online dating service
REGISTER | MAIL/PROFILE | HELP | NOW ONLINE | SEARCH | RATING | FORUMS | SUCCESS STORIES

 

     
Posted In Forum:
Home   login   MyForums  
Show ALL Forums  
 
 Author Thread: What are signs she's leading you on?
 That Handy Man
Joined: 11/23/2008
Msg: 19 (view)
 
What are signs she's leading you on?
Posted: 11/26/2009 6:50:09 PM
I'll just bet you do it. All that texting and talking! Wrong, wrong, wrong!

You think you are building a relationship. When in fact, she is slowly weeding you out using the convenience, safety and anonymity of her cell phone! Or just using you for entertainment or to boost her Ego.

Use, the phone to get a date, then no communication until the date. Disappear! Many times, she will actually become more interested in you, while absent, as opposed to dismissing you or getting bored with the same predicable (wussy) guy behavior on the phone!
 that handy man
Joined: 11/23/2008
Msg: 15 (view)
 
Do the Holidays add an extra yearning ?
Posted: 11/25/2009 8:31:37 PM
Last year I bought 1 (One) X-Mas present. For a Porcupine! My cat didn't really didn't need a fourth heating pad! lol

And that suits me just fine.

Now if I could just find someone to buy me a JD 850 Dozer (with GPS grade control) for this X-Mas, that would be swell!
 that handy man
Joined: 11/23/2008
Msg: 16 (view)
 
Inexperianced dater seeks advice on keeping a lady interested.
Posted: 11/25/2009 8:23:24 PM
All I can say, is that a man being a challenge creates attraction. Men don't have a clue about this and strangely, women don't either. I heard a saying, that says, act like you don't care about them and you will be doing everything right (to create attraction).

I stumbled onto this years ago, by accident. I wasn't sure if I wanted to become involved with a particular woman. And by the way, she was HOT! A danish, blond haired, big chested beauty! A real traffic stopper! So I played it cool, and took my time calling, only because I wanted to figure out what I wanted to do. Well, she came on to me, like gang busters! She was chasing me! It was a real ah ha moment!

NEVER again, will I be like a little dog, and chase after women! lol
 that handy man
Joined: 11/23/2008
Msg: 18 (view)
 
Ex Girlfriends as friends?
Posted: 11/25/2009 8:12:34 PM
I found everything was just peachy, until the old flame found out the new flame was much thinner! That was the end of that!
 That Handy Man
Joined: 11/23/2008
Msg: 21 (view)
 
In No Hurry
Posted: 11/24/2009 9:08:09 PM
^^^This may work for USED women but what about NEW ones?
 That Handy Man
Joined: 11/23/2008
Msg: 19 (view)
 
In No Hurry
Posted: 11/24/2009 8:51:38 PM
Well, that really is the quandary. Especially on line! If a guy shows he is too interested, he's not a challenge (which women mysteriously respond to) and women loose (or never develope) interest and dismiss him.

If he plays it cool, nothing will probably ever develope.

Now, of course I am talking about two people that have at least some attraction (as much as this medium can create) for each other. If it's one sided (and usually it is) then that doesn't count for anything.
 That Handy Man
Joined: 11/23/2008
Msg: 2605 (view)
 
what is everyones opin on tattoos?
Posted: 11/23/2009 8:54:14 PM
I have seen VERY few women with tats, that I considered really HOT. It's like with a guy. Only certain men (masculine, strong, genuine biker types) are suited to tats, in my opinion!

All to often, the wrong type of people follow these trends. Do less then attractive women, really think that tats and a face full of metal hardware make them somehow more attractive? Some remind me of a carp, with a whole lot of hooks in it's face!

In general, usually (but not exclusively) I don't see tats as being a sign of any great intelligence!

Does the one girl I remember seeing ten years ago with a NIKE tattoo on her angle still think that's so hot? lol
 That Handy Man
Joined: 11/23/2008
Msg: 75 (view)
 
People over 30 that are not taken - something wrong with them?
Posted: 11/23/2009 8:41:09 PM
Sorry but I didn't read the three pages of responses.

YES, definitely, there is SOMETHING wrong! I speak of both genders now. At the very worst, they have serious personality issues, and at best, they are just, well, different. Without a doubt, there is a social stigma, and we are a species that all too often looks upon our groups approval or opinion of a given thing, for us to make an assessment which one could really argue is then, not OUR decision at all.

