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Author
Thread: Should i act on it.
destructodave
Joined:
4/18/2009
Msg:
4 (
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Should i act on it.
Posted:
7/12/2009 2:43:54 AM
thats the thing. its not my first rodeo. I've been worked for tips, or it was real flirting. I just have a hunch. Maybe its the alcohol. I dont put much merit into asking waitresses/bartenders out, but im a little lit and bored(too much coffee to sober up) figured i'd get some advice for the next time i go out.
destructodave
Joined:
4/18/2009
Msg:
1 (
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Should i act on it.
Posted:
7/12/2009 2:14:44 AM
Ok, I've always had a problem reading waitresses or bartenders. I usually figure any flirting is just trying to get a tip outta me. But this one keeps on, and me still being half drunk im dumb enough to post a thread askin some help for next time.
There is a bartender at this club I go to sometimes that is really flirty. The last few times I've went out, she has done all sorts of things but I never act on it, i just ignore her for the most part.
Things like spanking me, asking me where i live, how old i am, wanting to see my shoes, saying how much she likes left handed ppl, if i still go to school, all sorts of shit. Now waiting in line I never see this happening to anyone else, so I've always wondered if I could make a move and pull this woman. What you think? Just working on a tip, or is there a legitimate chance here. I hate hitting on waitresses and bartenders. I have no problem picking up real signs from women around the place, but I'm always weary to make a move on someone that works there.
Your thoughts please.
destructodave
Joined:
4/18/2009
Msg:
60 (
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UFC 100 Let the speculation begin
Posted:
7/8/2009 5:02:45 PM
I hope Mir gets stomped by lesnar. He barely won the first time.
I think gsp will dominate alves, but u never know anyone can get lucky.
bisping bleh. i hope he gets knocked out first punch.
destructodave
Joined:
4/18/2009
Msg:
3966 (
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DAILY QUOTES
Posted:
7/8/2009 3:49:29 PM
Your only embarrassed if you care what other people think.
movie hotrod.
destructodave
Joined:
4/18/2009
Msg:
34 (
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healthy snacks
Posted:
7/8/2009 3:48:34 PM
Peanut butter and an apple
destructodave
Joined:
4/18/2009
Msg:
13 (
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A nice tasting Protein Shake?
Posted:
7/8/2009 3:47:19 PM
Myofusion or Muscle milk are great tasting. I'm lactose intolerant and the cheaper grades of protien hurt my stomach, so i have to go with isolate. more expensive doesnt taste as good though.
destructodave
Joined:
4/18/2009
Msg:
10 (
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Girl Problem
Posted:
7/7/2009 2:27:43 AM
skyzeus apparently i keep pressuring her into sex by making out too hot and heavy. But damn its not even that hot and heavy its a little kissing then sex. Thats one of the main arguements she has for a week. Its not that i dont want to initiate, we start kissing and boom she is ready to go i dont even have a chance to make the first move. im used to at least a little foreplay or something.
Its just after 3 months you dont tell someone, "i think i do" when they ask if you still wanna date or like me. That seriously pissed me off. You know if you do or not. I dunno, i think the smartest move i could make when she eventually txts me is just to nip the whole thing in the bud while its not that serious. If i keep letting her control the whole relationship im just gonna be in a world of hurt i think.
destructodave
Joined:
4/18/2009
Msg:
7 (
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Girl Problem
Posted:
7/7/2009 12:32:24 AM
no not really. I mean i like the girl, and a little drama doesnt bother me, but damn this was not the week for this. Well, last time i felt like i had a part in this. This time it just came right out of the blue after we had a good weekend together.
She's always trying to make me jealous with "other guy" bullshit, but i dont let that bother me. But im starting to think there is another guy anyways. Im not planning on txting or talking to her anymore, but i have a sneaking suspicion she will end up messaging me after she has either had her fun, or calmed down. And i really dont know what im gonna do at that moment. I'm starting to lose some of the strong feelings i had to fix this type of thing the first time.
destructodave
Joined:
4/18/2009
Msg:
5 (
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Girl Problem
Posted:
7/7/2009 12:19:29 AM
one week is definately something. I damn sure couldnt have gotten away with saying any of that.
And im personally having a terrible week because as she knows, my dog died friday. He was pretty much my kid and im extremely tore up about it still. To hit me with this just makes me even more mad. I seriously think as other posters said she is just a drama queen, and more then likely another guy is on the side. There is no reason for 1 week in my opinion.
