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ProdigalSon81

Joined: 1/18/2009

Msg: 25 (view)

She brought a friend to our date.. Posted: 10/17/2009 12:59:12 PM
Definitely move on from this and if this type of situation comes up again, just say you do mind. If she's really interested in you, she'll reschedule or dump the friend, if not, at least you know and you can find someone who's worth your time.

ProdigalSon81

Joined: 1/18/2009

Msg: 37 (view)

saying to me ever dated a black man? Posted: 10/17/2009 12:31:11 PM
I don't usually ask, don't really care to be honest.

ProdigalSon81

Joined: 1/18/2009

Msg: 36 (view)

Why some people are wanting to move so fast? Posted: 10/17/2009 12:10:13 PM
I'd think you would be glad to find out what a weird person he was, before you met him in person. There are all kinds out there. Most likely if the person is weird, or gives off any vibes of that in a email or phone conversation, obviously you shouldn't meet. But if the emails seem to be going well, why not move things to the phone and then towards the eventual meeting? Rather than dragging things out for months on end only to find out that you guys aren't compatible in person.

ProdigalSon81

Joined: 1/18/2009

Msg: 33 (view)

Why some people are wanting to move so fast? Posted: 10/17/2009 11:33:45 AM
i'm starting to think PoF should stand for 'plenty of flakes'. lotta flakey people so far... Seems that way. I agree with farscapeprincess, if the person is dragging it out and not wanting to meet, it's best to move on and forget it. You can't really develop any sort of chemistry talking with one other via emails and such.

ProdigalSon81

Joined: 1/18/2009

Msg: 25 (view)

I told her i can't just be a friend... but she didnt wanna hear that.. help Posted: 10/16/2009 6:15:48 PM
Just go on with your own life, if you see her around town, be cordial & kind but at the same time don't be a doormat for her when she comes calling to you, talking about how this guy treated her bad, etc. Go date other women, don't preoccupy yourself with her. If the roles were reversed, I'd bet anything she wouldn't want to be JUST friends because she would always be hoping for the day where you see her as something more. It's clear that both of you want different things, so where does it say he's obligated to accept her offer of "friendship"? She has every right to refuse him as a possible boyfriend, and he has every right to refuse her friendship if he's looking for more.

ProdigalSon81

Joined: 1/18/2009

Msg: 20 (view)

losing your phone. Posted: 10/16/2009 12:25:03 PM
If it was me, I'd more than likely think she was playing games or did this for a laugh. Unless our paths cross again and you can explain your situation to him, I don't see him constantly calling you after maybe 1-2 tries, because at some point he's going to realize that from his perspective it sounds like you're not interested. Would you think that something happened to his phone if the roles were reversed?

ProdigalSon81

Joined: 1/18/2009

Msg: 20 (view)

no pic...send one ..no response Posted: 10/16/2009 12:20:15 PM
Welcome to online dating. Rule #1: grow a thick skin. Agreed 100%. If you let something like not getting replies discourage you, you'll probably end up quitting before long. Try not to take it to heart.

ProdigalSon81

Joined: 1/18/2009

Msg: 42 (view)

the odds of POF... STACKED for ladies, discouraging for men Posted: 10/15/2009 1:09:59 PM
I haven't looked at many male profiles, but the female ones are plenty pathetic, too, on the whole. I can't say all of the females' profiles are like that obviously, but some of them are just downright pitiful and lack effort. It's usually 2 lines filled with dating cliches "I like to have fun, etc" and sounds so cookie-cutter and generic, it's hard to start a conversation off of that.

ProdigalSon81

Joined: 1/18/2009

Msg: 14 (view)

Is 3 cats too many? Posted: 10/13/2009 6:58:13 PM
I used to have 2 cats years ago, I don't think it's much at all. If the person likes you and provided they're not allergic or hate cats, it shouldn't be a deterrent.

