Not all women have casual sex. This lady never has and never will. Why? Because it goes against my personal values, beliefs, and morals. I only have sex and make love when in love, in a relationship, and when I have feelings for a man. Otherwise, between relationships I take care of my own needs. Casual sex is very risky, dangerous, and irresponsible, immature behaviour.

•Vaginal intercourse - infected men to uninfected women
One study put the risk at about 1 chance of infection in 100,000 unprotected sexual encounters but again, the one might be the first contact you have.

•Vaginal intercourse - infected women to uninfected men
Studies seem to confirm that the risk is quite low, about 1 in 200,000 but of course the risk is not zero.

•Oral sex
Admittedly the risk of transmitting HIV during oral sex is extremely low, but the risk is there and it is not zero. Important Fact! Keep in mind that beside HIV, oral sex can transmit other sexually transmitted diseases such has herpes and syphilis.

Keyword here is CONSISTENTLY. Yeah, a lot of people use condoms. How many use condoms EVERY SINGLE TIME they have sex?

Well, the last couple I knew who claimed to have used a condom 100% of the time, just recently had to have a condom-baby abortion.
As for whether or not the couple were 100% they claimed they were. As in her saying "That thing doesn't touch me unless it's got a condom on" and him begging a ride to the drug store to get some because "No way in hell do I get sex unless I get some" . They are my G/F's daughter and her long term b/f.... Soundss to me like they were 100% users... Since she knew her mother had gotten a couple of STD's in the past, he was a fanatic about them.

couples where one partner is HIV positive will not transmit the virus to to the negative partner. Why? Because condoms work! But you have to use them EVERY time.

Actually the studies have shown that they DID NOT transmit the virus. Not the same thing as WILL NOT... It just means in those studies, there was no transmission...

And you'd have an argument if STDs were on the the rise in people who consistently use condoms. Just because condoms are available doesn't mean people actually use them and that's what you're assuming.

Ummm Actually, the use of condoms has become almost the norm for most people. so I'd say that it is rising regardless.

I for one want to know why if condoms are so reliable, why we have more cases of STD's than we used to.

That has more to do with the ignorance of people (like the guys mentioned in the OP), not the effectiveness of condoms themselves.


Yes and no.

If you're having sex with someone having a flagrant outbreak of genital herpes, no amount of condoms will protect from that.... Unless you just kinda lay there, and don't do any sort of touching...

All it takes is thigh-to-thigh contact with someone experiencing a herpes outbreak to contract the disease.

What kind of testing do you wait for? Don't HIV tests (to be 100% sure) take 6-9 months or longer, for a few negative results? HPV has no tests. Herpes, if nothing is seen, can not be tested for either, since according to my Urologist, Type 1 (which is VERY pervasive), Type 2, chicken pox and even shingles might cause a positive test.

Newblue -- I don't know how it is down your way, but in Canada, it's 2 weeks maximum for HIV results. If you get "the call" within 2 weeks after providing a sample, you're pretty much boned (unless you wanna get the test done again). If "the call" doesn't come in, then you're laughing. Maybe in the beginning, tests took months to provide results, but that was in the 80's man...it's almost 25 years later.

And STDs are an issue no matter how long you wait - that doesnt help anything. Even first date sex should have the 'talk' and use protection


So what is protection?
A condom is not foolproof, nor 100% effective so it doesn't qualify for the word protection. A condom should be described as partial protection. But we don't call it that because it's unpleasant to think we cannot be 100% safe. So we pretend it is.

I don't trust condoms to protect anything. I personally think relying on a condom for protection is foolishness. So for me, I will wait for the testing and the results...
Too many people think condoms are 100% protection. There are still sources that mistakenly refer to condom use as safe sex instead of safer sex...
People are not being told that condoms are necessary for oral sex...
People are not being told that condoms don't protect against Herpes...
People are not being told that no condom offers 100% protection...
People forget that pregnancies happen even with regular reliable condom use...
If you have oral sex without a condom, you might as well not bother for intercourse...

If condoms were as effective as advertised, we'd have a steady reduction in the number of STD cases instead of a steady rise.

A sexual overture is an offer of sex... the negotiation per se. It is not flirting or coy passes... it's basically the equivalent of Let's fvck.

There's a marked difference between overture and innuendo.

As for reaching or making a good effort... nope, I was merely wanting clarification on something...

Cheers...

WOW is all I can say. What world are you living in where a sexual overture is suddenly beyond just a flirt, and now translates into "let's ****"?