They werent one liners, They were more like "yea" "im going to gym". nothing really there.
destructodave
Joined:
4/18/2009
Msg:
1 (
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Girl Problem
Posted:
7/7/2009 12:01:44 AM
I had this breakup with well a girl i was wanting to date earlier. We been together 3 months or so.
For starters we had a great 4th together. Monday I msg her to ask her how her day is going, and she talks about how she doesnt like how her life is going and us having sex and whatnot.
So im like damn, we been dating like 2 and a half months were grownups, she said i pressure her into everything. She initiates sex 90% of the time. If were making out she just takes my pants off. I mean damn how am i pressuring her? Anyways she said she "thinks" she likes me and needs a week to do some "soul-searching". And that she is trying to better herself in other ways in life and doesnt need outside pressures. I tell here i like her but whatever she needs to do. So i just decide screw it i wont talk to her for awhile. she msg's thruout the day with little bullcrap texts. I one word them, because i reread some of her texts and i was mad all day.
She gets mad saying screw me she tried to talk to me all day and i dont care. I go wtf you tell me u need a week, you "think so" on liking me, and that u dont need me, the pressure master, dragging you down. She says i never listen. I told her hell i dont want a "i think so" u either do or you dont. She says i think so means yes blah blah i never listen if i want an answer and cant wait its no. i never listen and never cared she was just there.
I tell her I made every effort i could to show her i wanted to be with her. hell i told her i liked her and wanted her how much more plain can i say it? She says all i think about is me. I tell her im not the one wanting a 1 week soul searching break. She says it wasnt a breakup i dont listen blah blah. I told her then what the hell is it? She didn't wanna see me for a week, why even tell me that crap? I told her screw it when your "I think so" is a 100% like mine, msg till then bye. She said a few more things how im stupid we still had a day this weekend, even though after I asked for that day earlier, she says she needs a week. I told her if she does cool if not bye damn. Im sick of it. I said a few more sappy ones kinda but I was mad. She didn't answer them
We barely even been dating. like 3 months. Really I dont get it. She asked me sunday if we were serious, like bf/gf, I said I dunno do you ask that anymore? So I asked. She got embarrassed and blurted out a really stupid answer that I'm still mad about, "too much restriction".
To be honest I dont know what this girl wants out of me. We were going great then this just hits right out the blue after the 4th. It's almost like she feels bad for partying on the 4th and blames me for it. Really i dont know what this is. Enlighten me. For the moment were done, but I think she will end up texting me. Something similar has happened before. Smart thing would probably be to move on, but i dont know.
destructodave
Joined:
4/18/2009
Msg:
14 (
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Mistakes Made
Posted:
7/2/2009 3:00:03 PM
What is it lol? did you not try and kiss her? open a door? not pay for dinner? what? i mean it cant be that bad if its something you forgot to do.
I could see all this worrying if you like groped her and she said no, or done something really freakin bad. But if its something you just let slip and not do i dont get it.
destructodave
Joined:
4/18/2009
Msg:
5 (
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OK for a man to ask woman to his apt on 4th date?
Posted:
7/2/2009 2:49:01 PM
All this good advice.
For one I enjoy cooking dinner for a woman. I think its a bit of a turn-on for most, and yep id be lying if i said i wasnt trying to get her in the sack. But its up to the woman. Ive cooked dinner at my place and then they left, no sex.
Don't worry about it if you dont sleep with the guy. A good guy will understand. He will just go, "well shit i coulda swore breaking out the big guns like dinner at my place woulda worked, oh well" and try again another time.
destructodave
Joined:
4/18/2009
Msg:
11 (
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He won't ask a girl out unless he's 80% sure he's got a chance
Posted:
7/2/2009 2:41:25 PM
Yea fear of rejection can be terrible, especially the more you like the girl. Its much easier to get rejected by a complete stranger then someone you know.
destructodave
Joined:
4/18/2009
Msg:
12 (
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Mistakes Made
Posted:
7/2/2009 2:38:40 PM
what did you do? its kinda hard to see how severe this is without knowing exactly what you did or didnt do.
It could be something so stupid and minor that you are not the one to blame. So share with us what happened. It would be alot easier to give you some comfort or sound advice if we knew the whole story.
destructodave
Joined:
4/18/2009
Msg:
35 (
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Is this a game, or interest?
Posted:
7/2/2009 2:36:05 PM
There are plenty of men around that are willing to do the wooing. You may not like it, but you are always competing against the other men she has experienced. Guys who may have done all the calling, asking out, whisking her off her feet, etc.
