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 Author Thread: single mom and the sex talk.....
 MrPatient1101
Joined: 2/9/2009
Msg: 54 (view)
 
single mom and the sex talk.....
Posted: 7/2/2009 12:20:09 AM
I wonder Mr. Patient and any other men out there...did your dads talk to you about this when you were growing up?


In regards to masturbation, no. Every boy can figure out how to that by themselves. Gawd the horror of my mother/father talking to me about it!!! I dont even want to think about it.

As far as the sex/babies/safe sex talk... yes I had that talk when I was 12

Masturbation isnt something you have to worry about.. what harm could become of a boy masturbating?? something in the eye maybe LOL
 MrPatient1101
Joined: 2/9/2009
Msg: 32 (view)
 
single mom and the sex talk.....
Posted: 6/29/2009 9:00:02 PM
If its masturbation your talking about.. you dont need to have a talk with him. Thats just not something a mom needs to talk to her son about. That will definetly not make him comfortable. Just let that go. When he starts talking about girlfriends, have the std and safe sex talk. Thats all you need to do
 MrPatient1101
Joined: 2/9/2009
Msg: 136 (view)
 
And so God said...........
Posted: 6/29/2009 9:12:56 AM

It is only pointless because you refuse to accept your own words.


Close but not really. Its pointless because YOU view love as a transaction and I do not. That is it entirely. There is no hidden meaning, no secret code. Its just as it is, My view and Your view. Its not that im not willing to accept what you say, I just look at love differently. That is all.. no more no less
 MrPatient1101
Joined: 2/9/2009
Msg: 124 (view)
 
And so God said...........
Posted: 6/29/2009 6:37:54 AM
Well actually Jim, I had neither of those thoughts when I found out I had a 2 week old son in the hospital having brain surgery. Thats when I found out I was a father so I can assure you it was selfless in the fact that didnt EXPECT ANYTHING. I prayed that he would make it out of surgery alive. No alterior motives jim.. pure unconditional love.

The joy my parents get is that they are doing something they LOVE jim. They LOVE to protect/serve. Why is that so hard to comprehend?

Anyways, this is a pointless argument. You will no doubt stick to your guns ( no jim im not accusing of you having a gun ) and I will surely stick to mine. You say love is a "transaction" I say its something else. If you love someone only because you are getting loved in return then its not really love at all is it?
 MrPatient1101
Joined: 2/9/2009
Msg: 10 (view)
 
Am I beating my head on a brick wall??
Posted: 6/28/2009 8:01:35 PM
I know this woman is busy and I accept that fact. She also says shes interested but isnt sure she wants a relationship. That ok as well, but all I ask is that if she is interested.. show it. Im tired of 1 way streets...tired of being the "friend" and although I am ok with this I cant help but feel impatient! ugh im losing my mind I think lmao

 MrPatient1101
Joined: 2/9/2009
Msg: 8 (view)
 
one sided communication
Posted: 6/28/2009 7:07:47 PM
Ugh, I dont understand why all these women who actually make contact never meet a guy who LIKES it. I would love for a woman to show interest in me, sent me sweet lil nothing txts throughout the day. Actually have something reciprocated for a change!!
 MrPatient1101
Joined: 2/9/2009
Msg: 1 (view)
 
Am I beating my head on a brick wall??
Posted: 6/28/2009 6:52:27 PM
Ok so I started talking to this woman on here. The conversations were great and funny and we moved to IM's on yahoo. I gave her my number that night and she called me, seemed as though everything was great. Then, the conversations went from daily to me sending txts and not getting replies.

I have no problem with being upfront and asking, so i asked what the deal was. She had told me that she was sorry and she just has a bad habbit of not getting back to people. I then asked what she was really looking for and she said that she really didnt know. I told her I had no problems with just being friends first and that I was interested in her past friendship.

I send txts here and there, Ive been busy doing home improvement projects this week and have been sharing the progress with her via picture messages through the phone. Sent her pictures of me prior and would get "Yummy" and "Mmmmm" replies.

She also sends me pictures, and to me Im just a little confused as to what the heck is going on. Prior to the home improvement week (lol) I sent a txt and didnt get a reply so I didnt send anything for another 2 days. Im trying to give space and not make her feel pressured. We havent met in person nor have we set up a date due to my current situation ( im unemployed atm and gonna go back to school) We talked today via txts and after the last one I sent, no reply. No biggie, space ... I get it? :) So I hop on yahoo and notice she has a status message "Men!!!!!"

I cant help but wonder if I'm wasting my time?? Is she trying to make me make the decision to move on so she dosent have to own up to saying it? Am I overanalyzing ? I'll admit im a lil softie ( I have a big heart ) so maybe that will help you in your advice.

