Oh lookie......we're right back to the insecure point
What do I care if my guy f*cked his now friend at some point?
If they're cool with still being friends.......that's just another good point to me!
People that can't be civil w/ their ex's carry too much baggage for my taste.

As for your STD theories.........a woman can get all those from just one partner.
So "how many" doesn't really hold much credence to your point.

Why?
Insecure much?
Which goes back to my original point in this thread.......that I think those that ask "how many" are insecure.

please let me know what i should or should not keep to myself. any questions answered

i would say what is in the past is just that history

I respect your opinion on this, although I disagree with it. I think the "how many?" question is an oddball question for an adult to ask another adult. I've given reasons why it might be asked, and none of those reasons involve truly getting to know a partner better.

There are lots of great things to discuss! Focusing on the here and now will actually create a lot more intimacy and connection between the man and woman

Now you know there is a big difference between being discerning and being judgmenatal...one requires a preference, and the other exacts an expectation on which the "judged" will surely fail

But it doesn't automatically preclude that women with a high number will cheat...
And you have already stated that a high number is purely subjective...

All I can say is ~ where were these girls when I was 16-17??? We were sure looking for them at that time! Now we look to avoid them.

The comparison game is a brutal one---brutal to the prospect of any intimacy. You can't make useful comparisons without knowing the specifics of what she did with other dudes. Who cares what happened with some other guy? You've replaced him.

You should want all her focus on you. You don't want her trying to recall (or trying to lie about) what she did with some ex so you can have her duplicate that with you.

The goal is to make it so she rarely thinks about the past. Look, digging into the past tends to bring her old pain, her old chaos, and her old garbage right into the middle of what you're trying to build with the girl. Recalling the past can taint the current. It stinks it up.

What passes as entertainment today often exceeds any perversions in ancient times

i think its awesome, how can something that feels so right be so wrong?

i have no negative feelings about what i'm doing

Hmm, is he jealous she's been getting more than he has? Is he afraid he doesn't have the sexual stamina to keep up with her.

So how many ladies can a guy sleep with and not be a whore?
And how many men do ladies have to sleep with to qualify as a slut?

My guess is this relationship is doomed, and if they get married, he won't ever be able to put this out of his mind, and at some point, it will come out and they will split anyway.

He just needs to be honest with her and say he can't deal with it. Or he can suggest they go to couples therapy so he is sure he can cope long term.

every so often he will pick me up with one of 2 buddies of his and it ends in a 3 some
he never touches the other guy, so its not a gay thing, they just do really awesome things to me.

The number doesn't matter to me.

really get annoyed by the double standards by some of these people, she got down with 83 dudes at her age that is very impressive,but my point is too many people are very quick to slap the slut label on this girl, especially guys when they know if their boys knocked off 83 women they would be hooriding it up. Sayin you da man, and thats my boy.~op~ if you love the girl and feel you have a future with her than do what you were thinking of doing, maybe having an std test might not be a bad idea, but ultimately it is your decision. good luck.

Obviously, he was better in bed than they were, or she wouldn't be marrying him.

Gene Simmons brags that he has slept with over 3,500 women and yet his girlfriend of over 20 years and mother to his two children still stays with him.
You guys really need to get over these double standards. It sickens me.

You guys really need to get over these double standards. It sickens me.

How many had he slept with?
(Just out of curiosity's sake.)

To me it seems that women in america have slept with more partners than men have.

She cannot be special for him.

Some people are downright pigs, and cheating is not justifiable even if your needs aren't met.

The test is very accurate after you have been infected for six months.
You don't get false negatives as far as I know.

No. You have to trade sex for sex. If you don't look at sex that way, then you aren't looking at men and women as being equals.

The researchers tested the skin of herpes patients for several weeks after their sores had healed and found that, compared with other genital skin, from twice to 37 times more immune cells remained at the locations where the sores had been.

I've never been a swinger, but the 2 couples I know that do are very happy in their relationship

She wanted me around but didn't want to be physical with me in any way, I was forced to end it not because of sex but because she became so cold and distant.

Bullsh1t. If there is one type of woman I consider to be a complete luser, it's a woman who thinks I ought to have to ``win'' her.

it's mostly about men wanting to get some strange....
Just goes to show that you really don't actually know any women that are swingers, and not just barely willing participants in their husbands activities.

on the contrary Mustang, in my experience the intimacy has increased through the lifestyle.

I know some people who are into the swingers lifestyle and really like it and seem happy.

If you have a good sex life dont worry about prior relationships.

If he doesn't respect you then he must not respect himself....because from where I am sitting...he is no less a "slut" than you seem to think you are.

What I do want to know from a new partner is that she's healthy and STD-free. That's way more important, and you can't determine that from the number of former partners she's had.

The differences in men are not THAT vast and if she picks you after all the experience, you must be doing something right

To me, a slut is someone that can sleep around alot for their own personal satisfaction and have no emotional ties to those people, that has never been my case.

I would feel like I'm the latest and won't be the last! In short, I won't feel at all special or important to her.

Well, I know the difference between making love and fvcking. I am not fvcking my boyfriend. Never have, and never will, for fvcking to me is a mindset. My current relationship knows the difference between making love and fvcking. Everyone knows the difference between making love with someone while you are involved in a relationship and casual sex.

It has nothing to do with being insecure which is the usual label thrown at people that feel like I do.

An ex of mine had a problem with my lesbian and bi friends (he indicated that both lesbianism and bisexuality were unhealthy and unnatural), which is part of the reason why he's my ex. It's sad that we live in such a judgmental society.

Either grow some balls or date men I reckon.

Something about sex in the rain just seems hott..

My male friends know this about me, and respect that boundary. They would never even think about suggesting a FWB relationship.

I simply love the female body and feel blessed she has given me the privilege to have sex with her. Grow up, little boys.

dude, 1 how do u feel about her,do u really care what other peoplw think
2 more partners comes more experience.
3 is it her fault if she likes sex

This is one of those silly comments that mean nothing except you doubt your skill in keeping your woman satisfied.

If a guy my age had slept with 100+...I'd be like 'wow, how did you manage that'.