Which is exactly why you need to not show her the same ole song and dance she is used to. Especially if there is other men in the picture. You need to separate yourself as desirable, someone in demand.
You can woo her when you get her. Right now you aint got her.
destructodave
Joined:
4/18/2009
Msg:
69 (
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Why Is It That Guys Want Sex On The First Night?
Posted:
7/2/2009 2:29:31 PM
As my 80 year old granddad told me once:
"It's a man's job to try and get them bloomers off, and its the woman's job to try and keep them bloomers on"
Haha that always cracked me up when i was younger.
Any guy with any sort of Alphaness or Manliness will try and get as far as he can as fast as he can. Thats just the gist of it. You work for a kiss, then you work for more. It's just how it is in our brains. You go awesome i got a kiss. Awesome i got a good steamy kiss. wonder if i can touch something? wonder if i can go even farther? it doesnt hurt our feelings when you say no or dont kiss or whatever. We just have to try.
Just give what you wanna give. A kiss, a hug, or nothing at all. If the guy doesnt like it good riddens to him. You weeded out a bad one.
destructodave
Joined:
4/18/2009
Msg:
8 (
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They say you can't meet a wife at a bar...????????
Posted:
7/2/2009 2:02:19 PM
Poster above me is right its just a place to hang out, meet people, and be social. Its not the 7th level of hell with drunks and orgies.
destructodave
Joined:
4/18/2009
Msg:
33 (
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Is this a game, or interest?
Posted:
7/2/2009 2:00:38 PM
Sounds like a little bit of a game. You just need to play.
Dont talk to her about where its going or anything like that. Just act like it doesnt bother you in the least, like you got a million other things going on in your life besides just her.
You did good by not giving in to her when she wanted to hang out after cancelling. Really, I would try as hard as i could not to over contact her. make her contact you. If she likes you she will. She will overanalyze the same crap you are now. why you arent contacting her.
People will flame and say dont play these games but sometimes you just have to.
Her having a guard up and whatnot could be a viable excuse, but who's to say this isnt how she dated in the past? Id just play along, show interest on the date, but act like your life is busy enough without her. Give her a challenge.
destructodave
Joined:
4/18/2009
Msg:
6 (
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They say you can't meet a wife at a bar...????????
Posted:
7/2/2009 1:48:11 PM
Its a huge misconception that you cant meet a good person at a bar. Its really stupid. Ive met more people with their heads screwed on straight out having a good time at a bar then i have anywhere else. People with their lives in order.
Yea there is some bad apples. But hell there is anywhere. The only thing about a bar is you might just meet a complete stranger and have nothing in common. So what? Try again.
Its more a urban myth that sorry ass drunkards who only like to party slosh around at bars all the time. Fresh 21 year olds maybe. There is alot of people who just like to be social, have a drink with some friends, or dance, or think they might meet someone there too because they wonder the same thing. where can they meet someone.
My current girlfriend i met at the club. Shes pretty, independant, and a college graduate. She still has goals and aspirations, and tries to stay fit. We dont have the same exact hobbies, but to be honest, ive learned to love new experiences that id never even tried had it not been for whoever i was dating being interested in it. I dont get the whole carbon copy compatibility crap going around nowadays. I enjoy learning new things.
To be honest i dont think ive ever met a flat out slut unless i was actually looking for a flat out slut that night.
destructodave
Joined:
4/18/2009
Msg:
18 (
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Should I have just kept my mouth shut?
Posted:
6/30/2009 9:11:16 PM
x2 on the guy post above me. You could have skirted around the fact and told him what you liked instead of how terrible he was at it.
Personally, I'd never tell a woman she was not good. Id just try and tell her what i wanted. But everyone makes mistakes with words. I personally want to be told if im not doing good or not. You never get any better if you dont. But when you say something like this, be prepared to hear his side on how bad you do things too. I've never slept with a woman that did or was as good as i wanted. And im sure they have thought the same about me. I'm seriously suprised he took it without saying a word about your abilities.
I think u can work it out though. You prob. just really killed his ego. The first time i had someone say something about me like that it was a rough hit. I got over it though. She actually wanted it the way you described him doing it lol. Go figure.
destructodave
Joined:
4/18/2009
Msg:
47 (
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Is this nature's joke on us?
Posted:
6/30/2009 2:42:32 PM
Spoken for you can hate on me and my name all you want, but the sad fact is in the real world what i said works and goes 90% of the time. I mean hell the entire act of "chasing a woman" is basically playing her game anyways. But women dont look at it like that do they? Its only a bad game when you force the woman to chase you back.
