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 Author Thread: What was the best gift that you received from an SO/husband/date?
 chameleonf
Joined: 12/22/2008
Msg: 38 (view)
 
What was the best gift that you received from an SO/husband/date?
Posted: 2/27/2015 1:05:23 PM

This thread shows just how materiel oriented many are , materiel does not equal love . If some one thinks materiel does equal love . they need to seek mental therapy .

This wasn't a thread about materialism, it was about something that people look back fondly on, largely because of their partners appreciating them and taking the time to show just how much they knew them and have paid attention to their interests or likes/dislikes. It's about realizing no matter how badly things may have possibly ended, there were those wonderful, thoughtful times that brought you together in the first place. It's not about hate and finger pointing, as you are so proud to constantly do, demidar. Have you never in your life received a gift that overwhelmed you with the sincerity of it that had no ulterior motive attached to it than to make you happy? Have you never given one for the same reason?
 chameleonf
Joined: 12/22/2008
Msg: 139 (view)
 
Together forever, no marriage, separate homes, finger up the ass
Posted: 2/27/2015 12:41:58 PM

Humans are users, men and women alike. Lazy, unmotivated, looking for the easy way out.
\
I'd have to preface that with the words "an awful a lot". There are plenty who don't fall into that category but I tend to believe there are more with ulterior motives for wanting to live together than not wanting to live together. I've met men who have made more money than I do but have nothing - not because they were taken to the cleaners by a previous relationship - they just spend everything they make frivolously. At this age you really do have to be cautious, no matter the gender you are, because you can be targeted as someone's meal ticket if they haven't taken care of their own financial security/future.

That aside, I had more years living with someone than not and I've found that I simply prefer living on my own and enjoying the other person outside of financial decisions, household responsibilities, etc. I find I appreciate them more as a person because there's nothing else getting in the way.
 chameleonf
Joined: 12/22/2008
Msg: 93 (view)
 
How well do you know that guy you .........
Posted: 2/27/2015 12:14:11 PM

If a woman doesn’t value her own body, no man ever will.


Really, the same can be said about men - they're not immune by any means.

While I believe that both genders should definitely be as discerning as possible with respect to the health issues surrounding sex, I don't believe in rules as far as time frames for it goes. If you're the type who likes to take your time, fine - likewise if you make quick decisions about it. Some people tie sex strongly to emotions, some less so and it's more of a recreational pleasure. Reasons vary from person to person - it's why we're called individuals. Why is there the need to judge anyone else if their reasons and comfort zones don't align with your own? What actual impact does it have on your own life?
 chameleonf
Joined: 12/22/2008
Msg: 31 (view)
 
What was the best gift that you received from an SO/husband/date?
Posted: 2/27/2015 8:58:18 AM
A new work wardrobe as a Christmas present. He took so much time and put so much thought into putting it all together. I couldn't believe all the combinations and everything fit absolutely perfect.


Don't know about anyone else...but sometimes I need to bring up some GOOD memories of past relationships....More importantly to remember that once upon a time someone loved me enough to think about what would make me happy...


It's an excellent way to move on in life instead of harbouring the unpleasant side of things. I guess that's why we remain friends to this day.
 chameleonf
Joined: 12/22/2008
Msg: 819 (view)
 
are women too fussy
Posted: 2/26/2015 12:25:49 PM

... I think every woman should date another woman to appreciate the incredible mine-field that men have to negotiate when trying to make a good impression.


When it comes to dating, as far as I'm concerned, none of it has to do with men, women, and minefields but far more to do with
trying to make a good impression
.

Wouldn't it be a he11 a lot easier for everyone as an individual, male and female, if they were their true selves right from the get go instead of "trying to impress" the person by being someone other than who they really are, in how they dress, personality, interests and anything else in between? The flip side is people who try to mold others to be who they want them to be because they haven't found what they're looking for yet. Pretense and subterfuge is the enemy. When the "real" persona emerges everyone says, "you've changed". In fact, they have - going from who they weren't to who they really are. Someone like smelly guy would be the real deal, showing himself up front - like him or leave him. I wouldn't like him for that reason alone, but I'd quickly know instead of that side of him showing up after a bunch of time has been invested.
 chameleonf
Joined: 12/22/2008
Msg: 18 (view)
 