So then, the problem is two fold, One is the original issue or problem that caused a person to remain "unchosen" and secondly is the social stigma attached to it.
 That Handy Man
Joined: 11/23/2008
Msg: 20 (view)
 
The best way to get over somebody is to find somebody else...
Posted: 11/23/2009 8:28:40 PM
Sure, this strategy seems to work, but it's also precisely why so many people never mature or grow. "Getting OVER someone" implies the focus is mostly about them, when in fact, it's mostly about US. Getting to know ourselves, our codependent or abandonment issues and such other UGLY things that are part of our programming.

It's why people get stuck in the cycle of becoming involved with the (wrong) (or right for spiritual growth) type of person again and again!
 That Handy Man
Joined: 11/23/2008
Msg: 15 (view)
 
Is it common to be bothered by this
Posted: 11/23/2009 7:48:14 PM
Unfortunately, dating can be a very convoluted affair. Sometimes neither person reveals their true (high) interest in the other, because it tends to (quite strangely) erode the other persons interest! So (from a man's perspective) sometimes a woman will act almost disinterested, and the guy will do the same! It's too bad, but it's the way it is.
 That Handy Man
Joined: 11/23/2008
Msg: 12 (view)
 
appropriate gifts
Posted: 11/23/2009 7:33:18 PM
^^^Ah come on! You just did that so you could SNIFF the OLD ONES!
 That Handy Man
Joined: 11/23/2008
Msg: 10 (view)
 
Are hot chicks naturally crazy?
Posted: 11/23/2009 7:12:30 PM
It's precisely why you have to ignore anything said (or texted) and just go by her physical actions! Does she touch you? Does she kiss you? Does she go out of her way to spend time (alone) with you. These things matter. Everything else does not!

Fortunately, this (bottom lining a woman's actions) cuts through the fog and BS quickly!
 That Handy Man
Joined: 11/23/2008
Msg: 4 (view)
 
Why does he say best date ever then not call?
Posted: 11/23/2009 7:02:31 PM
Maybe your giving yourself too much credit! Maybe the poor schmuck just had a lot of really bad dates! Hey, it happens!

Sometimes it's just buyers remorse! Somehow, we just don't feel the same, the next day! Something, just doesn't feel right.

Looked at your profile. You ARE a VERY attractive lady, so it isn't that! lol
 That Handy Man
Joined: 11/23/2008
Msg: 16 (view)
 
Question about a girl
Posted: 11/23/2009 6:37:33 PM
Sorry if I am missing something here. You NEVER even mention what your relationship is to this woman. If any! Are you just eavesdropping?

And whatever, like someone pointed out, she has a boyfriend!

Maybe she wants to give you the message, to buzz off! (And STOP listening to her conversations) (When's the last time anybody used that expression? lol)

Something a little creepy about this post.
 That Handy Man
Joined: 11/23/2008
Msg: 5 (view)
 
appropriate gifts
Posted: 11/23/2009 6:29:49 PM
You can never go wrong with TOOLS! In the old day, corded E-L-E-C-T-R-I-C tools were highly prized, but today things are going cordless. 18 VOLT is GOOD!
 That Handy Man
Joined: 11/23/2008
Msg: 19 (view)
 
what does it really take
Posted: 11/22/2009 6:15:49 PM
The Three "C"s

Confidence (Self Confidence)

Control (Self Control, Patience, Keeping Your Hands to Yourself, lol)

Challenge ( Being One! The thing that women respond to, don't realize it, and argue that it ain't so!)
 That Handy Man
Joined: 11/23/2008
Msg: 9 (view)
 
Fanning the Flames....
Posted: 11/22/2009 6:11:15 PM
I think social experimentation is fun and rewarding! Besides, I like Fire!
 That Handy Man
Joined: 11/23/2008
Msg: 50 (view)
 
Over-weight and unhappy a question for the Broken hearted
Posted: 11/20/2009 8:27:03 PM
Humans have this awful habit of externalizing their own issues and weaknesses or displacing it otherwise.

I'm sure some large people turn their own self loathing and even hatred onto someone that they perceive has rejected them. They simply can't blame themselves!
 That Handy Man
Joined: 11/23/2008
Msg: 21 (view)
 
I see alot of looking looking for good guys on profiles
Posted: 11/19/2009 5:19:27 PM
The problem is that women verbalize that they want such and such in a man,
but are in fact, sexually attracted to something entirely different! lol

Particularly but not exclusively before they had children.
 That Handy Man
Joined: 11/23/2008
Msg: 13 (view)
 
The first meeting
Posted: 11/17/2009 8:22:48 PM
Sad but true. Guys think it's just a friendly date, but in fact for her it's a disqualification process! You have the right to remain silent! I suggest you exercise that right! OR answer all questions in vague witticisms! lol