And any guy that has ever had any real success meeting women knows that you need to force the woman to do some chasing. Be it games or whatnot. I keep seeing, "oh its built on false promises." Most of the time any relationship at the beginning is built on BS. So much is let go because of the attraction. Couple months in when all those little annoyances and real opinions start coming out is when you learn the real person, whether you 2 played games with each other or not.
And for one, Im not single. Ive never even met a girl on here. I came here awhile back to check it out just to see. Ive been dating a girl for a few months now, which i met and used some real world principles to separate myself from the pack and seem desirable. Funny thing is we dont play games anymore. Even though some of our initial attraction was built on being coy and game playing, we are the same as any other relationship this far in. Talk all day, have fun, see each other all the time, etc.
Games are part of life sorry. Get over it. OP as others said dont listen to women about picking up women. You might as well get "doormat" tatooed on your forehead if you do because you will be consistently hurt and friendzoned over and over if you do. Trust me. It took me awhile to realize what women say they want and what they actually want are always 2 different things. They want a challenge.
Nearly everyone plays games whether they admit it or not. In some shape or form, everyone has or is playing games. Unless you've magically got lucky and met your clone in an opposite sex, someone is chasing someone, and whoever is being chased is infact playing a game.
And where the heck does this misconception come from that playing some attraction games that you will never find the right person? Seriously? Who comes up with this. Even players settle down. Hell take my little relationship for instance. Im not saying its meant forever, you never know. But we look back and laugh about the coyness and game playing that went on when we first met. No sense in letting that crap bother you.
I mention my relationship because just like all the other people here telling you, "oh well we didnt do that and we are soooooo happy been together for 1 year, or some other small amount of time and its perfect. My way is perfect. And dave has no idea what hes talking about." Well i play games OP. Or did to meet my woman. And guess what were still together, and I met her out in the real world. So dont think you cant actually get something meaningful unless you doormat it up.
I'm not saying you have to. As you can see from other ppl's posts, you can meet someone without playing games. Its not impossible. But if you want the greatest chance to get the woman you want, give yourself a fighting chance and play a few games.
OP here is the only advice you need. MAKE THE WOMAN CHASE.
destructodave
Joined:
4/18/2009
Msg:
28 (
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Is this nature's joke on us?
Posted:
6/24/2009 9:27:56 PM
Well, its simple. You keep doing what you've always done, and you keep getting what you always got OP. So if youve always showered women with affection and attention, then u know that doesnt work. So try the opposite.
destructodave
Joined:
4/18/2009
Msg:
9 (
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unexplained looseness...
Posted:
6/23/2009 8:59:22 PM
im gonna go with he lost his erection. Prob. another reason why he didnt want oral. He was depressed and embarrassed. Because i have no clue why you would turn that down just because the woman was loose. If anything, you would be loving that was offered.
I think he lost his erection and mindjobbed himself. Most guys have done it. I have had it happen, and yea you can forget about orgasming then even if it comes back.
destructodave
Joined:
4/18/2009
Msg:
44 (
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Is it wrong to say I don't want and cannot be JUST friends?
Posted:
6/23/2009 1:46:29 PM
You did the right thing OP. This actually just happened to me this weekend with a girl i was dating. We were at the city pool tryin to make up(or so i thought) and i asked if we were still dating, she said she didnt know maybe friends, so i go ok so no dating. She shrugs her shoulders. I just get up start puttin my belt on and she goes, "OMG so now your just gonna leave now??" i said "yep". told her friend goodbye and told her i didnt want to be her friend and i said cya and left. Was hard, i liked her, but i felt the so much better about it now.
No sense in being some ego booster or constant backup plan when things arent going right in her life. Good luck OP, you were right.
destructodave
Joined:
4/18/2009
Msg:
16 (
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Is this nature's joke on us?
Posted:
6/23/2009 10:10:43 AM
yea thats the best way to do it. Actually have that much going on in your life lol. But if you dont, at least fake it or attempt to make it really happen.
Ill be the first to say i wish it wasnt this way. I wish i could go out meet the girl, we spend all kinds of time together and have fun and call and be perfect. But it just isnt like that at all. You either play or watch someone else play you right out of the girl you want.
destructodave
Joined:
4/18/2009
Msg:
45 (
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Men/Women Please dont make this mistake...
Posted:
6/23/2009 10:07:34 AM
So your tellin me that if you would have hit on this guy first, and he made a statement similiar the one the girl made me, you would have reacted differently? like if he said, "well i normally dont find people like you attractive" or whatever he said, i forgot what you said he said lol.