Never been in a relationship Or on a date...
Posted: 2/26/2015 9:42:07 AM
I can't see there being a problem at all. As an example, one of my son's friends that he's known since first grade always used to complain that my son always had an easy ability to have girlfriends and he actually started to get depressed about it. It wasn't until he was in his late 20s that he found the girl of his dreams, married her, bought a condo, and a baby daughter arrived in 2014. My son, now 30, still has that easy ability to have girlfriends but would like someone to settle down with and be in the same position as the friend who used to be the depressed one. It's not an age thing or the number of girlfriends you have along the way. You'll work it all out in the end. There are no rules or deadlines.
 chameleonf
Joined: 12/22/2008
Msg: 17 (view)
 
Facebook
Posted: 2/26/2015 8:39:21 AM
There are all kinds of options in the way a person chooses to use Facebook - or not use it at all. What I don't get is why people complain about it when they don't use it based on their own preferences. Gawd...I remember saying when the Internet first came out for public use (because I'm old enough) that it was only good for advertising and now I use it for so many things it's ridiculous. Other people rarely use it at all because they prefer the "old fashioned way" of doing banking, shopping, reading, you name it. I view Facebook the same way. Use it or don't - your choice.
 chameleonf
Joined: 12/22/2008
Msg: 170 (view)
 
Why can't I find what I need/want in a man and relationship?
Posted: 2/26/2015 8:15:53 AM
I think what happens in cases such as yours, OP, is that well meaning people who start out soft in their responses become frustrated because all kinds of sound advice is given, such as getting off the computer and concentrating on life, education and your health, and it's obviously dismissed because of the amount of time that you continue to remain here posting over and over and over again. Your age is brought up because it's true - you are young and on top of it "appear" to have problems that are better solved elsewhere. Your age, again, brings out the big brother, big sister, mother and father in people who are experienced in being each of those and you are being talked to in the same manner as we would talk to anyone of your age who we get frustrated with when they ask for advice and then dismiss it and continue on their merry way, with added attitude. I for one, will repeat my advice - leave the forum for your own wellbeing (not because anyone thinks you're too young - numerically speaking) and others should no longer be enabling your form of posting addiction. This will be the last post I respond to on any of the threads you start and I will ignore any of your posts on anyone else's thread.
 chameleonf
Joined: 12/22/2008
Msg: 273 (view)
 
Severe competition amongst middle-aged ladies at social events. How to get more men OUT to the party
Posted: 2/23/2015 12:30:52 PM
Maybe it's reverse footfetishismology...which might be a fetish all on it's own...a case of some women believing they have such wonderful feet that they long for and/or imagine men are the ones who are all about their feet. I can hear a new song now, "All About the Feet".
 chameleonf
Joined: 12/22/2008
Msg: 103 (view)
 
Why can't I find what I need/want in a man and relationship?
Posted: 2/23/2015 11:45:33 AM

I might just only go on the forums and blank out my profile, I dunno. Ill think about it [...]


I'd suggest she not only blank out her profile but also not go to the forums.


The only thing that could potentially upset her is if she started a thread and nobody replied.


I'd suggest "we" do this ^^^^
 chameleonf
Joined: 12/22/2008
Msg: 743 (view)
 
a funguy who smells like a mushroom
Posted: 2/23/2015 10:47:43 AM

I have to wonder if the story is not a bit exaggerated and some things do not add up but we are waiting to hear the sequel, are we not???. .


We?? I for one couldn't care less. Other than an occasional head shake at some of her posts, seems to me there's far too much dissection of her posts. Maybe some people like to live vicariously??
 chameleonf
Joined: 12/22/2008
Msg: 227 (view)
 
time has taken a toll
Posted: 2/20/2015 5:10:25 PM

You still haven't explained why you give a sh1t about what strangers do on a dating site or in real life that have nothing to do with you.


This isn't directed necessarily to the person who posted the above but after reading this whole thread and so many others, there sure seems to be an awful lot of people giving a sh1t about what strangers do on a dating site or in real life that has nothing to do with them, not only in this thread but dragging said sh1t from thread to thread.