All the better if she "Hurls" You can demonstrate some chivalry by holding back her hair!
 That Handy Man
Joined: 11/23/2008
Msg: 12 (view)
 
easy going fun lovin...what happened?
Posted: 11/17/2009 8:08:06 PM
There is a way to be funny without appearing like a goof ball, not to be taken seriously. Many people might think I have a stick up my ass, and am too serious, but I routinely make people laugh. Personally, as far as women go, this works for me. Of course, some women are rigid, structured and/or have no sense of humour at all! As for these types, I have absolutely no interest in them , nor they in me, so this arrangement works well! lol

You also need to know about subject matter for humour. It mustn't be directed at anyone in the group, let's say!

Sometimes overly friendly people can actually wear people down. I dated one of those. Or people, that never shut up! Are you sure you have identified YOUR particular issue?
 That Handy Man
Joined: 11/23/2008
Msg: 11 (view)
 
What do you make of this?
Posted: 11/17/2009 7:36:20 PM
Sorry, but there is definitely a stigma attached to being single for any length of time. Women, seem to be aware of the interest other women show in a man. If no one seems interested, they arn't either! It is an indisputable fact, that goes by different names. Feast or famine, base of one factor! Basically, if you have one, you can get another, but if you have none, your basically screwed (probably the wrong word to use) !lol
 That Handy Man
Joined: 11/23/2008
Msg: 15 (view)
 
The Right apporach
Posted: 11/17/2009 7:17:34 PM
That's O.K. I suspect that this wouldn't have been the place for him!
 That Handy Man
Joined: 11/23/2008
Msg: 18 (view)
 
what am i doing wrong?
Posted: 11/17/2009 7:13:15 PM
It's funny how people ask questions like they have it MOSTLY figured out! They just need some verification or a few little pieces that are missing!

When in fact, they usually don't have a friggin clue!

You need to learn about genetic selection and you need to learn about matters that deal with female attraction mechanisms! Only then ,will any of it start to make sense!

One other thing you should realize. No matter who, or what you are, I'd say it's the next best thing to impossible to spark attraction (from a woman) on a dating site. Well, let me qualify that by saying, a woman that YOU might find attractive.
 That Handy Man
Joined: 11/23/2008
Msg: 14 (view)
 
Why ask a woman for her number?
Posted: 11/17/2009 7:06:30 PM
He was probably into numerology and needed to make some important calculations!
 That Handy Man
Joined: 11/23/2008
Msg: 15 (view)
 
what do you consider boring a boring guy?
Posted: 11/16/2009 10:20:17 AM
Boring means such different things to different personality types.

For a quiet reserved writer, being knowledgeable about life and a wide variety of topics might be considered not boring! Just don't expect too many thrill seekers to be interested!

In general though for any given type of woman, boring and PREDICTABLE are definitely the enemy and often the nail in the coffin of attraction!

Compatible humor is probably never boring!

vvvvvPost below. So true. Nothing can be so boring (to many) than people that go on and on about their stories. My Dad is like that and talks really slowly to boot! If people are interested, they will ask!!!! Often times, good listeners are not boring and in high demand, it seems! It's probaly the reason, we have two ears and only one mouth! lol
 That Handy Man
Joined: 11/23/2008
Msg: 20 (view)
 
Should I check him out? Will you?
Posted: 11/16/2009 10:07:54 AM
Just curious how one would know from a post what someone is really worth! lol

I think if you actually saw each other ten times, making one visit, especially if you are returning something, is hardly stalking!

What's with peoples preoccupation with these themes anyway?

But I'm just curious, and probably there isn't room left in this thread for an answer. What is it about a guy being aloof or disappearing that seems to create such intense interest in women? They seem to get bored and dismiss the men that chase them and are contacting them regularly, but go nuts and can't stop thinking about the guys that are unavailable! WHY?
 That Handy Man
Joined: 11/23/2008
Msg: 84 (view)
 
Coupons and Dating
Posted: 11/16/2009 9:55:44 AM
It is a very highly prized trait for a woman to be respectful of a man's money. And believe me, I know some women who make no secret about taking a man for all they can get!

I see far too much of this entitlement attitude. Or women that insist on elaborate dates! Skydiving, theme parks, going to restaurants that they would never think of paying for themselves! They arn't interested in the man, they want to be wined, dined and entertained! I guess, if there are suckers out there, more power to them! So many men, have no idea how much they are being used. lol

A number of women have described me as generous, but if I get any hint that a woman expects or worse demands something of me, she gets NOTHING from me at all!
 That Handy Man
Joined: 11/23/2008
Msg: 2 (view)
 
why if he stopped calling he acts interested?
Posted: 11/15/2009 10:06:31 PM
Of course you left out the single most important piece of information that we are bound to ask. Did you sleep with him?