ProdigalSon81

Joined: 1/18/2009

Msg: 33 (view)

What is the best way to say you arent interested? Posted: 10/13/2009 4:04:36 PM
To the OP, you don't have any reason to feel like crap. I do commend you on taking the time to respond to him, but not everyone takes rejection well. If it looks like the conversation is getting out of control, just block him and don't give it a second thought.

ProdigalSon81

Joined: 1/18/2009

Msg: 82 (view)

Broken Up With For The Strangest Reasons Posted: 10/13/2009 2:20:12 PM
She had her mind made up and I doubt it had anything to do with how much you've traveled. I mean, it's possible, but I just doubt it. She probably found someone else who she felt more in tune with and was looking for some excuse,any excuse to break it off with you.

ProdigalSon81

Joined: 1/18/2009

Msg: 7 (view)

Not interested? Posted: 10/13/2009 12:25:42 PM
It's clear he's gotten your email, so the only thing you can do is either wait or send one more letter. I think it's fair to say now that he's not interested. It's one of things you've got to learn to deal with when participating in online dating. You might think you guys are a match, but the person you're writing to might see it completely different.

ProdigalSon81

Joined: 1/18/2009

Msg: 8 (view)

date a girl who got out of a serious relationship? Posted: 10/13/2009 8:20:22 AM
Provided she's not harping on her ex and showing any signs of still wanting to be with him, then I should think it's ok.

ProdigalSon81

Joined: 1/18/2009

Msg: 16 (view)

Very interested to know... Posted: 10/13/2009 8:11:44 AM
It varies for me also, sometimes it could be 3-4, sometimes just 1-2.

ProdigalSon81

Joined: 1/18/2009

Msg: 16 (view)

How do I make contact with him? Posted: 10/13/2009 7:19:28 AM
I agree with the posters that say try to take this offline and then towards a possible meet.

ProdigalSon81

Joined: 1/18/2009

Msg: 13 (view)

omg!!!!!!!!!! I get in trouble for the littlest things!!! :( Posted: 10/12/2009 6:21:23 PM
She was probably looking for an out and this was it. As mentioned, she was probably messing around with someone else. At least she's someone else's headache now.

ProdigalSon81

Joined: 1/18/2009

Msg: 8 (view)

What should a girl wear on a first date? Posted: 10/12/2009 6:01:52 PM
To be honest, among the things that cross my mind about the first meet, what a girl wears isn't really high on the list. I tend to be more concerned if we hit it off or have any sort of chemistry, etc.

ProdigalSon81

Joined: 1/18/2009

Msg: 11 (view)

Why do men cheat? Posted: 10/12/2009 5:58:40 PM
It's been touched upon already, but it's not just men who cheat, women do it and can be just as heartless about it also. It could be for a variety of reasons.

ProdigalSon81

Joined: 1/18/2009

Msg: 7 (view)

Are my pictures uninteresting? Posted: 10/12/2009 5:17:18 PM
Pictures seem fine to me. Why not get the ball rolling and not just sit around and wait for things to come to you?

ProdigalSon81

Joined: 1/18/2009

Msg: 428 (view)

Is it just me, or are testimonials a turn off ? Posted: 10/12/2009 5:14:06 PM
I like to form my own judgements. Testimonials don't sway me. Same goes for me. You could have three of your friends talk about how great you are, but if we were ever to meet, I could see you completely different than what your friends/colleagues tried to make you sound like. I personally don't take any stock in them.

ProdigalSon81

Joined: 1/18/2009

Msg: 41 (view)

Favorite MMA fighter? Posted: 10/12/2009 4:37:22 PM
Currently, Brock Lesnar. I guess part of that would be because I was a big fan of his when he was in WWE years ago. From the past, Ken Shamrock. Granted his last fights against Ortiz didn't make him look good, but the guy was on top of his game in his prime.

ProdigalSon81

Joined: 1/18/2009

Msg: 5 (view)

He says he'll write, but he hasn't. Now what? Posted: 10/12/2009 3:22:38 PM
You said it yourself, he's just not that into you. Personally I wouldn't get so caught up on someone you barely know. I mean, his profile might paint him in such a great light, but then you might meet up with him and it may be completely different than what you saw online. I think you already know what you want to do, and I'm sure nothing that anyone says here will deter y0u from that. Just make sure you are fully aware that there is a possibility he may not respond or may want to be your friend.