It doesn't matter what age you are - I'm thinking water will seek it's own level maturity-wise which will either leave you a happy camper eventually or the constant author of your own misfortune.
 chameleonf
Joined: 12/22/2008
Msg: 91 (view)
 
Curious: Why are you still here if you have a relationship
Posted: 2/20/2015 7:50:50 AM

I agree with Demidar. If you're in relationship get the heck off the site. Please if you care so much about the people you have befriended on her, why not simply share an email or two off the site. I tend to think if you're here, you're looking. I don't buy the, "just want to correspond with my friends on here." You're still shopping.


How, precisely, does this personally impact you? If you see someone in the forums is in a relationship, they're obviously not someone you're going to be going after and they're just as likely not interested in you as far as a relationship goes. So again, why is it any of your concern? Do you only chat with single people outside of dating sites as well?
 chameleonf
Joined: 12/22/2008
Msg: 39 (view)
 
Not depressed but want to die
Posted: 2/19/2015 1:51:48 PM

April, my Florida friend, please don't introduce another form of mental illness into this young man's life, I beg you. Please. Religion is the absolute root of so many mental health issues.

Just an observation: While I'm a non-believer and while I also don't get off on someone posting scripture and god this and god that, I also find statements such as the above just as offensive when it comes to derailing threads, even those started by trolls that actually have a theme that people carry on to discuss. In keeping with the theme, if one is interested at all in their fellow man's mental well-being, why contribute to anyone's mental anguish on anyone's part by being so inflammatory, or contributing to your own by letting it get to you?
 chameleonf
Joined: 12/22/2008
Msg: 683 (view)
 
raising a stink.
Posted: 2/19/2015 10:32:38 AM

My own observation is that, while my ability to take the truth may be high, others may not share that. The question, of course is, "how much of that has to be a burden on me?" In other words, how much of my tongue should I curb? the answer likely is,"well, how do I feel today?"


I always like the "way" you post gto. I think with a lot of people the truth is according to them and not necessarily the truth in any logical sense of the word. It's a truth with a hidden agenda and isn't even topically germane. You're right though - for most it appears to be how they feel on any given day and with others it's all about keeping some kind imaginary score every day.
 chameleonf
Joined: 12/22/2008
Msg: 30 (view)
 
Not depressed but want to die
Posted: 2/19/2015 8:56:20 AM
While I would agree a psychologist is a good option, I wouldn't necessarily agree that it's the only option or that it shouldn't be used in conjunction with medication. The reason I say this is that my ex has suffered for years with clinical depression caused by an extreme low level of serotonin. All the psychology in the world will not work if the brain chemistry is faulty.

You stated you've taken all kinds of medications before but haven't said you are taking any now. You also didn't indicate if those previous prescriptions were made by run of the mill general practitioners prescribing run of the mill antidepressants. I'd suggest, if you've only seen general practitioners, that you ask for a referral to an actual specialist in neuropsychology or neuropsychocopharmacology.

There's nothing the matter with being an individual who isn't high energy physically or mentally, but the fact is that you feel that you "need" more out of life that you aren't experiencing or you wouldn't have posted about it in the first place. You're not content with the status quo.
 chameleonf
Joined: 12/22/2008
Msg: 155 (view)
 
Anything you post can not be deleted ............................................By tall.
Posted: 2/17/2015 10:39:58 AM

And yes I do want it to die however I am only human, someone pushed my buttons this morning and I couldn't help myself but respond.

Hint...You could help yourself to not respond if you didn't visit said post. Just a thought.
 chameleonf
Joined: 12/22/2008
Msg: 76 (view)
 
can we title the changes?
Posted: 2/16/2015 3:26:55 PM

Three or four older, less attractive women will gang up on their target (usually someone younger and pretty) and make rude, snide, sarcastic comments about her hair, clothes, figure, etc. until the atmosphere becomes unbearable for the lady to stay. Then they'll bat their eyes at the men, and shrug, saying the pretty young woman left because she thought she was "too good" for the group.


