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Auburnred67

Joined: 5/31/2009

Msg: 63 (view)

When you spend more time analyzing and stressing over the things... Posted: 11/7/2009 6:52:59 AM
DJ-78, No Doubt ! Couldn't have said it better myself !

Auburnred67

Joined: 5/31/2009

Msg: 22 (view)

That part wasn't a generalization -- I was pointing out.... Posted: 11/7/2009 6:30:59 AM
Confident-Realist, I understand where you are coming from. Thank you for clarifying that. :) I agree that it is definitely not just an age thing.... IMO, there are always going to be people who really don't mind who they spend time with; they just don't want to be alone. And then there are those that are more geared to "quantity" than "quality."

Auburnred67

Joined: 5/31/2009

Msg: 19 (view)

With that said, a woman in her 30s or 40s -- you'll still find that too. Posted: 11/5/2009 7:22:54 PM
I think you forgot IMO here..seems like an over generalization to me. Let me tell you, as a woman who will be "fresh" off a divorce very soon... I am already very honest with myself about what I need in a relationship and what I can offer someone. I don't think everyone needs to date oodles of people before they become more selective and choose people who are a good fit. Believe me, I don't plan on wasting time dating just any guy, for the sake of dating. If I am not interested in someone...I don't pursue it...it's that simple. If I met a good match and we were mutually into eachother on many levels...that would become the focal point without hesitation.

Auburnred67

Joined: 5/31/2009

Msg: 48 (view)

My concern with these two is that past patterns and present conduct with one another.. Posted: 10/24/2009 10:17:10 AM
Helen0426, I noted the past patterns....the intensity...and the timing... not "ideal" I agree... When you think about it, though, how many opportunities in life and love really are? (ideal) The truth is we never really know the purpose when we meet someone, or if they will be in our life for a moment, a season or a lifetime... The best part is : canadianguy976 is conscious of and reflecting on his past while trying to change his future..he just doesn't want to be alone the whole time he does that..

Auburnred67

Joined: 5/31/2009

Msg: 46 (view)

Some of you ladies are tagging me as some sort of an insenitive manipulating a-hole Posted: 10/24/2009 6:37:23 AM
Canadianguy976, I have the utmost respect for you for speaking from your heart..... I can't begin to tell you how strongly your post resonates with me... I have been separated for 14 months and I am in the final stages of divorce. I have spent the last year alone -so I can pretty much identify with you 100% IMO, it seems there is a lot of undue criticism here from some other OP's. From my perspective, your post rings of sensitivity, compassion and sincerely making every effort to be open and honest about your thoughts, feelings and needs. At the same time, you acknowledge the emotional uncertainty and want to proceed with caution. The other impression I get is that your urge to reach out is stronger than the urge to retreat..that is a good sign. Given what you have been through..taking time to heal is good.... However, I for one, do not believe that we have to "heal" alone. It is human nature to want to connect.. share affection, companionship and even sex. It is clear to me that your goal is to do that with class. I can't tell you how much I admire that! IMHO, if more people took this approach, the world would be a better place.

Auburnred67

Joined: 5/31/2009

Msg: 72 (view)

You don't need to be married or be in a realtionship to enjoy life... Posted: 9/22/2009 6:30:18 PM
yarimelma, You are so right! Could not have said it any better....a positive attitude is imperative...

Auburnred67

Joined: 5/31/2009

Msg: 1063 (view)

I intellectually regurgitate that mindset everytime I see someone express it. Posted: 9/19/2009 4:37:18 AM
youcanimagine, I'm not going to label you...or judge you....I think the words below taken directly from your profile speak volumes... Can I ask just one little question though? If you were a magnet....how would you draw women to you? "I'm still searching because in all my years I have never met a girl that is willing or capable within a relationship, of giving me the true communication, reassurance and reciprocation of my efforts that I need in order to be happy. I've never known a girl, ever, that didn't seem to need an instruction manual to understand how to just simply communicate, and make an effort. I've encountered hopeless and absolute incompetence regarding emotion and communication, with every single girl that I've ever been involved with. That may sound ugly but it's the God's honest truth of my experiences; there have not been any exceptions."

Auburnred67

Joined: 5/31/2009

Msg: 1061 (view)

Most women over 40 think they know what they are looking for but Posted: 9/19/2009 2:04:48 AM
... "but find out in the end that they made a mistake and then it's too late whether its pride or what ever they can't just say I'm sorry or lets work it out." Interesting perspective... And some are into personal growth and try to work it out-month after month, year after year to no avail....finally realizing that it is OVER...and they are ready to move on... They realize that it "takes two" willing hearts to create and maintain a loving, successful relationship: based in truth, respect..equality, mutual give & take and lots of compromise. IMO, happiness "within" each person is required FIRST....so many people are looking for someone to make them happy...or seeking happiness from "outside" themselves...when what they really need to do first, is create it "within" themselves.. Once that happens, I think it is so much easier to find someone...cuz' then you're not looking for someone to fill up an emptiness..you are looking for a "complimentary spirit" to share life with.

