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Thread: Enslaved to the System

CharlieBrown_AR

Joined: 6/19/2009

Msg: 100 (view)

Enslaved to the System Posted: 9/10/2009 1:22:30 AM
Lumps spat out at choir practice as you fill your heart with song How can love that feels so right turn out to be so wrong? As I ponder your words they sound so near and true to pain I often feel Better to have loved and lost? Sometimes seems a shady deal Comfort and solace I sometimes find in pages found in a wastebasket I hope to achieve those words I believe from now until the casket Life is for living nothing more no more mysterious than sands The devil finds time for idle hands watching mine as well as the other man's Enjoy the love you feel Treat it as it's real Savor and revel in its reveal If love proves not true, it is okay as you might find one day it to be the last thought you remember of your journey that began shining bright in May as it shimmers and dims towards December To Sarah..I like your thread. I understand your frustration and laughed until I cried at the "40 year old" stuff.

CharlieBrown_AR

Joined: 6/19/2009

Msg: 8 (view)

Sketchup/Google Earth Posted: 8/30/2009 9:57:34 PM
Another good for prearranging furniture and wall coloring is Sweet Home 3D.

CharlieBrown_AR

Joined: 6/19/2009

Msg: 189 (view)

...A Sexual Relationship WITHOUT Emotional Attachments... Posted: 8/16/2009 12:35:02 PM
I can't speak for anyone else, but I think it is difficult at best to do so. I have only been in two relationships of this type. The first ended quickly because without the connection, it just seemed cold and became less enjoyable over time. The last time I tried this type of relationship, the connection was out of this world; like something you think you could only read about. I feel head over heals in love with this girl rather quickly. The problem was that it was one sided. She never lied to j me or led me on, but it just was never there for her I guess. Not her fault. Just the way it is. It didn't take long for the relationship to deteriorate, as we grew further apart and finally I had to leave the relationship. So, I am not saying it isn't possible, but Ido think it unlikely that you could be intimate with someone long term and not have feelings for them. Just my opinion.

CharlieBrown_AR

Joined: 6/19/2009

Msg: 37 (view)

Need some advice please (no sarcasm or rude replies please) Posted: 8/16/2009 12:27:33 PM
If there is no chance of reconcilliation that you can see, you have to let go and move on. I know it is not as easy as it sounds as I am going through something similar myself, but time waits for no one. If you wait around for someone who doesn't feel the same for you then you will be waiting the rest of your life. Date without expectation of "feeling" for someone and just enjoy yourself. It is great that you are being honest with yourself and others. You will have feelings for someone when the time is right. It sounds like you have a really good grasp on what is going on. You will be fine. Good luck in your journey.

CharlieBrown_AR

Joined: 6/19/2009

Msg: 7 (view)

my bloke of 4 years found met someone on here and now i dont know what to do Posted: 8/16/2009 12:19:50 PM
First off, you can lose what you never had to begin with. I learned that recently myself. My ex didn't cheat, she just didn't feel the same about me as I did her. Either way, it hurts, but trust me, you haven't lost anything. It is very admirable that you gave him a second chance. Everyone makes mistakes. If we didn't, we wouldn't be human. Apparantly, he either didn't appreciate that second chance, or he just decided he wanted to move on. With him giving you access to his emails, he either wanted you to find out about this other girl, or just didn't care. And btw, she didn't wreck the relationship. He did. If she knew he was in relationship and went after him anyway, she has no respect for relationships and they won't last either. However, if he was really yours, she could not have taken him away from you. You are trying to move on, which is exactly what you need to do. It will get easier with time. Someday you will find someone that you will leave no doubt as to how they feel about you. Good luck in your journey.

CharlieBrown_AR

Joined: 6/19/2009

Msg: 334 (view)

Paren-tales Posted: 8/5/2009 11:57:37 PM
Enjoy your two weeks, Sunshine Sweetheart. You have definitely earned them. Some day we will both look back at all of the time we spent studying things we never thought we would, losing sleep, losing quality time with those we care about, and it will all seem an instant, as we reap the rewards of our time and efforts...That is what I keep tellin myself anyway....Hope to see you over break. Two finals back to back tomorrow(today actually) and I will be enjoying some off time too..