ProdigalSon81

Joined: 1/18/2009

Msg: 3 (view)

Is it me? Posted: 10/12/2009 12:46:45 PM
Maybe they just wanted to see if you really were having a nice day, I dunno. Not everyone has the ability to write out a well-thought letter, so at the very least you answered their questions. It could be worse, they could be writing you calling you all sorts of names because you rejected them. And it's not just men who have this problem either, by the way.

ProdigalSon81

Joined: 1/18/2009

Msg: 7 (view)

Porn -- Relationships Posted: 10/12/2009 9:04:22 AM
^Just curious, evrocks how exactly do you know that to be true? Is there a study out about that or just conjecture?

ProdigalSon81

Joined: 1/18/2009

Msg: 13 (view)

My feelings are very hurt . need some advice,mans perspective. Posted: 10/12/2009 8:37:49 AM
Being tactless aside, he essentially told you the truth in its purest form. Now as said before sometimes the truth can hurt and there's not much really more that you can say to change his way of thinking. It's best not to harp on this and just move onward to someone who'll be more interested in you.

ProdigalSon81

Joined: 1/18/2009

Msg: 19 (view)

Is a cancelled date legit?? Posted: 10/12/2009 6:09:39 AM
Rules? What would they be exactly? Maybe, just maybe the guy really does have car trouble. I know it's hard to believe, but perhaps he's just got lousy luck. If you don't believe him, just end it here and now. Also, why haven't you moved towards talking on the phone? It's just me talking here, but if I'm trying to set up a meeting, I think it's a lot better we converse on the phone, rather than going back and forth with emails and such.

ProdigalSon81

Joined: 1/18/2009

Msg: 20 (view)

So why contact me? Posted: 10/9/2009 6:44:19 AM
Maybe I'm missing something here, but how is ignoring his messages giving him the benefit of the doubt? I'm going to go against the majority here and assume that just maybe, maybe he had something come up at the last minute that was out of his control and would very much like to still meet up with you. I don't think that makes him a bad person. Now, if he does this constantly, then yes there would be room to worry.

ProdigalSon81

Joined: 1/18/2009

Msg: 16 (view)

Sarcasm: Bad vs. Good Posted: 10/5/2009 4:19:38 PM
I like it, but of course like with most things it's better when it's done in moderation.

ProdigalSon81

Joined: 1/18/2009

Msg: 20 (view)

Why some people are wanting to move so fast? Posted: 10/5/2009 10:26:36 AM
Personally I'd rather not go through 2-3 months of emails back and forth only to find out that we're not compatible in person. It's better to find this out as soon as possible, so that way if you guys aren't, you can both move on and not waste each other's time.

ProdigalSon81

Joined: 1/18/2009

Msg: 52 (view)

Why do people actually come on here if they don't ever plan to meet anyone offline? Posted: 10/4/2009 3:32:53 PM
For the ego boost I suppose.

ProdigalSon81

Joined: 1/18/2009

Msg: 72 (view)

The spelling of your / you're in America Posted: 10/3/2009 7:27:04 PM
I also notice a lot of "Should of's" when folks are writing online when they're trying to say should've.

ProdigalSon81

Joined: 1/18/2009

Msg: 19 (view)

Block phone number Posted: 10/3/2009 2:00:32 PM
It wouldn't bother me too much, but I generally tend not to pick up if it says "Unknown" as it could be anyone and I always like to know who's calling me.

ProdigalSon81

Joined: 1/18/2009

Msg: 174 (view)

Dating a Female bodybuilder or girls with big muscles Posted: 9/29/2009 12:06:42 PM
Not really crazy about dating one myself. I don't mind if she's fit and toned, but if they're looking like the guys with muscles everywhere, I'll pass. When I embrace her, it shouldn't feel like hugging an oak tree.