That would have been ok? I think that would have set you off too. Just gotta lighten up Carmen. Id say he thought he was giving you a really good compliment, just didnt come out right. We've all done it to some degree. Said something we thought was awesome, for it to seem backhanded.
Personally i always get called a dork or lame or something like that right along with my compliement by women. All the time. I take no offense to it. Because they didnt mean it as a putdown. It just came out backhanded.
destructodave
Joined:
4/18/2009
Msg:
14 (
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Is this nature's joke on us?
Posted:
6/23/2009 9:57:52 AM
Haha not a man yet huh?
I think we will just have to agree to disagree. You do not have to call a woman every day to stay fresh in a woman's mind. And its that insecurity of her talking to another guy that you should never ever worry about. So what? Your not dating her yet. If you were good enough to spark alot of attraction to get her number and get her liking you the first time, she will still be thinking about why that guy hasnt called me like all the other guys. See there? you just separated yourself from the other guys and you seem desirable and have important things going on.
Its a simple process. You may not have to do it all the time. The girl may ginuinely be wanting you and doesnt matter what the hell you do call 50 times a day or not. And there is a ton more to it then just doing phone games, but im not gonna put it here.
Online on a dating site i guess it wouldnt work. Alot of people are looking for true love, serious relationships, have been burnt by games and are bitter about it, etc.
But the type of women I generally go for, the hot girls at the club or the wanted girls with 50 other suitors pining away calling all day, something that simple will separate you from the pack.
Hell ill give an example of my last GF. Really pretty girl, met her out one night got her number. I messaged the next day 1 time just to see what she was up to. I didnt get a reply so i didnt message again. 7 days later i got a message from her asking what i was doing. There we go date number 1. Set up date number 2, i didnt message at all for 2-3 days(was hard but i did it) then i just got some really stupid txt saying gibberish. She just wanted to see if i was still there basically. I answered and sent one more no answer. Yes she was a game player too. Never send more then 2 txts if you dont get an answer so i didnt. She messaged me on date day i didnt even have to. This type of stuff continued for about 4 dates till she just broke down and ask if i was playing hard to get or something. We went out i cleared the air on our texting games and had a good laugh about it and we dated for about 4 months. We didnt break up because of that, we both got sloppy drunk and said a bunch of things to each other and thats that. That and i think i started chasing too much. Was losing my challenge factor.
games work for attraction. plain and simple. I'm not pretending to be some kind of pimp im pretty horrible at games because i wanna call and talk and show alot of attention.
and that " she could during that time talk/date other men" get that crap out of your head for good. Thats the last thing you should worry about in the beginning. Thats what she should be thinking about you.
destructodave
Joined:
4/18/2009
Msg:
8 (
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Is this nature's joke on us?
Posted:
6/23/2009 12:17:59 AM
Oh btw i know whats getting in the way of my dating success. Im attracted to the wrong type of woman. To each his own i guess
destructodave
Joined:
4/18/2009
Msg:
7 (
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Is this nature's joke on us?
Posted:
6/23/2009 12:12:49 AM
Well its late and I took it as a personal attack, heck even some of your last post has some barbs aimed my way. And the game playing im talking about is in person, meeting people in the real world. I havent met up with a single person on here so i cant really comment on internet dating. I hardly talk to anyone at all on here there just isnt very much going on in my neck of the woods that im interested in. But i like reading forums too so here i am.
The sad fact of it is holding off texting or calling for a day or days works. And the relationships i do have dont just end or fall flat because of something as stupid as that. They end because we just werent right for each other. Your taking it to the extreme, as in some guy you ALWAYS have to text or make the call first everytime. No, you just as a guy, need to make sure its a give and take so that you seem to be a prize too. You dont have to play games with all women, but im gonna go out on a limb and say the OP is talking about a really hot woman and needs to seperate himself from the pack and seem desirable.
But im no expert on the entire relationship. But for the OP question about grabbing inital attraction, little games will work for that.
destructodave
Joined:
4/18/2009
Msg:
5 (
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Is this nature's joke on us?
Posted:
6/22/2009 11:22:15 PM
I told you how much it worked for me, even though you had to intentionally flame me for something everyone knows is true. You think just because im on this dating site I'm some kind of massive failure with women all the time? Please. Games keep attraction whether you admit it or not. When you stop providing a challenge 9 times out of 10 your on your way out the door.