Whatever, I guess we both live in different worlds then, and I'm cool with that. I still say you were reaching though.

invu3.......When you get the chance go to the site listed below and do some of your own research and you will see that men can be tested for HPV, along with many other things that some think are just women tests.

The whole point is to let those thinking that condoms are the cure all for sex and diseases, are just fooling themselves, and the BEST way to make sure that you stay disease free will be mutual testing, open communications, and exclusivity......either that or abstinence..........

http://www.health-science-report.com/hpv/hpv-cure/hpv-male-test.html

Just my opinion......

" can not tell you how many have contracted herpes while having sex with a condom, or having oral sex, etc., and not having the knowledge that one can be passing on that disease with or without a condom, and not even in an outbreak period."

That's how I got the Herpes. It was with a condom on! The chicky that gave it to me was a girl that insisted on condoms every time! She still got it. I think the damn things are vastly overrated.

I think I would be INCREDIBLY offended as a man if a woman actually spit... I've talked to MANY men over the years who have told me they've had at least one female do this... If you're not into it, don't do it!! WTF??!!

I continue to take my health seriously, and know that I am disease free,

If condoms were so safe, the number of STD's wouldn't be on the rise despite all the warnings about using them.

That must be why I got bored with that scene ("You call yourselves DANCERS?! I'm outta here!"). I don't care if they were naked, I want to see talent!

When have I EVER said that because I don't believe that the quantity of fluids are equal that a woman shouldn't swallow because of this? Oh right, never!


In msg 196, you wrote:


What is this reciprocity BS? It implies equality, and unless a woman is a "squirter," there's nothing equal about a load of cum and the fluids excreted when a woman orgasms.

Ah, this what your problem is. You're lumping me into a category I don't even think I belong in. Don't assume that because I don't swallow that I share all the negative views that others have expressed about swallowing. It's just simply not the case.

You seem to be making a fair effort on their behalf for someone who doesn't share their views.

Not saying it's better, just tired of seeing the two compared when they're vastly different in my opinion. I find the whole "well we swallow when we go down on women so they should swallow too" argument completely weak.

Then stop using the reverse argument.

I would never have mentioned it had you and the other no swallowing zealots not made it THE issue.

And, as I pointed out, men produce about a teaspoon, max, which casts your assertion very much in doubt.

All you've done is try to rationalize it and you've spent most of your reply continuing to do so rather than just say you don't like it and let that stand on its own.

I'd rather deal with a woman that doesn't swallow then all of these long azz drawn out medical post! When will some people realize that sometimes the less said the better?

Even if you are swallowing more, you aren't swallowing it all at one time, now are you?


Why is that better? Basically, you are expecting people to beieve that it's worse simply because you don't want to do it and you don't want to say you just dislike it without injecting some unarguable objective reason for it.

The argument had nothing to do with oral sex itself so I really don't know what the point of your link was. It was a point simply made that shows that the amount of bodily fluids produced by men is more than that produced by women. If they were the same, HIV transmission between the two wouldn't be so disparate.

Since you wrote:


There's also the fact that HIV is more readily transmitted in heterosexual cases from male-to-female rather than female-to-male. This is has to do with amount of bodily fluids exchanged. More semen is produced than vaginal fluids (again, squirters set aside)
.
Exactly what was your point then? This thread is about oral sex.

If fluid volume was the overriding factor, the chances of being infected by a needle puncture would be small, since the volume of fluid exchanged is very tiny compared with the fluids with which one is in contact during sex.

Stop trying to rationalize your dislike for swallowing with pseudo scientific arguments. The fact is you dislike it and for some reason, you are bothered by those who do like it or those who might expect reciprocity. If you don't like it, fine. Don't do it. Just stop trying to convince others that you have some moral high ground with respect to guys who want their partners to swallow and who do not want to date women who do not. You have no more justification for not wanting to swallow than I have for not wanting to date women who don't swallow. I quit buying into the idea that guys ought to be grateful for what women decide to throw at them a long time ago. I don't have to settle for less than I expect, so I'm not going to settle for less.

Considering the amount of fluid that accompanies peforming oral sex on a woman whether she has an orgasm or not, what's the difference? I'm sure I swallow a lot more than the amount of ejaculate from a male.

In addition, a woman can always take the fluid in the back of her throat and never have to taste it.

That argument regarding HIV is a non-starter for oral sex. A study done by the USCF Center for AIDS Prevention Studies places the risk of contracting HIV from an infected male partner, for the recipient of oral sex at approximately zero.