ProdigalSon81

Joined: 1/18/2009

Msg: 2 (view)

What are aggressive girls? Posted: 9/29/2009 11:48:36 AM
It can be interpreted a lot of different ways for different guys. Perhaps she's too pushy or bossy. How do others view you as? Friendly? Approachable? Moody?

ProdigalSon81

Joined: 1/18/2009

Msg: 20 (view)

Why do people actually come on here if they don't ever plan to meet anyone offline? Posted: 9/29/2009 11:47:05 AM
Most likely those people ARE meeting people they have interest in. Don't assume because they aren't meeting you that they aren't meeting anyone. That would be sort of self serving... Quite true, but also there are some who have no intentions of meeting anyone and are content with just keeping it relegated to emails.

ProdigalSon81

Joined: 1/18/2009

Msg: 18 (view)

Why do people actually come on here if they don't ever plan to meet anyone offline? Posted: 9/29/2009 11:19:53 AM
I'd guess it's because they want to just have a penpal or they're too shy or worried about the outcome possibly. I can't say I'm like that, I'm using this as a vehicle for an eventual meeting, if the person for whatever reason isn't into that, it just won't work between us.

ProdigalSon81

Joined: 1/18/2009

Msg: 178 (view)

Rejection-men have been dealing with this a long time. Posted: 9/28/2009 10:07:04 AM
HA ha, so some of you men want to "define" rejection BUT won't allow women to "define" it. So I'm beginning to think that maybe it's all in the definition of rejection! I should think it's rather clear myself. The person doesn't want you or anything to do with you and has let you know this in words or actions. The guy not being aware that you've got the hots for him isn't rejection. He's just unaware, if you make your feelings known to him and he still says no, then that's rejection. I've had instances where a girl was giving me the eye or all sorts of "signals" and such, but to me it'd do a lot more good if you actually conveyed your feelings in words, instead of things that can easily be misinterpreted like a smile or eye-contact as being just friendly and nothing more.

ProdigalSon81

Joined: 1/18/2009

Msg: 173 (view)

Rejection-men have been dealing with this a long time. Posted: 9/28/2009 9:27:58 AM
Women have been dealing with it too.... How many times have you tried to give green light to a man you like, all that eye-contact, welcoming attitude, and he didn't even notice you ? That's not rejection though. It's not like those actions required you to put yourself out there. It also be misconstrued as you just being a relatively nice person, doesn't necessarily mean the guy is going to see it as you're so obviously interested in him. Why not just go up to him and ask him? If he says no, oh well move on. I mean, if we're to believe that men and women are equal, why not help that along by putting yourself out there and not doing the whole "signals" bit with "OMG how does he not see I'm interested in him, I twirled my hair three times and pointed my left index finger at him".

ProdigalSon81

Joined: 1/18/2009

Msg: 102 (view)

She asked for money at the end of the date! Posted: 9/25/2009 2:51:35 PM
I remember a few years back I had a girl ask me for money the day before our date, she called me and asked for $100 to get her hair done. I refused and she said "What's wrong? Don't you want your date to look nice for you?". I just said that it wasn't going to work out and hung up, it was the last I heard from her. If you find that she's trying to shake you down for some cash, don't be afraid to say no. If she was worth anything, money wouldn't be an issue, especially if you guys barely know one another.

ProdigalSon81

Joined: 1/18/2009

Msg: 47 (view)

Giving up due to complete waste of time Posted: 9/25/2009 1:24:12 PM
Now you've really stirred up the hogs nest I always thought it was a hornet's nest? Sometimes it can be a bit demoralizing, especially for guys who consistently email and get nothing in terms of responses. The only thing I can say is try not to take it so seriously and don't use this as your only means of meeting people otherwise you'll get frustrated real quick.