Thanks Ladies!
 MrPatient1101
Joined: 2/9/2009
Msg: 113 (view)
 
And so God said...........
Posted: 6/28/2009 5:25:56 PM
Reading without understanding what is being said is what is absurd here. You failed.


Old and bitter is what comes to mind jim. Cheer up!! I didnt insult you in any way so why do you feel the need to do so?

Fighting tooth and nail is an metaphore... here let me help you

Reading without understanding what is being said is what is absurd here. You failed.


Do you think I assume my parents think this? I have asked.. that is what they said.


If you had bothered to peek at my profile you'd know the answer to that. And having children was a conscious choice on my part. I decided that I WANTED to be a parent before I ever became one for my own reasons. Once that child was conceived my "requirement" for the trade was fulfilled and I have got something back from her every single second she's been alive.


Sorry, I was so appauled that you think "people love there kids because of what they get out of it" I didnt bother to check if you have kids. Honestly, im even more appauled that you say your "requirement" after having concieved said child is fulfilled is quite disturbing. You may get joy from your child but you certainly didnt concieve your child so that you could get something back from her. If so.. god help you.

Aside from that this is a forum and if you cant handle said "philosophical debate" without dishing out some insults maybe you should take a break.

Sorry that the woman you were seeing left over this thread, dosen't give you the right to lash out though. Thanks for your time


Violet,


I didn't know love came with preconceived conditions


Saying love is a transaction is exactly this statement no?
 MrPatient1101
Joined: 2/9/2009
Msg: 110 (view)
 
And so God said...........
Posted: 6/28/2009 3:48:23 PM
I have to say that reading these posts made me smile and made me sad.
Love is love no matter what and trying to relate it to a transaction is obsurd.

Parent/child bond = LOVE!! Do you even have kids Jim?

My parents are cops and they LOVE their job. They LOVE protecting people. Iit is a LOVING nature to protect and serve, not just a paycheck. again jim??

My son is special needs and do you know how many nurses know me and my son by name? Do you know how many nurses off duty come and see my almost 4yr. old son when he has a surgery? They LOVE him without any expectations to recieve it back. Jim??

When I let someone go ahead of me in line at the grocery store, I certainly dont do it to recieve anything in trade. The only thing I get is a longer wait. That act of kindness is love indeed. Jim??

I think some may be confusing being "in love with someone" to actual unconditional love in itself whole heartedly.

P.S. Sorry to focus on Jim, it was the only name fighting tooth and nail to prove "love" has a trading value.
 MrPatient1101
Joined: 2/9/2009
Msg: 10 (view)
 
For girls dating another girl....
Posted: 6/28/2009 3:01:10 PM
i hate guys who treat women like your ex treated you. Seriously, that crap get old and im TIRED of having to prove myself because of a situation like this. Its unfair to start with a handicap when trying to date. Do me a favor tho, dont put me in a box with the rest of the jerks
 MrPatient1101
Joined: 2/9/2009
Msg: 537 (view)
 
Do Women really avoid Scorpio's???
Posted: 6/28/2009 2:53:32 PM
Im a scorpio and I must say whenever a girl asks me what my sign is and I say Scorpio, I get a reaction thats puzzling to me. I have to admot though the passionate, sex driven, jealous part is true. Now before we delve into this jealousy thing let me explain. Every man/woman has a little sense of jealousy (and you know what I mean) but its all in how you handle it. With that said, Im not secretive at all. I will tell you anything you would like to know about me.

Oh so passionate though.. I put it behind everything I do. Freaky in bed, definetly guilty of it hahah
 MrPatient1101
Joined: 2/9/2009
Msg: 56 (view)
 
Most rejections stem from what is NOT in her profile...
Posted: 6/28/2009 2:12:28 PM
ALL of you women I email better love me or else I will go off to my room stomping my feet along the way.


Like a little kid. How about asking the ladies to look at your profile and give some advice in the profile review section first.

Yes ALMOST everyone (90%) male or female has been hurt in past relationships.

Stop pointing the blame and start looking in the mirror. It is instinct to wonder "what the hell am I doing wrong" when your single and trying to date with no success (this applies to men and women).

Unless your so stuffed up your own a$$ that you cant breathe fresh air and see what it tastes like. This is typically the outcome
 MrPatient1101
Joined: 2/9/2009
Msg: 32 (view)
 
Why is our ability to cook/clean so important to men?
Posted: 6/28/2009 1:37:54 PM
I just dont see why some men are like this. It cracks me up. I personally love cooking, especially for someone I like. It makes me feel good when they say "omg that was soooo good" Cleaning I can do also, I prefer to wash the clothes but I HATE folding/putting them away lol I hate vacuuming but like doing kitchen stuff. Dont mind cleaning the bathroom either. What ever happened to honey-do lists?? I miss those
 MrPatient1101
Joined: 2/9/2009
Msg: 60 (view)
 
The Six Biggest Dating Mistakes Women Make
Posted: 6/27/2009 3:41:24 PM
Gnosis Sublime!! That list rocks hahah.. Sorry to say ladies most of that is true.
 MrPatient1101
Joined: 2/9/2009
Msg: 33 (view)
 
Why do they all pull away?
Posted: 6/27/2009 3:19:33 PM

2. Are you dating stinking civilians who don't understand our quaint Military ways , which we do tend to carry into our personal relations? errr *cough* so I understand



Your joking right?? LMAO @ this. I was in the marines and work was left at work. Homelife was left at home. If YOU as a person (male or female) cannot seperate the 2 then you shouldnt be trying to commit unless its to another person in the armed services. Give me a break pal.