CharlieBrown_AR

Joined: 6/19/2009

Msg: 82 (view)

When are you most happiest? Posted: 7/12/2009 9:31:49 PM
I am the most happiest when: I am accelerating on a motorcyle. after a completing a job. after resolving something that seemed unresolvable. seeing the look on my son's face when he learns something new and interesting. when I am holding my sweetheart in my arms, seeing the smile on her face and the sparkle of her eyes.

CharlieBrown_AR

Joined: 6/19/2009

Msg: 12 (view)

What Do I believe? Posted: 7/12/2009 9:07:36 PM
Okay, first off, I think it was very tasteful on your part that you didn't just assume those emails were correct. I feel like most would have convicted the guy before he had been tried. That being said though, it isn't just women that jump to conclusions, but men as well. I applaud you on your restraint. That had to have been difficult to deal with. Whether the emails were true or not, you did the most graceful thing. My point of view is that if he really wanted to move in with you, he would already be there. As far as him living with his ex-wife goes, I don't see how someone could possibly NOT be hurt and suspicious to have their partner living with an ex-spouse. There is no other way to look at that than what it is. He wants to stay there, with her, or he wouldn't be there. The longer this goes on, the more you are going to hurt as he has no intentions of moving away from her. The best thing you can do for yourself is to walk away from this. No good will come of it for you. You will only be hurt worse. That is my opinion. Good luck to you and God Bless

CharlieBrown_AR

Joined: 6/19/2009

Msg: 6 (view)

Relationships Posted: 7/12/2009 8:31:47 PM
Is it wrong to expect a man to say I love you if he does? I first thought that the answer was a no brainer, but after I thought about it, here is what I think. It is most definitely NOT wrong for you to ask that a man that loves you say he does. Expecting it might be something else entirely. If you have to come to expect a man to say it, then there might be a problem. You have told him how you feel about the situation. You have told him you love him. Either he does or doesn't love you. As far as his actions being enough, I say he is only HALF right. He is right from a man's point of view, to an extent, anyway. Of course, that doesn't work quite the same for women. Women do take more stock in words than men. We men do like to hear the words, but we tend to look more for your actions than your words. At least, that is how it is with me. That is why when you ladies wear an outfit you know we love to see you in, or cook our favorite dish, or flash those "just for your man" smiles at us, we feel loved and never question it. The words do enhance it for us though. Nothing wrong with that. We just react a little different than you. From what I have seen, women respond to the words first, then the actions to back them up. Nothing wrong with that either. You just react a little different from us. I think it takes BOTH actions and words to affirm. If he is having trouble saying it, there might be problems, BUT, he did say he did things that he felt conveyed it to you. You said his previous wife passed away. Were they married long? That could be playing into it too. If you loved someone for 30,40,50 years or so, it might not be that easy to tell a partner or 8 months that you love them. The promising thing about this though, is that the two of you are discussing it. As long as you are both communicating there is hope. You are not being unreasonable, but I think you should discuss it more before you give up. Just my two cents worth. Good luck and God Bless

CharlieBrown_AR

Joined: 6/19/2009

Msg: 8091 (view)

Lay Down Burden by Brian Wilson Posted: 7/5/2009 10:34:24 PM
So many years spent running away How many times I wished I could stay Too much emotion a hole in my heart Feeling alone since we've been apart And if I had the chance I'd never let you go Just want you to know [Chorus:] Lay down lay me down Lay me down Lay down burden How many things I wanted to do How many times spent thinking this through So many nights spent here by the phone Wonderin'if you felt just as alone And while some things have all been Crazy from the start It's tearing me apart [Chorus] Just remember the way I held you You're always in my heart [Chorus]

CharlieBrown_AR

Joined: 6/19/2009

Msg: 8090 (view)