I don't think this is something that's unique to just older women targeting someone young and pretty. It happens in the workplace too where it has absolutely nothing to do with attracting men. I've seen it from fat, young women and older pretty women and anything in between. There is always a faction of snarky, cliquey women who are simply insecure and that's their MO wherever they go. They start out in school and their base personality never changes, no matter the situation. Unfortunately, it can cause their targets to grow up feeling insecure in another way that sticks with them for a lifetime and they think every woman is out to get them, even when they aren't.
 chameleonf
Joined: 12/22/2008
Msg: 61 (view)
 
Is Monogamy dead/dying?
Posted: 2/16/2015 3:14:16 PM

Gazer, or OP, you are a grasshopper asking questions and getting answers from the wrong people. Talk to your parents, as you said, they have had a successful 26 year marriage. Talk to others that have had the same experience as your parents. Right now you are getting answers from the divorced, those 30 years older than you and they are basing things on their experience currently and not 30 years ago when they were the same age as you and looking at things through 22 year old eyes.


I'd have to agree with this and the rest of the particular post. If those in their early 20's are seeming to be shying away from monogamy, a large part of it at first has to do with listening to bitter parents who may not be the best people to take advice from and it starts to perpetuate. The best examples to take from are, as Bluemoon says, those who actually are in happy relationships, such as your parents. Others your age may or will come around to finding out that it can be a pretty empty feeling if relationships are seen as conquests, one after the other, whether it be about sex or materialistic.

On the other side of the fence are some incredibly decent people who simply don't feel the need to ever be monogamous or settle down with one person because their life is fulfilled in other ways that doesn't hinge on a lifetime partner. They're more the exception but that's their right. One shoe doesn't fit all...or is that sock around here...
 chameleonf
Joined: 12/22/2008
Msg: 64 (view)
 
Common sense trumps can't see the forest for the trees
Posted: 2/16/2015 9:46:57 AM

This thread was created to yadda yadda blah blah blah


Yes, I'm sure that was apparent to many of the participants of that "other thread". You attempt to tell them in one thread to cease and desist at your imaginary command because the subject(s) didn't like the way they were being painted in some responses, and yet you and your "helper(s)" try to carry it on in another to get a much hoped for different response. At least that was my observation the moment I saw the thread title and the name of the author. Brilliant - NOT.
 chameleonf
Joined: 12/22/2008
Msg: 37 (view)
 
Common sense trumps can't see the forest for the trees
Posted: 2/15/2015 8:16:06 PM
It reminds me of "The Bachelor". I find it disgusting to see the desperation and the real and more often imagined jealousies over a man that the women don't and can't get to know under such artificial circumstances. It smacks more of a popularity contest. I would imagine some men can get an ego boost at such events but the older, more experienced, men who don't like to participate likely have learned to distance themselves from drama laden events and choose to meet women in a less contrived and more natural way, such as mentioned by others.

lol...as for MILFs, they aren't the ones out searching for the younger guys for an ego boost, the actual MILFs get hit on by the younger guys without seeking it. You might be thinking more of Cougars - usually the desperate wanna be MILFs.
 chameleonf
Joined: 12/22/2008
Msg: 312 (view)
 
it's the last word party
Posted: 2/15/2015 7:14:29 PM
The thread actually sounds like a cheap version of the show "Gossip Girls"
 chameleonf
Joined: 12/22/2008
Msg: 402 (view)
 
Does Friends first ever really work?
Posted: 2/14/2015 4:27:25 PM
Ya...I like the way NG broke it down. For those who want to start as friends by meeting online, I suppose they can be in get togethers with their respective friends only for a time until they wish to branch off by themselves to date.

As far as the paying your own share or taking turns paying tabs etc., i"m in a 10 year relationship and that fairness is still applied. I don"t get where once dating or sex enters the picture suddenly it means one person gets to be monetarily taken advantage of.
 chameleonf
Joined: 12/22/2008
Msg: 300 (view)
 
it's the last word party
Posted: 2/14/2015 11:23:31 AM
Vicki, I wouldn't let it bother you re the sock puppet faction, both accusers and actual puppets. There is usually a history between the two, started by hurt feelings somewhere along the line. You got caught in the middle only because there was the "you know who you are" dig at whoever the puppets may be coming directly on the heels of one of your posts, rather than outright accusing anyone by name(s). It generally revolves around flame baiters and the ones who take the bait. When you see the term sock or sock puppet used with any frequency by the same individuals over and over again, it will give you a hint as to who some of the players are and who to avoid in future because of the inherent drama they're both attracted to.
 chameleonf
Joined: 12/22/2008
Msg: 584 (view)
 