On a side note. I dont think the army would appreciate you wearing your camo on a dating website. You should know better!

Somewhere in here I seen a woman say men dont like strong women?? Come now let us start using the term "some" or something along those lines. I like strong women.

Also, I seen somewhere that someone say that men like ****y women. Refer to the above statement please. Keep the ****es where they belong - in heat

Anyways, back to the OP -- sometimes military life and dating can be difficult. Trust me I know. 1 failed marriage while I was in the marines left a sour taste in my mouth.

There HAS to be something that we are missing. If all is so well why are these men leaving.


You mention relationships being fun and easy up till then, do you suddenly crank it up a gear?


This is my question.
 MrPatient1101
Joined: 2/9/2009
Msg: 48 (view)
 
Men/Women Please dont make this mistake...
Posted: 6/25/2009 12:04:08 PM

yes, some people are just socially inept and don't know how to give a compliment.


Couldnt have said it better myself.
 MrPatient1101
Joined: 2/9/2009
Msg: 18 (view)
 
in love but no future
Posted: 6/25/2009 11:46:59 AM
Well said Sverin. I think the "idea" of marriage is family and happiness when all the while you can have those things without marriage.

Marriage is a sacred thing that is taken too lightly now a days. Honestly though, its just a piece of paper that states what you you already know. You love him, your happy, your committed.

This is a tough choice that you alone will have to make. The advice given here should just be used as a refrence, not taken literally. If you want children and your sure its with him then start there. ( asking if he would have more children) There are only 2 choices in the end that will be available to you IMO.

Stay or Leave
 MrPatient1101
Joined: 2/9/2009
Msg: 15 (view)
 
Falling Fast For Friends and Fading
Posted: 6/25/2009 11:37:15 AM

I guess the shitty part is that I'm too much of a softie to accept losing her as a friend, yet I want her to be so much more. It's a total Catch-22. If I tell her and go for it, I'd likely lose her. If I don't, I get an ulcer. At this point, I just need some freaking rolaids.


Cheers to that

P.S. Tums are better!
 MrPatient1101
Joined: 2/9/2009
Msg: 10 (view)
 
Why do they all pull away?
Posted: 6/25/2009 11:31:16 AM

But have you ever noticed that you start changing your routine to accommodate his? Skip your time at the gym or going to the beach with your friends, not intentionally feeling clingy, just lovin' to spend time with your guy. (but this gives the impression that you're needy). Or you go out of your way to prepare a nice meal or establish a regular routine of doing so, again giving of yourself to invest in a meaningful relationship


Why cant I meet a woman like this LOL
 MrPatient1101
Joined: 2/9/2009
Msg: 7 (view)
 
Is this a game, or interest?
Posted: 6/25/2009 11:24:07 AM
You should approach her however you feel comfortable doing. Lets be honest tho Severin. You are FEELING that way correct? There should be no reason to sugarcoat it.

If you must... Ask her where you see this going. I mean there is no real way to ask this other than flat out asking her.



"You know we've had some great times together and I was just wondering where you think this is going?"

Let her answer, then if she returns the question. Tell her how you feel.. or "think"
 MrPatient1101
Joined: 2/9/2009
Msg: 90 (view)
 
I'm not attracted to you
Posted: 6/25/2009 11:09:32 AM
now that this thread is long gone and so was the date you had. In my opinion, he was just mad you said no about the 2nd date and wanted to make you feel like you made him feel. Simple really.

On a side note, I find you attractive Hope everything went well!!
 MrPatient1101
Joined: 2/9/2009
Msg: 12 (view)
 
Falling Fast For Friends and Fading
Posted: 6/25/2009 11:04:32 AM
back to the topic at hand!! LOL sheesh
 MrPatient1101
Joined: 2/9/2009
Msg: 5 (view)
 
Is this a game, or interest?
Posted: 6/25/2009 11:03:23 AM
Theres only one way to find out. I know its only been 3 weeks but if you feeling that way then I dont see why expressing it should be a problem. If its a problem for her then maybe your not right for each other.