Galveston by Glen Campbell Posted: 7/5/2009 10:29:12 PM
Galveston, oh Galveston, I still hear your sea winds blowin' I still see her dark eyes glowin' She was 21 when I left Galveston Galveston, oh Galveston, I still hear your sea waves crashing While I watch the cannons flashing I clean my gun and dream of Galveston I still see her standing by the water Standing there lookin' out to sea And is she waiting there for me? On the beach where we used to run Galveston, oh Galveston, I am so afraid of dying Before I dry the tears she's crying Before I watch your sea birds flying in the sun At Galveston, at Galveston [Instrumental to end]

CharlieBrown_AR

Joined: 6/19/2009

Msg: 8089 (view)

Lay Lady Lay by Bob Dylan Posted: 7/5/2009 10:25:15 PM
Lay, lady, lay, lay across my big brass bed Lay, lady, lay, lay across my big brass bed Whatever colors you have in your mind I'll show them to you and you'll see them shine. Lay, lady, lay, lay across my big brass bed Stay, lady, stay, stay with your man awhile Until the break of day, let me see you make him smile His clothes are dirty but his hands are clean And you're the best thing that he's ever seen. Stay, lady, stay, stay with your man awhile Why wait any longer for the world to begin You can have your cake and eat it too Why wait any longer for the one you love When he's standing in front of you. Lay, lady, lay, lay across my big brass bed Stay, lady, stay, stay while the night is still ahead I long to see you in the morning light I long to reach for you in the night Stay, lady, stay, stay while the night is still ahead.

CharlieBrown_AR

Joined: 6/19/2009

Msg: 3 (view)

Victim Of My First Internet Dating Posted: 7/3/2009 6:44:47 AM
It is sad that people use the internet as a tool to play other people. What happened to you happens to men as well. The main thing is to never give up. This does not have to be wasted time if you use it as a learning experience. It always hurts when we are lied to. Keep a positive attitude, but pay attention to those red flags. That is from a man's perspective. The best advice you are going to get though, is the advice you just recieved from JuJuBee. You will find someone someday that will make this experience seem like it never happened.

CharlieBrown_AR

Joined: 6/19/2009

Msg: 12935 (view)

Haiku Game - Continuance From Previous Thread Posted: 7/3/2009 6:34:47 AM
still soft voice speaks heart feels lighter feeling young as when the world was new day seems brighter

CharlieBrown_AR

Joined: 6/19/2009

Msg: 41 (view)

fan writes Posted: 6/29/2009 7:12:04 AM
Brizo, Thank you for the compliment. I really appreciate it. Girl 4 U09... Truer words have probably never been spoken..lol I hope all is well with everyone in their worlds this morning.

CharlieBrown_AR

Joined: 6/19/2009

Msg: 8057 (view)

Staring At the Sun by U2 Posted: 6/28/2009 11:39:55 PM
Summer stretching on the grass... summer dresses pass In the shade of a willow tree creeps a crawling over me Over me and over you stuck together with God's glue It's going to get stickier too... It's been a long hot summer let's go undercover Don't try too hard to think... don't think at all I'm not the only one starin' at the sun Afraid of what you'd find if you took a look inside Not just deaf and dumb i'm staring at the sun Not the only one who's happy to go blind There's an insect in your ear if you scratch it won't disappear It's gonna itch and burn and sting Do you want to see what the scratching brings Waves that leave me out of reach Breaking on your back like a beach... Will we ever live in peace? Cause those that can't do often have to Those that can't do often have to... preach To the ones staring at the sun... Afraid of what you'll find if you took a look inside Not just deaf and dumb... staring at the sun I'm not the only one who'd rather go blind Intransigence is all around... military is still in town Armour plated suits and ties... daddy just won't say goodbye Referee won't blow the whistle God is good but will HE listen I'm nearly great But there's something I'm missing I left in the duty free Though you never really belonged to me You're not the only one staring at the sun Afraid of what you'd find if you stepped back inside I'm not sucking my thumb I'm staring at the sun Not the only one who's happy to go blind

CharlieBrown_AR

Joined: 6/19/2009

Msg: 8056 (view)