Armed pizza robber gets extra topping.
Posted: 2/13/2015 7:44:58 PM
Re 584...go back and read message 365. Sure hope you are never picked for jury duty. With your knee jerk logic, the subject of post 365 would be found guilty of deliberately attempting to murder his penis.
 chameleonf
Joined: 12/22/2008
Msg: 61 (view)
 
How to decipher intentions for relationships?
Posted: 2/13/2015 1:28:43 PM

"In women, oxytocin is released. It's a chemical that makes women want to nurture their young and stay close. Men get a huge jolt of testosterone, which suppresses oxytocin, and that's nature's way of saying, 'Leave the nest and go sire offspring somewhere else.' So when women think they can have sex and walk away just like guys do, they're having to suppress thousands of years of evolution that tells them to cuddle."


lol...except when you're my age and the testosterone overrides the female hormones. There's something to be said for menopause....yippee!!
 chameleonf
Joined: 12/22/2008
Msg: 592 (view)
 
are women too fussy
Posted: 2/13/2015 11:33:10 AM
As far as money/jobs go when it comes to relationships, I have no problem at all with how little or how much a person has or does not have for their "own" comfort zone. What would become a problem is if I had the means to do things that costs a little bit do that we both say we would enjoy doing together and he didn't have the same financial means. It's all well and good to say there are all kinds of things that people can do that cost next to nothing but then that can become one sided if that's all you're able to do.

I'm all about paying my own way but I'm not in a position to constantly pay for two. It then becomes the same issue that men have where they are "expected" to pay a woman's way all the time. For that reason, it IS better if a person looks to find someone within their own income/spending bracket. Unfortunately, you can miss out on a lot of great people because of it, but there's a higher risk of problems being created if it's disregarded totally.
 chameleonf
Joined: 12/22/2008
Msg: 391 (view)
 
Does Friends first ever really work?
Posted: 2/13/2015 11:03:15 AM
Super old post that I'm sure some will say has been done to death but it's always fun to get new perspectives over time, so I'll play.

Friends first is likely meant to indicate that instead of jumping into the sack before finding out if you're even compatible on all kinds of levels is what is desired. It's probably why there are so many breakups - getting tangled up in doomed relationships because of acting mostly on sexual impulses. How can you end up as friends if you don't know if you can even start out as friends? Isn't that kind of like saying, "I'll buy that car because I'll feel good driving it, but I get to moan about it afterwards because it has all kinds of faults I wasn't aware of before I even jumped behind the wheel?" There's a better chance of keeping a long term relationship if you can determine you can be friends from the start, rather than clouding the issue by "only" basing it on sexual compatibility. Sex is relatively easy - friendship takes some figuring out.

Personally, I prefer mixing the two - not one over the other.
 chameleonf
Joined: 12/22/2008
Msg: 8 (view)
 
Why do I always fancy men who I don't have a chance with?
Posted: 2/13/2015 10:01:28 AM

Sometimes the cure is worse than the disease.


...and sometimes understanding the process of the cure makes it easier to deal with.
 chameleonf
Joined: 12/22/2008
Msg: 2 (view)
 
Why do I always fancy men who I don't have a chance with?
Posted: 2/13/2015 8:50:25 AM
You might be well advised to work on your self-confidence and self-esteem before attempting to throw yourself into the hunt for a relationship right now. You have come out of a relationship that requires some damage control on your part and until you can lessen your self-doubts, you will sabotage your chances for happiness with anyone. It's not necessary to immediately throw yourself into another relationship as soon as you get out of one without some inner reflection that helps you ultimately make betters choices for partners, whether they wind up ultimately being older, younger, this-er or that-er. It's difficult for anyone to understand how to connect with themselves before connecting with anyone else, but generally more difficult at your age. Have fun socializing with everyone (men and women) while you get to know yourself, rather than thinking an immediate relationship is the be all and end all.
 chameleonf
Joined: 12/22/2008
Msg: 46 (view)
 
How to decipher intentions for relationships?
Posted: 2/13/2015 8:31:49 AM
Everyone's "driven" by something, whether it's sex, antiquing, baking, mechanics, etc. One just has to be perceptive enough to observe whether what drives another to what degree is compatible with either what you are willing to accept or to enjoy as a pursuit together.