On a side note.. if she hasnt dated in a year then maybe shes being cautious. maybe shes having the same feelings and instead of letting them lose she is holding back to not scare you away. I think a nice talk would do the both of you justice. Go get'em tiger!!
 MrPatient1101
Joined: 2/9/2009
Msg: 2 (view)
 
Is this a game, or interest?
Posted: 6/25/2009 10:53:16 AM
wow, that is definetly a lot to saok in. I dont have any thoughts on her intentions as Im not you and havent spent the time with her. Two things come to mind however.

1. have you told her how your feeling and asked what is going on in her head?? If your answer is no then do exactly that. Find out, ask her. If she acts like your overstepping then i think your answer is clear.

2. Maybe she wa a little mad at the fact that she cancelled plans for you and you wouldnt do the same? This is is just an assumption so you might not want to assume this as we all know what happens when you assume.

Hope this helped, best of luck and hope things go well with you 2. Sounds like you're haveing a blast together
 MrPatient1101
Joined: 2/9/2009
Msg: 30 (view)
 
Jealous Of A Dog?
Posted: 6/25/2009 10:45:38 AM
LOL -- If I was that guy I would have swooned your dog ROFL. The dog would have its head in my lap and you would have had to fight for the space.

On a more serious note. I guess it depends on how the situation was. If we were watching a movie and the dog came between me cuddling with my woman.. the dog would go off the couch and i would be cuddling with my woman. I dont know you or how this played out but it sounds like the guy just wanted the attention that you no doubt gave the dog instead.
 MrPatient1101
Joined: 2/9/2009
Msg: 8 (view)
 
Falling Fast For Friends and Fading
Posted: 6/25/2009 10:27:48 AM

So, for the umpteenth time, I've fallen for a friend. I can't really explain why this keeps happening but it does.


Ugh, this happens to me every time. (well not every time ) I just dont get it either. The common phrase I hear is "Im not sure what I want" or "I just want to be friends". I take that in and say, thats fine.. we can be friends and if things change let me know. However my feelings say different, Im stuck.. still doing the small things for this "friend" like. Saying in a txt "good morning sunshine" or expressing myself otherwise. Even when its not returned... I cant seem to draw myself away. We always want what we cant have and damn is it true. The most recent one tells me that she finds me attractive and funny.. im a great guy etc. but never returns a txt, or phone call. Hell, she hasnt even initiated contact first. I.E. I always have to initiate the conversation first "Hey, whats up?" in a txt. Am I wasting my time? Do I need more backbone? Am I a pushover? These are things I ask myself all the time and I cant help but feel.. Why should I have to change who I am? I guess I'm just tired of hearing im a great guy, attractive and then getting nothing from it but a compliment. So frustrating ...
 MrPatient1101
Joined: 2/9/2009
Msg: 58 (view)
 
The Six Biggest Dating Mistakes Women Make
Posted: 6/24/2009 5:14:58 PM

What you call settling I call considering your other options. In my opinion settling is going for someone below your standards. I'm not even sure what you are arguing here, are you saying that you shouldn't go for other women if your first option is not interested? Or are you arguing that anybody besides your first choice is settling?


Im stating in the case you mentioned, if your first choice is not interested you go for the one who gives you attention / acts interested in you. Look at it like this if you will. Why did you go over to the group in the first place? For the one that interested you correct? So when this woman does not return the interest you talk to the one who does right? Your going for something less (for lack of better words) than what caught your interest in the first place. Thus you are settling for less. So when option A isnt available you go ahead and get option B. When your store is out of a type of cigarettes / beer that you normally drink / smoke do you go to another store for what you like or do you settle for the brand you wouldnt normally get? Thats settling, which is what you described. Make sense?
 MrPatient1101
Joined: 2/9/2009
Msg: 55 (view)
 
The Six Biggest Dating Mistakes Women Make
Posted: 6/24/2009 2:46:57 PM

Oh jeez, this one of the biggest and most common mistake guys make. It's not called settling, its called being realistic in the fact that every woman you approach isn't going to be interested for whatever reason and you need to keep your options open by talking to a lot of women. This includes her friends. And this IS dating advice, as you need to woman to be interested in you to be able to get a date.


Common mistake?? It is called settling.. maybe you should be "realistic" enough to realize that. Yes every woman that you are interested in will not be interested in you. If your saying "if shes not interested in me ill go for her friends" YOU are SETTLING.. that is the realistic fact about what you said. Its like fishing so to speak.. your out looking for salmon but instead you settle for the catfish. You will no doubt be unhappy with the taste and texture.
 MrPatient1101
Joined: 2/9/2009
Msg: 71 (view)
 
Men's behavior after sex
Posted: 6/24/2009 9:41:26 AM
Indeed.. more and more dating seems to be a game. I honestly cant stand it. I lay my cards out on the table, I want a long term relationship. I tell that to any woman that I talk too. It never works out for me but I dont believe in hiding anything so, I guess you just gotta keep on keeping on!
 MrPatient1101
Joined: 2/9/2009
Msg: 59 (view)
 
Men's behavior after sex
Posted: 6/23/2009 9:56:38 PM
This thread is starting to get outta hand. Even i have gotten sucked in to voicing my opinion rather than answering the OP.