And if you do it right she may not even be the wiser. You have to chase back eventually to let her catch up. Its just the way it is, and works fine in the beginning. Like i said a little harmless game playing to keep the fires burning hurts no one. But just mentioning games around here sets off some kind of witch-hunt for players.
Maybe once in a blue moon someone can have a Walgreen commercial moment like yours and land the man of their dreams with no bs attached, but it doesnt happen often. How long did you go through the dating scene before you found your 1 year relationship? So dont get up on that high horse just yet.
OP i dont pretend to know everything about a relationship. But that will work to spark initial attraction. Try it once and see for yourself. And try what others tell you too and see which one works the best.
destructodave
Joined:
4/18/2009
Msg:
40 (
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Men/Women Please dont make this mistake...
Posted:
6/22/2009 10:34:51 PM
Haha i cant believe all the over-analyzing going on in this thread. Why do people do that? Women more often then men i just dont get it. Ive been in the OP exact position in a club where i was trying to dance with a black girl and hitting on her and just said, "You are sexy for a white guy, but i dont date white guys" Did i flip out? nope i struted off thinking hell yea she thought i was sexy for a white guy and she doesnt even like em. And thats exactly how she meant it. She wasnt being racist or backhanded. She was just telling me i wasnt her type, but she still found me attractive.
Alot of times things so much better in ones head and even still sound great until its picked apart by someone overanalyzing the hell out of it. Like the person earlier who said the guy said she looks better in person. Id damn sure take that as a compliment. That just doesnt happen very often that a woman u meet actually looks even close to their pics. Most of the time the pics are way more flattering and have your best angles. Now he went overboard on the nose thing, but not everyone has a way with words.
Ppl just need to calm down and be a little less critical of every single thing they see. More often then not right intentions were meant.
destructodave
Joined:
4/18/2009
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Is this nature's joke on us?
Posted:
6/22/2009 10:03:18 PM
Yes. You have to play the game. Its all a game. I hate playing it, people say they dont play games, but thats exactly what you gotta do to keep attraction. Just try it. As hard as it will be to do, and it is, u need to try and force the woman to chase you back. Dont text or call for days at a time in the beginning, etc. Some will even have the guts to ask why you are doing this, but they will keep on chasing. Eventually you need to reciprocate and let them catch up, so you chase them a bit, then you make them chase you again.
Its just hard to keep this crap up for long periods of time. Eventually someone gives in(usually me) and chases too hard and the challenge is gone and the game is over. I lose. I never believed all that game playing crap until i actually tried it. As long as you can keep it up, you can keep the fires burning. There's nothing wrong with harmless game playing, just most abuse it once they find out it works.
destructodave
Joined:
4/18/2009
Msg:
22 (
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Are some of us just incompatable with the opposite gender?
Posted:
6/22/2009 9:56:37 PM
Are you only talking about women on the site? For one you gotta realize most women on a site like this have some highly trumped up standards whether ppl admit it or not. No matter what they look like or how awful a person they are, there is probably a billion messages waiting in their inbox telling them how awesome they are how and making them feel like they deserve some gift from god delivered in their laps. You cant blame them for thinking this i guess because hell if anyone got that many compliments a day you'd eventually believe it too. Im gonna guess you just didnt live up to those expectations when they met you in person. Maybe your not as attractive in person. or they dont like your personality. Hell with them who cares. Just keep wading thru em till you find one that does.
Guys arent off of the hook either. Most guys here only have a profile to try and score easy sex. Oh and Ill get flamed for this, but I think most of us that are actually using this site for real dating probably has something wrong with us deep down somewhere otherwise we'd have the ability to go out and do it normally. So yep there is probably something deep down somewhere wrong with you. And the date you went to meet. Find it, fix it, and hell u probably wont need this site anymore.
I personally know my flaws and im trying to work on them but its easier said then done.
destructodave
Joined:
4/18/2009
Msg:
197 (
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Ladies, Want to know what happened to all the Nice Guys?
Posted:
6/22/2009 2:09:36 PM
There is no full blame people. More often then not, its 50/50. Women wanna think they get off scott free because its all the guys fault he is like that. Guys wanna blame the women like its all their fault they got run over. Its both.
Seriously, if you pick up a hitcher and get killed, did you deserve it? was it all your fault? hell no it wasnt. You have some blame because it was stupid to pick up that hitcher, but its not your fault he was a damn murderer.
Alot of it has to do with who your attracted to and how things happen. Everyone is attracted to the wrong people. Even guys. We get attracted to the girl everyone wants, and of course she is also the person who will do you the dirtiest. And these girls will add up and eventually you cant deal with that crap anymore. And for one, its alot more fun to play the game then sit in the corner and be yourself.