Finally, invu, I would be interested in the research you have read regarding the quantity of male and female cum

Perhaps if you would not refer to others as "stupid" so often people would not bother you.

There are currently studies on the effectiveness and safety of Gardasil on males who are, clearly, part of the problem.

i said in my earlier post,the majority of men that contact me say they are straight-hetro in other words.so how can they really be straight or hetro if they are contacting me?

I have a friend with AIDS he shared that his meds run him $3500.00 a month.... if he ever looses his job or insurance he is as good as dead unless he starts robbing banks.... Rather than date now he uses a glove and pays hookers...

How on earth is a population skewed towards a prison demographic going to inflate figures relating to same-sex orientation amongst males? There is nothing special about a prison demographic which skews Kinsey's findings one way or another as far as sexual orientation is concerned.

ivnu3

It's not considered a blowjob unless she swallows.

I've been dating for 25+ years. It's true it's not a random sample. I only date women to whom I'm attracted and in general have at least an undergraduate degree, although the latter is due more to circumstance. However, I don't ever ask them about what they will do, so there is nothing that makes them predisposed to thinking about sex any differently than other women. If you would like to claim that attractive women with a lot of education are more likely to swallow, be my guest.

Then maybe you should eat pvssy instead of giving blowjobs.

If you can get guys to buy into that, go for it. Personally, I think it's rather egotistical to suggest that somehow guys produce fluids that are naturally repulsive while you can't imagine that being the case for a woman. Get over it.

The trouble with threads like this; is that they're just not representative of the real world. Out their in the real world, just the merest suggestion of things like swallowing and anal sex would be enough to instantly end a relationship for ever.

I say that a woman who doesn't want to reciprocate is selfish.

Information isn't inaccurate.

Body fluids have to contain some amount of blood (not that they always do) with the HIV virus...and be transmitted to the other persons bloodstream.

And bonobos experience very little problems, if any, with agression, violence, and war since sex solves all that for them. So maybe we should be taking our cues from them!

Yep...

The only thing is their average lifespan is only 40 years....
They are also known for killing and eating other primates... despite their apparently peaceful promiscuous existence....

If there are women out there who just want sex with whoever is convenient at the time and think it's ok...then fine, do it. Because, if we look at the Bonobos, that's what they do. Is that what we aspire to? Our society as humans? It's rather comical.

I can certainly understand why some women can't/won't swallow if it's a texture issue. One thing they might try is to give their partner the blow job after having sex. They will find there will be MUCH less ejaculate to deal with. They then may find that in time they can deal with a bigger load at a later time.

As far as disease? Most of them can be contracted with just skin to skin contact, where it doesn't matter if she swallows or not. The dredded AIDS virus though as we all know is transferred via from one persons blood to anothers. SO....if the woman lets her man cum in her mouth and then takes the time to run to the bathroom to spit it out, all that time the cum sits in her mouth the greater the chance of her catching something via blood. Cum can contain trace amounts of blood, and if a woman has any open sore or bleeding gums for instance it's a pathway for any blood virus to gain access to her system. That being said, it's clear it's best to swallow as he's "shooting" so it doesn't linger in her mouth any longer than necc.

And this insistence on the long term that many people have, it is counter nature!
In the LT, the sun will stop shining and our solar system wil cease to exist!

So why have kids...? Why did your parents have kids?
Aren't they for the future....
In actual fact, nature does plan for the long term... it's called evolution...
Life and our current view of it is short term...
Finally, mankind has evolved enough to see that there is more to life than simply existing... And people like you come along with a narrow, live for now attitude... Well, even Darwin ackonledged there'd be 'throwbacks'...

A one on one FWB thing is desirable I'm sure, but really it amounts to being in a relationship no matter how you call it. If FWB's were monogamous, there'd be almost no point, you might as well be B/F + G/F.

And yes, on my wedding day, i would rather have a new car than used.

Oh no he DIDN'T compare a woman to a "used car", if a woman is used because she has some sexual experience, then what is he for doing it too? I may be a used car, but at least I ain't a lemon, like guys who say crap like that.

And yes you are avoiding all the right guys anyway, the right guy will wait and never settle for a dude that makes you feel like women who have sex are bad, because YOU will be the 'used car' one day!

So, I guess I'm wondering why people are afraid to categorize their wants???????? Hence the "hang out" vs. "intimate encounter" categorization. Does it correlate with the not happy with relationship vs. to afraid to leave aspect???????????