As for men being sex driven, I think they tend to just be more demonstrative/vocal about it, just as women tend to be more demonstrative/vocal about their emotions. It doesn't mean that the river doesn't run deep with respect to either for either gender. There's certainly much more to men then being sex driven. I find most to be extremely multifaceted and just as emotional as women when comfortable enough to express themselves...and women are just as sexual as men when comfortable enough to express themselves. It's the bombardment of either sex or emotions (or antiquing, baking, mechanics, etc.) that can be a turn off for anyone of the opposite gender who doesn't have the same level of interest the same amount of time. That's the trick, as always, to find the right level of compatibility and not assume everyone should totally conform just to please you.
 chameleonf
Joined: 12/22/2008
Msg: 562 (view)
 
are women too fussy
Posted: 2/12/2015 1:40:46 PM

Well, that's one theory I suppose. But there is another one. Maybe there is a sector of the "blame feminism" crowd who once believed that gender equality would mean just that?


How does this statement equate to women being too fussy when it comes to men finding and maintaining a relationship? Are you referring to the courting dance whereby men thought it would mean that women would now do the asking out? If so, that has nothing to do with feminism. Women do and always have, in effect, asked men out by the manner in which they present to the ones they might show interest in. The trick is the men have to be interested in them in the first place as well. That men find any number of women appealing and get spurned by any number of women simply means that there is not an attraction factor.

I'm not seeing an abundance of gorgeous people in my neighbourhood or guys dripping in gold for women to dig. I'm seeing largely averagely attractive people...and yet they seem to have made matches based on qualities other than big bank roles of men or beauty in women. There's no gold to dig and no super model good looks. The matches are made on compatibility in any number of areas.

Feminism is a whole other topic that should have a thread pulled on to debate about. It really has nothing to do with this topic other than being used as a poor justification tool for why some men can't wrap their head around the fact that something about them is off-putting to even the most average of women. It's much like blaming the cop for giving you a ticket when you were the one speeding - you are the cause. Look within and do something different to achieve a different result.

VVV your enlightening philosophies are pretty incredible, Mike!
 chameleonf
Joined: 12/22/2008
Msg: 210 (view)
 
Obama Uses National Prayer Breakfast To Compare Christianity To ISIS
Posted: 2/12/2015 12:59:07 PM

**I sort of get your blind hate for religion,** I am not fond of it myself..but you appear to miss the more fundamental problem of authoritarianism, which would exist with or without religion


It's the pretense that's the pi$$ off. Authoritarians pretending they do what they do in the name of some higher being and use it as a manipulation tool on the sheeple who buy into the pretense. They, in turn, use it to absolve themselves of any wrong doing because their particular religion mandates the poor behaviour. You don't need religion to be bad any more than you need it to be good. It's the blind faith that defies all logic - logic being the key word. If there was no religion, another "threat" would be used on the susceptible in the follow the leader games.
 chameleonf
Joined: 12/22/2008
Msg: 555 (view)
 
are women too fussy
Posted: 2/12/2015 10:07:27 AM

@ chameleonf I've had sex for 6.5 years and I've NEVER been pregnant, I think I know SOMETHING.


I have no idea what precautions you take, but if you believe you can have unprotected sex and won't get pregnant because there is no or very little sperm in pre-ejaculate (it doesn't take tons - it takes one strong swimmer) or you're counting on the pull out method and for the guy to always be in control, you would have been playing Russian Roulette for all of those 6.5 years.
 chameleonf
Joined: 12/22/2008
Msg: 553 (view)
 
are women too fussy
Posted: 2/12/2015 9:46:18 AM
re message 560:

Sorry, but this is where I have to jump all over TWO people who are responsible for a woman getting pregnant.

It's definitely not the man who is getting pregnant and as far as I'm concerned, because it's the woman who does get pregnant, the onus is more on her to ensure that more than one form of protection is being used. I'm sick to death of hearing the old story that the pill didn't work. Both parties should be ensuring that more than one form of contraception is used in order to avoid a pregnancy and if they don't - don't put yourselves in the position of having sex in the first place. Based on the misinformation in message 56o, I'd suggest both genders brush up on sex education.

