us to change; it's just what we are!

have a donut

Joined: 11/20/2005

Msg: 7 (view)

Given up, or just in a 'good place'? Posted: 4/17/2009 4:43:51 PM
Yet much of the internal drive I've had to find a relationship has all but vanished. Even as I've had more opportunities, I just haven't had any desire to connect. About a week back I ended up exchanging photos via e-mail after a friends birthday party with a young woman about my age who genuinely sociable and attractive...but I just couldn't find a part of me that wanted to do anything more than exchange a few light e-mails and leave it at that. Zyphr, I have no idea why desire fades, but I have experienced very similar feelings over the past couple of years. My most recent date was about 3 months ago with a woman I knew from high school. She was very pleasant, attractive and fun to be with. Yet I didn't pursue a follow-up date, even though it was obvious she was interested. There is a force that I call "emotional energy" which seems to be lacking in my life, and the lives of several of my friends. We are ok with where we are in life; we are happy with our jobs, family and friends, and there is no burning desire to get involved with anyone at this time. I suppose if I fell into the "perfect" situation, it might break me out of this apathy, but I don't see it happening any time soon . . . (and with the big Five-Oh right around the corner, I don't see my prospects getting any better)

Have a donut

Joined: 11/20/2005

Msg: 28 (view)

dirty place- nice guy Posted: 4/16/2009 7:11:30 PM
Tell me more about the roaches!! Did they look malnourished?? Maybe he's in touch with his inner salvage-worker!

moving in stereo

Joined: 11/20/2005

Msg: 19 (view)

Finally get it Posted: 4/15/2009 7:05:45 PM
When does it become life and not just exsisting I saw that someone else wrote "when you decide", and I disagree with that statement. I'm thinking when you look back on the years you've lived, you will realize there were MANY years of happiness in your life prior to ever meeting your former S.O. What did you do then that brought happiness to your life? If possible, revisit those experiences. Rediscover forgotten hobbies or neglected relationships that once made your life pleasant. I'm not saying this is a magic formula, but after my divorce, when I considered all aspects of my life, I reached the conclusion that I was plenty happy before I ever met "Miss Right (who turned into Miss Wrong after 15 yrs). There may be things that you always wanted to do, but didn't have the freedom to when you were in a relationship. Take advantage of your present opportunity and make the best of it. Life will go on, and it can be delightful!

moving in stereo

Joined: 11/20/2005

Msg: 351 (view)

What do men 60 plus want? Posted: 4/15/2009 6:56:00 PM
What do men 60 plus want? I'm guessing "someone who can fog a mirror . . ."

moving in stereo

Joined: 11/20/2005

Msg: 18 (view)

Just not going there any more. Posted: 4/15/2009 6:49:12 PM
What would you do at this age if you fell for someone hard, after you had pretty much promised yourself to keep it simple and stay unattached because of all the problems of the past with relationships? Well, I've never promised myself that I would "keep it simple and stay unnattached", but I did get to a point where I decded that I would not actively seek another relationship. If I meet someone exceptional in my travels, that would be great, but I'm not going out of my way to meet anyone. So if I ever do "fall for someone hard", I'll deal with it when the time comes. In the mean-time, I'll enjoy life like I always have...

moving in stereo

Joined: 11/20/2005

Msg: 85 (view)

What scares you the most about starting a relationship? Posted: 4/14/2009 7:58:22 PM
What scares you the most about starting a relationship? I am very independent and don't want to lose any of my autonomy.

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