Keeping the Faith by Billy Joel Posted: 6/28/2009 11:37:18 PM
If it seems like I've been lost In let's remember If you think I'm feeling older And missing my younger days Oh, then you should have known me much better 'Cause my past is something that never Got in my way Oh no Still I would not be here now If I never had the hunger And I'm not ashamed to say The wild boys were my friends Oh 'Cause I never felt the desire 'Til their music set me on fire And then I was saved, yeah That's why I'm keeping the faith Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah Keeping the faith We wore matador boots Only Flagg Brothers had them with a Cuban heel Iridescent socks with the same color shirt And a tight pair of chinos Oh I put on my shark skin jacket You know the kind with the velvet collar And ditty-bop shades Oh yeah I took a fresh pack of Luckies And a mint called Sen-Sen My old man's Trojans And his Old Spice after shave Oh Combed my hair in a pompadour Like the rest of the Romeos wore A permanent wave, Yeah We were keeping the faith Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah Keeping the faith You can get just so much From a good thing You can linger too long In your dreams Say goodbye to the Oldies but goodies 'Cause the good ole days weren't Always good And tomorrow ain't as bad as it seems Learned stickball as a formal education Lost a lot of fights But it taught me how to lose O.K. Oh, I heard about sex But not enough I found you could dance And still look tough anyway Oh yes I did I found out a man ain't about being macho Ate an awful lot of late night drive-in food Drank a lot of take home pay I thought I was the Duke of Earl When I made it with a red-haired girl In the Chevrolet. Oh yeah We were keeping the faith Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah Keeping the faith You know the good ole days weren't always good And tomorrow ain't as bad as it seems I told you my reasons For the whole revival Now I'm going outside to have An ice cold beer in the shade Oh, I'm going to listen to my 45's Ain't it wonderful to be alive When the rock 'n' roll plays, yeah When the memory stays, yeah I'm keeping the faith Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah Keeping the faith I'm keeping the faith, Yes I am

CharlieBrown_AR

Joined: 6/19/2009

Msg: 37 (view)

fan writes Posted: 6/28/2009 3:46:46 PM
JuJu... Glad you are smiling... But if it is a sin for me to win Then I will gladly face the penalty for my place In love's race. So long as I get to hear your voice in my ear And see the smile on your face

CharlieBrown_AR

Joined: 6/19/2009

Msg: 3917 (view)

DAILY QUOTES Posted: 6/27/2009 9:21:13 AM
If everyone is thinking the same thing, then someone isn't thinking. General George S. Patton It's not the size of the dog in the fight, but the size of the fight in the dog. Unknown..something my grandfather always told me. If you cheat someone out of a dollar, it will cost you ten times that later. A quote from my grandmother. If you can't handle me at my worst, you damned sure don't deserve me at my best. Marilyn Monroe Yesterday is history, tomorrow is mystery, and today is a gift. That is why it is called the "present". Something I saw on a billboard

CharlieBrown_AR

Joined: 6/19/2009

Msg: 28 (view)

fan writes Posted: 6/27/2009 8:56:11 AM
Although I have read some very interesting posts on various forums..the one that inspires and touches me is only one....JuJuBee. I am not an artistic guy by any means, I am more of technical guy, and I figure anything I would try to write would probably invoke laughter at the feeble attempts. I write anyway because anything that I write that would even remotely resemble a poem of any kind is written for one reason: To see JuJuBee smile.

CharlieBrown_AR

Joined: 6/19/2009

Msg: 8025 (view)

U2 - She's a Mystery to Me Posted: 6/23/2009 12:28:02 AM
Darkness falls and she Will take me by the hand Take me to some twilight land Where all but love is gray Where I can't find my way Without her as my guide Night falls I'm cast beneath her spell Daylight comes Our Heaven turns to Hell Am I left to burn And burn eternally She's a mystery to me She's a mystery girl She's a mystery girl She's a mystery girl She's a mystery girl In the night of love Words tangle in her hair Words soon to disappear A love so sharp it cuts Like a switchblade through my heart Night falls I'm cast beneath her spell Daylight comes Out Heaven turns to Hell Am I left to burn? And burn eternally? She's a mystery to me She's a mystery girl She's a mystery girl She's a mystery girl She's a mystery girl

CharlieBrown_AR

Joined: 6/19/2009

Msg: 7 (view)