If women are being "too fussy" then they shouldn't be having sex with someone they don't consider relationship material in the first place and they shouldn't be reproducing until such time as they are in a solid relationship, which includes ensuring that both individuals have the means to take care of a child and not foist that responsibility on society to the degree that they seem to be in such a willy-nilly manner.
 chameleonf
Joined: 12/22/2008
Msg: 525 (view)
 
are women too fussy
Posted: 2/11/2015 5:41:22 PM
The last few male posters have proven the Dems of the world are really the exception and not the rule...very refreshing, even in this cold!
 chameleonf
Joined: 12/22/2008
Msg: 562 (view)
 
Armed pizza robber gets extra topping.
Posted: 2/11/2015 2:38:19 PM

There is Your Socialist Answer, the State is Responsible For Your Welfare...... Cradle to Grave....
You have no Personal Responsibility at All........

Of course individuals have personal responsibility. I've stated that previously. I'm not talking about social assistance handouts. However, the government is largely responsible for mismanagement of the economic social structure which contributes greatly to economic woes of its citizens (job loss/job creation/education/medicare as only a few examples) that, in turn, greatly contributes to crime particularly in the areas of most economic hardship. At the same time, it allows guns to be owned in outrageous numbers in a manner they obviously aren't regulating the use of with any great success.
 chameleonf
Joined: 12/22/2008
Msg: 507 (view)
 
are women too fussy
Posted: 2/11/2015 10:57:34 AM

What do you do? You go on the internet and post radical, anti-women views AND BAM. All the ladies are speaking to YOU.


Great observation. It's the old negative attention is better than none. Unfortunately, it unwittingly makes things even worse - more people to dislike your attitude than you started out with.

The funny thing is that the individuals that you are referring to come from the same era I and some other responders do. These type of men blame feminism that turned the tide for women in a huge way before they were even born and by smaller degrees before they were even old enough to date. Men who are the age of my son can't use the feminism card to explain their lack of relationships, so they attempt to find some other reason, as displayed in this thread. It always seems to be someone else's fault instead of looking inward, which has been stated time and again.
 chameleonf
Joined: 12/22/2008
Msg: 503 (view)
 
are women too fussy
Posted: 2/11/2015 10:19:31 AM

Yikes! Many Canadian women here appear to be extremely cold.

Strictly an observation based on the post referred to and previous posts made by the same individual. If there was no bitterness, anger or closed mindedness displayed, the responses he'd receive would likely be much warmer, no matter from whom or where.
 chameleonf
Joined: 12/22/2008
Msg: 560 (view)
 
Armed pizza robber gets extra topping.
Posted: 2/11/2015 10:11:29 AM

oh, I so hope I get to be killed by a government & not a private citizen

If you live in the States, the likelihood is more from the private citizen, so you wouldn't get your wish. Bad enough people feel the need to blast others outside of their borders, worse still when inside your own with daily statistics being what they are. The internal unrest is more a symptom than a cause of the root problem. The States is inadequately taking care of its own citizens and the reaction is displayed by violence, which just happens to be easier to perform with the availability of guns. The statistics wouldn't be what they are if the perpetrators didn't have the easy access.
 chameleonf
Joined: 12/22/2008
Msg: 498 (view)
 
are women too fussy
Posted: 2/11/2015 9:48:28 AM

This place is so toxic sometimes....

That may well be, but it's also a window into the reason why a number of people can't obtain or sustain lasting relationships.


Ad to him finding an "equal", boy, can't see that happening anytime soon, even I don't know anyone that bitter, angry, closed minded and dumb.


Perhaps the word "dumb" could have been left out so as not to enflame further - otherwise I see the statement as relatively accurate.
 chameleonf
Joined: 12/22/2008
Msg: 493 (view)
 
are women too fussy
Posted: 2/11/2015 9:05:02 AM
@msg 499: I don't recall referring to you, personally, as being unhappy. Nope, looked at my message again and I don't see it. Perhaps before you accuse me of being a mind reader, you might first learn to read, period, and comprehend that which you read.