Dating is never easy FOR ANYONE .. expierenced in it or not. I think i have a mindfull enough of expierence dating but I still cant figure women out. Its tough, it can be brutal, and hurtfull. Some of the things in this thread are helpfull while others are not. It should all boil down to this tho -- YOU do what YOU feel is right when YOU are ready.. not when someone else says too. If you feel a connection on the first date and want to sleep with them.. then do it. As the 2 gentlemen prior to this post said -- they had WONDERFUL relationships and marriages. Im sure there are some women who can vouch for that as well. If you want to make a man wait 90 days then do it... if you want to go on 7 dates with 7 different guys in 1 week.. then do it. Its YOUR choice, you will do what you feel is right anyways.. wont you??

We cant force our "standards" on anyone and shouldnt. We can only offer our help / shoulder to lean on.
 MrPatient1101
Joined: 2/9/2009
Msg: 51 (view)
 
Men's behavior after sex
Posted: 6/23/2009 1:50:25 PM

This is so funny. MrPatient? cute name for a man that won't wait....wouldn't you say? this post wasn't about what i would/have done, it was and still is about a woman asking about men's behavior after sex. i don't believe she was wanting a one nite stand....and i'm not talking about that either.....sure if that's what you want, go for it.....but i don't think she would be wondering what happened if she would have waited to have sex with him......
And at my age....i am wise enough to know, there are still man out there that won't wait.. the key is for woman to realize if all they want is sex, there are a lot of places they can get it, WE are worth more than that........


If you read my very first post .. you would see why I said what I did. All im saying is that if a man just wants sex and you make him wait.. he still just wants sex. So no matter the timeframe that you feel your "worth" is at its not going to change a mans motives.
 MrPatient1101
Joined: 2/9/2009
Msg: 53 (view)
 
The Six Biggest Dating Mistakes Women Make
Posted: 6/22/2009 4:47:47 PM

Of course not everybody feels this way but I was just stating what I am comfortable with and it seems like women response well when you talk to everybody in the group for the most part. If you are smooth enough often times they start competing for your attention so its win/win since women like the competition. I will know my interests level and her interests level both by how much I want to talk to her and how much she wants to talk to me over her friends.

In fact it's a very good way to judge non-interest. Sometime I'll approach a group of 4 or so women, only be interested in one of them yet the one I'm interested in is giving me the least attention. Good thing I chatted up all the women in this case right? As least now I have 3 other women to talk to and going for just one that wasn't interested in me in the first place.


Just an observation. It seems to me that if you cant get the woman that initially interested you enough to walk into the lioness's den that you "settle". This is surely a tactic / game and to me it seems your just out to get laid. So why are you trying to give dating advice?
 MrPatient1101
Joined: 2/9/2009
Msg: 47 (view)
 
Men's behavior after sex
Posted: 6/22/2009 4:42:04 PM
LMAO Kid A -- OMG i dont wanna read that EVER again lmmfao -- Maybe freedom should try to make that guy wait 90 days.
 MrPatient1101
Joined: 2/9/2009
Msg: 46 (view)
 
Men's behavior after sex
Posted: 6/22/2009 4:40:56 PM
freedom1969

Come on now you should be wise enough at your age to know that statement is completely idiotic. I understand the older you get the less you want sex. At least that seems to be the common gripe between SOME men and women. Waiting 90days?? LOL I wouldnt wait 90 days and im actually a nice guy. Ask any woman that has chatted with me on here and they would tell you. I cant believe you would actually try and promote this to other women!!! Thats the problem now a days is that too many women ( i didnt say all) seem to think that keeping a chastity belt on and throwing away the key is the secret to finding a nice guy. YOU are highly mistaken and any women who takes this advice should..i wont go there. My point is this

YOU AS WOMEN SHOULD MAKE YOUR OWN CHOICES. Have no regrets! If you want to have sex on a first date than so be it. It dosent mean it wont/cant be a meaningful relationship. Only YOU can stop it from being just that. If you want to wait 90 days then do so.. but i can tell you that you will be going through a lot of D batteries because no man in their right mind is going to think your poon is THAT special. Sex is just NOT as emotionally attached as it is to a woman then it is a man. ( some not all ) Ugh.. when are some of you women gonna stop holding the pu**y on a pedestool.
 MrPatient1101
Joined: 2/9/2009
Msg: 7 (view)
 
Where is the effort at??
Posted: 6/21/2009 10:39:23 PM

Internet dating sites are largely a joke and not a real way to meet women for reasons I don't even want to bother getting into. Don't expect to get replies from women and don't expect a lot of women to contact you first, and definately don't expect quality messages. Use this site as kind of a passive effort to get women but don't put a lot of effort into it yourself because the return on investment is horrible. Pick up women IRL instead.