If you did, I'm afraid you have your answer!
 That Handy Man
Joined: 11/23/2008
Msg: 82 (view)
 
Coupons and Dating
Posted: 11/15/2009 9:59:21 PM
^^Well, how would this be? Can't use my coupons, then YOU pay!

Problem solved!

Oh, And I'll be having the Lobster and Champagne
 That Handy Man
Joined: 11/23/2008
Msg: 3 (view)
 
Just asking if there is some sort of holiday phenomenon that you get more email around this time?
Posted: 11/15/2009 9:41:47 PM
Your post just made me think. Isn't it strange with so much pain and emotional drama caused by sour relationships of one sort or another, that more people wouldn't want to be alone? lol
 That Handy Man
Joined: 11/23/2008
Msg: 25 (view)
 
Dress code?
Posted: 11/15/2009 9:14:24 PM
^^^You are right! Sadly, we really have become a nation of SLOBS!

Which actually for a man, looking for a woman is GREAT news,
because it doesn't take much to stand out from the crowd,

And look GREAT!
 That Handy Man
Joined: 11/23/2008
Msg: 11 (view)
 
Dating a Binge Drinker
Posted: 11/15/2009 9:05:14 PM
Sorry, But I can't help but visualize some Ramshackle Cabin at the edge of some swamp, with a crooked, hand painted sign that says "No girls Allowed"

Few people ever ask, or it seems want to know what makes us drink! Many, many people are intensely unhappy, but it's far easier and consoling for society to label them addicts!
 That Handy Man
Joined: 11/23/2008
Msg: 10 (view)
 
How do you know if you should ask a girl out
Posted: 11/15/2009 8:53:04 PM
O.K. I'm feeling kind of generous tonight, so I will give you a second bit of extremely valuable advice.

Don't make the BIGGEST mistake that most men make. They project their interest onto a woman. I like her, so she has to like me back! NO! You MUST learn to look for the signs of HER interest in you! And when you see things that show a lack of interest, don't rationalize these things out of your mind. They are just as valid as her showing interest!

It's hard unless you are face to face, but in person, a woman, has to touch you. Even the slightest tap (intentionally) shows that she is interested! Always look for it!
 That Handy Man
Joined: 11/23/2008
Msg: 9 (view)
 
He ran away...
Posted: 11/15/2009 8:41:27 PM
I think you two ended up in some really deep water too quickly!

Yes, I think in retrospect "vague" might have been good.

I don't think it's nice the way he has behaved, but we all have our weaknesses and faults. You obviously had some intimacy, and it's then hard for almost anyone to say "hey, I'm outta here, have a nice life" so almost everyone just does the old disappearing routine.
 That Handy Man
Joined: 11/23/2008
Msg: 2 (view)
 
Dating a Binge Drinker
Posted: 11/15/2009 8:30:14 PM
It's a trick question! It has to be Jack Daniels and Pepsi! lol

There's your problem!

Face it, few people can handle alcohol well. There are enough things to look out for, never mind getting involved with a drunk. Maybe, he's perfectly fine, but who is going to take that chance? I wouldn't! And, if this place is any indication, no one tells the truth. Occasionally seems more often then not to mean "OFTEN"
Not only that, but there is a real stigma attached to drinking alone!

Gosh, Darn, Now you've gone and made me thirsty!
 That Handy Man
Joined: 11/23/2008
Msg: 3 (view)
 
He ran away...
Posted: 11/15/2009 8:17:25 PM
I too am sorry. Obviously, something made him uncomfortable. I'm not sure. Maybe, he thought you weren't ready for a relationship yet! At first reading your report, it sounded kind of sweet, but upon thinking about it, I think I might be a little weirded out, meeting a woman and mutually grieving over her lost love!
 That Handy Man
Joined: 11/23/2008
Msg: 19 (view)
 
The L Word
Posted: 11/15/2009 7:55:54 PM
Some people are in need of serious help!

Did I mention just plain CREEPY too!
 That Handy Man
Joined: 11/23/2008
Msg: 6 (view)
 
How do you know if you should ask a girl out
Posted: 11/15/2009 7:34:49 PM
Here's just one little clue. Despite how much conversation you have, look for personal questions. They indicate interest. Many women/girls seem willing to spent an inordinate amount of time chatting, but NEVER asking any personal questions! Because, they don't care!
 That Handy Man
Joined: 11/23/2008
Msg: 80 (view)
 
Coupons and Dating
Posted: 11/15/2009 7:24:21 PM
I don't believe in trying to buy a woman's affection or interest. And I certainly am not one to provide entertainment and meals to the multitude of "USERS" out there.