And now you add that equality in a relationship or equality, period, for men and women is based on dying in combat. I'll see your red herring and raise you the lack of equality by men being unable to birth children. Yup...as you see, one has nothing to do with the other, just as your rant has nothing to do with...well, anything.
 chameleonf
Joined: 12/22/2008
Msg: 487 (view)
 
are women too fussy
Posted: 2/11/2015 8:33:24 AM
It's another wtf demidar moment... Blaming feminists for the OP's dating/relationship problems is like blaming the cessation of slavery for his problems. Men who claim they can't find a partner in life who is worth having never seem to consider the problematic common denominator - themselves.
 chameleonf
Joined: 12/22/2008
Msg: 550 (view)
 
Armed pizza robber gets extra topping.
Posted: 2/10/2015 3:46:15 PM
Sooooo many cases of fire arms not being used for "personal safety". Too many instances such as an easy one picked off the Net for today:

Western Michigan police say an officer and a man who opened fire on police are hospitalized with gunshot wounds. The officers were responding to a domestic dispute in the Grand Rapids suburb Thursday afternoon when a man in his 30s shot one officer. The shooter fled, firing as he ran through the neighborhood. The officers returned fire, striking the suspect. The suspect was seriously injured, under guard in hospital. One of the suspect's shots entered a home and caused very minor injuries to a resident.

Guess that's a well regulated militia according to the constipa..er tution.
 chameleonf
Joined: 12/22/2008
Msg: 464 (view)
 
are women too fussy
Posted: 2/10/2015 1:59:15 PM

I didn't mind being an "experiment," as I was for most of my dates, because they were pretty much normal girls getting such things out of their system...


So, you actually were able to get dates, the problem was keeping them for more than just dates. What is it you perceive about yourself they were "getting out of their system"? Were you told they were getting the (whatever it was) out of their system or did you make something up in your own head when it's actually something about your personality they may not have liked after having been on a date with you? Maybe be open to asking friends or relatives who would give you a straight answer about the turn offs of your personality. That's likely behind more of your problems than women being too fussy. There are all kinds long lasting relationships with various proportions and colours of people so I wouldn't be so quick to peg your exterior as being the major problem - yours or the OP's. Perhaps you're the one being too fussy??
 chameleonf
Joined: 12/22/2008
Msg: 52 (view)
 
Advice on saving for a Car
Posted: 2/10/2015 11:09:25 AM
It's not necessarily what I would encourage my own kids to do but there is the option of "rent to own" vehicles. This depends on how fast you need the car to be able to make more money to be able to outright buy a car. I don't know the types of contracts involved with rent to own but it's an avenue you may wish to look into.
 chameleonf
Joined: 12/22/2008
Msg: 448 (view)
 
are women too fussy
Posted: 2/10/2015 8:22:54 AM
^^^Misogyny alert. Gets the popcorn...lol
 chameleonf
Joined: 12/22/2008
Msg: 425 (view)
 
are women too fussy
Posted: 2/9/2015 4:46:45 PM

probably if they were that "hot" they would already have a home & wheels supplied by an eager Sugar Daddy

...or they may be hot and have their own home and wheels supplied by their own intelligent self-sufficiency, hard work and education. The women who are "only" hot and the Sugar Daddy's who supply them financially is much like water seeking its own level. There is no doubt they each have something to offer one another, but in a vacuous and meaningless sort of way. I'm sure there are some exceptions.
 chameleonf
Joined: 12/22/2008
Msg: 113 (view)
 
Obama Uses National Prayer Breakfast To Compare Christianity To ISIS
Posted: 2/9/2015 3:49:31 PM

The one thing that I have noticed is that Muslims are hesitant to speak out against radicalized Islamist terror...


Apparently not all people care enough to research or listen to what's going on around them in the grander scheme of things and it's why they don't "notice" things. The following may be enlightening:

http://www.beliefnet.com/columnists/commonwordcommonlord/2014/08/think-muslims-havent-condemned-isis-think-again.html#
 chameleonf
Joined: 12/22/2008
Msg: 123 (view)
 
Being friends with the opposite sex.
Posted: 2/9/2015 3:00:19 PM

Opposite sex friends are fine, when they know their place. And their place isn't acting stupid and contaminating your new relationship with disrespect.

This can just as easily be said about same sex friends - ones who know you are in a new relationship and yet they figure you should still have the freedom to act and spend the same amount of time either together or on the phone talking or texting. When men encounter this of their same sex friends, they get harassed as being *****whipped and can create all kinds of problems. Doesn't matter if they're same sex or opposite sex friends. One's who know when to appropriately back off are friends - the others are acquaintances.
 
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