Thats a positive attitude lol I'm new to this site and cant say what I think about the internet dating just yet. You on the otherhand seem like youve had some bad expierences. Sorry about that.
 MrPatient1101
Joined: 2/9/2009
Msg: 31 (view)
 
Men's behavior after sex
Posted: 6/21/2009 10:30:01 PM

This is simple: For many men, once our seed is spilled, so is our passion. Our passion escapes our bodies along with our sperm. You ladies can recharge and reload, having mutliple orgasms, mini-orgasms, pre-shocks and after-shocks on a moment's notice. We fellas have to build it back up again. Don't take it personally, he just had nothing left to give ya. Maybe in a week he'll be reloaded and horny again.


You are definetly not helping men. So please before you go sputtering some ignorant paragraph such as you did here.... Stop, think, and rethink before you let your fingers say something really stupid.

Passion escapes our bodies? I bet your one of those men who only wants sex 1x a week lol. What does a woman being able to have multiple orgasm's etc. have ANYTHING to do with what the OP had asked. You are old enough to tell the difference between passion and lust. Why are you relating sperm to passion.. you have got to be out of your mind. I have to say I never laughed so hard before but this is just plain ignorant. This man needs
 MrPatient1101
Joined: 2/9/2009
Msg: 26 (view)
 
Men's behavior after sex
Posted: 6/21/2009 7:01:34 PM

A mans goal is to get into your pants be it on date 1 or date 20 that is his goal. Once he does he either likes you or he doesn't the amount of time is not going to change that


Your joking right? I have to say that this is the most appauling statement in this thread. Almost as appauling as treating sex like dangling a carrot in front of a horses mouth.

Are some of you women old and young really that dense and THINK that this is even true? I'll agree that men treat initial attraction differently than women but thats about as far as it goes. Not all guys just want sex.. it is YOUR job as a woman to try and find that out. Its not fair that women treat sex like leverage.. if he waits x amount of weeks then hes worth it. Are you stupid?? That man could be having sex with other women while your trying to make him wait. Then you have sex with him and go WTF hes not calling. It dosent matter how long you make a man wait. If he wants in and out -- he will do in and out no matter the time.

Its already challenging enough to try and PROVE to women that Im a great guy. Now some women in this thread like to spread their malicious idea of "when the right time to have sex is" to others. Its like a damn disease or sickness.

I'm SORRY for all the jerks that some women have come across in their lifetime but, assuming that all men only want sex off the bat is dooming yourself and the possibility of having a relationship.

Quite frankly im tired of proving what im worth on the first date. I shouldnt have to and neither should you as a woman. We BOTH should take the TIME, LISTEN and decide for OURSELVES. Whether it be one date or 20. If the feelings are mutual then whats the problem?

Besides, if your having sex you obviously wanted it too right??
 MrPatient1101
Joined: 2/9/2009
Msg: 46 (view)
 
The Six Biggest Dating Mistakes Women Make
Posted: 6/21/2009 6:25:24 PM
If men know immediately when there's an attraction, why does it take them so long to 1- open up, 2-trust, 3-commit to a relationship?
By the time men are ready to decide if there will or won't be a next level to the relationship women have already invested way too much time that they can't get back in something that might be going no where.
That's reallly not fair.


Women are jsut as guilty of this as men. Unfortunatly, most of my expierence with dating has been this way. Im open, if im interested enough to approach you then im just that... interested. The conversation would let me know where its going. If im doing all the calling and txting and you dont even take the time to call me without me initiating contact then why am I here? May be a little off topic but had to voice my opinion.


In regards to a woman talking too much. I have to say I've went on a date like this and you have no idea how frustrating it is when you try to let someone get to know you and cant get a word in. Why am I here?? I can put a mirror up and draw a beard with a marker if you want to do all the talking. To me that says " Im the center, listen to everything I say and I dont care what you have to say"
 MrPatient1101
Joined: 2/9/2009
Msg: 1 (view)
 
Where is the effort at??
Posted: 6/21/2009 6:14:02 PM
I guess the title says it all. For some reason I really dont get any emails on this site from women. No this is not a pity me type of thing. I surely dont mind it. I send out emails to women that intrigue me so I'm quite alright. The thing that bothers me is when I do get an email from a woman its " Wanna chat?"

Really now?? Your joking right? Dont get me wrong I'm not saying there is anything wrong with it but it just seems that guys have to describe what they like, why they are interested in chatting etc. etc. but all the women that email me just ask if I wanna chat.