Auburnred67

Joined: 5/31/2009

Msg: 101 (view)

but I told him that "people misuse terminology." Posted: 9/17/2009 3:30:05 PM
Hey Confident-Realist- Is it really "misuse of terminology?" Let's face it....IMO, we all have our "own" terminology....and that's why there are so many challenges with communication....among the same gender...cross gender...and from generation to generation. We are all individuals (not clones : ) with varying experiences that result in different definitions, perspectives and opinions and more....Think about it....

Auburnred67

Joined: 5/31/2009

Msg: 56 (view)

Save your money, or be tested daily. Posted: 9/15/2009 3:53:18 AM
OP, do you also believe "Ingnorance is Bliss?" OMG, IMO it is completely insane that you would advise against blood testing!!! To each his own... I agree that it is not perfect and is time sensitive, but NOT test at all ? I 100% agree with you... protected sex with a trusted partner is the BEST option. But these days you can't be too sure... From my perspective...some blood testing is better than no blood testing or playing "Russian Roulette" like some people do ! I'm one year out of a long-term monogamous marriage and will definitely be asking for blood testing...and reciprocating. In a perfect world there would be: no lying, no cheating, no unprotected sex....whatever that means....but the truth is we do not live in a perfect world...........we never have and we never will! Take off the rose colored glasses and look around.. People lie, people have multiple partners, people cheat...yes, even people who we believe are trustworthy. I hope that your risk is as low as you think it is...for your healths sake. I'm not saying to be paranoid-just respsonsible that's all. Even with AIDS and all the education about the health risks people are still having "unprotected sex." That is the REALITY we all have to face-unfortunately ! Check your local health department for FREE testing options :)

Auburnred67

Joined: 5/31/2009

Msg: 296 (view)

Astrology Accuracy and Couple Compatibility Posted: 9/2/2009 1:35:30 AM
Dunrich- Amen brother! Thank you so much for listing the bible passages. I have been studying astrology for quite some now. Been criticized often. I find it to be very accurate IF natal charts are used. That involves birth times and can reveal the "ASCENDANT," (significant) which IMO, is just as important as the SUN sign. If you look further, this may explain your compatibility with those who may not otherwise be compatible with your sun sign. Interesting that you compared astrology results to Jungs personality and found similarities. I compared the Taylor-Johnson temperment analysis to the results of a couple capatibility report created-using the accompanying software and book called Mapping Your Romantic Relationships by David Pond. I highly recommend this book, you may want to check it out Astrology goes very deep if you decide to "dig." Emotional, communicational and sexual compatibility are the areas I focus on most. What I have found...is very revealing. :jump

Auburnred67

Joined: 5/31/2009

Msg: 59 (view)

Age differences in dating - What's the gap for you? Posted: 8/21/2009 1:45:54 PM
IMO the age gap really depends on the maturity level of both people involved. If maturity is there along with great communication, common values and a high level of compatibility in other areas..It would not hold me back that's for sure!!! : )

Auburnred67

Joined: 5/31/2009

Msg: 113 (view)

Honesty about Intimate Encounter Posted: 8/16/2009 8:36:15 PM
Kudos to you for being upfront about wanting an intimate encounter. I for one, really appreciate it. I think being candid about it is very commendable! I realize that there are people who like to have sex as soon as possible... and find intimate encounters exciting... thrilling even! I must confess that I am a woman who weeds out men looking for an "intimate encounter." Without a mental connection, trust and great chemistry....there is something seriously missing for me. Not to mention concerns about health and safety. Can't be too careful today... Several weeks ago I heard a story about a woman who hooked-up with a man from Traverse City in G.R. He tied her up and violated her all weekend then brought her back to G.R. and dropped her off : ( I really have a thing for intelligent, educated men and love getting to know them...finding out who they are.....as a person. It is worth it!! It takes time to find out if someone is "caring, loving and trustworthy" ....three more things that make sex EVEN better.. IMO most honest, caring, loving men will be willing to take the time if they are looking for something more than SEX.

Auburnred67

Joined: 5/31/2009

Msg: 293 (view)

Do you believe in Astrology? Posted: 8/16/2009 4:22:28 AM
Of course astrology cannot ever predict an exact outcome...What it can do is predict a high or low probability of an outcome occurring. Have you heard of Predictive Astrology? Book by Carol Rushman

Auburnred67

Joined: 5/31/2009

Msg: 17 (view)

Astrology and relationships: What's your sign?? Posted: 8/16/2009 4:11:40 AM
Step Princess-Do you examine love asteroids? Do you use predictive astrology? Pinpoint unknown birth times ? (using dates of major life events) Curious aboout the websights you access? My favs are Astro.com and CafeAstrology.

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