However, it has to be understood that many women, do make judgments on a man in such circumstances. Judgments about his ability to pay, or whether he's a tight wad or cheapskate! On the other hand, a man may show confidence (using his coupons), to the extent that he doesn't care what people (or her) think, and THAT, can be extremely attractive!
 That Handy Man
Joined: 11/23/2008
Msg: 20 (view)
 
Sleep over?
Posted: 11/15/2009 6:58:00 PM
Holly Sheit! I thought you were masquerading as someone else! And close to you too. I am in this VERY position! On the other side! It's a little awkward!

VVVV Means. I am in this same situation, coming up soon!
 That Handy Man
Joined: 11/23/2008
Msg: 14 (view)
 
how to get over it!
Posted: 11/15/2009 6:44:46 PM
I strongly sense that the anger you feel is toward yourself and not him. It's always easier to direct our anger outward! He is, what he is!

There are no victims, only volunteers.

Seek counselling.
 That Handy Man
Joined: 11/23/2008
Msg: 19 (view)
 
Why so many broken promises, broken hearts, broken homes?
Posted: 11/15/2009 6:39:14 PM
The Divorce rate has been fifty percent for the last forty years.

Clearly, people are missing something! I think they need to learn what role nature, genetics and attraction plays in our relationships! Too bad, nothing valuable is ever taught in our educational systems!

I think it's high time that Lawyers stop getting rich over other peoples misery!
Lawyers are doing and have done irreparable and incalculable harm to our society or what's left of it!
 That Handy Man
Joined: 11/23/2008
Msg: 2 (view)
 
Very confused, someone clear me up?
Posted: 11/15/2009 6:26:28 PM
The Cat always gives us away! lol

There MUST have been something in your conversation that caused her to make that assumption. Maybe you worked too quickly!
 That Handy Man
Joined: 11/23/2008
Msg: 6 (view)
 
Any Meaning Behind This -?
Posted: 11/15/2009 6:09:13 PM
Straight and sleek! Shiny and Black? Then it's obvious. There fantasing about the Pantine Provee (or whatever) chick!

Do they drool?
 That Handy Man
Joined: 11/23/2008
Msg: 13 (view)
 
How much doees it take.
Posted: 11/15/2009 6:06:05 PM
I'm sure to some, it really doesn't matter. But then to many, I believe it's honestly one of those things that we tell ourselves (and others) doesn't matter, when it really does but we just don't want to think of ourselves that way!

I really, really don't think it's a mere coincidence that so many really attractive women have successful husbands!
 That Handy Man
Joined: 11/23/2008
Msg: 3 (view)
 
Any Meaning Behind This -?
Posted: 11/15/2009 5:51:21 PM
I didn't look at your profile. If your AMERICAN with the Big Hair Thing happening, I'd be curious to see what's actually in there too! Maybe a whole field office for the CIA!
 That Handy Man
Joined: 11/23/2008
Msg: 11 (view)
 
Would it be judgemental of me...
Posted: 11/15/2009 5:31:59 PM
It's obvious that she just didn't do it for you. So, put it down to a lack of chemistry (I'm sure you have a chemistry set, right). At least she didn't try and stick her tongue in your ear! I just hate when that happens! lol
 That Handy Man
Joined: 11/23/2008
Msg: 15 (view)
 
The L Word
Posted: 11/15/2009 5:23:41 PM
I had a relationship (from here of all places) and it was never really defined either. I on occasion would yell "I love You" just as she was driving away, with her window down, just almost out of ear shot! I just did it to make sure her brake lights were still working (because I cared)! lol
 That Handy Man
Joined: 11/23/2008
Msg: 27 (view)
 
Strange... some behavior I don't understand
Posted: 11/15/2009 4:22:11 PM
All I can say is that you need to learn to read women! Had you known this skill, I'm sure you would have noticed something. Maybe you weren't a challenge??? Maybe you killed any mystery! One or both of those things, will usually be enough to kill their interest pretty quick! Read some forums, about how crazy women get, (can't stop thinking about him) when a guy is aloof! lol The proof is there, almost daily!

Here is another interesting thing. Making another date, when you are on one, dramatically reduces the odds of her being there! Strange but true!

Most guys have no idea how much talking on the phone and texting (between dates), kills attraction, because it kills the mystery that is so crucial in the early stages of a relationship.
 
Show ALL Forums