Well, no I dont want to chat with you, you couldnt even take the time to tell me a little about yourself and it makes me wonder if you even read or looked at my profile at all. Why do these women think that this is acceptable? Is it something about my profile that says "Requires no effort"?

Correct me if I'm wrong ladies but you like a man to be a little witty and take the time to write a lil about themselves in an email before you would even respond correct?

Are any other men expierencing this ??

 MrPatient1101
Joined: 2/9/2009
Msg: 30 (view)
 
Why do guys expect you to immediately become exclusive??? UGH!
Posted: 6/19/2009 8:30:00 PM

There is a tad bit of hypocracy to this.... If a man dates several women at the same time he's a "playa" and should be avoided at all cost. If a woman does it, she's just being choosy. Not applying this to YOU personally - just saying


This is sooo true Cinsav .. sooo true.

On the flipside men have leeway when it comes to sleeping around. I.E. get a pat on the back alas a woman sleeps around and shes a slut.

Its all in prefrence I guess. I personally give my undivided attention to the one that I'm dating simply because.. I 'm obviously attracted to you whether it be personality or w/e but if I shop around I could lose interest pretty quickly and I could be missing out on a wonderful woman. So I take the time to get to know someone.
 MrPatient1101
Joined: 2/9/2009
Msg: 190 (view)
 
Why is there so little dating between white men and black women?
Posted: 6/19/2009 12:16:21 PM

I can also tell you this..the saying "once you go black you never go back"..for "white" women it is not because of the myth of size..it is because "black" men are more protective of their women and families. It is because of how deep their souls run. They express their feelings more to their woman(regardless of the woman's color) then any other men.


Im not trying to stir the pot but this statement is a crock of dung. I LOVE my family and women. I was raised by a single mother and women get the utmost respect from me black or white until they prove they dont deserve it. Dont even try to stigmatize black men care more about their families, souls run deeper and protect women more. I was born and raised in detroit and as we all know its pretty diverse here. I have black m/f friends as I do white hispanic jew etc. The common problem is just the person being close minded and stereotyping. Racists are stupid and the sheer audacity of it should be extinguished.. fast.

Ive been called cracker, white boy etc. from black women I have approached and it left me feeling bitter. However I have been told Im amazing, and numerous other compliments by black women. Its a 2 way street that unfortunatly will never end.

Have any white men tried going out to a bar or club with a black woman??? I have.. and the end result was having to leave to avoid a fight or getting shot. Its not easy dating outside your race simply because people that are racist dont make it easy. Most men would rather not deal with the frustration. The same thing goes for women dating black men. people just dont respect one another anymore.. its not all peace love and happiness anymore.
 MrPatient1101
Joined: 2/9/2009
Msg: 28 (view)
 
Why do guys expect you to immediately become exclusive??? UGH!
Posted: 6/19/2009 11:46:50 AM
In response to Skynight. I agree with what you said somewhat ( only because all men are not this way )

Not saying this is a painted picture of me but. Why would anyone in there right mind want to date multiple people at the same time. It seems to me that instead of getting to know someone one at a time that u want to get to know multiples.

How can you honestly say that is the best way? You could go on a first date and not see fireworks but when getting to know the person fireworks happen. Instead you went with the guy who had fireworks at first the fudded out.

You would ultimatly get in your own way simply because things get distorted and dilluted when you are going on a date with Guy A then the next day you go out with Guy B. Then 2 days back with Guy A again. You smear any perception of who that person really is because you start off comparing the 2.

Thats not ethical IMO. If your going to compare.. do it too decide WHO to go on a date with.. not who gets to stick around. To me that just sounds like you want to have your cake and eat it too
 MrPatient1101
Joined: 2/9/2009
Msg: 23 (view)
 
What platitudes make you wanna pewk?
Posted: 6/18/2009 9:25:03 PM
Sheesh thebugisback .. this was supposed to be fun.. not "technical"
 MrPatient1101
Joined: 2/9/2009
Msg: 17 (view)
 
What platitudes make you wanna pewk?
Posted: 6/18/2009 7:58:48 PM
My favorite that im sick of hearing is " Things will get better"

how about " Things have to get worse to get better" WTH things ARE worse

"Its not you, Its me" noo, apparantly it is me otherwise you would be happy

My stepdad says this to me - im 29 unemployed and had to move back in with the rents

"If thats the worse that can happen, life is good" no, life is eff'd up right about now

lol ive been getting this in replies to emails on here " Smoking is a deal breaker for me" well change you contact options!
 MrPatient1101
Joined: 2/9/2009
Msg: 166 (view)
 
The Teflon Man....
Posted: 6/18/2009 7:03:23 PM
Well Ive read quite a few of these posts and they all say the same thing in different ways. One of the things that stood out was this

"I don't believe that a woman should be forced to terminate a pregnancy just as she should not be forced to have a child if she wishes not to."