ProdigalSon81

Joined: 1/18/2009

Msg: 14 (view)

If I don't respond right away, men don't write back Posted: 9/25/2009 5:17:53 AM
I'd say it could be any one of those 4, and unless he tells you, there's no way of knowing for sure which. For me, I usually write a lady and if I just see "Read/Unread" and it's like that for a few days, I tend to believe she's not interested for one reason or another and so I move on to the next one. She could be busy like you've mentioned or just playing hard to get or just plain not interested. I can't really afford to wait around for days and days for someone to answer my email when I could pursue someone else who'll answer in less time. Perhaps it's better to find someone off-line in your case.

ProdigalSon81

Joined: 1/18/2009

Msg: 124 (view)

She threw my car into park... Posted: 9/24/2009 11:08:07 AM
In any event, she was a nutjob from the word go and glad you didn't cave in and buy her the shirt as that would've opened the floodgates for her to bleed you dry. afashionlady summed it up well on the first page, she could have your job as all she has to say is sexual harassment and you'll be on the outside looking in. Relationships in the workplace don't work most of the time, so I'd tread carefully in future if I were you.

ProdigalSon81

Joined: 1/18/2009

Msg: 28 (view)

Finally thought she loved me agian...only to have my heart ripped out and shit on then thrown away Posted: 9/23/2009 4:50:05 AM
Even if they don't sound nice, the messages do have a ring of truth in them. There's a reason why she was an ex, you were the proverbial book on a shelf, she dusted you off, read you for a bit and discarded you. You shouldn't ever let yourself get to the point where you let anyone have power over you to where you would kill yourself. She's just not worth it, if she calls again in future, leave her be.

ProdigalSon81

Joined: 1/18/2009

Msg: 23 (view)

Can you handle me? Posted: 9/19/2009 12:59:31 PM
I've definitely seen those quotes on various women's profiles also. I guess it makes the person feel big to say that as if they're some type of prize or something.

ProdigalSon81

Joined: 1/18/2009

Msg: 56 (view)

I find this site disheartening.... Posted: 9/17/2009 11:16:24 AM
I haven't read all the posts, but I'd say it's usually because people are far more picky online than they are in person. It's difficult to sell yourself as opposed to in person where you can interact right there and then, and the person can gauge how you are, your personality,etc.

ProdigalSon81

Joined: 1/18/2009

Msg: 10 (view)

Why do men cease contact here after 4 or 5 great email exchanges? Posted: 9/15/2009 11:01:13 AM
It's commonplace around these parts to see someone dissapear after a few emails with no rhyme or reason. More than likely they found someone better or had their own issues to sort out. In either case, it's best not to take it to heart.

ProdigalSon81

Joined: 1/18/2009

Msg: 35 (view)

Dating a sports fan? Posted: 9/15/2009 4:57:06 AM
Nothing wrong with liking sports, it's when it's in excess when it gets to be a problem. I watch sports also, but I don't put it aside for my friends or family. Everything done in moderation.

ProdigalSon81

Joined: 1/18/2009

Msg: 2 (view)

why don't guys call when they give out their number Posted: 9/14/2009 6:13:52 PM
If you know to move on, then you ought to. It's not really indicative of how every guy is. He just wasn't that into you.

ProdigalSon81

Joined: 1/18/2009

Msg: 44 (view)

Why Plenty of Fish? Posted: 9/14/2009 1:10:17 PM
I'd say I'm on here because like others it's free. Places like singlesnet which is a haven for scammers from my experiences doesn't really keep my interest. I like it here and on OKC as there are the forums to converse with others.

ProdigalSon81

Joined: 1/18/2009

Msg: 2596 (view)

Internet dating: sucks for guys, good for women. Posted: 9/14/2009 12:44:30 PM
I saw a profile of a woman that lives in my area and all she had written up was "Just ask" repeated over and over ad nauseum. At a guess, she probably got a whole inbox filled with emails and if a guy did it, he may as well close down shop because that's essentially online dating suicide because no woman would even give him a second look, or a first one for that matter. It's probably best to use this as another outlet for meeting people, just don't rely too much upon it or you'll be discouraged rather quickly with the lack of responses/flaky people.

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