Being a jerk is like going to the club. I hate to dance. I cant stand it. But its alot better to get out there and dance with someone then to keep my ass holed up in a corner somewhere. So for guys becoming jerks, its alot more fun to be a jerk and play the game then to be yourself and wait around for ms. right while getting stomped on.
Alot of the change has to do with who you pick and how you were done. Ive had 1 good breakup. She was a good girl. No hard feelings, i didnt feel like going out and being a jerk and doing some girl bad. It just wasnt in the cards. But I, like many nice guys, have an attraction problem. We want the bad girl, same as girls want the bad guy. And this girl usually cheats, lies, or generally stomps on your heart like its nothing, and these types of breakups eventually push you to be the one in control not the one getting controlled. So in effect, it is our nice guy fault for being stomped on by these women because we picked them. We doormatted it up and got stomped on. But like my analogy earlier, you cannot take blame off the women who done the stomping. thats like saying its all the women's fault her husband beat her ass. Did she know 100% for sure he was gonna do it? no. most of us that pick these women always have a percieved notion that they are good inside until it hits the fan.
I for one, am a different type of nice guy. I dont have problem meeting women. I can spark interest and get the ball rolling, just midway thru i turn into a nice guy and am no longer a challenge anymore. Its all a game. Every bit of it is a game, and once you go nice, you quit playing the game and lose her interest. Its funny how much simply not calling a girl for days at a time can keep her wanting you. As long as you continue to play the game you will keep the woman. Us nice guys quit playing. All women want games. guys do too.
Im about done turning into the nice guy halfway thru. u can call me a crybaby about it, say all you want. I never turn into the nice guy to get laid, i go that way for the same reason alot do, you think you found an awesome person and you stop worrying about all the games and the attraction meters. You simply be yourself and attempt to please her, but you go overboard in her mind and drive her away.
So with that said ive kept the jerk act up. It works wonders. Yep thats dirty, mean, and i should just be myself. But i also want to play the game and could care less what anyone else thinks about how i go through life anymore. Yep, im bitter now, deep down i may not even be nice anymore. And alot of it is my fault. I put myself in bad situations. But its hard to sit back and blame myself for cheaters and liars that contributed to my epiphany on how not to get hurt. And while simply picking another type of woman would probably be the smartest thing to do besides being someone different, its also much harder and its human nature to take the path of least resistance. You cannot fix who your attracted to. And if your attracted to Bad women, you better change your personality quick or your gonna be destroyed alot. This last paragraph is bitter sounding, and typical nice guy stuff. But really what else is there to say? Us that made the change sucked it up. We got rid of the nagging problem in our personalities that were causing us problems. We did take it to the extreme, but if it aint broke dont fix it.
destructodave
Joined:
4/18/2009
Msg:
36 (
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Stairmaster vs treadmill vs elliptical
Posted:
4/30/2009 12:56:08 AM
i like the stairmaster or treadmill.
destructodave
Joined:
4/18/2009
Msg:
14 (
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Is Fitness a Lifestyle or a Sport for most folks?
Posted:
4/30/2009 12:55:39 AM
depends. does help you stay motivated if you make it a sport
destructodave
Joined:
4/18/2009
Msg:
40 (
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What [are] the best running shoes for you?
Posted:
4/30/2009 12:45:09 AM
addidas for me. they seem to fit the best
destructodave
Joined:
4/18/2009
Msg:
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Definition of a Six Pack
Posted:
4/30/2009 12:43:52 AM
just depends on where that person stores fat. i store mine on my butt and stomach.
destructodave
Joined:
4/18/2009
Msg:
43 (
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Music that helps you through your workouts
Posted:
4/30/2009 12:43:05 AM
eye of the tiger
destructodave
Joined:
4/18/2009
Msg:
352 (
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When is taking a drunk girl home from a bar and having sex considered rape?
Posted:
4/26/2009 10:40:25 PM
yes, when they consume the same exact amount of alcohol. Whos to say the dude didnt drink a ton and is plastered? i mean i get plastered regardless of a higher tolerance than a woman. Guys usually drink more. To say a guy reacts better is still dumb. It ought to be 50/50. If they both were drunk, it shouldnt just be the guys fault it happened.
Double standards on something this important to someone's life, being a sex offender, shouldnt be.
destructodave
Joined:
4/18/2009
Msg:
349 (
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When is taking a drunk girl home from a bar and having sex considered rape?