Well what about a man being forced to have the child?? Or forced not too?

Yes, women carry the child but lets face it. It takes 2 to tango.

Anyways, too my point.

There are women that take advantage of the system as far as CP and other areas as there is men. Both parties are guilty of the same damn thing.

Im a single father and pay my CP on a regular basis. I didnt even know I was having a son till he was 2 weeks old.

I made the choice to have unprotected sex and you dont see me complaining about it. This argument will NEVER come to a medium ( a middle ground ). Its like religion and the mere starting of this thread was intended for the sole purpose to BASH.

How are you even going to try and say what you said. Women do the SAME DAMN THING and you know it.
 MrPatient1101
Joined: 2/9/2009
Msg: 8 (view)
 
I must be missing something. Any help??
Posted: 6/18/2009 6:15:12 PM
That just goes to show the complexity of the female mind. I never would have looked at the pic that way haha
 MrPatient1101
Joined: 2/9/2009
Msg: 35 (view)
 
Why are men afraid to approach women?
Posted: 6/18/2009 4:45:08 PM
This man has hit it on the nail. In many expierences meeting a woman at a bar is HORRIBLE. Simply because women now a days ( not all ) look down at meeting at a bar. I have to tell you nothing hurts more than a woman tearing you apart in one sentence after you approach her simply because shes not interested. Women just dont use finesse anymore when letting a man know that. They can be rude, give dirty looks, or just ignore you completely.

I cant remember the last time a woman approached me at a bar. Mind you I havent been going to bars much as its just not my scene anymore.

Let me ask you ladies this -- if you see a guy approach a woman at a bar and approaches you later that night in the same bar. What are you thinking? Exactly --

Player!!

However what you dont know is he got rejected when he approached the first girl. In my expierence if I approach a woman at a bar.. thats it for the night simply because of that fact right there. I dont want to be seen as a player when my interests are truly genuine.

Fear of rejection?? Sometimes. most men dont "really" care if they get rejected simply because they know its a fact of life.

Intimidated.. of course!

Then we have the all so common " shes outta my league" which IMO is the top reason why men dont approach women. Men just dont have the confidence they used too simply because women dont allow us to.

You have all these factors above going through your head when deciding whether or not to order another shot and beer and stay at your comfy stool or approaching the woman accross from you and the choice is clear.

meeting women is not like it was 10 years ago. Men have tainted a lot of us good mens reputations by being a jerk or player and thats what we have to deal with when approaching.

heck, even emailing women on this site can be brutal.
 MrPatient1101
Joined: 2/9/2009
Msg: 91 (view)
 
Why are there so many attractive women on POF?
Posted: 6/18/2009 3:59:56 PM
This goes both ways. Women do the same thing. I once met a woman who didnt like heavy drinkers and since I had met her had drank more ( because we go out etc ) than I have in the last year. ( i dont drink much ) However when I stopped drinking on one outting she bashed me for it??? It common for BOTH m/f.

Im tired of games too.

hows this tho. I am 29 with a special needs son and financially struggling. I dont have the best car, currently unemployed ( got laid off I live in Michigan ). however im a great person, I genuinely care about everyone and their feelings, very outgoing and open minded. When telling this to a woman tho is fine.. the days to come are not though as I never get returned calls, or anything. Is real life that scary? Dont ever tell me that I have baggage.. My son is NOT baggage. My life may be a little upside down but thats life. it throws curve balls at you and sometimes you get hit.

the world we live in now is FAR from perfect but more and more lately Im meeting women who are looking for the perfect guy, superficial, matierialistic and down right rude / nasty.

Most of the women on this site I contact have children because I know that a woman w/o children will most likely not accept the fact that I do. It dosent matter though, I still do not get replys. Nobody is willing to look past the materialistic things in life to the inner person. Does it bother me... it sure does. Am i going to let it stop me from looking for the person thats right for me? Nope, however it is very very discouraging almost to the point of "why do I try".

Ive tried everything and my emails are original because I put thought into them. Still to my dismay, here I am , single and not dating lol
 MrPatient1101
Joined: 2/9/2009
Msg: 33 (view)
 
Men/Women Please dont make this mistake...
Posted: 6/18/2009 3:34:11 PM
A classic move called a neg?? Its definetly not a move that a "player" would use. If a guy is a player he is a smooth talker. Smooth talkers/ Players dont slip up the conversation... its planned.

Aside from all of that, I think he was trying to give you a compliment. Ive said something similar like that but the reason was because I was a little insecure about sending the email and was trying to be submissive. All in All.. dont take offense.
 MrPatient1101
Joined: 2/9/2009
Msg: 6 (view)
 
I must be missing something. Any help??
Posted: 6/17/2009 11:47:42 PM
Ok so Ive made some changes. Tell me what yall think. Thanks for the help thus far
 
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