Terrified Posted: 6/22/2009 11:11:17 PM
As a divorced father myself, I feel your pain, but I congratulate you also. If she doesn't want those kids, she at least had sense enough to bring them to you. Please forgive me if I seem bossy or pushy on this, but you are going to find out on this that time is of the essence. You don't have time to waste on this. The main thing is this: Your kids are safe and will be taken care of. Now, you need to see a lawyer. If you can't afford an office visit at the moment, find one that does free consultations. To get any help that you need...food stamps, health care, etc., you need full custody of those kids, and meet the income criteria. Also, if she is drawing those food stamps because of the kids, you will need to show you are the custodial parent to get that changed. She will still get them otherwise. It may not be this way where you live, but where I live, if the mother has custody and has any kind of aid, the father can't even see the files. The mother has to authorize in writing that the father can view the stuff. Bottom line: If those kids are going to live with you, get full custody of them. See your lawyer first thing, then call the DHS and tell them of the situation and if you can get help. They will direct you there. It will probably just consist of some writer's cramps from filling out paperwork, but it is a small price to pay. I know I have said this twice already, but whatever you do, SEE A LAWYER. Your case should be a cut-and-dry situation. Your grounds for custody will be abandonment. Even if she changes her mind later, you should win. Just don't waste any time filing. The sooner you get the lawyer and DHS things started, the sooner you can get custody and any help you may need and qualify for. I wish you the best of luck and as speedy a process as possible. I do have a friend that had the same thing happen to him, and he had custody in less than thirty days. No way of knowing if it will he that way in your case, but I certainly hope so and will keep you and your kids in my prayers. If you would, drop me a line or post how things go. I for one, will be cheering for you.

CharlieBrown_AR

Joined: 6/19/2009

Msg: 69 (view)

What Are Some Ways To Make Sure The Father is Involved? Posted: 6/22/2009 10:50:35 PM
I happen to be a father. My son's mother and I divorced when he was very young. I set up a file at the County Clerk's Office and told them my wages and had them set up a file for child support. This was done before I ever got served with divorce papers. I have been at every school event I possibly could, that I knew about. I have never missed a birthday either. In addition to child support, I pay for his haircuts, school clothes, and have even sent groceries home with him. I make sure he has what he needs. I am saying all of this not to brag on myself, but to make a point. If a man wants to be a dad to his kids, neither you, or anyone else for that matter, will have to make sure he is involved. He will be asking you about the parent/teacher conferences, mid-term grades, final grades, list for school supplies, etc, etc. A lady I used to know had to always be the bearer of bad news for her kids, as the father would arrange to visit the kids, but rarely showed up. He didn't pay child support either. She would garnish his wages and he would switch jobs. On the other side of that line, there are some men who find out about school events and so forth, AFTER the fact. So, the only thing I could say, with my experience as a divorced dad is to make sure the guy is informed. If the mother has full custody, she sees things brought home from school that the father won't know about unless there is communication. Other than that, it is pretty simple. If the father doesn't want to be a father, the kids are probably better off if he doesn't come around. Just my two cents..well, looks long enough to be a dollar's worth..

CharlieBrown_AR

Joined: 6/19/2009

Msg: 6 (view)

to go back or not to go back? Posted: 6/22/2009 10:24:33 PM
From what you have written here, it looks like you already know what you need to do. You are cheating youself if you keep going back to him.

CharlieBrown_AR

Joined: 6/19/2009

Msg: 1059 (view)

The Truth Posted: 6/22/2009 5:21:25 PM
I took you into my embrace holding a piece of heaven close to me. Embracing the truth as the winds flowed around us. Sharing our love in a window of borrowed time. Those things you saw in me, I saw them in you too Life does goes on and time stops for no one Children are raised and needs are addressed But ALL needs are relevant. Yours are too. NONE should have to go unattended The woman who loves and needs to be loved Can love and be loved if that is what you want. If you really want it bad enough And willing to do what it takes. Working together, With love and determination The sky is the limit on what can be achieved No one is an island. Not even you. Things don’t have to be completely dependent on you. You don’t have to be alone.

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