Posted:
4/26/2009 7:47:45 PM
I just had a friend that had this crap happen to him. He didnt get charged, but just the audacity of pulling a stunt on someone like this irks me to no end.
destructodave
Joined:
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Msg:
348 (
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When is taking a drunk girl home from a bar and having sex considered rape?
Posted:
4/26/2009 7:44:50 PM
yes this is one of those ridiculous laws. Why is this type of drunk considered someone else's fault? I mean people get drunk and drive, hit other cars and injure people or kill them. Yet, that person is charged with making bad decisions. Might as well charge the people he hit for not avoiding the drunk because he didnt know any better. See how stupid that sounds? Drunk or not i think everyone is responsible for their own actions. You ought to not get drunk if you act a fool. Its not someone elses fault you were soliciting them for sex and they take it.
Another thing, alot of times the guy is drunk too. Yet he gets no sympathy at all for him being drunk. Apparently guys brains work much better on alcohol than a woman's, since she didnt know any better and he did. Awesome stuff.
This society needs to grow up. People get offended by the slightest remarks, people go to jail for the dumbest crap, and then you got crap like this happening with some guy who just thought he was getting lucky, it was his night, for some girl to regret acting like a slut. Now if the guy intentionally drugged her, kept going when she didnt wnat him too, or purposely got her drunk just to sleep with her, then by all means persue.
Guys get taken advantage off too you know. Alot of guys have gotten drunk and woke up in the wrong situation and you just man up and chalk that up to stupidity. Not the woman's fault.
Crap like this just irks me to no end. Esp. when usually both parties are plastered. Double standards.
destructodave
Joined:
4/18/2009
Msg:
46 (
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Masturbation over sex?
Posted:
4/26/2009 1:50:35 AM
Well, as many have posted, maybe he just didnt have the energy or drive or the want to go through an actual sex session. Making sure everyone is happy is draining all the time. 5 minutes alone and he can fufill his needs without putting alot of effort in, just the way it is.
And from my own experience, it may just be spur of the moment. Sometimes as a guy you will just be sitting there not even thinking about sex in the slightest, and then just say to yourself, "i think im gonna go masturbate" and you do. The thought just crosses your mind and you do it. Most guys have been masturbating half their lives this way, just when the thought arises, and its not a habit you can just up and break if you dont have to.
He may not use you everytime for bjs or whatnot because it would make me feel guilty personally. If i was just calling my woman in to give me a quick orgasm every single time i wanted to masturbate, then id feel like a douche. Id start to feel really guilty about not pleasuring her at all, just using her as something to cum in instead of my hand. The guilt would add up quick. And as much as you seem adamant about pleasing him whenever he feels like it, id say if he consistently just got you to blow him or give him a hand job and then go about his day like he would if he just masturbated, you would eventually get bothered by it too.
thats the beauty of masturbation for a guy. couple minutes and then he can get back to whatever he was doing no hassle. Id say he cant have sex with you and just get up without talking for a few min. or get a bj and just go on about his day like you didnt exist. Thats what he wants. Just a quick orgasm with 0 strings attached. No talking, no nothing.
destructodave
Joined:
4/18/2009
Msg:
9 (
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Review me
Posted:
4/25/2009 8:36:40 PM
ok ive made a few slight changes. Brain is really failing me right now lol. but hopefully a few small incremental changes here and there will add up to a better whole.
destructodave
Joined:
4/18/2009
Msg:
8 (
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Review me
Posted:
4/25/2009 4:54:46 PM
k gotcha. yea i need some more pictures, have to invest in a camera. Old one is gone.
destructodave
Joined:
4/18/2009
Msg:
6 (
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Review me
Posted:
4/25/2009 3:57:06 PM
ah i was trying to be sarcastic with the pool and poker, but i guess i didnt convey it too well at all. Not great at them, just a hobby.
still working on fixing some of the problem lines you guys picked out.
destructodave
Joined:
4/18/2009
Msg:
4 (
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Review me
Posted:
4/25/2009 3:37:35 PM
oh i have a job, its not bad, i just hate it. Im just not a sugar-coater. Ill fix that. ill do some renovations
destructodave
Joined:
4/18/2009
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Review me
Posted:
4/25/2009 1:30:14 PM
Hi people. heres my profile. As much as it'll sting, be brutal and honest. I just got on here so i dunno how good or bad it is, but in my area i need to have my best foot forward early on.
I got a little writer's block so im gonna come right and say i know it needs some sprucing up, i just cant figure out exactly how to do it. So any help is appreciated.
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